Pregnant After MMC - Thread 4

[Sakura54]

New thread for anyone pregnant after MMC.

Here’s our current list of scan dates and due dates. More to be added soon!

Scan Dates
@RosieJess91 Tuesday 10th November 11:30am (20 week)
@Poppy10121 Tuesday 17th November 9am (20 week)
@Workingmama1 Friday 20th November 9am (20 week)
@Lu93 Friday 20th November 10:20 (20 week)
@Pugprincess Monday 30th November 3pm (20 week)
@bubblybon20 Monday 7th December 9am (28 week)
@lollol86 Friday 11th December 11am (20 week)
@JoJo58995 Monday 14th December

Due Dates
@bubblybon20 - 27/02/21 BOY
@Sakura54 - 28/02/21 GIRL
@DanceM1 - 04/03/21 SURPRISE
@ew1990 - 12/03/21 GIRL
@SkyBlue20 - 13/03/21 GIRL
@smileyT - 15/03/21 BOY
@Dipsy77 - 15/03/21 TWIN GIRLS
@PhotoMum4 - 18/03/21
@RosieJess91 - 31/03/21
@Poppy10121 - 04/04/21 BOY
@Workingmama1 - 09/04/21 BOY
@Lu93 - 11/04/21
@Pugprincess - 17/04/21 SURPRISE
@lollol86 - 25/04/21
@JoJo58995 - 02/05/21

Congratulations, @Poppy10121! 🥰

@Threnody Hope the time flies by to your scan and happy birthday to your daughter! 💕

@Workingmama1 Bravo again, thank you for speaking up. Let’s hope it all stays like that now - you’d assume that if it’s like that in lockdown, it won’t change again! ☺️

@poppy10121 congratulations!

@Workingmama1 well done, you should be so proud ❤️

@Poppy10121 congratulations! Def time to relax & enjoy/plan 💙

Just catching up, that's amazing @Workingmama1. Brilliant that they took your words on board, no one should ever have to have gone through that like we did. I hope other districts follow suit.

Congratulations on your little boy @Poppy10121, bet it feels like such a big mile stone having your 20 weeks scan! I have mine on Friday and the nerves are seriously creeping in. It's not helping that I'm off work either to keep my mind off. Thankfully it's in the morning and hoping it comes round quick!

Hope everyone else is okay xx

Thought I'd add a little update on the bump!🥰

Morning all! Been awake since 4:30, worrying about movements 😩 I know it’s stupid as I have been feeling baby girl, I just didn’t feel her before I went to sleep as I would usually, but I did feel her in the evening. Movements also feel a bit lighter but presumably that’s just a change in position. It was clearly just playing on my mind as she had a quieter day yesterday. Have ordered myself a Kicks Count bracelet as this seems to be something I’m going to keep getting anxious about even though logically I know it’s ok. So stupid of me. Also, baby girl is so reassuring - whenever I start to worry too much, she boots me, so I woke up at 4:30 and by 5am she was wriggling around again. Love her! 🥰

@DanceM1 Bump is looking great! It’s madness how much mine is growing at the moment. My app says baby is going to double her weight (maybe size, too, I can’t remember) in the next four weeks, so I imagine it’s only going to grow more and more quickly, too!

Hope everyone is doing ok! Xx

Aw that’s fantastic @SkyBlue20 they certainly know how to worry us already xx

Lovely pic @DanceM1 xx

Well done @Workingmama1 this will help so many ladies.

Congratulations @Poppy10121 ❤️ I’ve got mine a week on Monday. I daren’t do anything proper until we have got past that. Xxx

Well. I’m attempting to go to school today. Being off is just avoiding what I think might actually be the problem and that’s the long drive to school. Unfortunately I developed an anxiety driving years ago and overcame it but it seems with maybe what I’ve been through and the added hormones that it’s rearing it’s ugly head. I’ve been ok driving to my local shops (about 3 miles away) but schools about 12 miles lol. I’m strange I know. Also I was finding it was just the morning drive and was ok coming home, I don’t dread school I actually love it so I don’t think it’s that either. I’ve come to the conclusion I need to keep fighting it as best I can for now and see how I go. I wasn’t bad every morning just worse here and there a couple of times a week. I have a few strategy to try and that’s listening to a podcast so let’s see if that helps too. Wish me luck lol xx

@SkyBlue20 I've been the same over movements! Im 25 weeks tomorrow so now at the point where you're supposed to call them with reduced movements but I still feel like there isn't a strong pattern. I either feel baby all the time (I think when he/she is a bit higher up) or i feel much less and i feel movements more inside if that makes sense..so they don't feel as strong. I assume its to do with baby's position and anterior placenta. Im going to speak to my midwife tomorrow about it.

I also feel like ive grown (baby's grown) a lot.. I really feel like im stretching now!

@Pugprincess Good for you but be kind to yourself and take it a step at a time. I hope today is going well for you. Dont know if I mentioned it before but I spoke to my head on Monday and she told me to stop worrying about being off and write off this week at least then see how I am. It really reassured me... I knew she would be like that anyway, she is very good with these things but im so paranoid!!

@DanceM1 I’m sorry you’re feeling the same, it’s such a worry, isn’t it?! I only really feel baby in the morning and the evening and I wish it were more but my app did say they sleep 20 hours a day at the moment so I guess it makes sense. I remember when I was longing for any movements and now I’m longing for more - I’m never pleased 🙈 Will you please let me know what your midwife says? I don’t feel like it’s big enough of a deal for me to call mine just yet but my appt isn’t until 2nd Dec! I do think the anterior placenta has a lot to do with it, it’s very frustrating.
I can’t believe you’re 25 weeks already, the time is going so quickly! Not long until you hit the third trimester!!

@Pugprincess Hope the drive in went well. A podcast sounds like a good idea and maybe give yourself a bit more time for the drive too so you can take it easy and not feel rushed.

@SkyBlue20 of course, I will let you know what she says! I know exactly what you mean... you're always told no to take risks with movement but then when you are feeling some its hard to know what is best..especially at this stage. When I spoke to head of antenatal clinic about my covid, I asked her about the movements then and told her what mine were like. She was lovely and said she was exactly the same and some days felt nothing at all at this stage. So that helped a little!

I've also got my appointment through to see the consultant on 1st December so that's good! I was going to book a scan for this week too for a little reassurance after covid but my husband said I would make people feel uncomfortable with my coughing which is quite right so I will wait until it eases off!

@Workingmama1 wow, well done you, that's great you made such a difference!

@SkyBlue20, @DanceM1 With my youngest, I went in several times for reduced movements. They're lovely, and never make you feel like you're being silly or wasting time. One time he had hiccups while I was hooked up to the machine, and that was really lovely and funny to hear.

Struggling a bit with waiting until Monday, and hoping that the fact I'm still getting lots of aches in my lower back/abdomen is a good sign, as I didn't have that last time at this stage. Feeling very sad as well, as my gran has cancer and doesn't have very long left now, and I was hoping I'd be able to tell her about the baby, but I don't think that's going to happen.

@Threnody oh Im so sorry to hear that. Hopefully you will get to tell her ❤️ My Grandma & Granda both held on until I’d travelled up North to see them, and passed the next day (6 years apart). Really hope it’s the same for you.

@SkyBlue20 I was the same last night. I usually find when I settle down to watch Bake Off, that's when he's the wriggliest, but I didn't get much last night and started getting worried. But when I lay down to go to sleep, suddenly he was all over the place. Even as I type this I had a feeling like he literally rolled over! Just as you think a routine is becoming apparent, it all changes!

Super proud mama moment today though, just before I left to pick up my son, I had a notification from the school app that he'd received a special badge and it was for having good manners! Nearly choked up with how proud I was feeling. I've been told he just comes across as naturally polite. And if that's the case, I'm just super proud and me and my OH must have done a pretty good job at raising him so far. 😭😭

And my step son is out of hospital! Yay! He managed to walk up a few steps, and he was discharged. Back at his mum's and will be mostly tucked up in bed relaxing for a few weeks! His mum has told us he's grown by about 3 inches, he was already towering over me and his dad!!

@Pugprincess What is it that makes you anxious? I understand driving anxiety and even parking. DS probably doesn’t even know I can drive lol.

Sorry to hear about your gran @Threnody

I think I felt the baby hiccuping for the first time. It was rhythmic as opposed to the usual thrashing. Weird that I’ve never felt that before despite feeling non stop movements for months now.

Had my 25w appt today. It was the usual stuff and listened to heartbeat. No bump measuring. I’ve had way too many appts and got 3 more at 28w all in the same week! 2 are on the same day (appt letters sent separately) which is dumb, so I’m going to try to change one but so far can’t even get through on the phone. The MW apologised and asked me what I was planning to do as the appt times didn’t make sense, whereas the other MW I saw last month thought it was fine and that I could just hang around the hospital for hours waiting.

Bump update at over 25w. Getting slightly rounder. My veins look a bit crazy, I know lol.

Hey 👋🏻

Thank you @SkyBlue20 the drive in went ok but it could have been better but at least I made it and without a full on panic attack. The podcast was good to listen too. I’ve chosen to listen to Kate lawlers one with her partner as it’s quite funny and all about her pregnancy.

@DanceM1, thank you! That’s great that your heads reassured you, if you are still coughing it’s def best to stay off work while you can as you def want to be as close to 100% as you can be for going back.

@Sakura54 I’m not too sure why I’m struggling with it so much. Years ago I had such a bad breakdown I couldn’t drive or shop or anything alone. I was getting taxis and lost my independence which made me depressed. I’ve suffered panic attacks since I was a child and I’ve been on a low dose medication for about 15 years now. It still requires some effort and fight from me some days though it’s no magic fix unfortunately. I think however maybe all the stress/worry/covid/miscarriage trauma and potentially hormones have started to heighten it again. I get this feeling of being trapped and wanting to pull over but it’s not always possible and then if I’m starting to feel funny it’s not ideal. I’ve made it there and back today though so hopefully I will get stronger if I keep facing it. One day at a time I guess. I’ve had things happen with other drivers too whilst preg and I think I just feel more vulnerable and protective of the baby. Like @skyblue said it would be nice to leave early and take my time but then there’s generally someone driving right behind you so you have to keep up to the speed limits or I feel rushed then, and for some people you’re never fast enough, even if you were doing more than the limit. X

@Threnody sorry to hear about your gran. Could you call her on the phone? We told DH grandma over the phone when she was in hospital xx

@Threnody I’m so sorry to hear about your gran 💕 is there no way you can tell her before the scan on Monday?

Awww @RosieJess91 that’s lovely about your son! Well done you and your OH! Glad your step son is doing well, too ☺️

@Sakura54 Hope you manage to get your appointments sorted, it’s such a strange old system they use and it ends up just not being the best use of anyone’s time! Bump is looking lovely!

I’m off work today and tomorrow and have enjoyed a nice slow start to the day. I’m just exhausted and my concentration is shot so wanted a few consecutive days to just recuperate a bit. Not too sure what to do with myself as DH is working but my mum is furloughed so we might meet in the park for a walk - it’s a nice day for it! ☺️ Have a lovely day everyone xx

@SkyBlue20 yeah it is strange. This is the second time they’ve messed up with appt days. Last time I had two appts at different locations around the same time! They’re obviously not checking before booking. The appts are at different zones in the hospital so two separate phone numbers and I was told that one of them can only be changed via phone (I tried to change it before when I was there). I wouldn’t mind going to the hospital to change the other, but just getting in is so long with the queuing, numerous temp checks, hand washing and questions!

Anyway I finally managed to get through to one and they said it can’t be changed as it was booked a while ago and is very important, but she can see I have another appt at a different department on the same day but potentially that one will be over the phone depending on lockdown. I’ll have to leave it I guess. Conveniently DH is off that day and DS will be in nursery, so we can always grab a bite while waiting for the next appt. It just means I’ll potentially be in hospital for about 5 hours altogether as the first appt is over 2 hours long and starts at 8am yawn

So DH isn’t entitled to Paternity Leave as he started his new job just a month too late, such bad timing. He will try to get unpaid leave instead. At least with a ELCS, he will be able to tell work the date in advance and depending on what restrictions are like and visiting hours in Feb, take time off accordingly. I stayed in hospital for days after last time. His job is very serious and can be dangerous so not the type you can just up and leave and they can’t have mobiles on them. That’s another reason it’ll be pretty bad if I go into premature labour again!

Had my 25 week appointment today and heard a really strong heartbeat which was so so lovely 🥰🥰 @SkyBlue20 I asked about movements.. she said I probably don't need to worry too much as there seems to be a pattern over a few days but to call triage anyway as always best to get checked... pretty much what I expected her to say I guess!

Has anybody ever seen/spoken to the same person more than once? I suppose it doesn't really matter but I've never met or spoken to my named midwife and I just would love to have somebody I felt comfortable turning to when I'm worrying!

21 weeks and I'm laying on the sofa watching my tummy move when the baby moves! I don't remember being able to see it until gone 30 weeks with my son. It's amazing! My OH is watching it too, and has been able to also feel it for a few weeks now!! 😃😃😃😃

@dancem1 glad you heard a heartbeat!!

@skyblue there's days where I dont feel her much and then just as i worry I get loads of kicks 😂
Midwife told me I should feel her everyday by 24 weeks (which is tomorrow) so if I don't to ring up and tell them.

@rosiejess it's mad isn't it. I couldn't see kicks till about 30 weeks with DD but been seeing them for a while now. My whole belly was shaking yesterdAy!

@Sakura54 Urgh, what a pain! Good that you can at least go grab some lunch with DH though ☺️
My DH isn’t entitled to paternity pay either - he’s freelance and currently working a part time contract on PAYE but won’t have been there long enough. I feel SO lucky that he works from home anyway, regardless of the pandemic, so he would always have been around when baby arrives and we can obviously just save up a bit so he can take time off from his freelance work for a while after the birth. I strongly believe that two weeks is not long enough for pat leave - it should be six weeks minimum I think!

@DanceM1 Ahh how lovely to hear the heartbeat 🥰 Thanks for the info on the movements, too. My community midwife said she’ll be mine right the way through - have only seen her at the 16 week appt so far but am expecting to see her again at the 25 week.

@RosieJess91 that’s amazing! 🥰 DH and I were just talking about being able to see movements, I can’t wait for that!

@ew1990 Thank you for feeding back what your MW said. I read your comment and thought ‘I thought she was only a day ahead of me 🤔’ and then realised that you are and that in two days’ time I’ll be TWENTY FOUR WEEKS, too. Time is flying!

My bump has grown SO much this week, it’s beginning to get a bit uncomfortable now, especially after I eat - it gets really tight and full feeling. Anyone else? I look properly pregnant now and am a bit scared at how much more it’s going to grow 🙈

@DanceM1 glad you heard a heartbeat. I've only had one midwife appointment so far, but from what she said I'll see her again. My first pregnancy I had the same two midwives all through, my second it was a different person each time, my third it was mostly the same midwife.

@RosieJess91 aw, it's lovely, isn't it!

Thanks @SkyBlue20, @Pugprincess, @Sakura54, @Starfish762, I don't think I'll get to tell her, as it's days she has left now, if that. She can't really talk now, and is bedridden. So I'd have to tell my aunt and get her to tell her. And I don't feel like I want to until I know everything is ok, in case it isn't, and the last thing I tell her isn't true iyswim.

@Threnody I'm so sorry about your gran 💕 we had a similar situation with my sister in law and we chose to tell her even though it was early, but it is a very individual decision and you need to do what feels right for you.

For those of you with anterior placentas....when did you first start to convincingly feel flutters etc? I'm 16+5 and I was sure I had felt some flutters beginning of last week but I'm not sure I've felt anything I can be sure about since. I know it's still early and I could see her wriggling around on the scan on sunday and couldn't feel it, I'm just so desperate to feel her for reassurance that she is still ok!