Gay Midwives

[LozzaT12]

Hi everyone, I’m a first year student midwife, I’m female and I’m attracted to women. I’m so grateful to have gotten my place at uni, never been happier, and I can’t wait to start my journey.
However, in the past few months I’ve spoken to old friends from school and many were shocked that someone who is gay is going into this profession. Many people have said it’s as weird as having a male midwife, some have straight up called it a bit creepy and that they would request someone else.
I’d never thought about it in any such way until this started and honestly it’s really shaken me and I want to know people opinions.
Would you not want me in the room? What comes to mind when you read this?

I wouldn’t be concerned at all about your sexuality as a pregnant woman. I have a male midwife at the moment and he does not make me feel uncomfortable in any way. He works in group practice with three other women and to be honest one of the older female midwives makes me feel uncomfortable because she is quite judgemental.

That you need new friends! Preferably ones who are less bigoted.

I hope this is a wind up, otherwise it's very sad.
If anyone has an issue with their midwife's sexual preference that is their issue.
Not worth wasting your time worrying about it x

Absolute nonsense. As long as you know your stuff, I really wouldn't give a toss who you were attracted to.

A lot of women are fine with male midwives. Personally, I wouldn't have been particularly comfortable with this, though I would struggle to articulate why. I'd have had absolutely no issue with a gay midwife, though - why would I? You would be there as a professional, your personal life would not be my concern.

I wouldn't think twice about it, to be honest if a midwife is looking at my vagina it's because I'm having an internal or I'm pushing out a baby - neither are exactly a turn on for anyone don't listen to your old friends, good luck in your course :)

My midwives’ sexual orientations were not discussed with me during my pregnancy or labour. Nor were those of the nurses and doctors who have cared for me and DD throughout our lives. I assume my health care professionals are just that, professional, and their personal lives are none of my business and shouldn’t have any impact on my care. If I had specific concerns due to unprofessional behaviour or poor care I would raise them.

Good luck with your training.

I have no idea about the sexuality of any of the midwives or obstetricians that looked after me when I had my DC. Tbh I think it would be weird if I did know. Why would I? Who would tell me and why?

Sorry, my previous post wasn't very clear. I should have said that I'd have had no issue with a gay female midwife. I would have been less comfortable with a male midwife, regardless of their sexuality.

What @misscupcakes said. Your "friends" don't have a problem with you being a gay midwife, they have a problem with yiu being gay full stop.

I don't care if you're gay, straight, bi, asexual or one of those people who fancy the Eiffel Tower as long as you bring my baby safely into the world in the easiest way you can.

I'm sure you'll be a fab midwife

OP, personally I wouldn't even think of my midwife's orientation, it is really not my business. Just saying, there are plenty of male gynaecologists out there.
I wouldn't pay attention to those negative comments. Best of luck with your course!

And yy to the posters who pointed out that the patients wouldn't be aware of your sexuality. It's just totally irrelevant.

I wouldn't mind. I might mind a man but the male paramedic who attended my BBA didn't bother me but you know pain and fatigue and he didn't give weird vibes

I have no idea of the sexuality of the two female midwives who delivered my baby, and I couldn’t have cared less. They were very good and lovely, if they were gay/straight/bi whatever it would have made no difference.

Absolutely no concern at all. I'm a heterosexual nurse but I'm pretty sure my male patients don't all think I fancy them including visits for private/intimate reasons! Don't give it a second though OP. Also pretty sure it's not obligatory to announce your sexuality when introducing yourself

I would not mind at all! In fact I fail to see how this is any different male ob/gyn that we have in the U.S. there are a lot more men doctors delivering babies than females and they are straight (and married)

Wouldn't give it a second thought - nor would I mind a male midwife tbf.

Not a nurse but I would be perfectly able to differentiate between a penis I needed to examine for a medical reason and a penis attached to a sexual partner. I doubt people think heterosexual female nurses on male wards are trying to sneak a peak; your friends' views need challenging!

Due to complications with my first birth, I had more people look at my fanny in 2 hours, than the rest of my adult life combined. Male and female.
I didn't give a shit as long as they knew what they were doing.

Why anyone would think your being a lesbian would make a difference is ridiculous.

A wonderful male midwife delivered DS2 and he was great. But In any case, I have no idea if any of the female midwives who did DS1 and DS3 were gay - why on earth would it come up?!

I had my dd 24 years ago. My midwife was gay and often spoke about her partner who was also a midwife. Didn't bother me in the slightest. She was a great midwife.

As a patient I’m not interested in your sexuality, but your skills and competence as a midwife. I’m also not sure how this would come into conversation as I certainly don’t introduce myself in my workplace with hi I’ll be looking after you today and I’m gay. Good Luck with your studies

I would not care two hoots and it's appalling your friends vocalised their thoughts and made you feel bad. Disregard! And tell them to keep their negative thoughts to themselves as they are not helpful and do not represent the majority.

I doubt many mothers to be would be concerned. Some feel uncomfortable with men, gay or straight, because of normal concerns about female privacy from men. There are plenty of lesbian midwives! Your friends need a wake up call, they are being weirdos.

Remind them it’s men who prey on women, not lesbians - that’s why we have single sex spaces. We don’t need protecting from the lesbians!!!

It's a homophobic trope that basically says that lesbians are automatically predatory. It's antiquated nonsense.

Go be magnificent as a midwife! Tell anyone that says any different to sod off!

I've honestly member asked whether my midwife was gay. How would that even enter the conversation?

*never, not member