Thread for us classed as mature pregnant ladies

[Sheera1]

Hi all. I wasn't wanted to hijack any threads on hear with specific questions, but wondered if anyone fancied a chat thread for us classed as mature mums to be? Anyone who feels they fit in that box are welcome to join.

I will start. 🌞

I am 41. I have a 10 year old ds and one mmc 3 yrs ago. New partner is reason for the gap.

I was very shocked when I found out as we had assumed that ship had sailed as no joy since mmc. Head was in that camp and was quite a shock to come out of it.

I am 13 weeks based on my scan later Friday. Awaiting NIPT results hopefully today or tomorrow. Been cautious after mmc but hard to not get so attached as the weeks go by.

My first purchase if all ok will be a pregnancy pillow.

Honestly I feel massive already. I am very overweight but was with ds and had a perfect fuss free pregnancy. This time I am so 🤢 and tired and feel just ill from 4pm onwards.

Instead of it easing up, last night I was still feeling 🤢 trying to sleep and was very uncomfortable due to feeling like my womb is massive.

Anyone else feeling like this? Goodness knows how I will be weeks from now. Eeek.

Sorry, that's was supposed to be @Frazzlerock!

Knackered today! Supposed to be working but might have a nap as my brain is clearly not in the game..

Oh I feel exactly the same @PregnantPorcupine. I'm looking forward to finishing work so I can go and have a lie down!

I'm sure everything will be fine @Frazzlerock x

@Frazzlerock @onlyreadingneverposting8 I feel exactly the same. I'm so anxious about not feeling any movements or having a bump yet. I preferred the earlier weeks when I had nausea and really sore boobs to remind me I was pregnant. Now I wake up most days and have a wee panic for the first hour because I don't feel pregnant. I didn't know mmc was even a thing until I started reading posts on mumsnet. Now I'm terrified of it happening to us. I understand it's not that common especially as you get further on (I'm 17+3) but it obviously still happens.... It's 3 weeks until our 20 week scan and I can't get a private scan any earlier than that as all our local places are fully booked. I wish I could just chill out and enjoy my pregnancy 😩

@Crispaddict99 I don't think MMC is that common after 12 weeks, but it is very common before that. I had three MMC myself (all at 9 weeks) over the past 4 years, as well as 1 spontaneous MC at 4 weeks. It really messes with your mind and you lose trust in any pregnancy This one wasn't even planned as we couldn't bear to go through yet another loss and hear those words "there's no heartbeat" yet again.

I think the chances of a MMC are very slim if you've had a successful 12 week scan. Doesn't stop me panicking though!

Can you not get a scan a bit further away?

@Crispaddict99 as @Frazzlerock says! I've become an sodding expert in reading everything. I have a science based degree and have read up on everything over the past couple of years. Second trimester loses are rare (

Anyone else struggling with headaches? I seem to be getting a mixture of sinus headaches and tiredness headaches. At the weekend when DH isn't getting out of bed so early and I know Ive got his help all day I don't get them! But by Friday I'm so tired I have one all day! 😖

Yep, I get headaches too. I think it is mostly tiredness and also staring at my tiny laptop screen all day long for work - I really miss having two screens. I don't get them at the weekends really, just mostly when I'm working M-F. Also backache!

Hi @MD78. That is so exciting! Welcome.

@clairyd121 I was going to ask how long it took for your downs screening NT NHS test they do at 12 weeks as I am still waiting and you are so close to me, but did you say you don't think they did one?

@onlyreadingneverposting8 that is annoying you were meant to be seen in person. I am getting klexane from 28 weeks but have to go and be shown how to inject them. Was all good with your scan?

@Frazzlerock I was £70 for my scan. If it is a more detailed one you have paid for and they can't do it, they should charge a basic scan fee (I know because I asked as like you was worried about it). When is your scan? Mine is tomorrow and my 3rd redraw. I was going to not take the aspirin that apparently might be a reason it fails but apparently it stays in your system for 10 days so no point.

@Frazzlerock what is your job as I am also on a teeny laptop and used to two screens? I work for a bank. X

@Sheera1 I think it might be pretty detailed. I think that is all she offers for this stage in pregnancy. Scan is at 4:30pm on Friday. It'll be a long day!
I sooo hope this redraw works for you. 3rd time lucky? I didn't know that about aspirin. I guess as its a blood thinner it makes sense.

I work in customer tech support for an online platform for file sharing and collaboration. It's all email based and we have an online chat too. Luckily we're not too busy but I still have to be in front of my screen in case anyone needs help - usually idiots who can't work out how to press 'forgot password'! I like having two screens when we have more involved support requests come in so I can pull up various different tools to help me troubleshoot. One laptop screen is ridiculous. Not that I want to go back to the office and do that commute again! I work in London and live in Kent so its a pain in the arse quite frankly!

@Sheera1 yes - everything was fine!! I've had Clexane or tinzaparin (essentially the same thing) in 3 pregnancies before so I just need to be given the script to get it and a letter for my GP to get the repeat. I have started at different times but essentially from first consultants appointment to 6 weeks post natal. This will be the latest I've started but it's all just cautionary and I'm on my feet a lot so I'm not too worried (fewer injections is never bad!!).

@Frazzlerock we are the other side of the crossing. DH works in London but we live in South Essex (last Oyster card stop!).

@Frazzlerock @onlyreadingneverposting8 Thank you both for your replies, that's reassuring to hear. @Frazzlerock I'm in Central Scotland and there's not a lot of choice nearby. Even going further afield, most places are completely booked up until the end of the month. I found a place in Glasgow but their first available appointment is only a few days before my NHS scan (on 23/6) so not worth it. I'll just need to stay positive and keep reminding myself that the odds of something bad happening are low. But as my mum has always said 'I'm a born worrier' xx

@onlyreadingneverposting8 ah near Lakeside?

@Crispaddict99 oh that is frustrating. We will count the days with you! I'm sure it will go quickly - try and keep as busy as poss until the 23rd

@MD78 that’s amazing! Congratulations. Is this your first pregnancy?

I’m 4+5 on my third child, fifth pregnancy. I had two losses last year, an early miscarriage and a missed miscarriage. Very nervous about this one, I’ve even banned sex for a while! I want to do everything we can possibly do to make this one stick

Hey ladies, been a while since I checked in. Great to see a few more ‘oldies’ joining us too

I had my 20wk scan this week. All looking good and baby cooking nicely. Chose not to find out the sex. Got a lovely scan picture but husband couldn’t come in because of Covid. Feeling knackered today, working in my home office and baby is kicking away to keep my company. I’m blown away by just how much I love this wiggly little thing already

Looks like mid-July is peak scan date for a few of you. Will be thinking of you

@Frazzlerock Brentwood area.

My grandparents lived in Kent - Margate. Have lovely memories of holidays with them as a child.

Sorry if I've missed it but is anyone else on this thread in the 3rd trimester? How are your energy levels and how are you coping with daily life? I'm 32 weeks and utterly flipping exhausted . Supposed to be working but needing to nap most afternoons (thankfully boss is quite understanding but I feel like I'm letting the side down a bit). I was reasonably fit pre pregnancy but now I'm barely managing a half an hour walk/trip to the allotment as my daily exercise and getting worried about how I'll cope with labour . Any thoughts on how to improve things?

Or indeed pps who've done this whole pregnancy thing before..

It's normal @PregnantPorcupine! I always think that the third trimester is the bit that make you ready for the birth. Ie you've so TOTALLY had enough of being pregnant, not sleeping and being uncomfortable etc that you're absolutely ready for the birth and newborn bit. My advice would be rest whenever you can. Do whatever you need to do to get you through.

I can't really remember @PregnantPorcupine as the last time I reached full term was 11 years ago I was younger and had more energy back then and don't think I remember being massively knackered. My first one (15 years ago) I was mostly annoyed as he was two weeks late so thought he was never coming out.

I'm deffo more tired this pregnancy and I'm blaming age. I'm only just into the 2nd trimester though so can't comment on 3rd. I am pretty sure it is entirely normal though!

@PregnantPorcupine I’m 32 weeks (today) too.

I’m knackered. I don’t really sleep well at night now - I spend more time back and forth to the loo than I do weeing, so that doesn’t help. I’m starting to feel just generally uncomfortable all the time now, my lady bits hurt, hips ache, have heartburn after everything I eat, getting headaches - just back to generally feeling crap all the time like in the first weeks!

I had my next growth scan booked for the 16th Feb but we sadly lost DH’s gran last week and the date we’ve been given for the funeral is the 16th - not really any choice at the moment you just get what you’re given. So I’ve moved it to the week after and now I’m panicking because it’s meant to be 33 weeks and I’ll be 35 by the time of the new appointment. I’m still convinced there’s going to be something wrong all the time.

I remember the first 12 weeks of pregnancy being hell with anxiety, especially as I had quite a few bleeds, and just being desperate to get to the 12 week scan and all be ok. Which thank god it was - and then I bled again the next day. And then I worried all the way up to the 20 week scan - why wasn’t I feeling movement? Ok I’m feeling something but how can I be sure it’s the baby? Ok maybe it is the baby but it’s the wrong type of movement or not enough or actually I’ve not felt it in a while. My bump isn’t really as big as I’d expect. Etc etc. And then the 20 week scan was fine and I had a real word with myself about trying to just bloody enjoy the fact I’m pregnant after 4 years of fertility struggles. I did a bit better then but have definitely felt the anxiety ramping up again lately.

I actually had a big cry this morning. Partly because there was yet ANOTHER reason why our lounge flooring couldn’t be fitted so we’re still struggling living totally upstairs as no floor in lounge and all furniture crammed into kitchen so it’s unusable (DH can just squeeze to fridge and sink but me and bump don’t fit). But also because I’m just worrying if everything is ok. I’m so concerned by the big measurements at last scan - particularly the stomach - and that they’ve maybe missed gestational diabetes as they’re not testing properly at the moment.

I do feel for anyone worrying about symptoms coming and going. It’s funny looking back now I remember worrying the same and thinking ‘if I wasn’t getting fatter I wouldn’t even know I was pregnant’ but then I also remember LOADS of symptoms so I think it very much depended on the day and I was so busy overanalysing everything.

DH is so chilled about it all too, he just keeps saying ‘it’ll all be fine, you and the baby are fine’ which is good really but sometimes I think he doesn’t get what it’s like to be the one going through it.

*spend more time back and forth to the loo than I do SLEEPING I meant

Hello ladies! I am so glad I found this thread, you have no idea how much your chat has resonated with me. I too am a 'geriatric' mum, 40 years old and nearly 12 weeks preggers with no.2. Had my 1st at 37 and then a MMC in Feb this year. 12 week scan is next week and I'm terrified of getting bad news but whatever will be will be!

Most of my friends had their children in their 20s or early 30s but it just wasnt the right time for me, so finding women like you in the same boat is brilliant! I too am overweight and will be seen by a consultant. I'm hoping I get a nice one cos I dont need someone telling me I'm fat and old - like I dont know already!!! Best of luck everyone with your pregnancies, I'm looking forward to reading all of your updates and sharing good news in the future xx

Hello all.

Just a quick update so soz not replying to people, but hello to everyone.

Had my 3rd bloods taken today for NIPT. The woman said she has never had someone back a 3rd time 🙈.

Like all on here I was panicking all was not well in the run up to it. I have been feeling baby movements and convinced myself they were not as many as I had been feeling. Everything was fine. Baby growing bang on dates 15 weeks 6 days today. Scan pics a but rubbish as kept it's back to us though was lovely DP got to come to his first ever scan that hadn't ended in bad news.

Still no NHS NT results through. Thst is 3 weeks now. 🙄💩.

Hoping all is ok. I just get the feeling these bloods will fail too as I must just be a weird anomaly. 🙈

X