Pregnant After Loss and Dreaming of Rainbows - 4

[Avocuddles]

Thread 4 already! New members very welcome to our friendly and supportive team.

Latest roll call....


@Bellsx. 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Rachael321 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)⁣
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)⁣
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)⁣
@SammiLou2312 22wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)⁣
@Knotemma 21 wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)⁣
@LilMrsS 20wks (due 24/09/20)⁣
@didslysquiddlydoo 20wks 26/09/20)⁣
@TunnocksTcake 19wks (due 26/09/20)⁣
@avocuddles 20wks (due 27/09/20)⁣
@Sunflower1608 20wks with twins (due 28/09/20)⁣
@SunStruck 19wks (due 28/09/20)⁣⁣
@Scout20 19wks (due 29/09/20)⁣
@Littlegoth 20wks (due 30/09/20)⁣
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣⁣
@Treaclepie19 18wks (due 07/10/20)⁣⁣
@Aria2015 10wks⁣
@tmc14 17wks (due 11/10/20)⁣
@Hagster 17wks (due 12/10/20)⁣⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)⁣
@DressingGown87 13wks (due 20/10/20)⁣
@rachelrainbow 11wks (due 1/11/20)⁣
@teaandtantrums90 13wks (due 05/11/20)⁣
@AnxiousLady1 14wks (due 07/11/20)⁣
@Shefliesonherownwings 13wks (due 09/11/20)⁣
@MysteriousSheep 12wks (due 21/11/20)
@Whiffle77 11wks (due 04/12/20)⁣
@MOGMOGMOG85 10wks (due 09/12/20)

[Treaclepie19]

Thats amazing @AnxiousLady1!
We like cybex car seats so im excited to get the Z 😁

[DressingGown87]

@AnxiousLady1 I booked an online virtual appointment with mamas and papas and one with John Lewis. Which I’ve found useful to do the short list. From the 1st week in June my local pram store is doing one to one in store appointments, for a hour. Only you in the shop, with an assistant and they sanitise products between appointments. So booked that too. Haha I work in engineering too, so need to look how it’s all made. 🙈

[TJ88123]

Afternoon ladies. I'm gonna jump ship - we got bad news at the private scan this aft, Mc #3 .. hopefully get it sorted this week but we'll wait a bit coffee trying again/seeing if there's any tests etc offered. Thanks for all your support and I wish you ladies all the best xx

[Hagster]

TJ88123 I'm truly so sorry to hear your news (not tagging you properly in case you don't want to revisit the thread). Sending you so much love and care. Take care ♥️ x

[Avocuddles]

@TJ88123 I am so sorry to hear your sad news. Some time out is never a bad idea and was really helpful for me after my second loss. I hope you can have the investigations / additional support you hope for, and that the journey to your rainbow baby once you're ready doesn't take long.

[tmc14]

TH88123 so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself, & allow those around you to look after you xxx

[Avocuddles]

@Treaclepie19 glad to hear your liked the flip! I was planning on getting the Cloud Z bundle too but it's not classed as compatible with our car so will have to go for the maxi cosi instead which is also an i-size seat and has an insert for lying flat.

@SunStruck I've heard so many rave reviews of the YoYo! They do a newborn pack too so it can be used from birth but think I'll probably skip that and wait instead get it after about six months or when we first take baby on a plane, whichever comes first. I'm hoping to take her on holiday in May or June, before I go back to work, but at this point in time it feels like the days of hopping on a flight for some sunshine are still a long way off....

[AnxiousLady1]

TJ88123 I'm so so sorry to hear this. I didn't want to tag you either, in case you don't want to be drawn back to this thread. Taking time out is a good idea, and hopefully you can get some definitive answers from the relevant tests when you are ready. Please be kind to yourself and take care. xx

[Treaclepie19]

TJ88123 I'm so sorry

[tmc14]

@footprintsintheslow ah thank you for sharing your experience. I think you’re absolutely right if it was one or two nights, I’m just a bit concerned for an induction if it takes days to get going, I just think 4/5 days away is too much if I’m not allowed visitors apart from DH! I also think I’m finding things to stress about 🤦🏻‍♀️

I’m really stuck on pushchairs/prams ... I want one that’s good off road, but also not too bulky for the tube/bus, but that also does parent facing as a pushchair, but that folds down with the seat... haven’t found one that does all four yet. I’m too fussy!

For travel/light weight, I have a mountain buggy nano. Fits in the overhead & cheaper than the babyzen. The weight limit of 20kg is a bit of a stretch, it’s struggling under my 18kg toddler but apart from that I really like it (I’m 5’7”)

We don’t have a car so I confess I’ve just got second hand car seats for the few times we hire one. I know you’re not supposed to get them second hand but I trust the people I’ve bought from when they say they haven’t been in a crash.

[DressingGown87]

Tj88123 so sorry for your loss. I hope you get the answers and tests. Look after yourself.

@tmc14 have you looked at the flip, as this seems to be a lightweight pram. I’ve looked at the Ocarro which is a heavier version, and that had parent and forward facing and folded down with the seat, this was all terrain, but people have said the Flip is good for general parks and country paths. The other ones I’m now considering is the uppababy.

[MrsG3]

🤞🏻 I've done this right! 14 weeks today 😀 hope everyone's doing ok? Haven't managed to catch up on the thread yet as DH is now working from home permanently so been trying to sort out our conservatory 😖


Bellsx. 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Rachael321 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)⁣
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)⁣
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)⁣
@SammiLou2312 22wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)⁣
@Knotemma 21 wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)⁣
@LilMrsS 20wks (due 24/09/20)⁣
@didslysquiddlydoo 20wks 26/09/20)⁣
@TunnocksTcake 19wks (due 26/09/20)⁣
@avocuddles 20wks (due 27/09/20)⁣
@Sunflower1608 20wks with twins (due 28/09/20)⁣
@SunStruck 19wks (due 28/09/20)⁣⁣
@Scout20 19wks (due 29/09/20)⁣
@Littlegoth 20wks (due 30/09/20)⁣
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣⁣
@Treaclepie19 18wks (due 07/10/20)⁣⁣
@Aria2015 10wks⁣
@tmc14 17wks (due 11/10/20)⁣
@Hagster 17wks (due 12/10/20)⁣⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)⁣
@DressingGown87 13wks (due 20/10/20)⁣
@rachelrainbow 11wks (due 1/11/20)⁣
@teaandtantrums90 13wks (due 05/11/20)⁣
@AnxiousLady1 14wks (due 07/11/20)⁣
@Shefliesonherownwings 13wks (due 09/11/20)⁣
@MrsG3 14wks (due 16/11/20)
@MysteriousSheep 13wks (due 21/11/20)
@Whiffle77 11wks (due 04/12/20)⁣
@MOGMOGMOG85 10wks (due 09/12/20)
@footprintsintheslow 5 weeks (due 16/01/21

[Whiffle77]

So sorry for your loss tj88123 - I hope things get sorted for you quickly, and take as much time as you need to heal.

[footprintsintheslow]

@tmc14 how likely is it that induction would take a few days, god that would be awful. I was induced with my two year old and it was pretty fast as they can just up your drip and speed things along, six hours and it was from nothing to full labour.

We have a second hand car seat too which is lie flat and I bought it from an consultant obstetrician so I'm hoping it's safe, we used it twice a month. It's a German make Jane and I've attached a photo. I only wanted the car seat but I bought it with the pram and toddler seat attachment and it's been really handy having a second off road pram that lives in the car.

I can keep my beautiful Silvercross looking good whilst the car one takes a hammering getting in and out of the car and it's been to few festivals too.

We found having a subscription to 'Which' invaluable when choosing baby items. We bought a very very expensive new car seat for 6 Months plus but it was great knowing it was the best on the market from an independent trusted source.

[Avocuddles]

Yes you're on @MrsG3!

Just updating myself to 21 weeks... I've updated the others due the same week too


@Bellsx. 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Rachael321 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)⁣
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)⁣
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)⁣
@SammiLou2312 22wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)⁣
@Knotemma 21 wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)⁣
@LilMrsS 21wks (due 24/09/20)⁣
@didslysquiddlydoo 21wks 26/09/20)⁣
@TunnocksTcake 21wks (due 26/09/20)⁣
@avocuddles 21wks (due 27/09/20)⁣
@Sunflower1608 20wks with twins (due 28/09/20)⁣
@SunStruck 19wks (due 28/09/20)⁣⁣
@Scout20 19wks (due 29/09/20)⁣
@Littlegoth 20wks (due 30/09/20)⁣
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣⁣
@Treaclepie19 18wks (due 07/10/20)⁣⁣
@Aria2015 10wks⁣
@tmc14 17wks (due 11/10/20)⁣
@Hagster 17wks (due 12/10/20)⁣⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)⁣
@DressingGown87 13wks (due 20/10/20)⁣
@rachelrainbow 11wks (due 1/11/20)⁣
@teaandtantrums90 13wks (due 05/11/20)⁣
@AnxiousLady1 14wks (due 07/11/20)⁣
@Shefliesonherownwings 13wks (due 09/11/20)⁣
@MrsG3 14wks (due 16/11/20)
@MysteriousSheep 13wks (due 21/11/20)
@Whiffle77 11wks (due 04/12/20)⁣
@MOGMOGMOG85 10wks (due 09/12/20)
@footprintsintheslow 5 weeks (due 16/01/21

[AnxiousLady1]

Great news on the 14 week mark @ MrsG3!

Happy Monday everyone. I'm feeling a bit more human today. Yesterday was a complete write off. Had a headache and mild nausea from point I got uo until I went to bed again. Did not move off the couch all day...

Updating my weeks also

@Bellsx. 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Rachael321 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)⁣
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)⁣
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)⁣
@SammiLou2312 22wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)⁣
@Knotemma 21 wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)⁣
@LilMrsS 21wks (due 24/09/20)⁣
@didslysquiddlydoo 21wks 26/09/20)⁣
@TunnocksTcake 21wks (due 26/09/20)⁣
@avocuddles 21wks (due 27/09/20)⁣
@Sunflower1608 20wks with twins (due 28/09/20)⁣
@SunStruck 19wks (due 28/09/20)⁣⁣
@Scout20 19wks (due 29/09/20)⁣
@Littlegoth 20wks (due 30/09/20)⁣
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣⁣
@Treaclepie19 18wks (due 07/10/20)⁣⁣
@Aria2015 10wks⁣
@tmc14 17wks (due 11/10/20)⁣
@Hagster 17wks (due 12/10/20)⁣⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)⁣
@DressingGown87 13wks (due 20/10/20)⁣
@rachelrainbow 11wks (due 1/11/20)⁣
@teaandtantrums90 13wks (due 05/11/20)⁣
@AnxiousLady1 15wks (due 07/11/20)⁣
@Shefliesonherownwings 13wks (due 09/11/20)⁣
@MrsG3 14wks (due 16/11/20)
@MysteriousSheep 13wks (due 21/11/20)
@Whiffle77 11wks (due 04/12/20)⁣
@MOGMOGMOG85 10wks (due 09/12/20)
@footprintsintheslow 5 weeks (due 16/01/21

[tmc14]

@footprintsintheslow sorry that is a bit worst case. I was reading about the extreme ends of both induction & section, which probably isn't a good thing to do but I like to be prepared! I've had a couple of friends who had to stay in for the pessary (I got to home when I had it last time), so that was 12 hours for two lots, and then 24 hours on the drip before labour really got started, then another 24 hours before birth. Then a recovery day or two before home. I realise that's probably not the norm, but I guess after last time I'm trying to gauge what could happen. I feel mine would be slow as it would be 39 weeks, whereas last time I went to 42, and I have a family history of spontaneous labour being close to 42 weeks. But I just don't know. Lots of questions for my consultant and lots more back and forth before making a decision I think.

That is a nice car seat. We hire a car about 3 times a year so it's used very rarely. I like the idea of having two pushchairs, one for around town and one to trash in the forest, but storing it would be a pain. I have an old Out and About nipper which I love, it's so easy to push around even when it gets really muddy, but it's on it's last legs and don't think it will survive another one (it was battered when I got it). I don't like that you can't have parent facing when they're first in the seat.

@DressingGown87 I'll check out the flip, although I'm not too bothered about light weight, I'd prefer heavier and sturdy, just not too massive so I can still get on an escalator. I really like the Bumbleride Era, but it's fairly new here so hard to get second hand. I'm lucky in that that's the only thing I have to buy though as we have everything else from first time round, so maybe I'll look at finances, and might just go for a new one with the view that I can sell it on in a few years (I'm self employed, have very little work at the moment and am ineligible for the government help because of the length of time I've been self employed)

[SunStruck]

Congrats @MrsG3 🥰🥰🥰
Updating myself...


@Bellsx. 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Rachael321 26wks (due 20/08/20)⁣
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)⁣
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)⁣
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)⁣
@SammiLou2312 22wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)⁣
@Knotemma 21 wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)⁣
@LilMrsS 21wks (due 24/09/20)⁣
@didslysquiddlydoo 21wks 26/09/20)⁣
@TunnocksTcake 21wks (due 26/09/20)⁣
@avocuddles 21wks (due 27/09/20)⁣
@Sunflower1608 20wks with twins (due 28/09/20)⁣
@SunStruck 21wks (due 28/09/20)⁣⁣
@Scout20 19wks (due 29/09/20)⁣
@Littlegoth 20wks (due 30/09/20)⁣
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣⁣
@Treaclepie19 18wks (due 07/10/20)⁣⁣
@Aria2015 10wks⁣
@tmc14 17wks (due 11/10/20)⁣
@Hagster 17wks (due 12/10/20)⁣⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)⁣
@DressingGown87 13wks (due 20/10/20)⁣
@rachelrainbow 11wks (due 1/11/20)⁣
@teaandtantrums90 13wks (due 05/11/20)⁣
@AnxiousLady1 14wks (due 07/11/20)⁣
@Shefliesonherownwings 13wks (due 09/11/20)⁣
@MrsG3 14wks (due 16/11/20)
@MysteriousSheep 13wks (due 21/11/20)
@Whiffle77 11wks (due 04/12/20)⁣
@MOGMOGMOG85 10wks (due 09/12/20)
@footprintsintheslow* 5 weeks (due 16/01/21

[Anon20something]

Got a letter in the post for an induction date (already?! I’m only 21 weeks but the consultant knows how anxious I am and said she’d give me a date but could change !!) but it’s for September 10th, a year to the day of my daughters due date and her funeral 😭

[footprintsintheslow]

Oh god @Anon20something how do you feel about that?

[Knotemma]

@Anon20something that's a tough date, I'm sure if you have a chat with the consultant they can maybe look at changing it? Obviously depending on how you feel, but I think I would struggle to have the mental strength to cope with labor on that anniversary. Sending you lots of positive thoughts today

[Anon20something]

@footprintsintheslow @Knotemma thank you ladies. I honestly don’t know how I feel, one part of me is thinking I can’t do that, my heart will be with lily that day and it’s just too hard, the other part of me feels like we’ll be coming full circle and maybe it’s Lily’s way of being there with me saying it’s okay and that she’ll watch out for us? Just all feels very real now and I’m just terrified of something happening to him and having to do all that again 😔

[Knotemma]

@Anon20something that's totally understandable and you're allowed to not be sure. I know how important it is to you that Lily is part of this pregnancy and you're allowed to take the time to think it over and not rush. If you can draw strength from it being a day that is so intrinsically Lily then that is a wonderful thing. But if you need to have that day as a time to hold her close in your heart and her be your main focus then that's important too. I'm sure that it's also been a shock, so take your time, talk to people about it and know that you can make this decision xx

[tmc14]

@Anon20something crikey that is organised, my friend is due a section in the next two weeks as her baby is footling breech & she doesn’t have a date yet! It’s very hard, I think it could either be too hard, or as you say, quite cathartic. I’d sit with it for a couple of weeks and see where your head is, whether as you think it over you’d prefer to change it. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind, and remember these things all need your say so as well, so you are allowed to say that doesn’t work for you x

[AnxiousLady1]

@Anon20something Definitely give yourself time to think about it. I'll admit that when I first read your post my immediate thought went to how it was almost a sign. You've mentioned how Lily is very much a part of this pregnancy, and being induced on that date seems poignant in a way. But of course it is whatever you feel comfortable with and allow yourself time to think it over. xxx