The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #2 "The Penguin Huddle " 🐧🐧🐧

[InDreamland]

Hello Ladies

Starting a new penguin huddle thread as the first one is getting very full. This is for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

Getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

Let's start the roll call:

Me:
No living children, 3rd pregnancy, currently 8+3. Had early scan at 7 weeks that showed baby measuring right for 7w with a heartbeat. Got another early viability scan booked in for this Tuesday at 8+6. Really scared I've lost this one again.
2 previous pregnancies ended in mmc at 12+3 (baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) in July 2018 and mc (CP but hate that term) in November 2018. Before then had been TTC for 5 years so our journey has been 6 years since starting to TTC.

@KnitKitty @Yukka @rubyroot @Bluebelltulip @MyHeartisBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @Amanda81 @boboelephant @Newbie21

Who have I missed?

Sorry I've been a bit quiet. Anxiety has been high and I had my 40th birthday this week so been busy.

@InDreamland great news on the scan!

Hugs to everyone else-I'm so behind I haven't yet managed to go back and catch up with everyone!

Amanda81 38 - 18+2 - EDD 27/12/19
Beaglemum93* - 25 - 19+0 EDD 22/12/19
Frillyfarmer - 29 - 9+1 EDD 29/02/19
Melpops36 38- 21+3 EDD 5/12/2019
Laney79- 40 - 16+6 EDD 6/1/2020 (but elective section so likely to be 30/12/19)

@Beaglemum93 I've bathed it a couple of times to soothe the itching but it's definitely nothing stuck - just another crap reaction. Will call my GP tomorrow to see what he says I can have. I was on Montelukast which was really keeping it at bay but gave it up a few months ago after first MC.

@Amanda81 I know, what are the chances!

Hi all!

Great news on the scans @InDreamland, @Amanda81, @Newbie21 and @Beaglemum93! Love your restraint on not finding out the sex @Newbie21 and your DS sounds so lovely!! @InDreamland I'm so pleased for you but sorry you still feel the anxiety. I like your envelope idea! I hope your next scan brings some reassurance.

Welcome @Rmac90! Glad you decided to come over! We're all slightly neurotic but a lovely bunch!

Hope you're doing ok ahead of tomorrow @sadtoday21 and @rubyroot. Will be thinking of you xxx

Glad the bleeding has eased up @Russkispy.

@moonpeace hope you're ok lovely. The anxiety just never seems to fully fuck off does it?! But great to hear you're 14 weeks! I feel like that has gone quickly but sure you don't!

@Bluebelltulip Lovely to hear you're feeling good! I can feel a fair bit of movement despite anterior placenta (although apparently it's to my right and I only feel the pops/bubbles to my left) I do panic if I feel I haven't felt anything. Tonight I tried a flashlight at my tummy and it worked!! Instant movement which made me feel better! Anyway, I hope you get the scan date sorted and manage to keep this feeling of positivity.

@Frillyfarmer your poor eye! I hope you get some relief tomorrow.

Lovely to hear from you @Laney79. Sorry you've been anxious. Is your elective section date definite or just your calculation? I haven't been given one yet, have a few appointments for September and one is with a consultant so maybe they will tell me more then? I know they usually do them around 39 weeks but i would like to know when it would be since it will be so soon after Xmas.

On that note...

Amanda81 38 - 18+2 - EDD 27/12/19
Beaglemum93* - 25 - 19+0 EDD 22/12/19
Frillyfarmer - 29 - 9+1 EDD 29/02/19
Melpops36 38- 21+3 EDD 5/12/2019
Laney79- 40 - 16+6 EDD 6/1/2020 (but elective section so likely to be 30/12/19)
MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue - 36 - 17+2 EDD 3/01/19 but having an elective section so likely to be around 27th Dec

Oh forgot to say - I have been experiencing pain in my inner thighs at the top. It's sharp and feels like a pulled muscle and I get it when I walk up stairs or roll over in bed. It's worse at night. Anyway, a bit worried as a quick google search points to SPD which I know is not harmful but can become quite painful! Never had this in my DD pregnancy. I have my midwife app on Wednesday so will ask them but wondered if anyone else had had this?

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue Thanks so much for thinking of me! I didn’t know about the flashlight thing, that’s really cool! Sorry I don’t have any experience with the thigh pain, but hope you can get it seen to right away.

I think I’m too scared to add my due date to the list just yet, but I really love the idea @Amanda81! It’s great to remember where everyone is in the process. I just feel it’s too soon for me still and I have vague fears about being too concrete about this pregnancy, since it may not work out. Feeling some anxiety for tomorrow afternoon, but had a nice hike today to take my mind off of it.

Good luck @rubyroot! Thinking of you Xxx.

@Beaglemum93 great scan, when is your anomaly scan?

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue thanks I've continued some positivity today and bought a toy for this baby while I was buying a present for my cousin's new baby. I had spd in DD2's pregnancy, physio really helped, I've been doing the exercises I was given this time too and only felt a small amount of pain but last time I was hurting a lot by now. Definitely get your midwife to refer you.

My anomaly scan is on Friday @Bluebelltulip. I'll be 19+5.

Melpops36 38 - 21+3 EDD 5/12/2019
Beaglemum93 - 25 - 19+0 EDD 22/12/19
Amanda81 38 - 18+2 - EDD 27/12/19
MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue - 36 - 17+2 EDD 3/01/19 but having an elective section so likely to be around 27th Dec
Laney79 - 40 - 16+6 EDD 6/1/2020 (but elective section so likely to be 30/12/19)
Bluebelltulip - 29 - 16+3 EDD 9/1/2020 likely induction 2 weeks earlier
Frillyfarmer - 29 - 9+1 EDD 29/02/20

I hope people don't mind but I reordered the list to due date order.

Thanks @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @sadtoday21. Good luck to you too @sadtoday21- bet you're feeling as anxious as me. I feel slightly sick too, god knows if that's the hormones or the anxiety!

Thank you ladies. Sorry not to tag you all but I'm exhausted today. So angry with DH. He went out last night,, I asked him to not be late and not to drink too much because the smell of alcohol, well stench more than smell, makes me feel so sick it's unbearable. He rolls in after 2am hiccuping and absolutely reeking of booze. Tried to get into bed, woke me up and I told him where to go. So he goes downstairs, then comes back up a couple of hours later, wakes me up and tries to get into bed again. I'm so so so mad at him. So basically I've spent today feeling really unwell and exhausted and sleeping most of the day.

@Bluebelltulip glad you're feeling positive. 12 week scan is in 9 days when I'm supposed to be 11+6.

@Russkispy glad the bleeding has started to slow down. Hope it was just implantation bleeding.

@Beaglemum93 congrats on a good scan. Lovely picture there.

@Frillyfarmer your allergic reaction sounds dreadful, hope you can see GP and get something for it. Hope it goes down quickly.

Melpops3638 - 21+3 EDD 5/12/2019
Beaglemum93- 25 - 19+0 EDD 22/12/19
Amanda8138 - 18+2 - EDD 27/12/19
MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue- 36 - 17+2 EDD 3/01/19 but having an elective section so likely to be around 27th Dec
Laney79- 40 - 16+6 EDD 6/1/2020 (but elective section so likely to be 30/12/19)
Bluebelltulip- 29 - 16+3 EDD 9/1/2020 likely induction 2 weeks earlier
InDreamland - 39 - 10+4 EDD 19/02/19 (TBC at dating scan if baby still alive)
Frillyfarmer- 29 - 9+1 EDD 29/02/20

Lots of winter babies!

Hi everyone adding myself to the list
Melpops3638 - 21+3 EDD 5/12/2019
Beaglemum93- 25 - 19+0 EDD 22/12/19
Amanda8138 - 18+2 - EDD 27/12/19
MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue- 36 - 17+2 EDD 3/01/19 but having an elective section so likely to be around 27th Dec
Laney79- 40 - 16+6 EDD 6/1/2020 (but elective section so likely to be 30/12/19)
Bluebelltulip- 29 - 16+3 EDD 9/1/2020 likely induction 2 weeks earlier
InDreamland - 39 - 10+4 EDD 19/02/19 (TBC at dating scan if baby still alive)
Tinatsarina- 29 - 9+4 EDD 26/02/20
Frillyfarmer- 29 - 9+1 EDD 29/02/20

Hello, tentatively checking in. Only 4+1 today, but feeling positive.

Had 3 mc this year and 1 last year so surely I'm due a sticky bean this time! Need to call EPU tomorrow as still haven't had an appt through for gynaecology about the rmc's. In the mean time DP is ecstatic and letting me nap all I need to (which is already a lot 😂😴)

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue no definite date yet for my section. I had one agreed during my second pregnancy (day before the scan that showed another loss) and on the letter it says they are done at 39 weeks so that's my calculation.

Seeing my consultant on Wednesday so hoping I'll find out more then. X

Thank you all for your kind words. I'm still feeling over the moon to have got this far and seeing baby dancing around was one of the best experiences of my life. OH is so happy and keeps doing impressions of it.

@rubyroot thanks for the reassurance regarding c-section. I've had three abdominal surgeries, two of which were open surgeries so I'm not keen on going through another one, but whatever gets baby into this world the safest is okay with me and I know I'll cope with it. It's particularly reassuring to know that an emergency c-section went smoothly. Hopefully I'll have advanced warning if it's looking likely so I should be as prepared as possible.

@moonpeace if it helps; I've had no constipation so far. I might not go to the loo every day as I normally would, but I still go every other day; and a lot of my bowel movements have been loser - particularly during the hot weather we had.
So sorry you had the panic with the toilet blood situation.

@Amanda81 Congratulations on the scan and good progress.

@Newbie21 Great news about the harmony test and what a lovely scan photo! Congrats! And no... nothing like a puppy!! haha! I think girl!

@DuvetCatterpillar sorry your anxiety has been bad. Huge hugs xxx

@UnicorsandRainbows1 Yey! Due-date buddies!!!

@Rmac90 Welcome. So sorry for your losses but I'm glad everything is going well with this current pregnancy so far. Fingers and toes crossed for you!

@sadtoday21 gardening is safe so long as you wear gardening gloves and wash your hands really well after.

@InDreamland Congratulations on the great scan! I'm so happy for you. Are you letting it sink in a bit yet?

@Bluebelltulip Great the hear you were feeling better the other day. Are you feeling alright today?

@Beaglemum Yey! Another great scan and photo! This is amazing, seeing everyone's good news.

Damn, I haven't had time to catch up on the whole thread, so apologies... I will try to catch up this evening.
I hope you all have a good day. Hugs to all

Well that was bloody nerve wracking. Had a loose pooh today as well so convinced all was over.
Flicker of a heartbeat visualised. They measured 5 weeks 4, but I think its more like 6 weeks 3. I remember they measured similar with my little boy, but by 12 weeks my dates were correct. So I'm trying to not overthink the measurements as I know they can be inaccurate at this stage.
Anyhow I'm relieved but anxious for the next stage, particularly after seeing a very poorly baby at 13 weeks previously. Fingers crossed. Hoping its good news for you too @sadtoday21 x

Great news @rubyroot - they did the same to me I.e saw a HB at what I thought was 6+4 and date be 5 weeks something. It had all caught up by the scans I had the following weeks.

Good luck today @sadtoday21

Welcome @CodlingMoth sorry to hear about your previous losses.

@InDreamland did you talk to your DH about it later in the day? How are you today?

@Knitkitty got a day to my self for thesis writing as DD is doing an extra nursery day, feeling productive and positive.

@rubyroot glad the scan went well, dates can be all over the place at this point. Are you having any other scans between this one and the 12 week one?

@rubyroot that is excellent news, congratulations! Very happy for you. Hoping you can relax for a day at least :). When’s the next one?

Thanks @Amanda81! My appointment is in two hours and I’m starting to feel extremely anxious. DH might have to drag me in there. I feel like my world is going to fall apart again in just a few hours and I don’t know how to cope with it. Sorry, just really not feeling positive...I don’t know what’s worse, not knowing what’s going on or the anxiety of going into that scan room. Anyway, just have to do it and get it over with.

@Knitkitty I'm definitely having ten week as will be having harmony esp after t21 diagnosis last Sept.

I think I might have one in two weeks time as I'm not sure I can wait until ten weeks.

Awwww @sadtoday21 I'm sorry you're so anxious. I've been through the exact same thing today, but my scan was at nine. Couldn't sleep. I really hope it's positive for you. God its so bloody worrisome. My heart was beating so fast. Then they sat me in a consultation and asked loads of qs. I was like just get on with the fucking scan!!

Take some deep breaths @sadtoday21 - I know the feeling and it is awful. Try to think of the positives and that the likelihood is that all will be well.

Hope your scan goes well @Sadtoday21, you can do this.