Pregnancy after m/c (part 7), true hand-holding and support along the road...

[Uki]

Thought I'd start this in honour of Purple's effort so far, hope you don't mind Purple I liked this title best.

Welcome to our shiny new thread

Have you seen the still obsessed with harry potter thread yet Mumpbump? It is full of fellow HP nuts theorising about book 7 and drooling over some of the actors in the films! We already managed to fill one thread, this is the second one!

Ladies - thank you so much for your replies and support. I am heeding your wisw words = the important thing is bean is there and is growing. Probably my calculations are a few days out and their caluclations are a few days out and bam, 12 days out from LMP

This sounds so petty but I was ecstatic to be past my 6+5 "danger" day by what I thought was over a fortnight. Now its only 3 days in the past and still seems scarily close. Anyway, positive, positive thoughts!!

Glimmer very interesting theory...There are indeed non-identicals on my mum's side. I'm sure I read somewhere that actually loads of pg start off as two and one is just "absorbed" back into body?? Who knows, weird......

It's damn fine that Mc is back isn't it? Can't believe we're only going to cross by one day though!

I'm off on holiday to France tomorrow morning and I haven't been begun packing for me / DH / DS. We're off to Brittany which specialises in.....various delicious unpasterised cheeses and seafood...sigh. Lots of steak frites for me then. And are croissants and hot chocolate highly recommended for pg women??

I'm back 22 July and then another scan 3 weeks today on 25th

Thank you for your advice and I will be thinking of you all while I'm away
Love BB

It's damn fine that Mc is ck isn't it?

Sorry delete repeated last line - MrsMc am not obsessed stalker with candle lit vigil to you in my wardrobe.....honest

Just dipping in and out as too worried to talk about pg for fear it will all end too soon.Plus laid up with spd.

Sending love and hugs to all those on here
x

Hi Girls

You lot can talk!! I turn my back for a few days and I can't keep up!! i need to get on maternity leave, so I can spend more time on here!

I hope everyone is well - I've haven't really had time to digest what everyone has been up to! sorry, bit snowed under at work, but wanted to pop in and say hello to you all!

basil my scans were also over a week out than my dates, although mine were the other way. I know that I didnt' have sex when they said that i must have done, as I was still in mid-mc at Christmas and wasn't letting DH anywhere near me! however, "scans are so accurate" they said, so I have to go with their dates! Don't they realise that we might actually know our bodies?! i do hope that there is a logical reason for your date mix up too! Twins is a good suggestion for such a high HCG level.

Glad to feel that everyone is so positive at the moment.

I too am so sorry about Lissie - there has been no more news from her then?

take care all
xxx

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I imagine lissie is back on the ttc after m/c thread. She's posted on another thread started by paulaplumpbottom who is now pg after 3 m/c and apparently got told she had to wait for a 4th before she would get referred. Makes me see red. Will read through and post properly in a minute...

Basil - have a great time in France and good luck with your scan if you don't manage to post on here before then!

Hello to Fettle, Firststar and Chocolatepeanut. Fingers still well and truly crossed for you, Peanut. I know the time drags now, but if you get through the first 12 weeks, it will suddenly seem to fly... Lots of positive thought heading your way...

Not much to report here. I said to dh this morning that I would be into the "third trimester" next Monday (bit of a joke from my pg with ds) and that I would therefore probably need more help and support with him as I was finding this pg very tiring. His reaction (a joke, I think) was "What's in it for me" to which my response was "Well, how about a small baby in about three months time?" Can't believe that time is passing so quickly now and I am starting to believe that there really will be a lo arriving shortly!!!

hi all, just waiting for the doula to come around to see me ... have felt totally exhausted this week - had to go to the hospital for physio on Tuesday and hydro yesterday - they keep telling me to take it easy, yet it's a 20 minute hobble from the car park to the physio department!

Will let you know all the details from doula appt. later ...

Good morning all

basil- pretty sure my first scan was out a couple of days too, and now can't even remember exactly. Fabtastic you saw HB though.

Mrs Mc i know what you mean about the crossing over of clothes, you have to find all the stretchy things in your wardrobe, although i reakon 3 months is a good time to start flaunting it, it's cute bump stage. I remember most people guessing me at 8 weeks due to the size of my chest, there was no hiding it in summer.

Mump- wow you are getting on -third trimester yay, I gather you don't know the sex yet, so you will be gettting very excited i imagine.

Firstar -are you sleeping in and enjoying ML? I've managed to watch 3 movies because it is still raining here.

Well I've finally managed to catch a cold so off to bed shortly feeling so stuffed up and tired, and oh boy does sneezing constantly and being pg affect your pelvic floor, or should i say what pelvic floor.

just posting my good wishes for mrsmcjnr.. so pleased you got your BFP, makes me feel all warm inside.
As you may have noticed Ellen was born last month, pictures on my profile, seems like an age we were together on the TTC topic

Hello. Have been lurking but not posting.
Cold is getting better and I am off for a long weekend in Germany. to everybody.

Thanks Mumpbump you sound so lovely and positive!

Beckle ? love the name change and the very positive vibe from you it is so lovely, such a different Beckle from the one I first met! get yourself some nice comfy mat trousers ? I?d find the hair bobble fastening trick way too uncomfy!

Basil ? hey you! How are you today? Feeling any better? You are still past that danger date hon. I see you are now on holiday that will help enormously, I felt so much better after some R&R Lots of hot choc now, you need the calcium because you are on holiday, the time will fly until your next scan and what a difference you will see! have fun!

Chocpeanut ? hang in there hon, sorry about the SPD .

Hey Fettle

Firsty I like that idea of saying goodbye to the first trimester, I feel like I have been in it for the whole year so far (well, I have for most of it!!) I want to get to the blooming bit!

Ejt ? hope the appointment went well, let us know!

Hope you feel better soon Uki

Natty ? OMG can?t believe I missed it!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! both of your babies are gorgeous ? what a lovely pair! Ellen is so cute with all her hair! how are you feeling? Did it all go well? Over the moon for you, really I am!

Enjoy your weekend Glimmer, glad the cold is getting better

Had a bit of an odd day really had my first appointment with the Obstetric Consultant this morning. I liked her manner . She explained really what it means to be a high risk case and all the monitoring and tests we?d get and then we hit an issue. DH and I had decided that we didn?t want the screening tests (i.e. the Double Test) because of the related stress and the fact that we would not want an Amnio due to the risks and due to the fact that we would be unlikely to terminate whatever the outcome so we?d rather not know. We thought our minds were clear. She explained that in all the scans, issues would be exactly what she was looking for and she?d find it hard not to tell us the things she saw. Made us realise that diagnostic tests are one thing and screening is another. So we have decided to pay for a nuchal (£190!!) next week so that we have a much better indicator for Down?s than we would with the Double Test alone and then we?ll deal with anything that comes up on the scans if it happens. We?ve got them at 14, 20, 24, 28, 32, 36 weeks etc ? we?ll know this baby quite well I think when he/she arrives we don?t want to know the sex, do you think our curiosity will get the better of us?! Spent all afternoon reading up on testing instead of working

MrsMc, delighted you are back, you've been missed. Very sweet of you to be worried. I'm doing okay.
I wrote a letter to my HR dept complaining about stinginess of their maternity pay and I have a meeting with our HR manager next Thursday. Apparently it is classed as a grevience Don't know what to think!!
Basil, so sorry that you have been so worried, but I was also told that early scans can be out by as much as 5 days either side. My first scan was about 4 days out, when I had my dating scan it put me back to my original EDD based on my last period.

sorry ... apologising in advance for a completely me, me, me post....

Am a bit and extremely worried this morning. My dad had a heart attack just after New Year, and was recovering really well, until yesterday, when he took my sister to see her doctor, had a 'funny turn' (my mum's term!), passed out, and lost so much control of his bodily functions that he wet himself. He was blue-lighted down to the local hospital, and has been taken in to be assessed. The docs are saying they don't think it's his heart again - but until he had an absolutely massive heart attack in A&E in January, they were saying it wasn't his heart then either! He's also told my mum he's been having pains in his chest again that he hadn't told her about - just like before ...
Mum has phoned me this morning just to let me know that there's no news - but I'm really worried.
If you're the praying kind, please pray for him.

It's also p1ssing me off that my sister has managed to turn it around so that it's all about her - she's beating herself up about the fact that dad had taken her to the doctor, and blaming herself for bringing it on - honestly - my feeliing there is that is was probably the best place, other than A&E itself, for it to have happened!
Why does she always have to be such a drama queen?

Going to go back and wait for more news ... see you later.

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Thanks BouncingTurtle Let me know how you get on with HR. My firm only pay statutory, I think that is really mean and would love to challenge it. Doubt I?d get anywhere though.

Hey Ejt ? so sorry to hear about your Dad I will be praying for him and you hon. I hope he feels much better soon. Don?t forget that that wee one needs you and so do take it easy. Try to ignore your sister (your hormones won?t be helping) sending hugs.

Firsty ? thanks hon! As I said above, I just get basics too on the mat pay front. Last year I would have got 6 months on full pay ? trying not to think about that!!!

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Hi all!
MrsMc - thank you for saying such a nice thing about me! I definitely feel a different person than I was when I first spoke to you. Last year must be the worst I have ever been through and I was in a very bad place when I found Mumsnet in Feb. Talking to people on here (you and the other lovely ladies on the pg after m/c thread especially) really helped me sort my head out. I remember waking up one day and just feeling more like myself again, a week or so later I had my first 'normal' period for over a year, then I o'vd and now I am 15 weeks pg! Without mumsnet I think it would have taken me much longer to recover from last year and without the wonderful girls on this thread I don't know how I would have gotten through the worries of the last 15 weeks! sorry didn't mean to ramble on so much!
I'm glad that you liked your consultant although big boo hoo at the amount of testing you'll be having - it will all be worth it in the end though! When it comes to extra tests and things I always think that it is good to be prewarned, I too would not have an amnio but would like to be prepared if I was going to have an extra special baby. at all those scans! I agree it would be hard not to find out the sex with all those opportunities! I found out with DS2 and will again with this one if poss but I wanted to keep DS1 as a surprise and it was a lovely feeling!
Ejt, big for you hun, you sound like you need them. Firststar is right, your Dad is in the right place and hopefully they will be able to find out what is wrong and treat it. As for your Sister, ignore her. Drama Queens hate being ignored!
Firststar, how are you doing? Not long to go now!
I went and had my Triple Test done again today. They have to weigh you when you have it done but I was a bit to find out I have put on about 1/2 stone since last Thursday!!! Wonder if it has anything to do with the tub of Haagen-Dazs I ate on Sunday???

Hello everyone, just thought i would pop in.
EJT - thinking of you and your dad, what a worry. He is in the best place now, I hope they get to the bottom of what ever caused his "funny turn" as quickly as possible. You keep calm and think nice thoughts and tell your dad to do the same, he should try to take it easy and not let himself worry too much.
beckle - yep, i got weighed too, I've put on a stone since I fell pg, I think this is okay though, because from what I read the average gain over preganacy is about 2st. So I'd better start watching my eating! When did they say you'll get your results by? Mine will take 2 weeks.
I only get the statutory maternity pay, don't know if I'll get any more but I do know someone else has also put a complaint in. So you'll never know....

Bouncing - I think that 'average weight gain' stuff is rubbish! I put on well over 4 stone with DS1 and probably nearly 3 with DS2 - most of it was water thankfully and I was left with about 10 lbs to lose after they were born (7 lbs of which stuck around until after I stopped breastfeeding both times). I think I will get my results in about 2-3 weeks by letter, they will phone if any problems were detected. Good luck with your maternity pay! Hopefully you'll get a bit more! I earn under the lower earnings limit as I only do 2 nights a week so am not actually entitled to anything from my company but can claim statutory from the government I think. £90 per week or 90% pay (whichever is lower) I think - works out I will only be about £15 down a month so not too bad.

hurray - dad has been discharged from hospital ... have spoken to him, and he's fine, but basically ok.

They don't think it's his heart, they think that his spray thing (that he has to use if he has any chest pain) lowered his blood pressure too much, hence why he passed out.

Phew ...

Thank you for your lovely messages - am going to go to bed for a bit, as I didn't sleep too well last night ... a mixture of worrying about dad, and ds being very clingy and upset in the night - he ended up in bed with me - dh was relegated to ds's bed!

take care all,
ejt xx

I know Firsty!

Hey Becklepheonixbirdy you are very welcome. I know exactly how you feel, I wouldn?t be the well adjusted, balanced, calm lady that I am without this site, it really has kept me sane. Good luck with the test results hon

Hope you get some joy Bouncing

Ejt ? that?s great news sleep well hon.

Hi everyone
Had a bad couple of days with SPD and whilst lying in bed been worrying about movements not starting yet.

So I rang hosp today and went to EPU where they reassured me by finding heartbeat and telling me that the placenta is at the front and therefore cushioning any kicks.

The trip there was awful and by the time I got in the hosp i convinced myself the baby was dead.

Wish I could fast forward this pregnancy as I dont think nerves will make it

ejt - phew! So glad your Dad is home and okay, hope you get a lovely night's sleep tonight x
ChocolatePeanut, sorry your SPD had been bad but glad babe is okay. It is such a worry isn't it? Previous loss really spoils pregnancy. IKWYM about wanting to fast forward time, I feel the same some days. I don't think I will truly relax and believe it's real until I hold my baby in my arms in December.