M.I.L wants to be called Mamma!!

[Sarah1087]

As it says

I don't understand what is wrong with old fashioned Nanan or nana my mum will be being called Nana.
Mamma to me is the definition of mummy I've told Fiance I'm not happy with this, he said what about Mommar but im not happy with that.

Without sounding cruel and not doing into everything personal at the min I feel as though the whole situation is being monopolised this is my first baby after suffering with infertility and I stand by myself in thinking I've every right to disagree with this and even ask for This not to happen.

Does anyone agree with me ?

My grandmothers were Momma and Mamma. Both pronounced mom-mar, very distinct from Mamma pronounced ma-ma. I think it's a regional thing.

so just taught my DD to call her grandma

Yep -no need to spell it out, actions speak louder than words

I like great ducks idea Where does DH get Moomar from?

Shortened to Moo obviously

In my case she's also kitted out an entire nursery at her house.

I just read this as knitted an entire nursery at her house. Now that would be a proper Grandma kind of thing to do

In my case she's also kitted out an entire nursery at her house

But it at her house...why is this annoying you? is it nicer than yours?

well yes it's her house, but it's not her baby! Some people just railroad over everyone nad everything

Is this a thing in Yorkshire then?

Not the bit I’m from (Doncaster/Rotherham). Gran all the way here.

And the problem with kitting out a full nursery in her house is the implication that the newborn will be spending enough nights there (as opposed to at home with its own parents) for that to be a financially worthwhile endeavour.

My mum bought a travel cot, so that there is somewhere for DS to sleep when we, as in the whole family, stay over. The travel cot is set up in our room. There is no overstepping there, it’s a thoughtful gesture.

In contrast, it sounds like this MIL is intending the baby to stay over regularly in her nursery, with the parents either in a different room or preferably not there at all, while she plays at being a mother again.

But even though someone kits out a nursery it doesn't mean anything does it? They aren't going to have the baby there unless the parents agree!

The OP's MIL hasn't kitted out the nursery in her own home I don't think, it was another posters MIL.

I keep hearing people say certain terminology are a 'Midlands thing' and it always amuses me.

I'm from the midland my grandmother was my nan, my mum is Nan to my dcs and my DH's Mum is Gran.
Never heard of anyone calling a grandmother 'mamma'.

Glad you are standing your ground Op

Just say no. That Mama or any derivation of that word is reserved for baby's Mama...you.
Tell her Gran/Granny/Nan/Nanny is up for grabs. Otherwise you will be calling her by her first name and instructing baby to do so also.

I'm granny to my elder 3 and at the moment I'm Mumumumum to my youngest. My MiL is Nanna to my children and grandchildren. I really don't see why she would want to be called Mamma, how about meemaw as Sheldon calls his grandmother?

My DS called his grandma Manmar, he struggled to call her grandma like DD did. It kind of stuck, FIL and DH call her Manmar. Ironically DS called her Grandma last week for the first time
To be honest, yes it sounds a bit like Mama however I am happy in the knowledge that MIL would never try to cross that boundary, so it doesn't really bother me.

I know of a family where the MIL is Mamar. Pronounced like mom-mar.

For a time my DD called her Granma ‘Manmar’ as she couldn’t pronounce Grandma.

I thought that this family was the same, a mispronunciation that had stuck. But no, the Mil asked to be called Mamar. I wouldn’t be overly keen, it’s far too close to Mama.

What about Gramma instead?

Absolutely no fucking way

ExtraordinRy how aggressive people are about stuff like this- when the OP hasn’t even mentioned it to her mil!

I like meemaww that could sit with me.

I've not mentioned anything yet and plus I think that's my finance place as its his mum and I'll end up looking like the bad guy. But I'll see how it goes and thank you for your support it has made me feel that I am
Not being irrational like I was first made out to feel

NannyOgg - it wasn’t meant to be funny, our English teacher was just very old school and thought that being called Nanny was not ‘proper’.
Apparently the queen is called ‘Gary’ by the princes as one of them couldn’t say granny. It doesn’t matter what your grandchildren call you as long as it is a term of endearment and affection.

Extraordinary how aggressive people are about stuff like this

I know, makes you wonder what they're like with their own MILs!

Isn't moomar and moopah from Black Books?
My mil thought she was too young to be Gran but was happy with Nana. My late mum was Granny.

No one but me would be mama or mum or anything like. She should pick an appropriate name!

Same as @Dandybelle for us. My mil is mam-mar as her first GC couldn't say grandma. So now all of them do. It was very organic and she didn't choose it, it's quite endearing.

Probably would have been a bit if she'd chosen it herself though.

I wouldn't leave it to your kid to decide. Your kid will call her what they are taught - MiL will call herself mamma in this case. You need to step in to teach her nanny ASAP

I agree with sour patch. Your need to tell her straight. If she doesn’t like nana/granny whatever then they can call her Sandra or whatever her name is. YOU are her mum.

Bloody weirdo. And your DH needs to be on your side and respect your wishes. How would he feel if your father wanted to be called Daddy?

There’s that aggression again. Why?

Your dc will call her whatever you refer MIL as, and will then probably muddle it into cute toddler speak. So its best to decide on what your starting point is, and not just go with the flow