F***ity f*** f***, is 49 too old for a child?

[Salubrious]

I never swear but jeez I’m in shock. DH and I never had kids due to my endometriosis and in the end we just gave up...we do however have two beautiful step-children who I class as my own flesh and blood.

Today I found out I am pregnant. Missed my period and knew something was up as it’s like clockwork. Decided take a test just to rule it out and both tests had a big blue line! My DH is away on business and I’ve spent the day in a daze....I’m worried I’m too old and there’ll be a mass of medical complications...please someone tell me this can work out....

And another PS to Priscilla - one of my very good friends is married to a man who was born when his mum was 48. He was a much loved menopause baby who kept his parents very young. And he had two much older siblings who still act as extra 'parents' but more fun ;).

Congratulations!!! This is a lovely post! Don’t panic, make a GP appointment and hopefully they can put your mind at ease.

Congratulations! I hope things go well.

Pricilla my dear lovely kind father was 48 when I was born, he was an amazing patient kind man and his later years gave him endless patience. He lived to see my children and passed away at 94.

Being older as a parent must have its difficulties but also can bring other benefits to bear. You have a very limited perspective and well I feel sorry for you.

Congratulations.

As I'm sure you're aware, it will be a high risk pregnancy. GP first thing tomorrow. Yours will not be as straight-forward as a 22 year old for e.g. There are extra associated risks to baby and yourself.

I wish you a very happy and healthy pregnancy, birth and new-born.

Congratulations! Come over to the antenatal clubs board "due in august" there's a few of us older mum's on that too

How fantastic.. I am well jealous!

Many congratulations. As others have said, your body doesn't think you are too old.

You can do it Op! I had a surprise baby at 45 and felt fine and it's all worked out great. (Being treated like a 'geriatric mum to be' by the medical establishment was a bit of a nuisance though!!)

Ignore Priscilla who sounds like she comes from a world where 18 year olds give birth to children who then do the same at 16/17/18 and so on each generation. Grandma at 42 - Hardly something to aspire to.

Wonderful news. Congratulations

I know the heartache of believing you won't have children, I also know the joy of the surprise... I was 38 though. Some issues mostly down to my health being not great and whilst impacting the pregnancy not related to it. If you are well and healthy in yourself you should do well, follow advice and Congratulations!

This is beautiful news. Congratulations. If your body has made you pregnant you simply can't be too old. Wow.

How wonderful, congratulations! 💐

If you're not already a confident consumer of public health and 'risk' statistics, become one now! Remember to ask about absolute risk, try not to be intimidated by relative risk (e.g "40% greater chance in older mothers) if it is something that only happens rarely.

Or even better, zone out all the stats a d relax 😊

Well obviously you’re not too old to conceive and congratulations.

You don’t say how old your step kids are, that would have a bearing on any decision you and your DH make. How old is he as well..... is he a slip of a thing, or similarly aged to you, or even older?

I had a parent who was 50 when I was born, and I would say from my own experience that being a child to an old parent (and a fifteen year old child to a 65 year old parent who was retiring, if you do the maths) was no fun at all. So while it’s not too old to have a baby, it’s too old to be a parent to a baby and child and teen, in my very humble experience.

Good luck to you all.

Pricilla, check out your family tree....you and your dc and dgc likely wouldn't exist at all without several older mothers!

Ignore Pricilla OP, if she came across as less of a troll and more of a reasonable human being it might be different, but she doesn't so heigh ho.

I had a parent who was 50 when I was born, and I would say from my own experience that being a child to an old parent (and a fifteen year old child to a 65 year old parent who was retiring, if you do the maths) was no fun at all. So while it’s not too old to have a baby, it’s too old to be a parent to a baby and child and teen, in my very humble experience.

Are you saying that you'd rather have never been born at all? Because realistically that's OP's only option here - she can't go back and have this baby at a 'better' time.

Congratulations, OP - wishing you the absolute best for a happy and healthy pregnancy.

Priscilla..how nasty are you? Congratulations op, just relax and enjoy

Wow congrats!!!

Sorry to derail a little but, Priscilla's comment was nasty (and untrue) but I don't think other poster's need to bashing young mothers either, it's pretty mean also.

I am confident in my mothering skills, despite being a 'young mum', and I don't feel the need to judge 'older mums', I am able to be young with children and still respect those 'older' who have children.

Priscilla my parents were the age of OP when I was born. How did I feel?! I felt like the dearly loved and much cared for child of two wonderful and devoted people - their age was entirely irrelevant.

Pricilla is making a comment from her own perspective and has a right to do so, even if it disagrees with the majority of sparkly eyed posters.
I have a similar opinion to her coming from a different perspective, having had a geriatric parent.

No doubt you’ll all be lining up to help this *geriatric primagravada when she’s overwhelmed by exhaustion, or are you just impressed she’s conceived?

*a medical term used to describe the first time mother if her age of first pregnancy is greater than 36 years old.

Btw that old parent of mine is dead 21 years now.... it’s not all roses roses all the way with late parenting. Just a thought from my own perspective and experience.

Congratulations, obviously you aren't too old to be pregnant so you aren't too old to have a baby. There are pluses and minuses of each age.

Priscilla your response was pretty unkind. I am sure that plenty of people would be upset at becoming a grandmother in their forties as well. My DC are in primary school so I would be.

@GinnyWreckin I'm with you on this. I happen to think that just because something can be done doesn't mean it should be done. That said, each to their own.

I think Priscilla's comment was unhelpful and seemed to come from a place of spite, whereas yours Ginny seems like a valid alternative view.

Congratulations - when's DH home ?