Bleeding, waiting for repeat scans, worried about viability etc – let’s unite in limbo!

[MrsMcJnr]

Ladies, I know there are quite a few of us in this category and I am conscious that although the lovely ladies on here are supporting us on every thread we post on, I am worried that we are spoiling their own pregnancy experience by worrying so I thought I?d set this up for those who really don?t know if things are going one way or the other. Thought it might help us to get through the days/weeks until we do know what?s going on.

For those who don?t know me (though I?m a prolific poster ) here?s me in a nutshell: Based on LMP I?m 9+4 weeks (9+1 based on suspected OV). First pregnancy (though had early termination 10 years ago). TTC for 8 cycles to get here. Got BFP 26/1. Some spotting that week so sent to EPU on 23/1 for early scan. Gestational sac seen by external scan and yolk also seen by internal scan. Measured only 11.4mm though so only 5+5/6 weeks. Was rescheduled for scan 7/3 to see if things had changed. Given 50/50 chance. Started heavy bleeding 1/3. Had emergency scan 2/3. Told sac still there and has grown. Repeat scan scheduled for 9/3. In the meantime, more heavy bleeding, clots, cramps and much anguish.

I just wish I knew what was going on! Please join me.

Hi Hun
Sorry to read things are not going as swimmingly as hoped. My thoughts are with you.

Try not to overwork yourself - you need rest... and lots of it. Are you still seeing your acupuncturist as he/she should be able to help you deal with the stress and MAY be able to help with the medical stuff.

take VERY good care

Sx

Hello MrsMJ, sorry you're having more bleeding, not nice, i really feel for you having been in the same boat myself reccently.
Just to let you know i'm still crossing everything for you. Hope you continue to get lots of support on here.

Hi mrsmj, I just wanted to say that its very sweet of you to be so concerned for others. I really hope everything turns out well for you.

xx

no advice really, just to sya that i am thinking of you xx

Hi MrsMcJnr

Sorry to hear what you are going through, but good that you are keeping your hopes up. As you should - the sac is still there and has grown - my sac was 18mm as well at the first (external) scan and they couldn't see the fetal pole either - not until the sac had grown to 35mm by the next scan.

Also, I am in the same profession as you and know that unfortunately most firms have very little understanding of these matters. I hope you are not having a hard time at work as well. Keeping fingers crossed for you - bring on Friday!

Thank you all for all your lovely posts

Sunshinedays ? it?s been a while since we spoke, how are you?

NewDKMum ? I?m really lucky, the firm are being really nice but it doesn?t stop you from feeling bad about being off a lot does it?

Hi - I'm fine - thanks for asking.

Still have no idea where babies come from, DH & I have just returned from a holiday to NZ (he's Kiwi) - it was fab.... was secretly hoping the sun, sea & surf might jog things along, but no!
We try IVF later this year - I am sure we are supposed to be thinking postive about the outcome - but I think we are a bit to realist on this - we have, at best, a one in three chance. ( I have posted on the ante natal clubs topics to ask for top tips to improve chances).

It is sobering to read your experience - sadly finally getting a BFP is only a step rather than the final result.
Stick with it hun, GET REST, there are lots of mums who have had far from simple pregnancies.
Sx

Sorry to hear that babies are still being elusive. I?m glad you had a good holiday though . Have you got the Zita West book? There are some good sections in there for preparing yourself for the whole IVF process. I really hope it happens before then for you but I?ll be following your story anyway. I know what you mean about the sobering effect of these things that happen after the BFP. I always thought it would be happily ever after from there on too but you live and learn as they say x

MrsMcJnr - I have to confess to feeling like a naughty schoolgirl, typing your name into the search facility ...I have thought about you lots over the weekend (I promise I am not a weirdo-stalker ) then I look for you and see that you've had a terrible time of it. I have felt so sure that Wednesday would be positive, now you have to wait til Friday. I'm so sorry to hear your news. I hope you are resting plenty! (((hugs))) My thoughts are with you chick! Take care Rx

Sunshinedays - Long time no see!!! Good luck with the IVF and everything

Hello MrsMcJnr, can I join in thelimbo please? funnypeculiar pointed me in the direction of this thread and I know what youmean about feeling you're putting the dampners on others pregancies. As you say the gals have been lovely and supportive (some pg, some not) but I don't want to drive people mad with my constant worrying.
A little bit about me, this is my second pg (Dd is 2) first one seemed to run very smoothly compared to this. If my dates are correct then I'm 7 weeks today. Had a bit of bleeding at 4/5 weeks, just before I found out I was pg then again lastnight. Been to visit the nurse today (haven't even had my booking in appointment with the midwife yet)and explained bleeding and feeling generally crap but with no real pregnancy symptoms. She's booked me in for a scan tomorrow. I've no idea what to expect, what can they see at that stage, what's a good sign, what's a bad sign? I'm so clueless about the whole thing it scares me even more. I have a stressful job and have had to 'pull a sickie' today - although, as the girls said, ifyou're pg and bleeding then it isn't really a sickie! I'm having to have tomorrow off as well, no one at work knows as it's so early on and i just want to scream!!
ARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH there, feel a bit better now! Hopefully you haven't fallen asleep reading this post and hopefully we can provide some support to each other - thinking of you for friday chick. Milly x

MillyM

Tomorrow at the scan if everything is fine you should see a heartbeat. However if one isn't seen then it isn't necessarily bad news as at 7 weeks it can still be too early and very much depends on the skill of the sonographer/type of equipment.

If they do an internal scan (not as scary as it sounds!) they will see more and you won't need a full bladder, (I hate having ultrasounds with a full bladder).

Bleeding in pg is 40% common and often fine. Cramping can be absolutely normal. I had a missed miscarriage last year and had no bleeding or cramps. However im now 12 weeks pg and at 5 weeks had the most awful backacke, convinced I was mc'ing but all fine.

Good luck xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you Edie- it's such a worrying time isn't it? As the ladies said,so often you hear BFP and presume the worry and waiting is over,it's a shock to fin it's only the start this time round!
They want me to arrive with a full bladder- great, especially as I have to drive myself there, not comfortable - so presume we're just doing the normal scan. I'm on myown tomorrow too as DH working away and can't change. Sorry to pick your brains, but if they see no heartbeat are they likely to call me back for another scan before the 12 week one?

I got here by accident, and just wanted to add what are hopefull comforting words.

Bleeding is very common, and often means nothing is wrong at all. My fingers are crossed for you. It is especially common if there are, or have been more than one embryo.

Re your dates, it is a little known fact that spontaneous ovulation accounts for 85% of all pregnancies (which is why we need dating scans, and why so many people think they have got the dates wrong) It happens during sex, when a totally unripened egg gets ripened and released. It also explains why 'trying' doesn't work.

Re IVF, If you are thinking about it, check out the possibilities abroad. It is so,so much cheaper, with very high sucess rates.

Oh dear, I don't mean to lecture! It's just that we went through IVF etc for 12 years (got nowhere but then went abroad, and got very, very lucky).

IVF is DEFINITELY not an easy route epecially in the UK, however, there is a lot you can do to make it easier.

Hi MrsMcJnr and co. Great that you started this thread! I will move over here as well.
My story: 4 1/2 pg and have started bleeding red blood. Not enough for AF/mc but too much for implantation. Dont know if I should go to GP or not. Have had very bad experiences with
both EPU and GP and really do not want to go.
On the other side would like to have some
resolution.

Ready ? thank you for looking for me and posting for me. For some reason I find it really hard to keep up with you all on the temp thread, please say hello and good luck to everyone for me. How are you, old pal?

Hello MillyM ? of course you can join hon, it?s good to have company but sorry that you are in the position you?re in I know what you mean about the constant worrying, I think I am sending myself and DH round the bend.

Ok, so you are 7 weeks you think based on your dates. You might only see a gestational sac with an external scan, and that woud be fine, you might see more, like the yolk, maybe even the heartbeat and fetal pole but don?t be disappointed if you don?t. If they do an internal scan (had one before? If not, it?s really ok) you might see more. The sonographer?s tend to say it like it is so you?ll be left in no doubt as to what they think. I?m not sure if this helps you at all, I hope so and best of luck for tomorrow. Fingers crossed that everything is just as it should be Make sure you keep me posted.

MillyM

It is normal for them to begin with an ultrasound but they may well go on to an internal if visability is poor, (which it quite often is at this stage).

If there is no heartbeat then they will re-scan you in one or two weeks' time. They most certainly will not wait til the 20 weeks scan.

Just wanted to drop in and pass on my sympathies to those going through such a horrible experience. I had something similar last year and unfortunately I did go on to mc, but I know of 3 other people with severe bleeding who have now had healthy babies.

It is a very isolating and confusing experience - I didnt understand why I felt so bad, it wasnt like I had a huge bump or carried to full term but I still desperately wanted and loved my baby.

Good luck to all with your next scans and look after yourselves.

Good Idea to start this MrsMcJnr.

Not sure if I should be hear though as I am pretty certain of what will happen next Tuesday
Thanks for the link earlier although dh is now even more worried about me as he now thinks I am hoping to hear something positive and completely break down when we hear what we are expecting

Ohh crossed with a few people ? sorry!

MMK ? that was really interesting, especially about the spontaneous ovulation, I didn?t know that.

Glimmer ? plenty of space for you in this waiting room of ours How long have you had the bleeding for now Glimmer? Did it coincide with when your AF would be due by any chance? It?s quite common to get bleeding around then, body just doing a spring clean.

Thanks Kezza

Hello Glimmer, sorry to hear about your bleed and bad experiences with epu. I know what you mean about resolution, I think I've typed in another thread, I just want my body to make its mindup.
Thank you MrsMc, I'll certainly keep you posted. Meanwhile (and I'm really sorry for the tmi quota here!) am I alone in wantingto cross my legs and never go to the loo again in fear of what I migh find? Never before have I been afraid to wee - this is very silly.
Edie, thank you for all the info. Internal scan sounds...uncomfy! I'd be really scared that whatever they put up there would start the bleeding again.
It's in times of stress like this I fancy a nice glass of wine- we don't even have that solace now! A glass of vimto it is then, somehow not the same !

Glimmer, yes have to agree, bleeding at this time, or just after AF was due is very common. My fingers are crossed for you. I truly feel for anyone going through this. As my mum always says, 'just because it is difficult, it doesn't mean it won't happen' so true.
I know far more people who had bleeding and went on to have babies, than people who had bleeding and didn't.

Of course you should be here Whoops It?s totally out of our hands if all/any of us will be lucky but I so hope we all will be. I keep thinking though that my body already knows the answer and I just wish it would tell me! [anger]

I?m sorry that you feel so strongly about the outcome already . Maybe I am just being an unreaslitic fool but I just cannot let go yet. I keep seeing all the blood and getting cross with myself for holding so much hope still.

Thing is, at my first scan, I really thought it would be ok and we were told it was only 50/50 ? it was like being hit by a truck and I?m sure you felt exactly the same, I was so sure of my dates and couldn?t find any hope in what they were saying but as I listened to people on here and read up, I felt really positive until the bleeding began. Then I felt so negative, DH and I really expected the worst from the second scan but we came away feeling more hopeful but really, the news hadn?t been very different from the week before we just interpreted it differently. Though I?ve bled so much more and felt so bad, I guess I choose just to stay hopeful as that?ll get me through but I do know inside that if Friday is bad news, I?ll be expecting it but I?m also preparing myself for another ambigous answer and a recall. They seem to like to give the pregnancy every chance which is great if it works out but just makes your heart?s desire further away if it doesn?t I do like to have as much info to hand as I can though, it helped on Friday that I knew how much a sac should grow and what I might not be able to see yet etc.

I know exactly what you mean MillyM about being afraid to go to the loo ? this is defo TMI but I dread the feeling of the clots falling and the smell of the blood, is the smell of that making anyone else feel sick? I know my nose is really sensitive at the moment (I do wash, honestly ). They refused to do an internal scan on me on Friday because of my bleeding. It is honestly not uncomfy and because you see more, it?s worth pushing for if things are a bit unclear. I?d love a glass of wine, have to say but imagine the hangover after 6 weeks at least of nothing?! The headaches I?ve been having are like a hangover without the wine actually

MMK ? you?re making me feel much better, thanks!

Bleeding after an internal can sometimes happen but don't worry about the actual scan. As I said I don't think it is as uncomfortable as having an ultrasound with a full bladder! You will be concentrating on the screen so you won't notice what they are doing!

MrsMcJnr I just explained my life story on the temp thread to Rahrah when she asked what DH did for a living (I said he couldn't take multi-vits just in case)... don't blame you for not keeping up with us, the thread moves so quick. Would it be ok if I told them your latest news??
Well, I am not really qualified to complain, considering where I am posting... but since you asked I will let you indulge me
I am CD31 and my temp has sunk to well below the coverline, and tell tales signs mean CD1 probably tomorrow So full steam ahead into cycle7. Bit down about it really because I don't really know where to go from here. It's getting long enough that it's starting to concern me, but not long enough that any GP would be concerned. IYSWIM? I've got grapefruit ready, pregnacare tablets for me, zinc for DH (hence the multi-vit chat) and a big dollop of optimism. When will my supply of that run out do you reckon ? Anyway, my friend texted me a pic of her little boy (he's 5 months) and I my heart sank. And then that makes me feel really guilty, because she tried really hard for him, had to have IUI, so I should feel wonderful when I see him, because it should give me hope... but I just ache. I just can't ever imagine what it will feel like to have a 5 month old.
Ok, I really should stop moping... I am ashamed that I am going on about my little whingy nothing problem to you. Talk about rude. Sorry again. Thinking of you.