Bleeding, waiting for repeat scans, worried about viability etc – let’s unite in limbo!

[MrsMcJnr]

Ladies, I know there are quite a few of us in this category and I am conscious that although the lovely ladies on here are supporting us on every thread we post on, I am worried that we are spoiling their own pregnancy experience by worrying so I thought I?d set this up for those who really don?t know if things are going one way or the other. Thought it might help us to get through the days/weeks until we do know what?s going on.

For those who don?t know me (though I?m a prolific poster ) here?s me in a nutshell: Based on LMP I?m 9+4 weeks (9+1 based on suspected OV). First pregnancy (though had early termination 10 years ago). TTC for 8 cycles to get here. Got BFP 26/1. Some spotting that week so sent to EPU on 23/1 for early scan. Gestational sac seen by external scan and yolk also seen by internal scan. Measured only 11.4mm though so only 5+5/6 weeks. Was rescheduled for scan 7/3 to see if things had changed. Given 50/50 chance. Started heavy bleeding 1/3. Had emergency scan 2/3. Told sac still there and has grown. Repeat scan scheduled for 9/3. In the meantime, more heavy bleeding, clots, cramps and much anguish.

I just wish I knew what was going on! Please join me.

Ta all for all the nice words of support. All being well, I am going to stick with cvs rather than amnio - lots of reasons really but mainly if worst case 'incomatipible with life' scenario would rather terminate sooner than later.

Best wishes to you all. MC are hard work - physically, emotionally.. I get annoyed at the attitude / expectation of some that you are going to bounce back and be fine within a couple of weeks (had a good friend say to me that it wasn't as though I had lost a proper baby. Grrr. She didn't mean to be crass and insensitive but she was. I think for all of us our babies are our babies whatever stage. Grief and pain is grief and pain however and whenever it happens) I totally understand your point Glimmer that becoming pg again is not some magic bullet where you again find peace and fulfillment - its fraught with anxiety and uncertainty and it is only gradually week by week that it starts to lessen a little (as scans etc provide some reassurance). I don't think we'll ever be 100% chilled with pregnancy - until its over after 40ish weeks with baby at the end of it.

Taichimum - hope the counselling helps. I've found it of use in the past. Take care x

I completely agree ejb. I read in one of my books on mc that there was some study that found that it was harder to copy with the grief of mc than infant death. I do not really think that this is a comparison that should ever be made, but it was interesting how they argued: They said that the grief is so overwhelming because we grief for the loss of our dreams and hopes and all the possibilities that new life had. We cannot grieve for the individuum itself, because we never had the change to meet it. Don't know if I agree or not but thought it was an interesting thought.

ImagineryImogen ? sending huge hugs, take good care of yourself, you?ve been through a lot this week. I know what you mean about the outside world. I ventured out to Tesco the day after I was told that the pregnancy was over only to meet an old colleague and her gorgeous 10 month baby, the baby grinned away at me and cheered me up but when my ex colleague started talking about how wonderful motherhood was I felt my self well up and panic because I didn?t want to cry in the veg aisle. I knew she?d had a MC too though so all I needed to say was ?don?t, I lost one yesterday? and we moved on to discuss the weather (so British!) It is hard to ?go about your business? again I felt. Give yourself time, you?ll know if and when you want to try again, no hurry.

Your PPH sounded so scary I hope the pain dies down really soon you poor thing.

Glimmer ? not stupid at all hon, don?t be mean to yourself! I could totally see where you were coming from. Hope I haven?t offended you, I didn?t mean too I know this is all very personal and emotive stuff and I hate the thought that I might have made you feel bad, it certainly wasn?t my intention

Taichimum ? I?m so sorry that you are so down, if we can help, you know where we are. Hugs xxx

Hugs all round, this is so hard!

Hi EJB, today is your CVS isn't it?
Thinking of you and wishing you all the best. I so very much hope that the result will be good and your little one is fine!!! Let us know how is goes!

MrsMCEB -- no offense at all. As you know sometimes well-meaning people somtimes say the very wrong things like "you are young and heathly, things will work out fine for you, you'll see" and it's just absolutely the wrong thing to say. I hope I will always remember and never say those things to others. And in a some
akward way I did a little. That's all. Hope you are doing well and enjoy the sunny day.

Yes, thinking of you too Ejb - all the very best

Glimmer

hullo all

arrrgghhh- after much angst and sleepless nights, they couldn't do cvs anyway. My womb is tilted backwards and there's a fibroid right in front of it (grr going to change my name to pregnancy-queen-of-roids I think). Far too risky

hey ho. I was in two minds so in one sense having the decision taken away from me was OK. I can go back next week and see if owt has changed /moved. However - have been advised that surgical termination will not be an option now anyway if the worst results were to come in (by the time any results come in I'll be past the window for that. Oh and by the worst I mean the incompatible with life scenario - Downs etc really isn't such a concern. We feel we could deal with that). All things and risks considered, reckon I'll leave it and go with amnio.

On a positive note - peanut looked good and am measuring 1 day ahead. Trying to stay really positive / optimistic. Hope you are all well x

Poor you Ejb going through all that angst for nothing! Sounds like fate has made your decision for you glad to hear all looked good and the baby is measuring well! Keep smiling!

Hi EJB. So sorry about all your anxiety, but well, I second MrsMcEB: somehow nature made the decision for you and your gut-feeling wasn't 100% into the CVS anyway. EJB, I am very ignorand and please only answer if your up to it: what does 'incompatible with life' mean and when would you find this out? I assume it means that the baby grows normally but is not able to
live outside the womb?! But remember the situation couldn't be more positve: the embryo has the right size and as you said yourself that fact by itself is the very best news that you could get. So maybe there is all reason to be hopeful and positve... So sorry about what you have to go through.

Two more days to my 8 weeks scan.

How are people today? Anyone lurking? AGAIN as Emma?s Dairy sent me reminder that I would have been 14 weeks today, I have received one for the last 4 weeks since my MC and tried to unsubscribe each time, it just makes me so cross (and sad to be reminded I guess)

Hey Glimmer ? ?incompatible with life? means that the baby can?t live outside the womb I think I?ll be thinking of you with your scan tomorrow, I hope it goes really well and you see everything that you should make sure you come and tell us how you get on!

Morning! I'll confess to lurking. Just like to keep an eye on what is happening to everyone since there are (sadly) quite a few people posting on here who are from the October antenatal or pg after m/c threads... Just hoping that everyone gets their happy ending eventually!

Thanks Mumpbump that was really sweet. Hope everyone is doing well on October. I've checked a wee bit to make sure the first scans went well. Feel quite protective over all those little ones! How are you getting on? feeling ok?

Feeling very well at the moment at last. The exhaustion seems to have died down. Hope you get your test results soon, MrsMc! Am I right in saying that they would probably prescribe you aspirin to combat the clotting?

Looking forward to when you and a few other familiar faces appear/re-appear on the pg after m/c thread...

Hi everybody. Composed this long post in the morning but then -pling- it got lost :-(

MrsMcEB and Mumpbump! :-)

Am anxious, but also excited about the scan tomorrow. Difficult mix of feelings. I will definitely let you know as soon as I get in!
Thanks so much for your good wishes.

Best of luck for tomorrow, Glimmer!

good luck with your scan glimmer? how many weeks are you now?

Hopefully 8 weeks today. Scan is tomorrow at 9am. Tomorrow is also my expcted due date, so somewhat emotionally charged. I hope I won't get any bad news on my expected due date -- would be so devastating...

this will be your second scan won't it glimmer? how come you are having another one? have you had more bleeding?
i am STILL bleeding on and off and i am now 14 weeks, so i have decided to just accept it! (would be nice if it stopped though!)

Hi Greedy! Congrats to your 14 weeks! You are well into the 2nd trimester now! (Although I never know if the first two weeks count or not...) My bleeding has actually stopped -- but I am having a reassurance scan, since most mc happen between weeks 6 and 8.
I guess this is the curse of having had a missed mc I went all the way to my 12 week scan without knowing something was wrong no bleeding at all. If something goes wrong this time I would like to know rather sooner than later. It's tricky and I am trying to find the right balance. I am still much more comfortable posting on the limbo thread than the pregnancy thread, since I feel very uncertain and do not want to get my hopes up too much.

Greddy. They saw a fibroid on my first scan.
I am wondering if that causes the bleeding (there is something called 'red degeneration' of a fibroid which causes bleeding and pain). Do you know if you have fibroids?
I am not sure if this would explain it in your case, though, since by now your cervix should be closed and the blood shouldn't be able to come out if its source is in the uterus?! This has never been clear to me (the fact that the cervix is closed), so I am not sure if my post makes sense.

Just popping in to check on people.

Glimmer - lots of good luck for tomorrow for both the scan and getting through your EDD. These anniversary dates become very significant I have realised. I hope the results are good and it proves to be a cathartic and healing day for you.

Greedy, have your midwives come up with any possible explanations? I spoke to mine today and she suggested cervical erosion as a possible cause - although I'm not sure what that is.

Glimmer ? have been thinking about you all morning, eagerly awaiting good news!

Greedy ? I can?t believe you are still having bleeds! I wonder if as time goes on they?ll be able to tell you where they are coming from, clearly from you rather than DD2? (just my guess everyone, nothing at all to back that up! )

Hi Rubles It?s been a while! How are you keeping? I wondered if cervical erosion was the cause of the bleeding I had at the beginning (rather than the big MC bleed). Apparently, the condition is caused when cells from the uterus grow outside on the cervix causing that to bleed due to hormonal changes. Its very common with people who?ve been on the pill for a long time. Think that?s right and hope it helps

Hi everybody. Just returned from my scan everything is fine. I made it to 8 weeks! Will try and relax somewhat now (didn't I say this after the 6 weeks scan already...). Thank you so much for all your good wishes and your support. These last weeks have been very draining for me don't know what I would have done without your support!!!

Rubles didn't realise you had had some bleeding as well. I looked up cervical erosion on the interner when I was bleeding (for three weeks) because I was wondering if it might have to do with the complications I had last year. As I understood 'cervical erosion' means that there is some soft placental tissue 'outside' of the cervix that bleeds easily. It's really nothing to worry about unless is causes pain or infection (which I believe is very rare). The cause of action is to do nothing. Good luck to you you must be well into the 2nd trimester now!

Hi MrsMCEB

, we cross-posted. Thanks so much for thinking of me -- it really helped that I knew I could come here and share whatever news there was for me.

Did you get your blood-results back? Still waiting for AF? I guess it's not been six weeks yet, so still well withing the 'normal' margin.

Hurray!!! So pleased for you Glimmer! Excellent news...

great news glimmer. i really hope you can try and relax a little bit now!

i do have cervical erosion. i have been told that in the past so i guess that could well be the cause of my bleeding. when i mentioned it as a possible cause to the consultant in the epu when i was first bleeding she lokked at me like i was stupid, but i reckon it could be the cause. i was also told i have a pregnancy cyst, which i looked up on the internet and that can apparently cause bleeding too. i dont really think the cause of bleeding is easy to establish. i have had it with both of my previous pregnancies, but never bright red like this time. anyway, like i said.......i have kind of given up worrying! i would be a complete wreck by now otherwise!!