Pregnant (IVF) Worriers/ Warriors Part 5

[MrsHY1]

Hello ladies! Come and find me!

Morning All

Noks You have every right to be Fucked Off (Yes, this is a swearing situation even for me!). What is wrong with having a water birth ffs? Loads of people do it. In fact it is probably top of most people's birth choices. We had the same thing with everyone commenting on our home/hypno birth choices. I have also had to live with all the 'I told you so's' and 'We are glad that you went to hospital '. They should all fuck right off and mind their own effing business. As you can tell I'm cross on your behalf. As for DP, the enormity of the situation is about to hit him. I don't think that they can anticipate what is about to come. Well let's face it none of us can but at least we have our bodies telling and preparing us for it all. Whatever happens in the next couple of days, we are all rooting for you whatever your choices.

Sweets, I can't add any words of wisedom to what the others have suggested I'm afraid. But am sending you loads of hugs. that must be very scary and worrying. Fingers crossed that things will right themselves after 6 weeks. How long to go now? On a positive note, the twins are beyond cute.

Expat Ha Ha about not getting complacent until the bubba's hold down a job. I guess my parents are still on high alert then . I totally understand you getting upset about the thought of going back to work. March seems so soon. I remember you saying about mat leave in Belgium being only a few months. Good luck with the chat with your boss. I hope that you get the deal you hope for. It sounds like a good idea to share childcare. That is what we would like to do but we are a long way off DP having Shazlett on his own for any length of time yet. And not just because of bfing. He is still abit anxious about his ability to look after her.

On that note, I have to decide whether to start expressing. I'm going to ask lots of questions at the milkspot today but what do you all think about starting at 7 weeks. Am I too late? I have been lent an electric pump. The Medela Swing. Do you think that I just need to buy new valves? We have sterilised the tube and suction thingy. Is that enough? What time of day should I express? and do I express into the bottle with the kit and then transfer to bags? We have a new Tommy Tippee closer to nature sterilising kit with lots of new bottles so I'm guessing that we can use those. I don't need to buy new ones do I especially for breastfeeding?

I hope that the jabs were ok Keep and Expat. I'm dreading those for Shazlett. I don't have any Calpol. it is now on the list!

Keep we have been lent 2 slings, the Tricot Slen by Babylonia and the Moby Wrap. Both are long wraps that you tie up. It is complicated at first but there are loads of youtube vids to help. The thing is that I get Shazlett in it fine but gradually she slumps down and gets heavier and heavier. She is all curled up and I keep trying to move her head to keep her nose free. I think that I'm going to go to the sling library next week to get some tips and see if I can start to use a soft structured sling that still supports her in the 'm' shape but is less hit and miss to put on. SIJaws had one over Christmas that looked good.

Dildals sounds like you had an exciting trip to Sainsburys! I feel for Bella getting over stimulated but at least you get her out and about. Shazlett and I still spend most of our time indoors. I suppose that we have not long got home from Christmas but I should go out more. I'm getting out at least once a day to the shop for example. Today we are going to the HV and the milk spot. What is Wonder Weeks? How do I know if Shazlett is having a growth spurt? Good news on the night feed routine. I'm looking forward to seeing how much Bella has grown on Friday. Re Fenugreek tablets, do you think they are worth taking?

Gin I hope that this morning's weigh was ok and I will see you at the Milk spot this afternoon. Looking forward to meeting Ginster and your mum!

MrsH I was already envious of your beauty regime and now you have got a new hair cut! Please could you give me the name of the salon that have mummy and baby days when I see you on Friday? I'm going to cancel the appt that I have booked for the 18th. I don't think that DP is ready to take the reigns for the few hours that it would take for me to get my hair done. On Streatham mums I've seen a few hairdressers who come to the house recommended. I might go down that route also. How was last night? I'm also not napping during the day as advised. tsk tsk!

Fairy I think that it is great that you can be practical about the jabs. I'm worried that I will freak out at the first sign of distress and illness for Shazlett. I cried for ages when she had green poo a couple of weeks ago . I'm glad that Pangolina is doing well. I hope that we can organise another meet up. I would love to see her.

Onion Time is flying by. Ringlett is nearly 1! Are you going back to work full time? How is operation stairgate coming along? Is Ringlett walking?

I can feel a sore throat coming on today. I guess this means that Shazlett will probably catch a cold from me. I'm armed with the snot removal thingy but no doubt will be frantically posting in the coming days asking how to use it.

I'm going to go and prepare my lunch while Shazlett is sleeping in the sling. Then it is ready to go once I've fed her. The sling at least gives me 2 hands!

Bye for now....!

Crisps I hope Nancy is rallying. Thinking of you all.

Gin, hope today goes well.

Shaz I had the tricot too. The woman on the box looks good but I found all the material gathered in a big lump around my waist and both m and I massively over heated. Her head would pull down and like you said, she slumped gradually and keeping the nose clear was a nightmare. I had to walk with one arm around the sling supporting her. That's one reason why I moved to the manduca. I like walking with both hands free feeling confident in the support.
I take m to the hairdresser. The hair dryers make brilliant white noise.
The advice over here now is to just wash bottle eqpt in hot water and not sterilise. Is better for immune system apparently.

Sweetie that sounds incredibly stressful anything to do with your eyes is scary. Hope you see a specialist quickly.

she cried horribly at the jabs but has been OK since. she has basically slept since 4pm...

shaz re expressing. I sterilise all bottles etc, express into a bottle, and then put that in the fridge. I don't freeze as we just use within a few days and we have several bottles. I express in the morning as that's when I have most milk. it can take a while to get used to and some people find it really hard but I have quite a lot of milk. key is to relax and think of the baby to get your let down. weird but it really impacts. it might take a while for your supply to adjust. I'd try her with a small amount first anyway. then as she gets used to it and you express more it can replace a feed. I have never given her the bottle, only dh, to minimise confusion. as I said yesterday she seems to prefer faster teats so may be worth trying another if she doesn't get on. I don't think you've left it too late, but would try soon if you can.

I'm sorry your dp isn't confident to look after her. sorry if this sounds harsh but i kind of feel he needs to step up, just like you've had to. you had no choice! maybe if he could feed her he'd feel more confident. but you do need time off. I'm v happy dh can do 9-midnight as I have a break. also often does earlier in the evening, bath, play etc.

I have a semi structured sling. like it but wondered if the soft ones would be more comfy for her. maybe not.

shaz the South London sling library in W norwood is moving to Beckenham, last session was today and I handed in my Hana wrap. Also bought 3 baby bandanas to mop up the large amount of drool B has started producing!! And .. Because Mini-Al is our style icon ... A pair of baby leg warmers ... All extremely necessary purchases indeed!

Will respond re WW and fenugreek later.

fenugreek ups milk supply. I took it a few days early on when I was stressing and it does work. do you have supply issues?

I didn't take fenugreek supps but a friend gave me weleda bf tea, which I drank in hospital. The tea is basically dried fenugreek and my supply came in v quickly so who knows. Oats are also supposed to help.

Pls take a pic of b in the bandana Dildals! Where did you get them? We don't have such high fashion baby wear in Belgium.

gin what weigh in news and how's it been with dh back at work? how long is your mum there?

Hello all. Well ginster weighed 3580 today, 80g more than birth weight. Apparently they would like her to have put on more and want to weigh her again in 2 weeks time. At birth she was in the 50th percentile and now is 25th (but 98th for length!), however I had a lot of in fluids during the enormo labour and this can give a falsely high birth weight.

Anyway we went to the milk spot this arvo and the MW there said you'd expect a bf baby to put on 60g in a week and ginster has put on 65 in 5 days, so she couldn't understand the concern and told me not to worry! I love that woman, she's so sensible and reassuring.

It was good to get out today and to see the lovely Shazz and shazzlet at the milk spot. I must try to get out more. My mum came too! She's been a total godsend - I'm going to have to ween us off her help gradually. DH misses ginster, although not enough to do her nappies in the night!

Oh no re sling library dildals. I was planning to go soon. Where the feck is Beckenham?! Baby leg warmers sound tres cool.

keep how's the sleeping going? Pleased the jabs were ok. I've hired a medela swing pump but still can only get out paltry amounts. Doesn't help that ginster is always on the boob...

al do you still use the sling? I like the idea of being able to move about the house with ginster.

sweetie go the twins and their weight gain! Can't believe they aren't trying to do more for your vision. Must be very debilitating.

onion star gates already?! Can't believe how the Fred babies are growing up.

noks I agree re telling peps to fuck off. Wtf is wrong with a water birth? Of most of my friends, it's the no 1 birth choice. I got all excited re the nipper when I saw your FB message. Not long to go now...

mrshy I too am intrigued about your hair dressers. I have an appt in feb and will have to leave ginster with someone, prob with some formula as my hair takes so bloody long to do!

That's great Gin! I think the MW is bang on. Wow, 98 percentile! How long is she?

Yes I use the sling a lot. It's more fun for m to be able to look around when we're out and she can tuck her head in when she's had enough.

Gin well done on Ginster's weight gain! Sounds like a great milk spot you have there. Fab that your mum has been so helpful. Mine was resoundingly crap when she came for 3 days over Xmas- she said she couldn't understand why mini HY is such a bad baby (just because she was a bit fretful in the evenings like normal babies are), that my bf- ing obviously wasn't satisfying her and I should change to formula, and that if I were her I should leave her in a room to cry. Given my relationship with my mum is pretty crap this baby raising opinion /approach is very telling! I will do things my way thank you... Oh gosh, sorry, that turned into a bit of a rant!
DH has just got home and is getting dinner on. I am lying on the sofa with mini HY attached to a tit where she has been for the past hour and 15 mins, alternating between feeding and comfort sucking. She's been fretful all day and apart from one nap this morning has resisted all other efforts to get her to sleep. Meanwhile I feel and look like I've been run over by a bus, despite my new hair do. Bleurgg.
Noks, I want to hear details. Was it pee after all?

Bloody hell MrsH - sorry your mum was so crap.

Oh fuckitybollocks. Just did a hoooge post on the old thread with the bloody app, didnt realise we had migrated, sod. Off to ward in a sec so to sum it up..still gere, all the same, wont see any progress till end f mext wk at least so sitting it out, nancy still stable for now, welcoe llw2, you lot are ace, some of our family are knobs, we are fine, come on noks!!! That has to be my most succinct post yet!!!!

Oh and noks...ask your bfto be your birthing partner and promotly drown her in the pool, what a twunt.

Evening all

So, for those not on Facecrack, the story goes a little like this.....

DP leaves for work at about ten to seven. After being awake from about four-ish until he left, I settled back down for a sleep. Woke-up at 9.45 , went for a pee (stick with it.....it's big on detail but ALL relevant ) and, lo and behold, there was some sticky clear fluid in my pyjama bottoms. Defo not pee pee, most certainly something else. So I ring maternity and they tell me to monitor the situation. So, on high foof alert, I decide to go for a walk into town just to keep moving about. I grabbed a coffee and, with a little leakage still going on, wander back to the house and ring maternity triage. The nice wee Scottish lady tells me to come in to be checked-out, so off I go to the hospital. I was strapped to a monitor and all was going ok until she asked me to change sides after she examined la fanjeroo. The baby's heart rate dropped really quickly and then she lost it completely. She looked really concerned but wasn't really saying anything. She was frantically trying to adjust the monitor to pick-up the nipper's heartbeat, which she did. Eventually (well, after a minute or so but it felt like ages). The nipper then had to be monitored for an hour afterwards, because of the sudden drop in heart rate. All is fine, but the doctor wants me to go back tomorrow for further monitoring, just as a precaution. She concluded that I was leaking mucus which some ladies get throughout pregnancy, but not leaking amniotic fluid. I am still 1cm dilated, cervix is still soft and I am having mild contractions (very very very very early labour contractions, says wee Scottish midwife) but nothing more. So, it wasn't amniotic fluid but nor was it pee pee. T'was mucus. Yuk-a-rama. And let-down-a-rama. I thought I was going to avoid the induction, give birth in the pool and give a massive two fingers to all the mockers. Alas, this may not come to pass.

shazza hearing you swear is like hearing the queen say 'big dogs cocks' when she stubs her toe on the door. Thank you for your outrage. I love it !

gin thank god for this sensible woman at the milk spot. Sounds as though minigin is dong just fine. As long as the weight is going on, that is the main thing. Panicking you really doesn't help.

dils B is obviously in training for da neighbourhood hard nut award. I do follow your stories of over stimulation with interest though...isn't it funny how this affects them ! Something I never anticipated before now. It's definitely one to be aware of, as mrsh also proves.

Hi to everyone else. Sorry your ma was such a nightmare mrsh. Xx

CRISPS CRISPS CRISPS CRISPS CRISPS

We cross-posted. We LUFFS you crisps. Xx

keep I forgot to say that I hope S is ok after her jabs. Xx

keep I don't think I have a supply issue, but as you know they scared me a little about Bella's weight gain and she had a couple of days where she just wanted MORE BOOB MUMMY, MORE BOOB!!! in the evening. And because her 12w growth spurt is coming up and I fuckin hate expressing I thought I'd take some fenugreek. I just love how it makes me smell ....

shazz Wonder Weeks is a book written by Real Doctors. So it must be true. It talks about several developmental leaps your baby will go through and that you can then expect them to be more fussy. I didn't buy the book, but I did buy the app. To be honest, it reads like a horoscope ... at 12 weeks apparently my baby will start, then they have a whole list including things like making spit bubbles, grabbing/swatting, chatting etc. No fucking shit. Me, with zero knowledge of babies, could have predicted that this could perhaps be one of the many skills babies develop around this age. I am starting to think that you will always read something in there that applies to your baby. I really think half of all the books are utter bollox and that you're better off just getting to know your baby, what she likes, doesn't like, what makes her drop off, what makes her laugh etc. And that when she is off a couple of days, crying more, sleeping less, feeding more, just roll with it. I feel like half of the time I am saying 'oh she's having a growth spurt' like I used to say 'oh, probably a blocked duct' in my expressing days. We're all trying to find an explanation for how our babies behave whereas there's probably no explanation at all. They're just babies, doing fine, and developing those fabulous spit bubbling skills, swatting sticky hands skills and doing massive loud shit skills. There. Rant over. (It'll prob take 4 hrs before I start researching 'sensitive baby' or something like that ;-) )

mrsHY WTF?! at your mum.

gin re expressing - I only get small amounts now, I think this may be normal because you're breastfeeding?

onion I do try and venture out once a day! For my own sanity!!! I honestly don't get up to much in a day, a trip to the post office counts already as A Major Activity! Ringlet has got a DD1 bouncing around on a daily basis that must already be quite a bit of stimulation !!

crisps Oh FFS stop swearing Crisps! ;-)

noks was just thinking, if you have water birth are you allowed to pee in the water? I mean, it's gonna happen isn't it? Quite handy really.

expat I got the bandana at the sling library, but they also sell similar ones at Sainsbury's I noticed. Sainsbury's got quite nice baby stuff actually! (I find) I love M's Orla Kiely style sleep suit, suits her complexion too!

Oh, and we did have a quiet afternoon yesterday. We caught up on 2 episodes of Breaking Bad (boxset I got for xmas - tactical buy from DH) and a Sherlock Holmes episode. Hard work. And although she didn't go berserk, she still didn't want to sleep upstairs, she wanted to watch more Breaking Bad episodes and to be frank who can blame her, it's pretty good.

noks I had mucous leakage in the days just before labour, I just didn't mention it because I'm too much of a Lay-Dee! Har har. Good luck with the monitoring tomorrow. And like the others I don't understand why a water birth deserves mockery. They are effing awesome. As a friend of mine said after her two water births, "I don't know how anyone gives birth on dry land."

sweetie ok, fluid on your brain does sound rather scary but the body does recover remarkably from pregnancy. This is incredibly minor in comparison but I developed carpal tunnel when pg from the extra fluid in my arms and my finger tips on my right hand went completely numb. They only regained sensation just before Xmas so it took 8 weeks at least. I hope you do get to see a specialist if it isn't better by 6 weeks.

dildals I must get that app because P at 11 weeks has just started blowing spit bubbles, grabbing/swatting and chatting, sometimes all at once. Then I'll know what comes next. :-) i have some baby bandanas too, they're everywhere now. It's like someone decreed "Bibs are lame, bandanas are where it's at".

gin great news re ginster's weight gain. I would trust the MW who said everything is fine.

crisps hello! X

I can't remember who started the sling conversation but we have a baby bjorn, which is quite structured. I had an unstructured wrap type with DS and found it ver uncomfortable. I would say don't buy new, there are dozens of all kinds of slings on EBay and Gumtree because most people don't use them for very long. I got mine on Gumtree for 5 quid.

fairy we have a 2nd hand baby bjorn that I've not yet attempted to fathom out! Must have a go. You can use then for new borns right?

al I think she's 56cm. Length wise she needs the next size babygros now, but her legs are incredibly skinny, so they're gonna look ridiculous!

noks hope everything goes ok tomoz. Is Friday induction day? If they get out the evil drip, I would say fuck it and have an epidural - best thing ever, but I am a wuss and even had hourly top ups. Man did I love that little syringe of druks.

Big luffs to crispy. Thinking of little Nancy.

mrshy your mum sounds helpful! I banned anyone who I thought might try to interfere...

Ginster has watched breaking bad too dildals. Just hope none of it went in, it was a particularly wrong episode! In fact DH was wearing a t shirt that said 'let's cook' with a picture of the meths camper van on it when she was born and to complete the bad ass atmosphere, when we tried to put on the chilled play list immediately after labour, DH instead played the Beastie Boys...

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/may/25/breastfeeding-backlash-zoe-williams

Interesting article about breast not always being best.

I didn't know that the medical research underpinning the health benefits is questionable and that the benefits of breastfeeding are probably more interlinked with the decision to breastfeed rather than the act of BF itself.

Oh yes, the breast feeding is a feminist issue thing. Zoe probably sold a few more books from it.

I don't think you can use a baby Bjorne for a newborn because you can't put their legs in the m position. They might have changed their design though.

Interesting to read about Breaking Bad. I watched he first few episodes on Dutch TV and it looked good, so will get the box set. Really enjoyed the sopranos.

CRISPS! It's so great to get an update. Thinking of you all. xx sorry about the rubbish relatives. Some people just aren't able to step up.