Pregnancy post mc: Totally's grads continued part 5...

[SamanthaB123]

Our new thread to take us through the Chrisnas season. Pull up a chair, grab a mince pie and join us for support in pregnancy post miscarriage. All welcome!

Thanks Northern have found it now! (Dear God I am losing the plot!)

So pleased Viv - G I R L

Pesky cat clare, hope this tickles you as much as it did me I just can't help to love moggie despite pukey cat hair ball sickies! DD & DH are desperate for a dog but with twins in the mix we have no room at the inn! Maybe some sea monkeys?

Loopy crimbo shopping with sans children = heaven.

Afternoon ladies,

Apologies this is going to be a mememe post I'm afraid.

Had another scan today (this baby is the most photographed baby in the world!) and she's still measuring big. Above the 95th percentile. Does anyone have experience of big babies and what this means for birth? I'm still thinking about where to give birth - had been thinking about the birth centre at the local hospital but I've recently been thinking about a homebirth. I realise that if she gets much bigger I may have to be induced earlier than later and that would pretty much rule out HB or even MLU as I'd be on the labour ward and being monitored. If that's the case I can deal with that.

However, I'm beginning to really consider having a HB and my DH is coming round to the idea too. The other problem is that I have epilepsy. I don't think I have it too serious - I haven't had a tonic clonic seizure where I've lost consciousness since I was 14 and have been seizure-free since 2004. I haven't had to increase my medication during pregnancy and as it is photosensitive I am very aware of a) the conditions which cause problems and b) warning signs. While I accept that as I haven't given birth before I don't know how my body will react, what hormones will be realised and how this might affect me, I am confident that both my DH and I will recognise if there are any problems and act accordingly. I should also say that stress, tiredness and especially bright lights are triggers, so a less stressful birth with dimmed lighting would be preferable. Personally I feel a HB where I feel relaxed and in control with one-to-one care from CMW would be better than the labour ward. Unfortunately my CMW on Wednesday was less than enthusiastic. I do understand why - most of them probably don't have much experience of fits and it might worry them. But I do think they should have more faith that I understand my condition and that I wouldn't do anything which would endanger either myself or my baby and moreover, that I would know (and have time to get into hospital) if there was a problem. I also know that they can't refuse me a HB. If the consultant next Wednesday says I don't need to be induced I can insist on a HB, but I don't want to have a reluctant CMW, or indeed, be told on the night that there is no one available and I'll have to go into the labour ward. Does anyone have any bright ideas about how I can convince my CMW that HB could work for me?

So two questions: 1) big babies and what this means for birthing options and 2) getting CMWs to realise you aren't being irresponsible, but are in fact aware of your personal circumstances and that their 'one size fits all' response to women with epilepsy isn't very helpful.

As I said, really sorry for my self-obsessed post. I promise I'll try to post later with proper name checks and everything! xx

Big hugs Louise I hope that you get more answers when you see you consultant in a few weeks. It's always hard to hear why, I remember thinking the same when I got the placenta histology for DD2. xx

Redhead can't really offer you any advice on HB I have always been too high risk to even consider it, but I am sure you have to be completely and totally low risk in all areas, depends on hospital policy though. Good luck.

Louise my heart goes out to you, every day. E. Coli or GBS, it could just as well have been our Ianto who didn't make it. I can't imagine him not being here, Georgie's death is so very very very, desperately sad. I am so very grateful that my boy is well and yet so sad for Georgie and you. I wish, I wish I could bring her back for you.

I can understand you feeling guilty sometimes. People telling you not to, doesn't stop the feeling. And yet it is true: It is not your fault. As you said, "just" a cruel twist of fate.

Wishing you all the strength in the world to get through all the bad days that are bound to lie ahead, and hope that there may be at least a few good days in between. I have everything crossed for you that TTC leads to a BFP for you soon.

Hi Ladies,

Checking in to let you know that after 3 attempts the ECV worked . Baby is now head down. It was so so uncomfortable and v sore up at the top of bump but worth it in the end. I think it all would have been easier if the super MW had done it first as she has a huge success rate but a doctor wanted to try first and had no luck, then another MW and no luck, then 'super MW' came along and did it. Baby is moving since we got home which is a nice relief too. I feel totally different though, much heavier down below which is great. Thing is now that baby has to get engaged etc, we may have weeks and weeks to go which is a little bit hard to imagine but we'll just have to see. Will have to try some exercise or something to help it engage. Just exhausted though today as didn't sleep a wink last night.

Louise that's just so hard to get that news and yet in some way it's good to get a reason but it doesn't make it better etc. It's absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, you weren't to know you aren't well. Main thing is if you can stay strong to encourage your ttc to be successful.

GIlda enjoy your last day

redhead sorry i can't help you.

viv excellent news that your scan went well - that's great news .. lots of conversations here too as our hb was under 140 when i was being monitored after the ecv and the mw's said a few times to each other we can see whether it's a boy or girl so i'm totally convinced it's a boy although i couldn't see anything!

northern good news that your anti-d yesterday was enough for you

purple welcome to this really really fantastic thread.. it's a great support mechanism. The first weeks until the 12 week mark are tricky but we all know what you are going through and are here for you.

Thanks all xxx

thanks loopy that's what i've been saying to it all day!

Loopy - thanks for all your good advice. I will definitely check out the yahoo group. I heard that scan measurements are ±15% which can be a big difference. I'm not worried unduly. The human body doesn't create something it can't give birth to. I'm sure a vaginal birth is still an (the best) option. I'm only concerned because they may want to induce me which as they say starts the 'cascade of medical intervention' and I'd rather not be hooked up with synotocin (I prefer the au naturel approach to hormones). I spent the afternoon on bigbaby.org,uk which was really informative.

Ok name-check time;

Great news Happy - really pleased you're all ready to go.

Northern - glad your Vit D yesterday was enough.

Viv :-) I remember trying to decide if the HB was 'galloping' or 'chuffing like a train'...

Loopy - I bow down in admiration at your organisation. Haven't had the first thought about what to buy people, let alone booking time off to do the shopping and actually doing it!

Big WOOO! to Gilda on her last day. Pom poms are out!

Big hugs for Louise. One always thinks how knowing why these things happened is always going to be better than not knowing, but dealing with knowing can almost be harder. Keeping my fingers crossed for you and the SWI!

So much news!

Happy, great that it worked, I can stop crossing my fingers for you now

Redhead, scan estimated size, notoriously unreliable I gather... I was told DS was approx 7lb, he was only 5lb 13oz, however, the midwife was a little when she saw the scan report, I think they may have a much better idea from having a feel of the baby. That said, I'm still carrying on with my growth scans this time around... but I have baselines now, and really it's to see if growth drops off or fluid drops, which I hope they will be reliable for detecting.
Good luck with your birth plans, I hope you find some expert advice on epilepsy and childbirth that will help you.
Oh, and induction not always that bad, I was terrified when told I had to be induced with DS, thought it was bound to be a long drawn out painful process culminating in CS or forceps. As it turned out, one pessary is all it took and no further intervention, and a relatively short labour, I was as surprised as the midwife when I felt the urge to push!

Viv, great news on the heartbeat! I think the heartrate girl/boy thing is very much an old wives tale though. This little bean should be a girl if you believe that, and I've had several sonographers agree now that he isn't. The speculation's great fun though, it's so nice to be able to be doing the lighthearted pregnancy stuff.

Sam thanks for iron advice, I might just try the floradix and see who I agree with on the taste! Good for you on the 'just one more', it took me a while to persuade DH that another was a good idea after DS arrived, but he's so much younger than his big siblings I'm really happy we finally have another on the way closer in age for him. That and the fact that I was just incredibly broody almost as soon as I got home from hospital

Maltester, the CMW said they 'prefer' iron levels to be at least 11.5 for homebirth, she said it was just in case of heavy blood loss, and then she went on to say that haemorrage (sp?) is more likely if your iron levels are low... the latter reason seems a bit bizarre, any truth in it? I can at least see the sense in making sure my iron levels not too low, when they were 10 point something I did feel awful, so in any case I'm keen to get back up to decent levels if I can.

Thanks everyone for the iron boosting tips. Lucky you Loopy - my multivits have higher iron than pregnacare, and I've been diligently taking them from day 1 and they've not really helped a great deal, possibly though I was a bit more anaemic to start with right after 2 MC's in rapid succession. I'll soon be the pregnant sober one at my office xmas party for the second year running...

Gilda, hope you're relaxing this evening and enjoying a wave of euphoria that work's truly over for a while! You'll be joining Unbuffy regaling us with tales of how clean your house is soon, no doubt??

How is it at the top of the list Unbuffy? I must admit I hated the hot curry to get things going plan... tried it, but the heartburn was absolutely hideous, so that one's off my list this time around!

Pre-12 week scan ladies, I hope you're all finding moments where you're happy to be pregnant and not worrying constantly. We all know how worrying it is, but it's good to try to make the most of it all.

Which reminds me, I think there were a few ladies from the 6th form common room upduffed, pre-12 weeks and not ventured over here yet... hoping for a run of good 12 week scan news soon, if any of you are reading this, fingers crossed for you

Louise, big hugs, I really don't know what to say except that I'm thinking of you, feeling for you, and hope you'll carry on sharing your feelings with us. All the very best of luck with ttc!

Everybody else - I'm sorry, end of a long week and Brian's deserted me.... (and I need to go and eat!) so my namechecking stops here, but big waves to all and apols to those I missed.

hi purplehibiscus welcome to the thread and congrats on being pregnant again. Your GP can advise how to get an early scan in your area, however it is normal for EPUs to offer this to those who have already had a miscarriage. At my EPU they suggested waiting until at least 7 weeks, to be sure of seeing a heartbeat. Really good luck with everything. There's a real mix of people on the thread who are at all stages of pregnancy which is really nice. But it moves fast and I haven't caught up with everyone yet!!!

I am 11 weeks tomorrow. Nearly there now. Feeling like crap most of the time but I'm not complaining. Well, I am, but not really ...

Happy Friday night all

Hello all. I tried to keep up but have forgotten everything I wanted to say. So hello to the new folk, hooray for turning babies, and waves to everyone.

Gilda congratulations on finishing. I can't believe I've been off a month now, it flies.

Louise sorry to hear your news. It all sounds so indiscriminate and completely unfair. I hadn't given any thought to swabs last time round, but given your and Meita's posts on ecoli and gbs, will definitely be asking the midwife next week. Especially as my brother had major abdominal surgerythis year and has battled 2 bouts of Mrsa. I have slight worries my reduced pregnancy immunity makes me more susceptible to his infections if he stays here / we visit him.

happy great news on turning baby!

rhg scans are notoriously inaccurate for size, my 5'' friend had ds1 at 9lb so had lots of scans for ds2 which indicated 9lb+ but he was actually 6'13"

alba great news to hear on the bfp's from t'other thread. Will have a little nosey!

crochet and purple big welcome :-)

As for me, I'm doing well, much better than with ds1. Perhaps finishing early was a good thing!

Hi everyone - sorry been missing for a while and not caught up with all of the old thread yet so sorry if I missed anything out.

Welcome to Crochet, Appleblossoms, Emmywoo, PurpleHibiscus and anyone else I've missed.

Hairy - so, so sorry to hear your news. It's so unfair. xxx

Louisesh - you are in my thoughts daily. Must be hard working through the reason but hope it helps in the long run to know. I know someone who had a stillbirth but the hospital lost the tests taken at birth and I think it made it harder for them never getting an answer. xxx

Alba - great news that a homebirth is on the cards. I found spinach and watercress (raw in salads) really helped my iron levels.

Sam - I've just deflated my birthing ball and put it away. Off to search it out again!

Gilda - I found a TENS machine helped (it also annoyed me after a while) - I used it and a hot bath to get me to 10cm before leaving home. I got mine second hand off EBay. Regarding slings, I'm using a babasling and a Baby Bjorn (DH really likes the Baby Bjorn).

Ivy - at salmonella. Hope you're feeling much better now.

Unbuffy - I was a first timer and I'm completely phobic/wimpish about going to the dentist etc so wasn't sure how I'd manage. But within a week I was thinking about trying for number two so can't be that bad! Or else hormones are very effective things (which is equally good news as they help you get through childbirth!)

Loopymumsy - sorry I've missed the story about why you are seeing a consultant. Hope you get someone you like though.

Stuffmk - congrats on the scan

VivC - so pleased your appointment went well.

Redheadgal - you've had some great advice from loopymumsy. Sorry I don't know much about this area but I've read that size scans are not that reliable. I'd echo the suggestion to post a separate thead regarding the epilepsy. Had to reread your thread about attending your booking in appointment!

Clareanna - at shoes!

Happygirl - glad your trial run to the unit was OK. Good news re your little one turning.

Northern - glad your mw reassured you. I had something similar happen to me (dog jumped up at my stomach) and I was worried but I reasoned that lots of mums with toddlers must get kicked in the stomach etc. I'm 0 neg as well by the way.

Magic - I've been told that bad heartburn means the baby will have a full head of hair! Glad the scan went well.

Had my first 5 hours sleep in a row last night - bliss!!! Feeling more human today - hence the catch up.

Lots of December babies due - how exciting and just realised we have two due on Christmas day!

Saw Cheepz mentioned earlier - has anyone heard from her?

Anyway apologies for missing anyone out but this is about as much as my sleep deprived brain can cope with. Love to all.

Hi
spotted Cheepz had been asked after again, and I neglected to respond last time. In touch with her on FB, she's mad busy with new job, and has been on a wicked holiday, moved house and generally been FAR too busy to think about TTC :). But I will let her know she's been thought of - wave to all, am immersed in X Factor, must dash

Good to hear Cheepz is okay jollster.

Having a rubbish day here, really really rubbish but won't bore you all. On top of that, bump is so incredibly sore and tender after the ECV, it's getting sorer also but it makes sense after all the manouvering yesterday. Bit worried baby may have turned again too as woke up with a jump in the middle of the night and it had definitely done something in there so we'll see. First time it's woken me with a movement. Not that I mind obviously. At this stage just want baby to be okay. Whichever way it is that's fine and for all I know it's still head down.

Sorry for the me me post all. Hopefully will be in a 'happy' mood tomorrow and will name check etc.

Hi Ladies,
Just checking in with you all to see the news. Still thinking of you louise and sending positive thoughts for healing your way. I can't imagine how hard it would be to hear a reason for your loss with all of the "what if's" that accompany it. I feel that it could also bring some sense to it instead of being unexplained as so many stillbirths are. So sad for you still and sending big hugs your way.

Welcome to our new gals, you're in a good spot for the journey ahead. I can hardly believe I have only 3 weeks left! Getting very excited to be snuggling my girl at home over Christmas! Lots of planning to do for my maternity leave substitute (school teacher) so trying to wrap that up this weekend...we'll see!

MW said baby hasn't dropped down yet and no dialation either, feel like she may be running a bit late...like her mum!

Sorry not to name check, should probably get back to planning! Take care all!

Sunday's List:

Unbuffy - baby#2 (1 DD) - 39+1 wks EDD 27th November
HappyGirl - baby#1 37+4 weeks EDD 8th December
Zayja - baby#1 36+6 wks EDD 11th December
Goodluckbear - baby#1 36+1 wks EDD 18th December
Malteser1981 - baby#1 36+1 wks EDD 18th December
Gilda - baby#1 - 35+1 wks due 25th December
BunnyBaby - baby#3 - 35+1 wks due 25th December
sparklyrainbow - baby#1 34+3 wks EDD 30th December
AlbaDeTamble - baby#2 (1DS, 3yrs) 33+6 wks EDD 3rd January. Next scan Dec 2nd
toomuchteaching - baby#1 33+4 wks EDD 5th January
Redheadgal - baby#1 33+2 wks EDD 6th January
diggingforvictory - baby#4 (DS 1) 32+1 wks EDD 15th January
WestYorkshireGirl - baby#1 31+6 weeks EDD January 18th
Dorcas111 - baby#1 30+2 weeks EDD 28th January
Ba8y1 - baby#1 29+2 weeks EDD 4th February
Clareanna - baby#2 one DS 28+2 weeks ADD 3rd Feb 2011
Muser - baby#1 26 weeks EDD 27th Feb
Northerngoldilocks - baby#1 23+2 weeks EDD 18 March
Magic8ballhastheanswers - babies#3&4 22+5 weeks EDD 20th March
Lia - baby#6 22+3 weeks EDD 23rd March
Hopefully - baby#2 21+3 weeks EDD 2nd April
stuffedmk - baby#2 20+6 weeks EDD 4th April
Osch - Baby#3 20 weeks edd 10th April
Ivysedai - baby#2 18+3 weeks EDD 21st April
PenguinsMummy - baby#3 18+3 weeks EDD 21st April
VivClicquot - baby#1 16+4 weeks EDD 4th May
Loopymumsy - baby#4 16+3 weeks EDD 5th May
Tigerbear - baby#1 14+6 weeks EDD 14th May
Wobblewatcher - baby#2, 8+5 weeks, EDD June 27
Inbetweener - baby#3, 6 weeks, EDD July 17th

crochetcircle - about 11 weeks
appleblossoms - about 10 weeks
emmywoo- about 6 weeks

The babies are arriving! Huge congratulations to:
Totally with daughter Faith Juliet, 9lb5oz born Tuesday 16th February 2010
Amyboo with son Matthew James, 4.714kg (10lb3oz) born Tuesday 30th March 2010
Hoops with son Benjamin Scott, 7lb4oz born Friday 2nd April 2010
Memorylapse with daughter Olivia, born Friday 16th April 2010
Jacanne with daughter Lotta Eliza, 8lbs 5oz born 20th April 2010
Becky78 with son Thomas Christopher born 22nd May, 9lb 1oz
Meita with son Ianto born 23 August, 7lbs 4
Boodleboot with daughter Alice Elizabeth born 10 Sep - 8lbs 2oz
LeeWT with son Andrew Anthony born 28th Sept 7lbs 14oz
TFLS with son Charlie born on 30th September, 6lbs 8oz
SamB with daughter Ruby Mae born 19th October, 7lbs 10oz
Effilump with son Arlen born 16th October, 8lbs
Sarahlou8 with daughter Emily Isabella born 21st October, 7lb8oz

In our thoughts and prayers:
Louise with daughter Georgie born asleep on 10th October

We share the pain and mourn the loss with:
Jollster, Cheepz, Freezing, BarrenBrook, MsJL, LadyBee, Moofold, Banana87, BatteryHen and HairyTriangle

A few days to add on for everyone -- quite possible I've messed this up, apologies to anyone if your dates have gone awry...

Hope everyone's having a lovely weekend

hi 8s (and all)

Thouroughly miserable and uncomfortable here so have been avoiding posting grumpy posts although thinknig of you all. Hundreds of branstons and top-of-bump contractions at times - eg fri night - then nada. nothing. big fat zilch. except feeling really uncomfortable and unable to sit still and emotional and just WAITING (and more knickerchecking than the 2ww!).

So nothing to report from here. Am lurking and keeping up but too depressed to namecheck - will say DITTO to TFLS' monster mammoth amazing namecheck and leave it at that!!

But will say congrats to Happy on the ecv - and take comfort in the fact that if it took 3 of them to turn the baby, it's unlikely to turn ITSELF back. So saying, they can be awkward sods when they want to be... still have my fingers crossed for you just in case.