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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Original poster

Help - first day of proper training but my son is like a leaking tap!

190 replies

tholeon · 10/04/2012 17:12

He is 2.10. The book says by this age he should be able to hold wees for about three hours. He had a drink around an hour ago and since then has done six wees , three in the potty (after prompting) and three in large puddles on the floor. Surely this isn't normal??? Even if he is trained we will spend our whole lives in the toilet. Me, him, and the baby. Hurrah. Or does he wee too much to be capable of training and will he therefore have to spend his whole life in nappies? And not go to the pre school he is due to start next term because they want him trained. .. And I am desperate for him to get to so I can get him out of my hair for a bit..

Stressed....

Make that four puddles on the floor...

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3duracellbunnies · 10/04/2012 19:14

Firstly the preschool may want him trained, but it is discriminatory to refuse him on those grounds. Maybe check that point on preschool or primary education board.

That aside, I'm afraid that my children didn't come with instruction manuals, but if they had they would have said that when we started potty training dd2 had a reservoir capable of servicing a small city, whereas ds had one the size of a fairy teasooon.

Despite this, as the days have gone by (now on day 11); he has been able to go for longer periods of time, up to an hour or so, and he has been progressively drier, no accidents for 48hrs, but two today.

If all else fails, send him in, tell them he needs to go frequently, and if he has accidents tell them they must be making it so exciting for him that he's slid back. It's not unusual for a child to be wet sometimes in a new and exciting environment. Try not to get too stressed, and see if anyone can give you something to quote at them if they get annoyed.

Original poster
tholeon · 11/04/2012 06:44

Ok thank you. we will keep going. Sort of don't want to make them take him if they don't want him how could anyone want my wonderful ds but we will see. Not experiencing this potty training business as a parenting highlight.

OP posts:
mamij · 11/04/2012 06:56

DD1 peed on the floor three times and once in the potty for two days before staying completely dry from day three onwards. However, she also started going every half an hour to an hour. Now (2.5 years old) she can stay dry for a couple of hours. Tbh, I think it's the novelty of being able to go on a potty/toilet that makes them go more often!

Agree that the nursery can't discriminate on whether a child is potty trained or not! On average, boys can take up to Dix years and girls four!

3duracellbunnies · 11/04/2012 07:48

(stealth boast alert) ds has just gone through the night with pants. He did a tiny wee on the potty when he woke in the night, but even when he woke up he could wait 10mins. This is fairy teaspoon boy! I started him after lunch on sat 30th, so that shows what progress your ds might make. If you can avoid pull-ups then do as I think it confuses them (that is why I've taken away night time nappy as he had some dry nights but yesterday he had some accidents after using nappy first thing). Having said that the nursery near up will take them in pull-ups and will ring you to come and change them if a poo. Sending dry day vibes your way!

Original poster
tholeon · 11/04/2012 13:32

Congrats to your ds, gives me hope ! Dh has a few days off so have put him in charge of pottyness.. Both boys responding quite well to praise about how well they are doing. Only on second pair of pants of the day, frequent parent led trips to potty though. How long did it take yours to ask to be taken?

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3duracellbunnies · 11/04/2012 14:17

Good plan! Though I do hold dh responsible for encouraging him to do standing up wees - on the potty, though ds alone is responsible for the concept of standing up poos! It probably took a few days for him to tell me, though he hasn't quite mastered past and present tense, so he will say 'I done a poo' when he actually means he wants to do a wee, but it effectively springs us into action. Your ds and dh sounds as if doing really well, a few damp channges of clothes is par for the course I think at this stage! Off to town, need to plan my route via places with loos, will bring travel potty just in case!

Original poster
tholeon · 13/04/2012 16:28

Hope town trip went well. Lots of progress here, yesterday ds announced he wanted to do a poo then actually did one in the potty. Only unfortunate thing is that dh has, helpfully, taught him to shout 'push' as he attempts to push one out.. So looking forward to a few mortifying moments in public toilets...

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3duracellbunnies · 13/04/2012 18:14

Blokes!! Town was fine, and even missed the downpour by strategically going for coffee (in the interests of accessible toilet facilities of course). Have gone cold turkey at night time too. Had two dry nights, last night was wet once, but it had been a wierd evening, with me at a+e most of the evening with dd2; she's fine but sporting a fetching dressing on her face for the return to school. He didn't settle, then we came back with some chinese food and he had a drink at about 8:30; before I had to dash back to a+e as blood was coming through bandage, dh therefore had to settle him, so by that time he may well have scrimped on the loo trips before he went to sleep. Basically though since he started to be dry at night he has been dry 2/9; which I think is a fairly good start.

I wonder what his preschool will make of his encouraging cheers! At least you can send him in with some confidence now, though he may still have a few accidents even if he is usually dry, but he sounds like he has cracked it, and a bit of a male bonding experience!

Original poster
tholeon · 13/04/2012 19:41

Eek, hadn't thought about sound commentary at preschool..

Poor you and dd, glad she is ok. Sounds like your ds has done really well though.

Kind of worried about loud and urgent announcement of need to poo in tescos, but I guess you work these things out..

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3duracellbunnies · 13/04/2012 19:49

We've all been there, one of my friends taught her girl all proper terms, great until age 3.5 she announced to all of tescos that she had an itchy vagina!

He'll soon realise that it's just he and daddy who like to give a running commentary!

ewaczarlie · 14/04/2012 14:01

Love this conversation! Have been having a little giggle reading it. I'm only on day 2 and slowly it's getting better (though I have succumbed to nappy for naps and poos as DS is getting quite stressed at the thought of pooing in potty. I'll see how this approach goes, most of all I want him happy and confident using the potty not stressed out (mind you I will have a serious chocolate addiction to deal with as all potty trips come with a demand for chocolate not the inferior sticker on offer - is it wrong to bribe with chocolate?)

Calamityboo · 14/04/2012 14:59

I have really loved this thread! We are on day 1, 6 accidents, no pee on the potty, he does not seem to have a stop valve anywhere! He does know he is peeing and does not like to be wet. Please tell me there is hope?

snowpuma · 14/04/2012 15:06

Remember what a big deal it is for them, sounds like you guys are doing really well already. Apparently some children take months but you are already making good progress. One day you suddenly realise they've had no accidents for a few days and rejoice! then another day you realise they are telling you when they need to go and you don't need to prompt... then you get caught out and they have an accident cos you didn't prompt! :) Fun all round. Doesn't last long though.

3duracellbunnies · 14/04/2012 16:21

Ds is getting better at turning it off, but had a bit of a manic morning at the cinema. Ds and dd1 were hot desking with the travel potty, each claiming to be more desperate than the other, then decided only the real toilet would do, so all had to dash out. Did mean I got to miss some of alvin and the very annoying chipmonks. Ds then announced 3min from home that he needed the potty, so had all three chanting in the back 'wait wee wee, wait wee wee' while I avoided the boys in blue. Generally though it has got better and now (2 weeks in) he tells us, the only time I prompt is just before we go out (but I still have to do that for dh + girls so nothing new)!

Having to consider bribing him not to sit on potty at night, just after lights out he wants to sit on 4 or 5 times in 20min to break his own world record for smallest poo and wee. Still at least we had another dry night!

Minshu · 14/04/2012 16:29

After 6 accidents on day 1, have put dd back in a nappy :(

3duracellbunnies · 14/04/2012 17:27

Everyone feels like that on day 1 Minshu, try again tomorrow when she isn't as tierd. It takes time for them to learn that the old way has gone. Ds was like that 2 weeks ago, but 2 weeks on and he is dry most of the time, day and night.

Calamityboo · 14/04/2012 17:54

We are on our 9th pair of pants today, and ds has....... wait for it.......... DONE A WEE ON THE POTTY!!!!!!!! Grin Day one a success if you count wet carpet, living room smelling of wee and a grumpy toddler a success

3duracellbunnies · 14/04/2012 17:56

Horray for clamityboo jnr!

Original poster
tholeon · 14/04/2012 20:46

Well done calamity!

Minshu this is our second attempt. We tried a few weeks ago but it was the wrong time: new baby too young and I think ds is also a lot more ready than he was. He went out for breakfast and to the playground with daddy this morning and came back in same pair of pants, so pretty pleased with them both. How old is your dc? Have they done pre training training? Ds has been wee ing in the potty before the bath etc for some time, but till this tuesday has been in nappies.

3durrecellbunnies yep we are getting some toileting procrastination here too, now he has worked out it is a surefire way to get attention..

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Calamityboo · 14/04/2012 21:02

Well calamity Jr is off to bed, in nappy, time to open Wine and survey the damage. In total 11 changes, 1 potty wee, 1 poo started in his pants and finished on the potty. But we did have dry nap! Washing machine and tumble working hard ready for tomorrow. We tried pre training, always put on the loo before his bath, he just never did a thing :( ready for the procrastination to begin.

Minshu · 14/04/2012 21:23

Thanks for the replies :) Hope we have a similar experience 3duracellbunnies :)

Calamity - we too are feeling much calmer having opened the vino. How old is jr?

DD is 2.6 and has been showing an interest and having lots of wees and a poo in the potty or toilet for several months. DP and I weren't ready until now due to having major work done on house (including a period with no washing machine Shock), moving DD into her new room with a proper bed and a holiday involving long hours in the car. We now have a few clear weeks coming up without any major upheavals, so I thought time should be right.

I know DD is able to recognise what is going on and has been physically capable of holding on until getting to the toilet in the past. Accidents today have generally followed shortly after a successful trip to the toilet (or while too busy doing something interesting), so I think it may be that she's feeling too much pressure so wanting to get off before she should.

Tomorrow is another day :) Will try more bribery - lots of easter egg left.

dontcallmehon · 14/04/2012 21:25

I sympathise. Ds is a similar age and pooed three times on the floor today. Gave up and stuck a nappy back on. He could poo for the Olympics that boy!

Calamityboo · 14/04/2012 21:44

Hi Minshu, he is also 2.6, he knows what it is all about, what goes where etc, with limited results on potty and toilet time so we thought we would just get on and go for it. This is the first time I think I have been brave and organised enough to do it, still shocked at how hard it is, and frustrating. Wine clearly the way forward!

I think, dontcallme, if he had poo'd more than once I would have also had to put a nappy back on him!

WineWineWine for all pee soaked potty mums Grin

QueenSconetta · 15/04/2012 07:45

Hi all, invited to this thread by Calamityboo. I am also pee soaked and poo stained training DD (2.4). We are now on day 5 but had a dry night after her insistence she wasn't wearing a pull up to bed - hooray.

I am hardcore - I had gin not wine last night. :)

Wishing you all a dry day, x

3duracellbunnies · 15/04/2012 08:09

Well done, we have gone for the double with ds too, he was usually dry in the morning, and seemed more confused by having had a pull up on. No going back now. I have put a double layer of waterproof sheet, sheet, waterproof sheet sheet, so if we have any night time accidents I don't need to search for bedding.

ds upstairs with dh, always their weak moment, and worse, I think they are putting away washing, will need to go before I have to spend weeks finding where they have put them!