Fab Feb 2009 bar: toddle on in, grab a pew: mummy's in need of a drink or two...

[dinkystinky]

New thread for us to natter on about our toddling terrors... complete with some virtual booze. Mine's a french martini....

thom If it has anything to do with ds1, it won't be too long before Luke says cake. lol

That is brilliant THOM

Danny's word for Cake is "aaurhpbabaeeee" with lots of vigorous pointing and grabbing actions

must be a fab feb trait this love of cake... A just stole ds1's fruit cake

it's great fun having a chatty baby isn't it? dd and ds1 both talked very early... have to say i miss it a bit with A, we're still only getting warbles and wails out of him.... puncuated by the occasional 'mam', 'dada' and 'baba'.

please can someone direct me to dinkys thread i feel left out!

TITS!
Izzy doesnt talk much either She chatters away in her own little language mostly when she is on the phone more like gibberish
She says dada, see ya!, hiya, bye, nose, mowf and baff SHe never says mama

MOS tee hee netmums! you know I actually joined before i found mumsnet, I posted on feb 09 for a while I still see one of them in real life regularly who is lovely but didnt really get n with others.

Littlesez - you're really not missing out, honest. Only TITS and SM and a couple of others posted - just wanted to share my amusement with Danny's way of ordering things. Will try and do a link for you tomorrow when at work (cant link on Mac). Loving Izzy's vocab - esp the baff (good northern lass) Danny's new word is "da" (for there) - he says it whenever he gives you something or directs you where he wants something to go. Is hilarious.

aww dinky sounds cute, babies really are the best ever! I really love the cute things they do.

Izzy has a Whats this? obsession only she says "tit" Hubby finds it highly amusing of course

Had a rough day at work today and asked my assistant coach "how can I calm down" She told me to think of Izzy

littlesez Ds1 didn't say mamma until he was 2 years old!

Luke is quite a vocal child. He can only really say mamma (or maman as he says) and dadda, ta and everything else are grunts and screams. He knows what he's on about and I think ds1 does sometimes too, but I haven't a clue.
When I talk to him, he copies the sylables(sp?) with babbles, so won't be long.
Ds1 said "dadda" at about 7 months and then "car" at 16 months.

dd said mama at 7 months, cat and dada a week later and hasn't shut up since. ds1 wasn't much slower than her. I wouldn't be as pushed about A's speech if he babbled properly but he doesn't so it's quite hard to grasp what he wants when everything is just a series of grunts and wails ho-hum though, he walked early so he was bound to be slow at something else.... I'd take non verbal over dd's not walking til close to 15 months anyday [sore back emoticon]

Lol at your chatty DD Tulips. DH was convinced DS1 wasnt saying daddy for ages - turned out he was he was saying "gaggy". Finally got a speech therapist to see him last weekend (gave up on NHS and went private in the end) and it turns out (now aged 4) that DS1 simply cant make "d" and "t" noises - he tries to make the noise from the back of his mouth rather than the front so it comes out as "g" and "k" - so he will need speech therapy to help him sort out his speaking. Just wish the bloody therapist I saw when he was 3 on the NHS who told me not to worry had picked up on that Oh well, this therapist is great and DS1 really connected with her so at least hopefully we'll have progressed some before he starts reception.

We're extremely lucky in that our fantastic local health nurses referred A ages ago so he's already on the SALTs patient list. She's seen him once and will review him at 18 months (and tbh he's making no more sounds now than he was 3 months ago so there's a fair chance he won't be doing much by then either) She seems really on the ball and it was her that referred us to a specialist ENT team for the tongue tie.

Tulips - that's great that your services are so good and A is on the list already. School said if DS1 is referred to a SALT via the school he'll go on the special needs register which seemed abit drastic so thought we'd try private therapy first.

A sounds really like Danny - right down to the little tantrums. This morning Danny was trying to put some mini choc eggs (my easter present from DH to me!) in the bin in the kitchen - I told him no and he sat down on the floor and had a full on tantrum. Then toddled off to hide behind his nice nanny who didnt tell him off. Ho hum. Bet she would have stopped him though if they were her chocolates he was binning....

lots of babbling with a few definite words from I but nowhere near as verbal as DD at this age. 'Car', 'ball', 'tiger' and a sort of 'dada' but no real attempt at mum as far as i can tell.

I has had bad bum for a few days. it sort of got progressively worse so i didn't do anything about it to begin with but have kept him off all but liquids for a day. he still had a dreadful nappy this morning despite nothing but water and diarolyte since yesterday lunchtime. i guess if it carried on i'll have to go to the GP but i can't think what they'll be able to do? he also had his 12 month booster and mmr on tues poor thing.

apart from also having mini meltdowns he seems ok in himself.

on the toddler feng shui note he decided to remove the empty toothpaste tube from the bathroom bin and put my alarm clock in there instead this morning. how helpful he is.

Dinky sorry to hear about DS1's speech issues, hopefully you can make some progress now but at both it being missed by NHS and that it would potentially mean special needs at school. thank goodness you've taken some action now, hope he makes great progress with it.

thom Mr T's conversation with regional accents is hilarious.

has everyone voted yet? i decided to do it before work which is probably lucky otherwise i might have felt the need to give ukip a sympathy vote following the plane crash!

Morning all - How is I doing today KBN? Danny periodically gets tummy bugs like that - could be related to his jabs. Hope he perks up soon. Loving the alarm clock story Went to vote on way home from work yesterday - had to wait in a queue for 10 minutes due to idiotic system employed by the polling station (despite there being open booths) and they seemed to be running low on polling papers. Amazes me how shambolic elections can be! Was v close run in our seat - Labour held by only .1 of a percent of the vote. Wonder what will happen if a new election is called within a year due to the hung parliament...

Hope everyone else is good. Danny seems to be coming down with something or another growth spurt - sleep is awful (have gone back to doing dream feeds again to try to stop days starting at 4am). Anyone else's little one appear to be going through this? Weighed him today - the little monkey weighs nearly 2 stone!

Afternoon all.
Hope I and Danny are both a bit better.
Not much happening here, we've been to play-group this morning. Luke walked all the way there (only about 5 mins away)
The boys are just finishing lunch now and then we're all going back to bed after a shocker of a night

well after having mastitis myself all week i'm finally feeling human... unfortuantely ds1 spent all last night puking his guts up and is now collapsed on the couch. A has fallen asleep face down in his playpen... very unlike him so expecting pukage from that direction soon too. Supposed to be having dd's friend round today so her mother can prepare for her birthday party tomorrow but i guess it wouldn't help much to give the birthday girl a vomiting bug would it? better cancel... dd will go mad

Supposed to be at the playschool now collecting the fees.... can't get out the door!

Oh no TITS - sounds like you are going to have one of those days. Hope A doesn't go down with what DS1 has. Glad you are on the road to recovery from the mastitis, though.

SM cannot believe Luke walked to playgroup!!! Do you have him on reins? What about Jacob - he doesn't go running off? Hope you all have a lovely nap and catch up on some shut-eye.

Dinky - another one here going through some sort of growth/development phase! I'm getting a bit fed up of the early starts TBH - today was 5am after a disturbed night, so by the time I took Sam to nursery, he was getting all shouty because he needed to go back to sleep! I went to vote yesterday at just after 7am because DH was out last night - I was the only one there! Sounds like there were some real problems though in some places - not something you relish after a hard day's work. Will be watching news with excitement though... until I fall asleep!

KBN - hope I doing ok? (I still have to read your posts a couple of times with thte "I"!!!). Sam had his MMR last week and his skin's been a bit of a mess since, poor chap. A bit of chatter from Sam, he says "mama" whilst honding onto my legs, "duck" "car" "Nina" (for DD) and we swear we heard him say "puter" this morning while he was running for the laptop!

Finding things quite hard with DD at the moment - she's getting more and more distressed in social situations and being very agressive towards Sam at the moment. The poor chap is desperate for her to notice him and take the shoe, or toy or whatever he's bought over as a gift! She just screams "No Sam" and pushes him over. We have a Portage worker coming round on Wednesday morning for an observation. She said the main this is to bring DD's anxiety levels down - I'm off to the GP on Monday to try to bring mine down! No really, I'm finding it hard to deal with and getting upset that she's not "normal" (at the moment) and I don't want to make it any worse for her..... Anyway, this weekend DH and I are both spending some one to one time with her to try to win some affection from her!

Lunchtime here now - a bit sad here because one of the ladies we work with, the boss's wife, has just been diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer and she's off the the Royal Marsden tomorrow for agressive treatment . Not a good prognosis.

Still no news from my Caterpillar running brother.....

STW i'm so sorry to hear things aren't going well with DD and that you're suffering too. i really hope you get some good advice from the Portage worker and i think it's very important that you get help for yourself asap. big hugs for you all.

Ivor (probably easier than using I....it made it sound like i was boasting about my own ability to say the word 'car' the other day!!) has still got dreadful squits. he didn't eat anything yesterday but still went loads. i gave him a piece of bread this morning (which i've never seen him be so grateful for) and literally 5 mins later it was straight through (sorry about TMI). i then had to get some out of his nappy and into a sample jar, having been at a wine tasting do at the pta last night i wasn't feeling my best and this just tipped me over the edge. cue me being sick with both dcs in attendance and a running commentary from dd 'mummy, put your head over the toilet, mummy, put your hair out of the way, ivor don't be happy it's not nice for mummy, mummy have you done sick now?'!!

i hope all the other sickly kids get better soon.

STW - sorry to hear things are still really difficult: they will get better, please hold on to that thought - and reality - while things are really hard. Have you posted on the Special Needs board on here about your experiences? From what I can tell from other boards, there are some v experienced mums there who would probably be able to relate to you and how you're feeling right now and help reassure you and let you know what helped them and their DC. Awful news about your colleague - that poor woman and her poor family. Maybe your caterpillar brother is still running the marathon

KBN - oh no, your morning sounds horrible! Hope your day improves from hereon in. Poor I.

Thanks Ladies!

Just packing up to go home but checked in and then felt rather ill myself when I read KBN's post!!! Very at the wine tasting though - I assume you swallowed !!

Dinky - been lurking on the SN boards but didn't want to post until we get "observed" next week in case I'm a fraud .

Hope you all have lovely weekends - I just want some sleep!

STW I'm sure all the people on the SN board would be more than happy to talk through yours and their experiences without thinking you're a fraud!
You may find posting your thoughts and experiences is quite reassuring.

I'm having a day off today. Dp got up with the boys and I was hoping for the whole day in bed.
Luke of course was being a whinge-bag and I had to get up when I heard dp shout "fucking shut up" at my 15 month old baby
But then I took Luke into bed with me and we napped together, he then got up at about 9am and i stayed in bed until midday.
Dp has now taken the boys to tesco to get some bread, and I have told him I am not cooking today and we will all have dinner from the chippy tonight.
I just can't be bothered to do anything. I'm feeling really run-down atm, have a sore throat, a bad cough, stinging eyes, back ache and runny nose.
Dp goes back on nights at work on tuesday. For 4 weeks. WTF am I going to do with the kids for 4 weeks?

SM glad you got your time in bed even if it did involve a small boy for some of it. you'll cope when dp goes back on nights, you know you will but right now if you're feeling crap it will feel like a much bigger mountain. i hope you feel better and maybe dp can help out with the boys again tomorrow or is it time for a visit to your dad's?

STW i've been brought up not to spit things out so i thought it would be impolite to do anything other than drink all the wine we were offered! a carb heavy lunch yesterday soon put me right but today i've felt a bit like i've caught a touch of ivor's bug.
he was still bad after his bread this morning but he was so cross about being hungry this afternoon we gave him some breadsticks at about 5pm and he's now in bed with no sign of anything untoward...fingers crossed he's clear now as it's been a week. he's still got his lovely round tummy though.

i hope everyone is having a good weekend and aren't too cold!

hi all, so sorry so many of you are having a bad time at the moment with so many sickly little ones, hope they are all better by now.

STW, was thinking about you and your DD the other day when I read a very very old parenting magazine which I discovered out here. There was a small article about a girl who just wouldn't talk and it was recommended that the mum (and dad) do lots of singing with her, nursery rhymes etc and when out and about make a point of talking about everything they saw. Seemed to work in her case and eventually she came out of her shell in public. I do hope you manage to get her diagnosed and hopefully work on a treatment. Fingers crossed it is something as simple as just shyness in public that she will grow out of.

SM sorry you are feeling so low. I can understand how you feel about being on your own for 4 weeks at night (and most of the days as no doubt he will want to sleep all day and you will have to keep the boys quiet) hope you manage to get through it ok.

I totally understand how you feel about your DP shouting and swearing at J (or was it L?) DH did that a month or so ago when H was ill and I really lost it. We had a HUGE row earlier in the week just before bedtime and the next day was horrible but then since then and over the weekend (our thurs/fri) we seemed much more amicable, it was as if we'd said what was on our chests and were getting somewhere.
He does however then spoil it by losing his temper with the kids (meal times are the worse as DD would try the patience of a saint) and he has a short fuse.

I have a difficult decision to make. The local nursery (attached to the local school we'd like DD to go to as it seems unlikely we can afford private) has offered her 3 full days (Tues, Wed, Thurs) which was what we'd asked for but initially were told we'd get Mon and Fri and maybe a half day. Had pretty much decided that if didn't get days I wanted I'd stay here but now they have offered what we want and I have until 17th to accept or decline.
Am lying awake most nights trying to decide what is for the best. Part of me wants to stay here as kids settled but for how long? I'd quite like to stay until next summer then we'd know for definite if DD has a place at the primary school we want. Am worried if I go home now, she goes to nursery and then doesn't get a place at that school, it will be really unsettling for her and once I leave here, there is no going back.

Anyway, enough of me and my indecisiveness (sp?) going to cheer myself up in an hour and watch the spanish grand prix
Hope everyone is having a nice weekend x

mos It is a very tough decision to make. Tbh, I don't really think you can base your decision purely on dd's nursery/school placements.
Can you live another year with your (D)h? Can your children live another year with him?
I know it sounds silly, but have you written a pros and cons list? Ages ago, when I was seriously thinkiing of leaving dp, one of the things on my cons list was that I loved the bedroom curtains and wanted to stay with them , but writting it all down, might help you decide on what you are willing to put up with for the next year in order to wait for ds1 to finish school, for securing dd2 a school place etc etc.
Maybe the fact that ds1 gets his education paid for completely cancels out your dh shouting at dinner time, maybe it doesn't.

When I hit a bad patch with dp, the reason I stay is

1. because I do love him
2. because he loves me
3. I am certain he will learn how to be a great father as the boys get older
4. he is a good provider
5. he has helped me grow (not in the rotund sense, but when we first started out, he made me want to be a better person, which I am now)
6. It may take him some time, but he always comes through when we need something (like finding us somewhere to live)

and a few others.
For the most part, I am willing to let it slide that he doesn't help me much with the kids, that sometimes he losses his temper and shouts, because i think the good things about him are worth more than the bad things iyswim.

I don't have any words of wisdom and have no idea what you should do.
I hope you can come to a decision soon x

SM you do have many wise words of wisdom for someone young enough to be my daughter
PMSL though ref your curtains. FFS woman, take them with you if that is all that is keeping you there! Unlike me (shortarse!) you are tall enough to reach them without a ladder so grab them and run if you feel like that again

we did have a good few days after our really nasty argument but he gets so stressful at mealtimes. Might try feeding kids first and then we can eat afterwards whilst they are watching a dvd.

It was when i was pregnant with Luke, before we got back on-line.
We'd not long moved in and the bedroom curtains were the firsth thing we bought to start making this place our own.

The thing with my dp is that he didn't have a constant father figure when he was growing up so no one taught him how to be a Dad.
He had a crap mum too so probably not much affection was shown anywhere.

The main thing that worries me, is that J and L are going to learn how to be a father from dp and atm, it isn't always what I'd like.
Me and dp are just really different in our ideas. For example, I do the counting thing with Jacob but c onting to 3 isn't enough, so when he is messing around or doing something naughty, I tell him "I am going to count to 5, if you are not standing next to me when I get to 5, you will go to the naughty corner"
I see this as giving J long enough to comply, dp looks at it as a chance to tell J off.
The boys adore their father and he adores them. Atm, I can give enough positive attention to hopefully over-ride some of the negative they get from dp and like I said earlier, I am confident things will improve as the boys get older and become more interesting.

I think that's a great ideda about feeding the dc's earlier and you and dh eating later. It completely removes that opportunity for negative behaviour from your dh.
If you can remove the reasons for his temper flaring up, you might find the next year easier to bear out (if you are going to stay. Again, that doesn't mean I think you should stay, or go, I don't know what you should do)