May 09 - The Sleepless Babies Club, All Dubious Fashions Welcome

[Grumpyoldcaaaaaaaa]

Ladies.

flippin, I think the councellor will help a great deal with confidence-boosting. at least mine did.

and, I agree with llare about clothes, makeup, etc. it helps me so much to pay attention to myself once in awhile (not that I do these days ).

dandy, I'll echo others' teen favourites like Judy Blume, loved Lois Duncan, Robert Cormier as well. I also read a lot of Victoria Holt/Philippa Carr.

IMO, 3 chapters with a big flashback sounds tiring to me but then I wouldn't mind so much if it were relevant to the story. It's really hard to say without reading it.... would you like some of us to preview it ?

TTC, oh, how lucky of you all who are even thinking of ttc. . I can't wait to hear of the 1st one and will be insanely .

That's so great of your DH. As long as that's what you really want of course. How many dcs did he have in mind, btw? All the children sounds like quite a lot of them

DH and I had always said at least three children, maybe more - although it's hard to imagine at the moment! I think I want to stay at home, but it's hard to get my head round as it wasn't an option until recently, iyswim. TTC wouldn't make sense right now though, I need to sort myself out a bit really. Although I am broody, I love being pregnant .

Evening momiyounger!

I know I need to pay more attention to myself, just doesn't seem to be any time! Perhaps if I stopped wallowing on here and had a bath instead that would be a good start. Bugger, that came out all wrong - makes it sound like I never wash! I do, honest , but if I had a bath I could shave my legs

Meant to say too that I really cannot think of A as my last baby.

flippin I know what you mean about not being able to think of A as your last baby. I aways have this feeling that one day there will be another. re confidence Clothing definitely is a big thing. A nice outfit/new hairdo always makes you feel better.

hi younger. dandy* I forgot to answer your 3 flash back question. I also think that it might be too much, but it all depends on how it's written and how it fits in the story, because if the story flows nicely then it should not be a problem.

Fi/Pula hope you're feeling better.

belg, exciting about your AP coming soon!

periods, not had any yet here either. have been feeding 3x a day with a few odd feeds thrown in lately for comfort (cold and teething).

I've just dropped the afternoon feed, she's had her 1st ever bottle of formula! seemed a bit suspicious at first then drank about 2/3. I was going to give it to her in a cup but she couldn't figure out the spout thingy so I just gave in to the bottle.

So, I'll be feeding her just first thing in the morning and last thing at night. perhaps my pd will return soon .

ses, i'm off to check out the link...

flippin- I think my S makes a very good youngest child and although I also loved being pg, I feel like i've been there, done that. I don' enjoy the early months and don't think i could do that again. Also, I worry about getting PND again, as I think I know what triggered it this time, and it's too much of a risk. Can you tell I'm trying to stop myself getting broody

When I say the early months, I mean the early months with the baby, although it also applies to pg - morning sickness, tiredness, not being able to tell people you are pg...

xposted!
belgina and flip, it's lovely to hear about your thoughts on future children. I'm so sad that we won't have more but I'm 40 and tired (and DH is now sterile!) so that's it.

pula, ikwym - I think harper makes a good youngest child as well .

mug of chamomile finished, time to go to sleep. good night, all!

Hi all. Wow, lots to catch up on this week.

Firstly, HtH, am also at your FIL. Must be very difficult for you all.

Flippin, re confidence, I always feel short of time to do things and then I get panicky that everyone is doing more / better / is just generally superior to me... because I feel overwhelmed by all the stuff I know I should be doing but I'm not... To shake it, I sometimes just make a huge effort to get one thing done that's been bothering me (from plucking my eyebrows to doing the recycling) and then I feel better. Oh, and sometimes I make faces at myself in the mirror until I make myself laugh for being so ridiculous... try it?!

periods ha ha ha... I got mine on Tuesday when in London for work. Now, you will all laugh (because I'm a fool) but I had been concerned I might have been pregnant. I say concerned, but I had no reason to be, because I'd been exclusively BF until end Nov, been on the mini pill from about August, oh, and only had sex once in about October!!!! But the week before we did the deed I'd randomly forgotten 3 minipills and not bothered to catch up as I thought there was no chance of any action plus I'd not been Bfing as I'd erm, had a couple of tipsy nights.... so, theoretically it could have happened but was a one in a million chance. I didn't think much more about it until I came off the minipill at Christmas because we got snowed in... and I waited and waited and waited... and now it's all ok, phew.

Like LadyH and Ses, (I think, on the wrong page now) we will def be ttc later in the year but it was so immediate last time that I need to leave it until August just in case. Would also like to rediscover a sex life first, sigh! And I'm sure DH would too!

Dandy - books... I had exactly the same background as Llare and unsurprisingly pretty much the same reading taste:
'Children of the Dust',
similarly 'Empty World'
topically 'The Catcher in the Rye'
multiple Georgette Heyers (still love love love them, my favourite feel good books!!)
Cynthia Voigt I remember as being very good
KM Peyton too. It wasn't all Flambards...

I'm sure I'll remember more... one English teacher parent, one journalist and a Saturday / holiday job in a bookshop while I was growing up made reading inevitable!

Belgina pleased you've found a good AP

youngermomi I cried when I left F for his first full day although I'd left him several times previously. Weird.

Must stop and go to bed. DH away so am in sole charge of the menagerie and am working tomorrow.

muddled, thanks for your note about staying overnight with work, it was very reassuring. It was ok actually and am starting to remember who I used to be pre F. Just need to balance that with who I am now and life will be sorted. If only it was that easy... Next time I will take my gym things and make the most of time on my own by using the hotel gym. Because not BFing equals gaining weight, bugger!!

Must stop and go to bed. DH away so am in sole charge of the menagerie and am working tomorrow. And F still not v well and up every night.

hello to all those I haven't namechecked.

(I know, just call me Tolstoy. Or Penny Vincenzi.)

aaagh, lots of crossed posts.

I agree with younger, lovely conversation around children by pula, belgina, and flip. Funny how we're all at different stages. 4 though belgina, you're so brave! I have all on coping with one!

Oh, younger, you do sound sad about no more babies - but you have three beautiful girls and you're making the most of H's babyhood.

must sleep...

I love Penny Vincenzi.

[still feeding g]

Morning all.

Just logging on as the lap top is disappearing in about an hour as there is a problem with the link to DH's work that needs fixing so I don't know when I will be able to get on again, so I may not see you for a week

Another exhausting night. At least 3 put backs for each DS and DH upstairs again, and out at the gym this morning. Tonight I think I need to sit down and talk about it with him and put dandy's suggestions to him.

Anyway, got to go and get DS1 ready for school, change Rs stinky nappy and so on...

But I need to add my fav teen book (or rather series) I loved The OUtsiders by SE Hinton. They made it in to a film in the mid 80s with all the brat pack in. I would read it, finish it and then start it again.

See you all soon.

xxxx

Morning!

headless - Rumble Fish by SE Hinton was good too. Sorry to hear about your rubbish night, and boo to no laptop for a week!

I didn't read Catcher in the Rye until I was 18 I think, and was not all that bothered about it either. I loved Sylvia Plath when I was teenager too, being all moody and trying to be cool reading poetry! I read and reread the Bell Jar a lot, that and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (still my favourite ever book, and in my top ten of films).

Thank you all for all your reassurances that toddlers are hard. They are just so determined, aren't they?

i went out last night and it was FAB! not only to catch up with my pal who i'd not seen since just after G was born but also the film was great. Went to see Avatar.. my kind of thing. great effects but have to admit i got a bit bored with the length of the fighting though

my teenage reads were eclectic.. science fiction and fantasy stuff.. eg Dune.. Children of Dune, Daggerspell series by Katharine Kerr, Raymone E Feist and David eddings etc. Virginia Andrews, Georgette Heyer, Janet Daily (calder series) and Lucy Walker (her romances were set in oz and nz and gave me the desire to emigrate from my mid teens). i never got into agatha christie even now but do love kathy reichs.. there are more.. but those are the 1st to spring to mind..

right vats of tea needed (ds was up at 5.45am) as wasn't asleep until after midnight. - i'd love to be a test reader too dandy if you want more opinions..

going to have to boot up laptop it takes me ages to write posts when i'm using my phone! morning flippin&headless

oh no headless no laptop.. disaster! lots of sympathy too as your night sounds rubbish.. and i agree your dh is being unfair wrt spare room & gym. he has a family and can't expect to live the life of a child free couple.. things have to change or you'll end up ill with exhaustion. on nights that my dh has work the next day i normally deal with the dc's night waking as he is up at 5am and off to work by 5.45am. on the rest of the nights / am's he pitches in as and when needed.if ds gets up as he's getting ready for work he'll do his best to deal with him before he leaves in the hope i can sleep a bit longer..

mornong all.

First night of dh being away and gosh did C an I sleep?! She 1st woke at 3 as usual then 6 as usual, but rather than staying awake from then like we have done this week thanks to DH's alarms/snoring/tossing and turning we both went back to sleep. I then woke at 8.15 and had to rush rush to get the dcs to school.

ses I saw the BF thing too. THere was a big todo about it on this natural parenting forum I visit sometimes. The so called expert was someone who once upon a time was a midwife in the 80's who's clearly not up to date with her knowledge and clearly doesn't understand why women bf until past the age of 1. A real bf specialist would not have compared bm to coke Some people got in touch with the NMC because this woman is calling herself a mw, even though she is not. The mum that was there was clearly very amused by some of the things that woman came out with. I think that what lot of people get wrong is that bf a toddler/preschool age child is the same as bf a baby, but it's not. It's a totally different relationship. I bf 1x until 19m and 1x until 2y and never set out to bf so long. It just sort of happened because the dcs liked it so much and I didn't want to take something they enjoyed so much and that was actually quite good for them away from them before they were ready to stop themselves.

Time to go now. C wants a feed and then need to get ready to take DS to his bedwetting app't. (will definitely print out map this time + take phone number )

dandy I love reading. I'd love to be a test reader too

fly-by post:

ladyH, flippin, loved SE Hinton books esp Outsiders (better than the film).

back laytahhhh

Morning!

Belgina - CBC certainly shouldn't be allowed to call herself a MW if she's not a member of an accredited organisation anymore. I thought the mum came across really well. Wonder if she's a MNer!

Fi - yay for night out!

LadyH - oh no! Get that laptop back quick!

Reading - my controlling protective mum would check what books I was reading and wouldn't let me near most teen fiction, especially Judy Blume. I remember though being away on Guide camp one summer and borrowing a friend's to read
Was quite funny when my maternal grandmother decided to lend me her Danielle Steele, Barbara Taylor Bradford and Penny Vinceni books!
I did still read quite a lot though and enjoyed Agatha Christies and some classics like Jane Austen, Dickens etc. My favourite book has to be To Kill a Mockingbird.

belgina yay at not being disturbed by dh's snoring and alarms!

only read the outsiders i think out of SE Hintons books.. ooo and some Stephen King & james herbert too.. The Rats scared me silly