July 2008- The wonderful/ whingey Ones! - Delete as approriate!

[pigleychez]

Shiney new thread now our Bubbas are One.

The wonderful/Whingy Ones!

Hi Bebe. I wouldn't necessarily think they meant anything derogatory, but it sound from your post like you are bothered by P's behaviour anyway. She's just being a toddler, but I would not put up with the hitting and scratching. If O starts that (and she does!) I hold both her hands in one of mine and say 'No!'. If she tries to hit again, I do it again. And again. It gets rather boring but I don't know any other way to do it. I do also remove her from a situation and take her to a quiet corner, so that she can't get to join in the fun for a few minutes.

You're probably really aware of it, but other people aren't so bothered. TBH, as long as an excitable toddler isn't harming another child, I'm pretty relaxed about it, as they all have good and bad days behaviour-wise. Is there something in particular that your DH does that you can copy from him, since she seems to respond to it? Although some of that is because he isn't her primary carer so she might not feel as able to take liberties with him You know what they say, it's the people they are most relaxed with that chldren are most badly-behaved for - witness how children become wingless angels for grandparents, having had horns and a tail for their parents moments before

O scared the life out of my childminder today. She'd taken O, her own 1-yo and another 2-yo she minds to toddler group. They suddenly realised they couldn't see O - cue mad searching despite the fact they knew she couldn't have got out as the doors are locked for this very reason. As my CM was just thinking 'Oh my god, where is she?' they heard a little giggle.....

O was hiding behind the floor length curtains, obviously listening to everyone trying to find her!!

Poledra - Very funny girl! My P would think that was funny too & you just can't stay mad at them!

DH has a certain 'tone' when he tells her off that she doesn't like & subsequently stops. I can't emulate this, I have tried but his voice is obviously lower than mine & I just sound silly when I try! I always do the holding her hands & telling her 'no' but it usually makes her worse. Screaming, kicking & trying to bite me to let go of her!! She is very independant & strong willed but can be so loving which makes you forget why you were cross with her! Desperately hoping it is a phase, just seems to have been getting worse recently!

bebe - I wouldn't fret too much, but you do need to make sure Phoebe knows there are boundaries of acceptable behaviour. If you deal with the hitting etc now it will be easier than when she is older. She is bright and clever and obviously capable of getting her own way. It's only natural that she wants her own way!! You need to help her understand that other people have needs too. You can say things like "that hurts mummy" and you have to say it with a serious face. NO laughing!! Practise your serious face in the mirror if need be. It also helps to make eye contact and be without distractions - perhaps if she is naughty at playgroup you could take her outside for a little chat before going back in.

Thanks guys, will persevere with the telling her everytime. Sometimes she will burst into tears, want a hug & when I pick her up she does it again! It is mortifying when she does it in public!

Bebe- I agree that you need to be consistant. If she thinks she can get away with when you out then she will!

It maybe be embarrasing but im sure most of the parents there will have been through the same at some point.

Abigail has been doing bit of the hitting lately and I always say "no hitting mummy!" in a stern low voice. Thankfully they are only light pats anyway as opposed to full on slaps!
When shes having a strop, she often throws herself on the floor having a moan. I tend to ignore her for a few minutes, then say "finished" with which she realises its not working says yes and gets up like nothing had ever happened! Madam.
Although not always easy when shes out. Then I try distraction instead.

Poledra- O sounds like so funny. How cheeky!

hi all apologies ive not read posts no pc or laptop only my phone, only for a few days more, i hope your all ok ive so missed this thread, samuels recovering lovely, seeing cardiologist in the morning so fingers crossed. Il catch up soon x

HI All,

Hope everyone is well. PG ladies cooking nicely.

Had a run of virus infections here again . Calvin has had horrendous temp and flu ish symptoms for 4 days but seems to be better today thank goodness. The lack of sleep thing is dragging me down. Amber had her swine flu jab yesterday - she was so brave, no crying or anything and she is fine - no probs at all. C is getting his in Feb. He still hasn't had his first MMR yet as he keeps catching things .

BEBE - I think it is a phase they go through - finidng their boundaries etc. A bit me a it is unusual for them . It is soo tiring discipling all the time but hey you just need to think it will be worth it in the end .

M2L&A -poor you - you must be shattered. Not too long now and A will be settling into more of a routine and giving you an easier timexx

ISAIDNO - we just booked centerparcs for 7 nights in June. DH only has June and September with no university. I'll probably take the kids camping with my parents and try out the big tent my Daddy bought us . Am waiting until they are a wee bit older before we go abroad.

Hope everyone else is okay.

NAO - good to hear from you and DONUT. How you settling in to Bahrain now?

take care all
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bebe - I am sure Bethany could give P a run for her money, she regularly hits and bites me. If I am ignoring her she will come up and try and bite me, she gets a big stern NO and I turn her away from me or get up and walk away from her. If she gets told off she covers her face with her hands or throws herself to the floor and wails. She doesn't like getting told No that's for sure. She's a wee madam that's for sure. I use the naughty corner from about age 2.

Rumpel - sorry you are all ill again you have had a time of it. Am very of you going to centerparcs, we are hoping we may get the chance about October

Disney - read your FB post, poor Samuel but hey that boy is one astonishing fighter and I think we will beat everything that is thrown at him

Poledra - your poor childminder bet she was beside herself.

Still in shock here - a BOY!

Rumpel - so sorry you are poorly, seems to have been one thing after another for you! Sending hugs!

Disney - As I said on fb Samuel is a little superstar & I have everything crossed that he will come through the other side of this, he is such a fighter!

SK - Bet P & B would be a right pair together then! I hate it when I have to tell her off & she screams at me like I have mortally wounded her! I would dearly love to be one of the parents at toddler group that sits & chats to their friend while their child plays. I just can't trust P not to wallop another child, even bigger older boys are not safe! She smacked her 3 year old cousin coz he had something she wanted & he had pushed her away from it, would have escalated if DH hadn't stepped in, she was hulking up as we call it! They just have no cencept of sharing at this age at all! I want her to be feisty & stand up for herself coz she is only small, but this aggresive streak is not good! I know it's a phase but it can't end soon enough! Newborns are a piece of cake compared to toddlers, for a start you know they are going to stay where you put them!

Hi evryone, haven't been on here in ages, just thought I'd take a peek.
SK - wow a boy, he is going to be so doted on by his sisters, lovely.

Disney - Hope Samuel is doing well

Bebe - Megan is recognised as 'spirited' lol
she is the opposite to her brother and it's been a bit of a shock! But I am handling it by the word no constantly and have found that ignoring her, no talking, eye contact, etc works quite well. She knows when she has done something wrong as she puts her hands over her eyes and hangs her head in shame....quite funny really. I am having sibbing rivalry problems atm, they just won't bloody share! I can't buy 2 of everything I'll be broke in a week.

Rumple - sorry to hear you've all been ill again

Right got to go and make a cardboard house....oh joy.....

yayyy im back on dh fixed the new router up yesterday and oh my word its good to be back, my phone is good but very annoying trying to type on here or e-mails

well samuel is doing just great, he weighs 20 lb which is a bit small but hes been through a lot so im not worried, no walking yet but he took 1 step the other night, nearly 19mths now and with a curved spine thats amazing, he has lost most of his sight out of one of his eyes but the other is spot on. so its also a balance thing trying to walk, but we will get there and if we dont we dont , hes still here and that the main thing,

cardio update, 2 big vsd holes 1 small pda, they will do open heart surgery in approx 18mths or sooner if the heart begins to fail before, but its fixable,

i was reading bebe,s post on how P is everywhere, my gd is 14 mths and like a whirlwind shes never still ever, talks and moves and hits big time scratches too.

my dd her mum is frantic but as i told her there all different, at playgroup shes the one chasing jessica and cant let her mingle inbetween children as she will lash out if she wants something,

they have no concept of sharing, if a toy looks fun they want it, my dd uses the naughty mat already but i have told her imo shes too young for it yet, im sure you will agree.

samuel is scared of jess there coming up today and he wont move if shes here which is awfull, im going to have to say something but how to put it nicely

i can honestly say sam is the most laid back placid lad, he can spend up to an hour sitting at his desk reading or colouring his books, then he goes to his farm and same agian an hour ish lining his animals up one by one then putting them in the farm, he gets most upset if you mess his toys up and is very protective of them. there all so different children,

got to go wake mr sam up here, thanks for all the lovely well wishes ladies you guys are great.

Good to hear Sam doing well, despite all his problems; I'm sure it must be your marvellous mummy-ness which is helping him so much. Here's hoping the next round of ops goes as planned.

Right - off to Center Parcs now.

Rumpel- Sorry to hear youve all been ill again

Bebe- Abigail and I went to a friends house. Her little girl is 2 days older than Abigail and we met in the ward in hospital.
The girls both wanted the same toy and after a few pulls of the toy the screaming started. They stood opposite each other taking it in turns to scream at each other getting louder each time. Both us mummies had to turn away and laugh as it was so funny to watch!!

pudding- good to hear from you.

Disney- Glad Sam is doing well. Hes always been a fighter.

Isaidno- enjoy centre parcs

Being a lazy mummy today. Abigail is poorly, hasnt been right all week. Was sick on Monday, had diahroea on tuesday, was ok ish yesterday then up all last night with a temp and today its up to 39. I feel shitty too so just hoping im not getting it too. We have spent today sat cuddling on the sofa and dozing off whilst watching cbeebies.

Having abit of a shit week myself really. Saw the midwife yesterday after waiting an hour in the surgery with Abigail getting tired and hungry.
Eventually got seen and my sugar levels are high again dispite cutting out loadsa sugar from my diet and my BP is still high so im being sent off for a consultants appointment. Midwife reckons they may put me on medication to try and stablise it. Not overly keen on the heart rate slowing tablets though so will have to have a good chat about it.
Feels like im falling apart at the mo.
Plus its looking more and more likely that im not going to get the more natural, less intervention birth I wanted

But as DH says, Needs must if its best for baby.

On a better note, we are going to hopefully buy a new car tomorrow

isaidno have a great time it sounds lovely there, ive never been to a cp but ive only heard praise for the places, we will have to try it this year.

pigley relax about the birth this isnt going to help your bp, every birth is so so different all 7 of mine were as well, when i was pg with samuel i was on 4 injections of insulin a day as my sugar levels were ranging from 12 to over 20...
if you dont want intervention then dont have it, its your birth and baby you decide honey, have a good think or maybe write a list on what you want during the birth, positions freedom to roam etc.... they can be accomodating if they know, after all they want you to be as calm as can be, and thats best for you and baby....also 2nd time around you know what coming but look what you get at the end, and the pain dissapears like magic doesnt it...

my dh always laughs at me as at the end im crying and telling him thats it no bloody more ive had enough .....2 mins later awwww look at him oh hes lovely...no recollection of any pain, us women are strong people alright

happy car hunting pigley, were looking to today except dh has his new car and were looking for a 2nd car for me now, we didnt need one as he worked nights and i had the car in the day ....

as you know he lost his job in early december well hes had nothing since he woudnt sign on and its been terrible.... thank god we had savings to live on, me as ever practical just incase we get a bad time.

well hes got a new job starts monday as a car transporter, only badside is he will go monday and come home saturday, to me this is going to be a long long week, full childcare alone all the medical things i have to do too, we have 3 hospital appts a week as well, so we need a 2nd car for me, the goodside is the wages are triple per week he was on in december,

anywy of to get the boys breakfast, have a good weekend ladies and enjoy.....

Morning all. Just a quick catch-up before I start some work

Disney, glad Sam's doing so well. I've been thinking about him a lot over the last few weeks.

Pigley, hope you're feeling better. We're all stuffed with the cold. It's put back our get-Orlaith-out-of-our-bed plans quite a bit - she coughs all night so it's easier to just keep her in with us than keep getting up. It's too bloody cold to sit up resettling her at 3am - brrrr!

Hope everyone else is doing well - nice to see Rumpel and Thepuddingchef after a bit of an absence!

You might remember my posts whining about my DH over the last year (they did seem to be quite frequent...). Well, he's been moved sideways at work, which isn't the top result for his career but has made all the difference to our family life. He was soooo stressed with the (unreasonable) bloke he worked for, and that was spilling over into home. Now he's no longer having to deal with this man, things are so much better, and his workload is significantly more manageable. So we have had some lovely family weekends (all of us curled up on the sofa yesterday watching Ice Age 3 - lovely!) and he is so much more patient with the children and helping more in the house. Thank you for listening to me over the year (especially Rumpel, Disney and SK), I'm so glad it's worked out. it wasn't that I didn't love him, just that I didn't like living with him!

Just me, back again to have a soppy moment - this time 6 years ago, I was in hospital having DD1. My baby is 6! 6! How did that happen?

hi everyone just weighed and measured Bethany tonight as I do it every 6 months on DD1 and 2's birthdays, she is 79.5cms tall and 1st 8lbs, has 16 teeth and is just totally mad

poledra - your DD1 and my DD2 share a birthday she was 4 yesterday. Am so happy things seem back on an even keel with you and DH you must be so relieved.

disney - glad DH has a new job but what an undertaking for you at home with the DC all week, still needs must and you are afterall a supermum

pigley - already spoken to you on the "other" thread

isaidno - hope you had a nice time at CP

Still not over this DS shock, cannot decide on a name and still to scared to buy anything blue, DP and I had a look yesterday at this strange side of the shops and had a coo at all the little blue things. Went looking at a car today, I really liked it now DP isn't so sure as basically we only do about 4000 miles a year and he thinks we should get an older one and keep the extra money. Got to start the ball rolling about the extension as well.

Poledra- Fantastic news that things are better at home. It must have made soo much difference

Got our new car on Tuesday. Its lovely but feels so large and big!

Abigail is developed a liking for Ballet thanks to Peppa Pig. She spins around with her arms in the air and does "pointy toes"! She seems to pick thing up istantly and can now to 10 and recognise most of the numbers too. She knows quite a few shapes including ones like Hexagon and is now showing an interest in colours. She seems to be this little learning machine! I dont push it upon her at all... In fact after her numbers book about 20 times im actively discouraging it!!

Really coming along with her speech too putting 2 or 3 words together. Told DH "well Done Daddy" for putting up a blind at the weekend!

We are kinda thinking about going somewhere Sept time in the UK. What kinda place is best for a 2.2yr old and 4mth old... Butlins or Centre Parcs?
Would centre Parcs be better for slightly older chidren with the activities?

Hope everyone is well.

Pigley - adorable vid of A on fb! What a little clever clogs! No adivce on holiday, I haven't been to CP and not been to Butlins since I was about 9!

Poledra - glad things are better at home, bet it is lovely having family time again!

SK - B is such a little dot, bet she is just so adorable!

Phoebe can do 1,2,3 and then we get 6,8,10 she counts along with the lift on 'show me show me'. She is fab with colours though, mainly thanks to this brilliant book! She is also doing the joining words together thing. We get alot of 'I see cat' & 'more please'. Also started properly singing twinkle twinkle little star which is cute beyond words! [proud mummy emoticon] This is definately the best age yet, hard work, but SO much fun!

pigley - both butlins and center parcs are very child friendly with soft play areas, swimming etc.

We went to Sherwood CP (was fab - going again in October with in-laws) and having also been to Minehead Butlins I would say I preferred CP, but also lots more expensive. One drawback is that CP is quite spread out which means lots of walking or cycling. (Cycling not too great an idea with 4 mth old.) Butlins more compact and flat. With CP you are also a bit more confined to the site, whereas Butlins are near the beach / town as well. CP more expensive to eat out, but also nicer range of restaurants. CP can be extra expensive if you want to add on activities; although your dc will be too young to pester you too much for all the extras!

Don't know how much of a "snob" you are but there are less tattooed people at CP!!!

Feeling really crap & need desperately to offload! Had MRI 3 weeks or so ago & got results yesterday. They showed that my MS is more active than they had thought & basically I have to go onto drug treatment asap. Trouble is it throws up so many questions/problems re having more children. DH & I are in complete disagreement & arguing constantly. I feel so crap about it I feel I can't give him the family he wants. And he thinks I am being selfish & not thinking about how things would be for him if I have another baby and get ill again! Hate this, it's just more stress that we don't need! Sorry to winge just feel so rubbish about it's like ecerything I wanted is slipping away.

Bebe big hugs to you. Thats news and I hope that you feel better soon. can't really add much more, but I'm sure you and your DH will sort it out, it must be alot of information to take in at the minute.

I'm not sure if it's an option, but could you not think about TTC when P is abit older and abit more independant? (school age?) I can say that 2 close together is hard work, and that's without MS!

Trouble is they have told me that I can't have some drugs (ie most effective ones) and stop to becoming PG. If I am on them then I am on them for life They don't know what effect they would have on an unborn child as they are so new. Plus they have also advised that if I want more children I should have them asap & certainly within 5 years of diagnosis, which leaves me 4 years! If I have another soon, Phoebe would be at preschool 3 mornings a week by the time potential LO arrives. Just so much to think about, and it sucks!

bebe firstly big hugs to you xxxx

ms totally sucks i know, right now im in a mobility scooter and the day is coming where it will be fulltime, its hard with samuel and the others as well. i had a relapse not long ago and have now lost the use of my left arm and part leg, the left side of my face and lips you could stick a pin in and i woudnt feel it.
i understand where your coming from in wanting another child, and also your dh,s

its in built in you those maternal feelings isnt it, but hes probaably just scared too, he doesnt like to see his wife suffer even giving him another child with the pregnancy and ms, youve got pressure all round, have another baby, get ill dont get ill, take the drugs or not ..........no wonder your all over the place.........take a breath and really calmly think..can YOU manage another pregnancy and child with the posibility of becoming sick again...if so then tell him its ok that you feel this is what you really need...
its horrible i get so down about my ms too, and often cry then im pissed of as nothing works or helps, my speech is slurred im in a scooter i cant shop, when i have my AF my dh has to help me and my god to me im humiliated... i dont want it any more than you do my friend, but we have and we have to deal with it, life has dealt us a crap hand eh!!!!

take it easy bebe and relax and have lots of cuddles with your family and dh....and your clever witty little girl

((hug)) for you bebe It must be very difficult to make such big decisions.

I suppose you could consider yourself to be very lucky to have the beautiful, clever Phoebe, and take the drugs to be the healthiest, fittest Mummy you can be, even if that means she is an only child. (And being an only child is hardly the worst thing in the world - better than having a sick Mummy.)

But the desire to have children is strong, and if you really want a brother or sister for her, then follow your instinct, delay the drugs and get babymaking pronto!! You can be on the medication in a year if you get pg quick that's not much delay. Of course you have to be confident you will be able to cope with another child, but ime looking after 2 or 3 isn't that much harder than looking after 1.

That's my two penn'orth