December 2008 Coven - white light and basket cases

[EffiePerine]

Seeing as LadyT broke the thread...

Oh and PMK tut tut to Mr PMK, and I have to say cheeky of the inlaws to suggest it too in such a way that it makes it difficult to say no, but hooray for cheerfulness all round, that is good.

Well done Mr Tilly! An excellent effort!

Well DS has had a bottle tonight. I have to confess it was formula, but I just wanted to see if it would fill him up and make him go longer. BUt veggie has just pointed out it probably wont Plus he is still wide awake, not as soothing as my milk so I will only have to feed him again soon anyway! Still he took a bottle so I will express again tomorrow, and keep up with it so that he gets used to it again and I may get a bit of freedom.

DS at hospital in the morning for a hip scan as he was a breech baby. It seems to have taken forever for his referral to come through. Although I am sure his hips are fine the way he kicks about

PMK that sounds like the kind of thing my DH does - infurriating isn't it when your not prepared?

Blimey, just saw Veggie's post at the top of the page and thought WG was pregnant for a second ! WG I'm so pleased for your friend and hope everything goes OK.

Well done to Mr Tilly and I bet you're relieved it's all over, Tilly.

DaisyDora Good luck for your DS's hip scan tomorrow. My DS had one too and all was well. I hope you don't have to wait as long as we did (over 2 hours).

After DH working till 10pm most of last week, working Saturday and out sailing this morning, I'm afraid I'm back on the chocolate . I'd better stay away from the weight loss thread!

daisy well done on getting ds to take the bottle! What was the secret? What bottle and teat did you use?

P was up for 5 feeds last night between 7 and 7. I'm hoping for a better night tonight! She's sleeping now...

P had her first go in a swing today . We got Lucy's old baby swing out and P loved it. Have put a pic on my profile.

Veggie I'm v impressed with you pulling both boys! You definitely deserved your scone

nolda would you like to join me in a bag of Milky Buttons?

Evening all, well I'm feeling v exhausted and sorry for myself for no good reason - well, expect we spent this afternoon with some friends we haven't seen for ages at a friend's house we know quite well, everyone's got kids and we thought we'd try T going to sleep in his pushchair there instead of his cot at home for the first time but he wasn't having any of it and he's now in his cot but not asleep and 2 hours later than normal I know it's not the end of the world and no drama but I just knew it would be me who'd take him home and sort everything out on the domestic front while he gets to stay out late drinking with the friends I haven't seen in ages. I guess I've really felt it this weekend that the total default setting for looking after T is me, and even at weekends I have to ask DP to do everything.
Sorry, rant over, must go and do everything that needs to be done. Will catch up properly later.

Mmmm...milky buttons, i've got ds1's chocolate stars not as good but at least it's chocolate, but gotta have my dinner.

Oh and hooray for baby daisy and the amazing bottle taking I'm impressed! That reminds me I must try another bottle I haven't since ds2 was 8 weeks.

JJ for the poll, DD has slept in her own room since 6 weeks, and has slept through the night since exactly 3 months. Before that she used to wake twice in the night max. Likes her sleep,like her Mum! DS went into his own room at 2 weeks (we had a maternity nurse) and also slept through from 3 months. Although we did have a few sleep problems with him from about 6-8 months. He wouldn't settle without us in the room etc. Baby Whisperer was a Godsend.

Spot, I know how you feel, big rows this weekend about how I never get a break. Think I made my point eventually.

Well done Mr Tilly, nothing on earth would induce me to run a marathon, but then I really, really hate running.

Fairly peaceful weekend in compairson to the last couple, but am still shattered. Sausage, eggs and chips for supper, naughty but yummy.

Evening all, firstly massive well done to Mr Tilly for the marathon!

trace v cute pics, P has such an adorable smile

WG what a tangled web, but as you say it's all worked out in the end.

spot grrrr, that sounds pretty unfair. A lot of parenting seems to be mothering if we're honest, but the solace comes from knowing that (shhh!) our babies love us best at the moment

quick summary of the poll so far, of 14 responses 8 babies are in their own rooms, 5 in with their parents and veggie I'm not sure if you have the amby in your room? And there's no obvious pattern of good v bad sleepers, it seems that the best is babyKimberley so big stars to kimberley and can the rest of us please swap? Maybe it's just the 4 months regression thing that makes the difference, rather than where the baby is... Our night was pretty iffy, she woke as usual at 11.30 but cunningly I'd gone to bed at 9 kept awake til 2 by people across the street having a party then woke at 5 for the day [yawn] but we all went back to bed at 7 until 9.30. I'm going to try ignoring her unless she's actively cross, as suggested by lal above, and do my best to try and ignore her chattering. She has inherited her parents' singers lungs, alas, and can squeak happily pretty noisily when she likes!

time for tea and early night again, catch up with you all properly tomorrow ater our first swimming lesson [excited jj]

Amby is in our room. He wakes once after midnight on a good night 3 times on a bad night and no pattern as to why. Most of the time he's ok.

Trace I've been eating chocolate buttons too. They're the ones I keep for bribing DD .

Off to bed now. Sleep well everyone.

Sorry for the victim post, tiredness overcame me, then I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself, phoned DP and told him I was putting the sofa out for him to sleep on, have put off what can be until tomorrow and decided to be a bit more relaxed about things. Have also accepted that I probably do manage things a bit too closely which is why I end up doing everything, I would in his position! Will maybe ghave to let the ball drop a few times just so it's clear that I don't have everything sorted out and he does have to take responsibility for baby stuff too. He's such a good dad I can't complain but need to let go a bit more on the control freakery!
Well done Mr Tilly for the marathon, I have so much admiration for those who do it, not so much for the day itself but for the weeks and weeks of discipline and commitment that led up to it. He's a better man than I!
Food and sofa sorting out time, good nights all. xxx

JJ A late entry to the poll. DD sleeps in a cot in her own room and has done for about 3 weeks now. Although she woke regularly when she was little she?s pretty much a one wake a night girl. She did take a backwards step when she went into her cot (although she?s pretty much back on track now) - she settled fine, but woke more often in the night, I wonder if at first she couldn?t settle herself when she woke cause her surroundings were different? BTW we eased her into it, taking the moses into her room for a week, then putting the moses into the cot for a week, then putting her into the cot finally and it was only the last step the unsettled her - I think we were maybe a little too careful

Jolly I second the spanx recommendation and the tip of getting the ones that go as high as possible. However I find the top rolls down a bit, which is annoying. I?ve seen Gok Wan does some with shoulder straps to keep them up, which I?m tempted by

NJAN we use the nasosal too, its grand

Sybil congratulations, on the school and anniversary

Trace I love Lu?s dream theory and actually think she could be onto something ? it could be entertaining if we shared dreams! Oh, talking of dreams ? the other night I dreamt that I met a man at a party who loved to clean, so I ran off with him ? any prizes for guessing what is missing in my life at the moment! P looks thrilled to be in the swing, they?re fab pics (and I still love the one of P?s first smile, it makes me smile too)

Kayz I love the bat top. I once went past a gothic B&B in Whitby which really intrigued me, I?d love to have a look around but think I?d be a little bit scared to actually stay there!

Really well done to MrTilly, even watching it on the telly made me tired!

Spot I know how you feel tonight, DH has said a couple of times that as I?m not at work at the moment this is my work. Which is fine, but my response of a 37.5 hour week and 24 days annual leave went straight over his head. Grr to your DH. Good point about the control freakery as well, as I?m definitely guilty of that

We all had fun (more than expected ? at being so negative) at our niece?s 2nd birthday party up in Scotland this weekend. DD was a bit unsettled on Friday night, but generally very good and I glowed when DSIL complimented DD her great settling at bedtime

Spot I think we all go through this eventually and it can actually be quite a lonely place to be. It is hard when you have known each other so well and could do lots of stuff together and talk about loads of stuff including whinging debriefing about work. But when babies come along and so much changes for us ladies not just our bodies but we are suddenly so responsible for a little person 24hrs a day, and we're not quite sure if we are even doing it right. We don't have a boss to tell us we are doing well, no performance review, and even worse no one will make us a cup of coffee at morning tea break. All of this is so hard to express to our DH/DP's and makes us feel even more alone. Well it did for me anyway after DS1 was born. I know a few of us bang on about it but the What mothers do book is really very helpful and I think was a big turning point for me and has really helped me express to DH what I am feeling. Which in turn has made him feel better too.

Spot I know how you feel - exact same situation here... trouble is, I feel like I need to micro manage or things would go tits up - dh gets so complacent when he's home as he's had to concentrate and is exhausted from work, so he's just a disaster and needs to be constantly prompted... many an argument.
Lal yes I could try and meet up this week - Tues or Wed would be good
Can't remember who but someone asked about formula last feed to sleep longer? Does seem work for me - yes - don't know why, but dh thinks because formula longer to digest therefore not hungry again as fast? fwiw[shrug]

morning all!

jump another late poll entry, ds2 sleeps in his own room since about 4 months. When we first moved him he slept better but has since reverted to waking lots from about 3am. When he's sleeping better he'll share a room with ds1.

spot grr at dh but I know exactly where you're coming from. It is hard to do but you do need to relinquish some of the control. When I started to do that dh would forget things or do something wrong but he soon learnt! And I learnt he just has his own way of doing things, different to me but not wrong ifyswim. The most important thing though is to keep talking to dh & let him know how you feel. As Veggie says we keep banging on about it but the What Mothers Do book is excellent.

Dh says thanks for all the congratulations. He's feeling very proud & has said he's definitely never doing another one

I've got a funny photo I'll have to try & upload. We went out for tea on Saturday, I had a glass of cheerfulness & ds2 kept trying to grab my glass & drink it . Dh reckons he definitely takes after my side of the family

Plus I'm feeling a bit odd about something. My mum & dad offered to look after ds2 overnight on Sat, he did his usual of being really unsettled from 3am so my mum took him into bed with them. On the one hand I can't blame her as its what we do & I can't really say anything to her as it meant I got a full night's sleep & a lie in but it has left me feeling a bit odd about it.

Right, ds1 needs some toast, back soon.

Morning,

Jump DS2 is in our room and sleeps from between 10 and 11 until about half 6.

Zoe This is their website. It has pictures of the rooms on it so you can have a nosey!!

Hope everyone is well, hopefully doing more gardening today but we have rain forecast.

Well, DS managed to go 3 hours last night so much better. I doubt it had anything to do with the formula. I think he just enjoys keeping me on my toes Trace we use T/Tipee Close to Nature bottles. I think they still have the size 1 teats on. The strange thing was he never even protested - he just took it. I even bought a sippy cup and had that to hand in case the bottle was rejected. We'll see how todays botle attempt goes.....

Right off to get ready for the hospital. nolda I hope we don't have to wait that long but you never knnow. I'm hoping as the appointment is 9.30, the consultant won't have got too far behind with the appointments!!

spot I know how you feel. But even if my DH did try to do more I would find myself hovering and checking on him, making sure he was doing things the way i do things.

Daisy, yay for the 3hrs! I think they do like to keep us on our toes!!

Has anyone read the No Cry Sleep Solution? Just wondering if its a good book to read & try. I know its still early for ds2 to be sleeping through but this waking from 3am isn't due to hunger, he always pushes the bottle away so I'm just wondering if its become a habit.

I liked it Tilly but our problem with ds1 was being settled on the boob so if he woke he wanted to be settled back to sleep on the boob. I think it was no cry sleep solution that suggests trying to catch them just as they at waking and either pat or rock them back to sleep and eventually they will not wake anymore. I think this option was aimed more at day time sleeps though. It might be a bit much to ask to stand over the cot until he starts stirring at 3am.

veggie, lol. There is a bed in his room so I could sleep there, I might see if the library has got it & have a read.

Hooray it's raining I can wear my cool ZJ mac!

morning all,

I'm a bit weary today. P woke every 1.5 hours. Went down to sleep just before 7, woke at 9, 10.30, 12, 1.30, 3, 4.30, 5.30 and 7. Each time she was really upset and would only settle with boob. She was similar the night before but not quite so many wakings. Not sure what's wrong with her, if anything. I'm finding it hard to keep her at 3 hours in the day too - more like 2 hours again. Perhaps another growth spurt

spot - I know how you feel with the control freak thing. With dd1 I had to learn to let others have different ways of doing things and like Tilly said, they can be different without being wrong. DH would get up with Lu on a weekend and they'd sit and watch telly for a couple of hours and snuggle up and eat bits of breakfast when they fancied it, whereas as I would get us to sit at the table and eat breakfast, then clear up, then get dressed then chose an 'activity' .... it took me a while to accept that dh was not going to ruin her but that he can have his own way of parenting and his own relationship with her. I think it's good that she sees different ways of doing things as long as we back each other up and are consistent on the big stuff. She is not allowed tv before school and dh would never go against that. I know the issues are different at this age but it's the same principle and I need to listen to myself as I am already thinking the same with dd2! It struck me the other day how much stuff we carry in our heads all the time - dd1 was in the bath and dh said "does she need her hair washed today?", which made me think I keep a constant log in my head...DD1's hair was last washed on Wednesday, she had a mini bath on Thursday, dd2 had a feed 2 hours ago and will need a sleep very soon, the buggy is in the car boot, the garage door is not locked yet, the washing basket is almost full, there are no clean cot sheets - must do a lights wash today, dh is nearly out of shampoo - add to shopping list, dd1 has ballet so needs a hot lunch...and so on. I think his head says "ah. good. clean clothes ready for work. happy family!" but guess who gets big beams from P and cuddles from L the moment he walks in?!!!

now - I'm taking part in a massive research study on breast cancer. It's hoping to be the largest ever study to try to find out more about the risk factors and hopefully lead to better treatments etc. It involves filling in a fairly big questionnaire and having a blood sample taken by your local GP, then sending it off to the research company. They are doing it all by recommendation and want as wide a population as possible, so my friend asked me and submitted my details then the company wrote to me and asked if I did want to take part. Anyway, I'm sending my stuff off this week and wondered if anyone would be interested in joining it - if so you'd need to email me your (real!) name and address so I could fill the form in then the company would contact you directly. The first letter is just details and you have to reply to sign up so at this stage you are not committing to anything. ANyway - email me if you're interested. [email protected]

I do waffle don't I?
P is waking up then we're off to lovely under 1s

see you later xxx

Oh I mean JB mac, although I'm sure you have a cool mac too ZJ.