August 2008 - The One where Sazzles was missing so this is what we got!

[oopsacoconut]

I can't do the list sazzles will have to do it when she is back!

Dizzy and Albs - I too can do a good rant, usually at 3am though when I just can't take any more. I might not go out, as I think the fact that I don't get time with DP has been very stressful. Half the prob is that at weekends he doesn't spend time with me and Sebastian.

Oh dear - London meetup, to sling or to pushchair?

Just dropped DD off for her first proper nursery school session, only cried a little bit . Seems like she was just born. Poor poppet is quite shy, I know this will do her the world of good, but still, my baby

On a lighter note, I'm planning to just bring DS in his moby to the meetup, and he's a right porker. For me it's not worth the effort of getting the pushchair on the train if it's busy. Plus he keeps me nice and warm when he's all tucked up in my bosom

ataraxis The lady's hair was purple not purple rinse - and I think had some blue in too. She was probably late 50s I should think. Lots of interesting costume jewellery as well.

no1 at hv's comments. What a crock. I would just stop going if I were you!

sazzles Yes to CWP sometime - I can only really do holidays atm though because of getting back to pick up ds1

vg My ishoos are:
Not having any time for myself. Ever.
Not having time to exercise (see above)
Not being financially independent (see comments from others)
Not being able to divide myself adequately between my children.
Not having enough time with dh.
Worrying about dh and his health as he works too hard.
Not being very good at this mothering lark (I feel very inadequate next to those sorts of mums who spend all day doing activities/arts and crafts etc with their children, never seem to get bored or rant at them either)
I worry about raising confident children as I'm not - although much better than in my twenties
I also worry whether I can pick up my career when the children are all at school and whether I should even try because they will still need me

There is a lot of worrying in there isn't there

And, I also think about how to keep myself 'interesting'. Dh married me because I had 'an opinion on everything' and wasn't afraid to argue with him.

Actually don't think I've answered your question really - I think you need to also talk to women who aren't mothers as mine all centre around that. My step sister is the same age as me and has just sailed across the Atlantic. She is a high flying career woman and whilst I am very fond of her, her life could not be more different from mine.

Right I'm off for the day, have a good one everyone

got home from swimming and looked in puzzlement at the house, thought earthquake had hit whilst I was out..but no, twas just an almighty mess.

rotter awww you must have felt really sad,even though you know it's a good thing. Bless her she is still your baby. It doesn't matter how old they are

sambo I have just had the exact same though. Just walked in and do not know where to start. DD just walks in and tips up. Left in a hurry and forgot about the mess.

Took ds for his last set of jobs. Oh lordy did he sob, and sob, then held is breath, then sobbed a bit more. Bless him. I was sat in waiting room after(as advised) and he was doing the whole sob with the in breath thing. Honestly you could have tripped over his lip. (very dramatic)

miamla I had no idea you made slings.
I just bought a ringsling(freedom) It came yesterday. I have used it today, think it will take some getting used to as dont feel as trusting as I do my Moby D.

I missed a turn today (and there aren't a lot to miss in this neck of the woods) while thinking about what women might want to think about and Petitfilou - the first seven things on your list are on mine too. (Apologies again for phrasing everything wrong in my post on the MMR thing- I was trying to say your post on it had been perfect ).

Ann- glad you had a talk with your DH. If he does help out, it might be a good idea to keep quiet about what he is doing 'wrong' and praise him to the nines. A lot of dads are more freaked out than they let on about being responsible for the small one. If you're out having your 'hot' coffee on ALB's suggestion you can let him and Seb work things out for themselves. Do they make coffee 'hot'? Does anyone have a link for that?

lol at 'hot' coffee

Ah poor DS, no1 - is he ok now?
And Rotter-that is a tough moment. Let us know how she get's on.

I dreamt that I met Cyteen last night and we trailed around the centre of Liverpool looking for somewhere to sit and chat about how babies change your life. Then I woke up ... I do think this bit is hard, especially with a first baby because you have to adapt to the idea that the centre of gravity in your life is over there (in Joe) rather than in your own identity. I said this to my very practical sister as my sole piece of advice when she was wondering how on earth she was going to fill her time during her maternity leave . In aug 07 she told me I was talking nonsense. Last week she fed the same line back to me as her own personal discovery

The laughs and chances to pause for breath will increase as Joe gets older, the lows will be lower and the highs higher. My oldest two were killing each other for most of yesterday afternoon, then suddenly they were playing at being 'The Incredibles' (a film they saw and couldn't make head nor tail of over Christmas). DD1 was chasing DS around the house shouting 'Come back, Captain Adorable'. Those moments are priceless and catch you when you're most fed up.

['So Sibh, what exactly appealed to you about a career in lecturing?' I'll shut up for a bit

no1 aww poor Marcus. Joe had his final set of jabs yesterday and let everyone know that he was VERY ANGRY INDEED about it He did his best angry crying and accusing face, doubly so after the HV smiled at him.

Speaking of which, bloody HV drop in clinic is no longer running on Wednesday mornings No notice of this, of course, so I bundled DS into his pram and rushed out of the house without breakfast this morning, so eager was I to get him weighed and start nappy shopping, only to be told that they're only doing drop-ins on Thursday lunch times from now on. Had to cheer myself up by going into town and rinsing the local branch of Zavvi for going-out-of-business bargains.

Intrigued to hear that I've been in your dreams Sibh More intrigued by the fact that you get long enough sleeps to have dreams...DS ended up in with us at 3am because I was too wiped out to do the settling thing properly . Have been a bit worried about my physical and mental health, tbh, but seem a bit better today. I had a nap with DS this morning, think that helped.

Very glad to hear of a happy meet-up, travel disasters aside. Re. the London meet, I can tell you that I went down to visit my dad a couple of weeks ago and didn't bother with the pram at all, just stuck DS in the Moby. It made going from Kings Cross over to Blackheath so much easier...you will not want to be pramming around Kings Cross underground, believe me. And Joe was fine in the sling when we were out and about, he seemed to enjoy having a good goggle at everything - and he's a chunkster baby so a lot to carry around, but it really worked.

My apologies. I have absolute no time to read up on things. I just wanted you all to know that I MISS YOU DEARLY!! I am working my ass off helping with my class reunion and somehow yesterday got roped into helping with the auction at dd1's school. My fingers are numb from all the laptop working I'm doing.

Sazzles I got your text but it was after I crashed last night from absolute exhaustion.

Will hopefully be back here soon..........

How was your crazy-ass 5am boot camp then TS?

aww its awful for them cyteen I so sorry you are feeling low. Its amazing what a bit of sleep can do.
I also brought Marcus in with us last night after taking 2 hours to get dd back to sleep, and him waking for feeding constantly.
I have relaxed a little on sleep routine tbh as i was/am so tired i was getting so upset about it.
I have realised/decided they are only little for such a short time then if they need hug comfort our bed so be it.
or until im less tired to deal with it. iykwim.

did you mention you were going for councilling/therapy sessions??
Have you started them yet?
your emotions must be like a rollercoaster cyteen you should be kind to yourself.
sorry i am not the best with words
better in rl

hi ts

No1 Your HV lady needs to BACK OFF! Reese weighed right at 15 pounds at 20 weeks. Marcus is FINE! OH and I say Number One when I read your name.

VG, What's troubling this modern intelligent woman is LAUNDRY! Why is there always so much of it and how is it there's never the right place for it, clean or dirty!!

Dizzy you don't want me organzing your life this week. You might find your undies in the ice box and your boots on your cat....if you have a cat that is.

Ann glad you talked. Now breath.

Cyteen, boot camp went very well. I still have range of motion issues due to my CS (notice I didn't call it my inseam). I'm in no pain today (except the twinges around the scar) but I didn't push myself either. I'm the person who likes to PACE herself. I watched one lady through all she could into the warm up jog (it was like she was RACING). Will be interested to see if she returns tomorrow morning.

Life's a bit crazy for me at the moment. I'm giving all my spare time to my highschool reunion committee. TWENTY YEARS!!! This will be our 20th reunion and it's my goal to make sure EVERYBODY comes. In the past it's been put together by the "SNOBS" of the class. This year the committee is made up of an incredible mix and people seem to be interested in coming. Out of 114 classmates we've already got 35 or so noted as coming and that's just on FACEBOOK. Facebook as been a DREAM for us. We have 62 classmates out there. Totally cool. On the not cool side is I got roped into helping with dd1's school auction. I'm going to DRAG MY FEET on that thing. I offered up the best venue idea in the world to the chair and she's not responded. Her voice reminds me of NAILS ON A CHALKBOARD. ARRGGGHHH! She's also the type of person who takes on airs. Bothers me. Bothers me. Bothers me.

So much for me saying I didn't have time to catch up. HUH! LOL

Hi again everyone
Cyteen sorry you're feeling low. I am as well, so can sympathise.

Little man had his second lot of jabs today. Poor boy didn't half scream. He's asleep in the pram at the moment.

Ann (((hugs))) for you and your little man I hate jab day. But special hugs for you since you're having such a hard time at the moment. Day to day it is a slog but you are still the same strong and capable woman you always were...just with an added dimension of mum, which just makes you stronger tbh

no1 my counselling sessions haven't started yet, there's a waiting list so it'll be a while. That's definitely contributing to my weird moods - waiting to begin talking about a lot of horrible shit and making myself vulnerable, which I don't take well to. I know it will be worth it but still.

Funny you should say that about the babies being little for such a short time - I thought the exact same thing today

Albs, the wrap has got to be good and tight before you put the baby in. I'm quite tempted to just bring the Moby to London if other people are, and a blanket to put baby on if he goes to sleep.

TS I organised a school reunion 2yrs ago, about 6m before everyone got on FB. Was sick as a parrot when I discovered it LOL.

Waiting for DH to come home from his parents as FIL was v depressed and mentioned suicide to me this avo when I visited. I took MIL home for dinner to give them a break from each other (they have both been housebound with illness/injury) and DH has taken her back so he can assess the situation. I made FIL a GP appt for Monday and DH will go with him, hoping things will be ok in the meantime...

buckets how awful, poor DH, I hope his dad manages to get the help and support he needs.

TS I have no cat and can forego the knickers if it helps - see?!? I feel better organised already

well done you on organising the reunion - you couldn't drag me kicking and screaming to meet up with my school lot am always in awe of those that do - there are some on my FB and more adding me and I keep ignoring them

No1 hope Marcus feeling a bit better, wee pudding

rotter hope that the first day went ok I bet it tugged on your heart strings more than the wee ones

quiet in here without Sazz isn't it

Buckets How awful for you - has he always had mh issues? I used to work for a mh helpline called Saneline (for two years, a long time ago) I think they are still going if that is any use.

Does his GP know he is potentially suicidal? Personally I would be tempted to ask if his GP can call you so you can tell them what is going on. Four days is a long time when you are depressed (or worrying about someone who is depressed)

cyteen sorry to hear you have been feeling so low. (which reminds me I never did find those articles for you and vg ) I'm just calming myself down after an awful evening. ds1 goes to gym(nastics)on a Weds, we get home late and today dh has gone out for the evening and it all went tits up .....anyway I digress.

Have you read 'Life after Birth' by Kate Figes. I found it helpful after ds1 was born. Currently reading 'Wife in the North' after Chacha said I sounded like her. I think I actually am her except Oxfordshire slightly less remote than Northumberland

Hi All

{{{HUGS}}} fo all those who need them

Am sort of hiding from life a bit - my hand is extremely painful and has caused me to cry on more than one occasion today. Paracetamol take the edge off but not for long. Everything hurts even sitting still . Am going to try snooze on the sofa but will return and try and concentrate to catch up. DD finds finger fun and tries to grab and chew it regularly - I have to try and distract her but occasionally she catches me unawares and I yell, she cries, I cry she laughs and its all over!