The March-ers 2019 - Baby Talk #2

[Angelmiracle]

Thread 2 for all our newborns ❤🤗👣

On another note can someone please tell me how I can get my son to nap in his cot. In the early days he was in a moses basket which changed to Co-sleeping when I was too lazy /tired to wait for him to drop back to sleep after feeding and now we start bedtime Co sleeping so I have a lovely (secondhand) mama's and papa's cot which he has slept in maybe 10 times. As he sleeps so well next to me, I didn't wanna disturb bed time but I tried him with a couple of naps in there..(after ensuring he was asleep on my arms) Woke up after 30 minutes, sometimes crying. Now I'm sitting in my arm chair after nursing him to sleep again with a numb arm. Please give me advice, he's very reliant on being helped to sleep.

Hi ladies, I've been unsuccessfully trying to keep up with posts as this last week has been a lot to handle. My brother died last Tuesday. We were all with him. I still can't believe it tbh but it'll just take time to wrap our heads around.

@Sianlouise432 I have the exact same problem. We have a lovely cot set up and never have him in it as we have always coslept due to breastfeeding. For the past 2 weeks my husband has been sleeping in the spare room due to him having a bad cough that kept waking Elliot and I took that opportunity to try to get him used to not sleeping directly beside me- I slept at the other side of the bed and moved close when I just needed to feed him. This seemed to be a good idea as there were some nights he didnt need fed until 6am. However, last night with my husband back in the bed Elliot was right beside me and needed to be latched on for most of the night! I might try to move him to the cot after falling asleep but he always seems to wake up and the plan falls apart!

@Brobot I'm so sorry for your loss and hope that having your family circle close will bring you comfort. It's lovely you were all with him

@Brobot so sorry for your loss. It's never easy even when it's expected. Hope you're doing okay as can be.

On the cotbed front, I purchased the mamas and papas cotbed mattress that others have mentioned. We are really pleased with it. Little man is in his own room now but we had a horrific night Saturday where he was waking practically every hour and just would not settle. We think a combination of teething, development leap (he is 5 months on Wednesday) and trying to get used to his new surroundings. I have put the sleepyhead in his cotbed for now until he settles in. We did the same thing when trying to get him used to the Snuzpod. When I had to wash the cover of the sleepyhead we put him in it and had a breakthrough. Hoping it's the same this time around!

I'm feeling a bit anxious about starting weaning. I'm just wondering at what pace and what types of foods to introduce and at what times. I'm probably really overthinking it and I'm sure it will all come naturally. I think it's just a change of routine again isn't it. Would really like to know what others are doing/intend on doing.

@Brobot I’m so sorry to hear your news lots of love to you and your family x

@ballanj it is really daunting the first time around. The Annabelle Karmel weaning book I had last time for DS had a meal planner which was super at helping me know what and when to feed solids. I will loosely follow this time using foods we all eat and add more finger food with each meal too so a mix of puree/mashed and blw. I will attach the First Tastes planner to see if it's useful for you.

@Brobot I'm very sorry about your brother. Sending my love to you and your family.

Hi folks,

Been quiet on here recently due to a couple of things.

Had a mental 8 weeks really. Friends wedding in Mexico, massive family holiday to Florida (got back this morning and am really suffering worn jet lag already), and about 3 weeks ago me and my babies father split up.

It was my decision, he's a good dad in terms of spending time with little man but we've had issues since I was pregnant of me doing all the mental labour and I just couldn't cope anymore. There would be nights when he was working and staying away and I realised I was so much happier alone. I was doing the same amount of work but without the crushing disappointment of there being someone else there who wasn't helping.

He's a mature student as well so I was doing the mental load and keeping us going on maternity pay, even though I'm only on statutory. He thinks he's helping me out by doing night feeds occasionally, to me that's not helping, that's parenting. Helping would be telling me to sit down on the couch and cuddle the baby whilst watching tv whilst he does all the washing or cleaning instead of him just getting the fun stuff all the time and me literally becoming ill over the last few weeks because of the stress of my brain never turning off.

Joy of joys he's still living with me at the minute. He doesn't want to move back to his mums at 33 which I appreciate. I also don't want to be the one who's kicked him out of his sons home. But I'm also aware that nothing will change if we still live together and I'm a firm believer in that dad's can still partner even when they're not living with their child. It's not up to me to make it easy for my ex, at some point he needs to step up. I'm not saying i should make it hard, but at some point he needs to make a plan about what he wants and how we're gonna achieve it - I can't keep giving him everything on a plate.

We can be friendly with each other - for example he came to Florida with my family and it was fine and I'd hope that we could carry on doing stuff like that (channeling my inner Kourtney K) but I think it's giving him false hope sometimes so maybe I need to be tougher with him

@Brobot I'm really sorry for your loss. I'm glad you were able to be with him and he had a chance to meet his nephew, I hope that gives you some comfort in this horrible time.

@WhatALearningCurve I'm sorry you've been going through trouble with your now ex. It's very brave to make that decision to split as staying together is often the easy option. I hope he can step up as a parent to help you out and for his own sake once he moves out.

@Brobot so sorry to hear about your brother. Hope you and your family are coping as well as can be expected 

@WhatALearningCurve sorry to hear you and babies dad have split. Sounds a little like my relationships! Mine doesn't do much at all neither. Maybe play/hold/feed the baby for an hour a night. His excuse, he's knackered, he works 10-12 hour days and it's bloody hard work! When's his time to rest! I sit at home every day looking after a baby not doing physical mental hard work! He's never done a night feed, never got up at a weekend with baby and doesn't do any house work. All he does is go to work and cut the grass!
He's also been working away these past couple of weeks and I've managed just fine on my own. Sometimes dread him coming home, feel like I have another child to look after when he's here!
Sorry to go on. Hope you had a lovely time in Florida

@brobot so sorry for the loss of your brother. Sending thoughts and prayers to you and your family x

@Whatalearningcurve sorry that you're going through a tough time at the moment x

Thanks everyone. It's still not sunk in. I decided to go and stay with my mum last night since hubby was away for work and thought there's no point in both of us being alone. Plus I think it's good for her to have Elliot around. I'm going to stay tonight again (even though hubby is back lol) because we enjoyed it and I don't want her to be alone. Elliot seems to sleep well here too lol. I think it's because the house is so big so he isn't disturbed by noise from us moving around.

@Brobot sorry for your loss. It will be difficult going forward but try to hold onto all the good memories and hug those you love a little bit tighter

Well I've managed to give DD a bottle for the past two days. She now just guzzles it with no issues. Has anyone attempted combination feeding? I feel a bit lost now as have no idea re formula feeding!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/3659078-The-March-ers-2019-Baby-Talk-3

Made a new thread ladies link above