Just Mumming Thread 7 - the grads grads cope with walking, own rooms and have little time for shagging

[LaLaLaaaa]

New thread! Roll call...

la, remember it gets coldest between 1-3 so if little la is waking up try a vest with sleep suit, long sleeved then it should cover the coldest part of the night too.

I didn't really wake her as when I went on she was stirring as she was on her front and trying to get back over.
Her eyes were closed tho...hmmm

Hang on - they are mad at you because you're bf!? Are they fucking insane??

I never told you that my pil turned up at the hospital on sat. They were here visiting b when he got sick and it was all a bit stressful because they are a bit awkward and think I'm neurotic and so when I said he needed to go to dr there was a lot of awkward silence and 'well we left our shoes at your house and need to get them' chat.

So me and dh ended up taking b to hospital and leaving them to their own devices.

Next day at hospital dh said 'my mum and stepdad are coming this afternoon'. I was like 'nooooooo! I don't want loads of people around me'

They turned up just as the nurses came to take b for lumbar puncture. I was in floods of tears and they were just standing awkwardly looking at me.

Why oh why can't people put others first when it comes to precious grandchildren?

Will check back and update fully later but have a thread in 'infant feeding' called nipple preference if anyone had a minute or any advice. Stressing out a bit!

(Sorry, trying to cook and kind grumpy infant but need help!)

Which section is infant feeding in? Just looked and can't find it

Feed the world - who know why!

Breastfeeding your baby tee? You selfish caaaah! Get him some diet cokes in and then everyone can have a go on him.

I have two sets of PILS, as DH's parents divorced and both remarried. Lucky old me. I think they're all a bit about my parenting choices but haven't been too vocal about it yet thankfully...

Minipopz has just gone to bed in just a babygrow, if that's any help La.

Ooh will have a gander Dulcet

My MIL is adamant she's babysitting next month for us to have a night out. Which is really kind of her but I'm not entirely sure she'll be prepared for the bedtime screams when there is no boob present.

Your PIL tee

I had an awkward conversation with my step dad today, I said about cutting out dairy and he couldn't get his head around the fact that breast milk is not the same as cows milk. He thought I would have to change to formula and just couldn't comprehend that I just needed to cut out dairy. It's also a bit weird BFing in front of him.

la I sometimes add a blanket/ swaddle after my 11/midnight/ 1am (delete as appropriate) feed if I feel the temperature has dropped. Our room has been consistently 23 degrees for the past few days.

S has been lovely all day but is now screaming again, poor little chap

God, the spelling and autocorrects on my last post are shocking. Carpool= calpol... Teach = tesco.

I think they are directing it all at mr tee, there was quite the unpleasant text row (when did grown ups start having arguments like this!!) going on before the weekend which I was only partially party to, but it sparked from us going out and doing something just the three of us and turning down dinner at his mums. sil saw us having fun on FB and decided to kick off, and it spiralled from there. Mr tee has been good at defending the cluster feeding and glued to sofa stuff, I genuinely think if you haven't done it or lived with someone that has, you don't get how relentless it is, and she doesn't. She keeps offering to babysit, and I can only say no a certain amount of times - can't recall if I've said but TT is refusing expressed milk via bottles at the moment for some reason, we've tried all the bottles and all the teats but he just spits it out, so I can't pump and leave for longer than about an hour, which I'm happy to do with my mum (she used to do the BF demonstrating and stuff in the 80s when she was a nurse so is massive advocate) - I can't help worry if I left him with sil/mil they'd be stuffing formula down his neck. They keep asking me how long I plan to bf for and how much of a shame it is that nobody else can feed him. And it's not 'oh it's a shame that nobody can help you feed in as you've had no sleep' it's more of 'it's a shame we can't play mummy with your new toy baby. We've had numerous discussions on how I don't like him being passed around or held if he's asleep, and in my rage last night I said to MT that if his sister is that bloody interested in what we're up to I'll start sending her pictures of shitty nappies. I get at least a message a day asking how TT is, what are we up to, and it was nice at first, but now i find myself ignoring or lying in my replies because I don't want her to just turn up (this has happened before). I also said that maybe she should start thinking about having a family of her own rather than encroaching on mine, which I am aware makes me a terrible human; but she is married and younger than me and keeps telling everyone she isn't ready for kids.
So why the fucking interest eh!!?
I knew pil were going to be difficult, but not like this!! I hate that they behave like they've got shares in our baby.
Makes me want to bf him until he's bloody 18 just to spite them. I know what you mean la - I don't understand why people behave without thinking esp with a newborn, and esp with the drama you've had with your little guy. It seems some people just can't read the situation, or just need to be told firmly to back the fuck off!

tee it should hopefully die off, too my mum and my PIL a little while to come to terms with just how often H breast feeds. Now they've got their heads around it it's fine. If she cries when they're there they look at me and ask if she needs a feed and hand her over if I say yes with no comments about how often it happens. They'll get used to it! (I hope!)

I find it weird bfing in front of FIL Fleur. He normally leaves the room though bless him.

Oh I am so glad sometimes to have distance between us and family.

Thanks for all your help on thread viroids, will keep that nipple conversation over there.

How anyone can think breastfeeding is selfish is beyond me tee! Especially the amount you have to feed too! Ignore them silly buggers and do what's right for you and TT.

Might be worth just keeping a extra layer near the cot for the early hours la. J is a sweaty baby so just sleeps in sleep suit (full arms and legs) and one folded blanket.

To be honest, I didn't get the milk/dairy thing either fleur! Sounds like you're ready for the challenge though!

la and poz definable feet out are you in the ling advice pages on fb, i can spam a few into the js fb page if not as the ladies in there are fab!

yikes tee they realise it was your vagina the baby came out of right?! offer to let them do all the nappy changes for 'bonding time' from now!

We're increasingly being asked about the bottle feeding situation by both my parents and DH's and I have to admit it's a bit weird, with A I'm more than happy to pack her off to the nearest unsuspecting grandparent, I think because PiL had so much input, she felt as much 'theirs' to me as she did 'mine' especially after I went back to work but I feel quite possessive over E, she is 'mine' and I don't know if that's the BFing, not having so much constant input or just that I'm in a happier place mentally this time round than I was with A so i've bonded with her better. I hate even giving her over to family for a quick cuddle because it feels like I'll never get her back though I'm more than happy to palm her off on strangers at slimming world

I have a weird lump in the side of my breast and I can't be bothered expressing to see if it goes away. It's on the side which is sore (nipple is sore during feeds, lump isn't sore). Haven't fed off that side for maybe 5 1/2 hours so could be that, although rest of my breast isn't hard. I'm not going to get mastitis am I? Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Limited experience wil but I had a lump under my arm which I got rid of my massaging lightly as I fed. Must have been blocked duct or something. Worth a try?

Has kellymom got any advice on that wil? That's usually my first stop. I would think it's a blocked duct but could become mastitis if not treated so definitely try massaging

Sounds like a blocked duct Wil - you need to get a warm bath and work it out. I had to do it a few times when I first started bfing... not pleasant. Please don't leave it!

I had blocked ducts last time and they were red and sore. Although maybe it's just not had time to get sore yet. I gave her a short feed off it when she woke up twenty minutes ago but no change. She'll be up in an hour or so, so I'll try massaging it as she feeds and if no joy will hit the shower in the morning. Thanks.

Oh Fleur I hope my last message didn't come across as insensitive! I just assumed you were ff and not be (duh! Please forgive me!)
But yes if you try cutting out dairy you will probably see a difference

Tee they're idiots if they think you're selfish for bfing your baby.

I've got my MiL coming round tomorrow as she's going away for a month as of Wednesday. I don't know whether to be glad about it or not.

It's been a weird one this evening but in a nice way. Both pests were bathed and dressed and put in their respective cots and both are asleep. This is normal behaviour from P but certainly not from R. He's just had a dream feed and he's still zonked! I'm about to go to sleep myself- fingers crossed he doesn't wake up until 3ish so I can get 4 hours in.

Was Mumsnet broken overnight, couldn't post anything.

Just going back to routines, La, I agree that it really is early days to worry about that. And if you feed on demand you'll have a lovely, plentiful milk supply. I spent (wasted) a lot of time trying to get my first into a sleeping/feeding routine, which I sort of regret now. Wish I'd allowed myself to just enjoy and be close to him more, babyhood is so brief.

I couldn't establish a routine now if I wanted to as life here is dictated by the whims of the deranged threenager.

Tee, what a bloody nightmare with your in-laws. It's unbelievable how intrusive some people can be. We haven't got any family nearby and although it's hard doing everything on our own, like Wil I am grateful for that distance from DP's family sometimes. Do wish mine we're closer, though.

After having pooed all over me in the night, baby Snap vomited all over me this morning. He is very comfortable in our relationship.

Wil, what are the symptoms of silent reflux in your experience?

Yeah, MN been down for hours a a hours now snap. Thank god it's back! Overnight feeding feels longer with nothing read and I just end up googling shit! Sounds like a messy day at your end.

Is be interested in the silent reflux experience too wil, trying to establish if we have a reflux issue here.

How did the night go pixie?

H had silent reflux too, she basically screamed all the time, like something hurt! Docs said he throat would be getting burnt by the acid and that she swallowed it back down instead of being sick so it hurt twice. She was worse when trying to get her to sleep as lying down lets more acid up, and a little better during the day when upright. She also fed all the time as the milk helped soothe her throat and would scream after 5 mins off the boob!

Hello again, grad grads. After a little more advice if possible. went to an nct class last night on breastfeeding and wanted to see if any of you could help with recommendations for electric breast pumps? Have read a lot of reviews and probably just confused myself more! Also wondered when the best time to start expressing would be - should you leave it a few weeks before trying to give ebf milk in a bottle, or is that too late? We also got told a lot about nipple confusion if you add dummies or bottles too soon -so how soon is too soon?
Never mind nipple confusion - I'm confused! Thank you for any words of wisdom

I've heard good things about the medela pumps Deeply. I only have an Avent manual pump, but I've never been very committed to expressing... I think they say to introduce bottles no earlier or later than 4-6 weeks, or once breastfeeding is well established. I think "they" also say not to start expressing until bf is established... but I'm not sure if that matters as long as you keep feeding. Newborns feed A Lot. So you might struggle to fit it in at first. Personally, I think nipple confusion is a load of cowpoo. There's no evidence base for it whatsoever. Mini P would never take a bottle but he had a dummy from two weeks old and happily continued to bf. Its not something I'd worry too much about tbh. HTH.

Whatcha been googling Dulce??