September 2014 - Rocking and Rolling

[FATEdestiny]

Our babies are rocking and rolling, crawling and climbing into the second half of their first year.

Let the fun continue...

sleep much better here for the last 4 nights since we have been staying with pil. just 1 or 2 wake ups instead of 3-4. not sure if it's mil's lavender spray, him being in his own room or it being much colder here. we will be making it as cold as possible, spraying her spray and moving the bed as far away from the cot as possible....and if that doesn't work we will be buying travel cot and banishing poor ds to our en suite as we have no where else to put him.

Hi everyone i just wanted to pop in and say hello ?

Team, well done on the Weight loss, you sound really positive ? I've canelled my gym, as I've no sitter so I do lots of walking (don't we all!) And exercise dvd. I've just bought charlotte crosbys dvd and it's really good, it's also in three minute segments which is handy with the little ones. I find the lack of sleep/broken sleep making me want to eat crap ??

I find cheesy foods help baby sleep better. We have good night's and er..well bad ones. Dh is moaning alllll the time about how tired he is and it's driving me mad. I do all night waking, everything. Anyone have this?

Hi white!

First nursery settling in session today, and it seemed to quite well. The only time she cried was when I went back in to pick her up!!!

Nights are a little mixed. Better than they were, but still not great. I'm very lucky that DH pretty much shares the nights, so I'm not too zombie like.

She has another cold!!!!

Dh is moaning alllll the time about how tired he is and it's driving me mad. I do all night waking, everything. Anyone have this?

My DH often moans about being tired. But to be fair, he is tired. He is usually in bed an hour before me.

I do all the night wakings and everything but DH is still disturbed when DD wakes. He then has to get up and go to work all day on perpetually broken sleep. I have the broken nights but can nap and/or have a lazy day as often as required. DH can't.

I guess the problem would come if DH were to start some form of competitive tiredness, claiming to be more tired than me (or vice versa). DH knows that if he complains too heavily I will gladly swap sides of the bed and he can do the night wakings. So he knows not to make too much of his tiredness and just to go to bed early.

Team, oh no, they suck. Can you elivate her head? If she is now sleeping straight onto the mattress in cot then you could put a phone book under the head end of mattress. My little one sleeps on a sleepyhead and I put two folded towels under his head.

Fate, dh often goes to bed later than me, its just every other sentence is how tired he is. I'm fed up of the negativity and the moaning. I want to scream I'm bloody tired too you know but I just get on with it. Oh and he keeps telling me how his friends/works tell him their babies sleep great, he reads online that ours should be sleeping through now so what's wrong...making me feel like I'm doing something wrong. I keep telling him it is what it is I can't do any more. Tonight I've been banished back to the nursery so as to not to disturb him any more than is needed.

Oh stuff that whiteblossom, he needs to man up!

My DH doesn't like it when my reply to him saying he is tired is "yes, so am I". I can understand his point of view, in that he is allowed to be tired. That doesn't take away from me being tired too and that it doesn't matter who is most tired - just that sometimes we both are. All he usually wants from me is something along the lines of "I know, its pants, lets have a cuddle". Mainly just acknowledgment.

But I have absolutely zero sympathy if DH isn't helping himself with regards to tiredness. He's get nothing but distain from me if he was going to bed late or God forbid banishing me and baby to another room for his benefit. Dh know that I won't be getting up to go to DD in another room so she is in with us until she is sleeping through consistently.

White long time no news; glad you decided to say hello.
To be honest I would just say to your dh you fix the sleeping if you can!!

Bad mummy award warning : I gave ds a big pillow tonight because he was sleeping really badly without one as he has a cold and I can't take it like last night for too many more nights. Is that terrible? He is sleeping beautifully right now! And before you say, no, putting something underneath the mattress did not work.

Whiteblossom, DS slept through from 8 weeks to 4 months. I obviously was amazing and did everything right.

Now he wakes 3 times a night. Obviously because I'm doing everything wrong.

Obviously.

Or DS might not have read the baby manual and isn't like other DH's mates babies. What with being an individual little human being with a mind of his own rather than being a performing robot.

Does your DH sleep the exact recommended 8 hrs a night? Ask him why he doesn't if he brings up the issue again. See what his reply is...

white I really feel for you, your dh sounds maddening! Perhaps pipe up with 'I read online that husbands are really supportive about sleep issues with a baby but mine doesn't seem to be, I wonder what's wrong with him'.

We promised before DS was born that we wouldn't compete on tiredness, it's been hard not to but we mostly do stick to it. At 3am it's hard not to bite though. DS screamed from 3.15-4.45 last night. Most unusual. And incredibly frustrating!

We have fallen out once about sleep, and it resulted in agreeing we get one morning each at the weekend to do as we please. Do most others do this?

nazly I wouldn't worry about the pillow if he can safely move around. Isn't that the only risk, when they can't move their face out of the pillow? Unless there's another risk I'm not aware of. If it's helping him sleep then it makes sense! When they have a cold I pretty much live by 'anything goes'.

Lily, i love that response, I'm going to use that! ? we alternate lie ins at the weekend, only it results in me getting up because the baby is screaming his head off and dh is losing his temper...I step in and er this weekend the bastard went back to bed!! Dh goes on and on about how he has to go to work blah blah blah it doesn't matter if I'm in tears in the night because baby is awake again or won't go back down. He says he is doing everything he can and he can't cope.

I've told him to go and stay with my mum and dad. I also suggested taking kids to hotel, eldest ds would love this so we could make it into a school holiday trip type thing, but dh said oh no ill go....er yeah of course YOU want to fucking go, would you like me to pack a bag for you? Dh thinks I'm being unreasonable but like fate said he needs to man up.

I'm with Nazly, if your DH thinks sleep is an issue white, then just inform him that baby's sleep is now his problem to solve! If he's not helping himself by going to bed early, then he deserves no consideration in terms of tiredness at all.

Sorry your DS had a scream last night Lilly, hope he's feel better soon.

Crossed post with you White.

I'm sorry to be so blunt, be he does sound like a bit of a twonk. The whole losing patience with baby is just an excuse, I wonder how much is actually deliberate (which is a horrible thought) as a way to get out of having to do get up with the children.

Fate I've had the same thought myself. ??

White, it really does sound like your husband isn't pulling his weight. At the moment I'm not back at work, and DH works with a long commute, but he still helps out with nights. Sometimes he is clearly knackered, so I tell him to have an early night, but most of the time he does the first feed so I can get a good block of sleep at the beginning of the night.

Losing his patience with LO sounds horrid, and I agree with FATE that it could just be contrived!

I really like Lilly's suggestion!!! It sounds like very serious chat may be necessary, if you think it would help?!

Sorry you had a tough night Lilly. Maybe a growth spurt?

We actually had quite a good night last night, even though DD has a cold and was very bunged up by the morning.

I think I may have noticed a pattern in that she seems to sleep better when the calpol plug in is on. Has anyone else noticed this? I was looking at what us in it, and it seems to be decongestant and relaxing essential oils. So maybe the relaxing ones are helping

It's a shame that the refil pads are more than £1 each. That's a lot if I were to use them every day. Do you think if I bought the essential oils and tried to replicate the mix I could just add a couple of drops to an old used pad? Or maybe invest in an aromatherapy thing?

I'm going to try using it for the next few nights, and then stop. See if I'm right that she seems to do better with it on!!!

I don't know if there are some guidelines or something on essential oil use with babies. I'm not certain. but I do know that the likes of Olbas Oil (the normal one) isn't recommended for babies so you have to use the more diluted baby version. So maybe you can use them but are supposed to use very diluted? Not entirely sure.

So today DD was terrorising the dog crawling around my feet in the kitchen this morning and she did a little bit of sick. Dog licked it up. Which is gross but nothing unusual. I was washing the pots and noticed DD had some sick around her mouth, so I promptly wiped her face with the dishcloth. Oh the hygiene! I guess it's time to put away the steriliser, given my lackadaisical attitude.

Is anyone else still sterilising?

This works do a baby room spray from boot s £16 ouch! I have one that is boots own I think £6 ish, seeing it mentioned up thread I thought I would check it out. I think you have to be careful with oils...

Everyone struggling with sleep - are your los in their own rooms or still in with you? We saw a significant and consistent improvement in dd's sleep when she went into her own room. Almost overnight we went from 1/2 feeds per night to sleeping through for 11+ hours.

Has anybody left babies overnight yet? We might need to leave dd with my mum for a night when she's 10 months (my mum's her fave). Is that ok or too soon???

We're still sterilising Fate but I'm starting to think why do I bother. DS was happily wiping his dummy across the floor & put it back in his mouth before I could get to him the other night.

Definitely agree about sleep being better once they're in their own room. It was certainly the case for us. Sleeping through was almost instant instead of wake ups every few hours for a dummy.

I've had 3 nights away from DS now. Twice he's stayed at my mums, first time he was 4 months. Then last week I had to go to a work conference so DP had two days off work. DS loved staying with granny & she loved having him. It was very odd the first time, particularly as we ended up staying in as we were both ill.

Has anybody started trying to get rid of / reduce the dummy? DS had almost abandoned it but now really struggles to settle for a nap / bedtime without it.

Hi Ladies,

Bad couple of days here, both me and DH were struck down with a norovirus type bug so that was fun now that A is more active and doesn't just want to sit in his bouncy chair all day. At one point he was being passed between me and DH while the other ran upstairs. Luckily A seems to have avoided it! We are on the mend now too, which is good as we are off to Ireland visit the PIL on Thursday.

Still sterilizing here too, I think it was a good thing the last few days, although A does the dragging dummy across floor/sofa/table too. In fact he was rubbing it on his penis yesterday while I was changing his nappy. I only turned my head for a moment to get the nappy bag! Luckily I managed to get the dummy of him before it went in his mouth, but god knows if I have missed that before!

We left A for the first time overnight at 8 weeks old, we had been invited to a no kids wedding, but he was with my parents at our house and was fine. Have done it a couple of times since, and will be doing it again next week when we go and see the Foo Fighters and are staying out in a hotel (the luxury haha)

We also agreed to the alternate lie ins at the weekend, although DH is naturally an early riser and A tends not to wake until 8 so that is a lie in anyway for DH. Generally at the moment we both get up with him unless one of us has been out the night before, but this will probably change once I am back at work and getting up much earlier than I do now through the week!

WRD to the dummy, some days we use it a lot, others not so much. Really it depends on his mood, I tend to only give him it if he really wants it, but didn't want to get rid of it altogether just yet. He mainly uses it for naps though, but I think it will come in handy for the flight later in the week!

Cumbrian - norovirus is horrid! Glad you're feeling better.

I haven't left DD overnight yet and don't plan to in the near future - think i'm more attached to her than she is to me!

I'm still sterilising bottles, probably more out of habit than anything. I don't have a dishwasher though so I do worry that hand washing up isn't effective enough. If I had a dishwasher i'd probably think that was sufficient now.

I get up with DD every morning whether DP is at work or not. He probably would at the weekends if I asked but I wouldn't have a lie in, i'd just listen to what he was doing with her so may aswell just get up myself!

Am a complete worry wart/control freak!

Oh, also am another that's seen an improvement in baby's sleep since moving to her own room! I think moving from crib to bigger cot had a lot to do with it.

Hi all.

Cumbrian hope you are feeling better now. I caught norovirus once from work (I'm a nurse) and it was awful so can sympathise!

We're still struggling with sleep and Jessica has been in her own room for ages now since she was 8 weeks old actually as she was such a noisy sleeper she was keeping me awake all night . Last night for the first time I started diluting her milk with water and hopefully over the next 2-3 weeks get to a point where we dilute more and more until she eventually gets offered water only if she wakes up which will hopefully take away from the appeal of waking in the night. If that doesn't work then we may start to do CC. It's not ideal and I know some people hate the idea but I'm knackered, (last night she woke 4 times) and I'm going to be doing 14 hour shifts when I'm back at work and need to be at a point where I can get a decent nights sleep. I'm sure it will be better for her as well to get some sleep. Fingers crossed the 'diluted milk' trick works though and then we don't have to!

I had one night away with a friend whilst DH had Jessica but we haven't left with anyone else yet. Quite frankly I'd love to but no-one has offered (both sets of GP's for example very unkeen on doing child-care). They won't even take her in the daytime so we've got no chance of an overnight break together.

We're still sterilising too but think maybe over the next month or two will probably give it up. We're going to Majorca in 2 and a half weeks (wahoo!!!) and will definitely do it there (because obviously bugs will multiply more in the heat etc) but I think after we get back we may start to stop it.

Still struggling with eating too here, particularly since she's been teething. She's pretty much refusing food all day and then relents in the evening (probably because she's starving!) but even then is unhappy and whingey about it. Sigh. Is anyone else still struggling with food / weaning?

Ooh thanks everyone about nights spent elsewhere. You've given me the confidence to go for it, especially as I know DD loves being with my mum

Topsy DD only has her dummy for falling asleep (naps and bedtime)/but I've no idea how to cut it out. She refuses to sleep without it unless she's a KO anyway. Perhaps FATE knows the best way to wean them off? As DD has it for so little time I'm tempted to leave it and then ditch it when she's old enough to give it to Santa/Easter Bunny, etc.

Once I finally get DS sleeping in his cot I'm going to try him in his own room as an experiment, but I'm in no hurry really. Maybe once this cold is over until I find another excuse

The only thing I'd still sterilise is bottles, if I ever use them again. I thought that was due to the nasties in the milk, rather than general dirt from around the house which he gets plenty of

Thanks ladies, much better today .

A is getting better with food, but still doesn't eat too much. He almost had a full slice of toast for breakfast today haha. He does prefer to feed himself, and I think he has eaten loads til I take him out of the bumboo/high chair and find loads of food around him. Although today he was digging around his lap for more food as I didn't give him some quick enough!

Still sterilising here too !

J never had a dummy, but the twins did until they were about 18 months and I phased them out - gradually reducing them. It wasn't as bad as I thought - i kept them for a while incase I needed them again, but never did. You will just know when the time is right.

apples We also found that J slept better when we put him in his own room. May have been pure luck or coincedence but it transformed his sleeping.

We have left J overnight twice - once on my birthday in January and once at the beginning of this month. Both times with my mum who he sees a lot. He's not a clingy baby and was good both times.

Today I went into work for the whole day to try and prepare for my return on the 8th. J stayed with my Mum. I missed him terribly so had to try and focus on work stuff - but there wasn't much for me to do so it wasn't a usual work day. His little face lit up when I collected him, and he had a great day at my Mum's so I can't complain.