January 2014- the one where the babies move more, but sleep less!

[AMillionNameChangesLater]

Hope this is ok!

On a completely unrelated note - Felix you were looking for a play tray alternative. I spotted an underbed storage box in tesco today - low large and with a fitted lid so have bought one for sand/waterplay.(£5) Would that be any use?

MrsG does the anxiety just surround sleep issues or does it extend in to other parts of your life? Have you seen your gp about it? I suffered badly with anxiety for a few years and I know how awful it is so you definitely have my sympathy. I've never taken S swimming as I have a fear of water I know she would love it but it scares the crap out of me!

Nature that's the sort of thing I've been looking for but there's not anything near me. I thought that sort of thing would be very popular where I live. There's a baby sewing group in Ilkley which is about 5 miles away from here but it's for babies who don't move It would have been perfect for me if she was a year younger.

Puggle that's a fab idea, id never thought of that. I'll see if I can get one cheap. Thank you

Million that's annoying. I wanted to join the one in Leeds only because it was called 'Buns & Roses' and there's also another called 'The Rolling Scones' unfortunately the one here doesn't have a hilarious name.

Sorry I've just been thinking about that I've been posting a lot recently and it's always a massive pity party. I hope no one minds but I've not been feeling great recently and don't really have anyone to talk to. It's good to have somewhere to vent but I know I'm being a bit OTT all the time so sorry!!

mrsg I have terrible anxiety problems linked to P's previously rubbish sleep and the impact it had on my physical and mental health. Even though she sleeps well now I still feel sick every time I hear her on the monitor in the night. I was actually discussing exactly this with my postnatal depression counsellor this morning, and we are going to try to work out where the anxiety comes from historically for me, and what triggers it so I can try different methods to deal with it better. I am so sorry you are feeling like this, it is utterly horrible and colours every part of your day when it is bad. Would it be worth you getting some help with it, or with L's sleep, or both?

felix I never think of your posts as a pity party! If you can't vent on here, where on earth can you?

I get anxious at night. I have no idea why, I've lived a very boring life, there is no reason for it but it' happened as long as I an remember. I find it very hard to go upstairs alone after dark, even when every light in the house is on. It's become worse since having L as now I'm scared of something happening to her. I find it very hard being in a different room to her at night and in the evenings. How well she sleeps doesn't seem to affect it though, which is lucky! DH mentioned it to the GP when we went for the 6 week check (I think) and he offered me a prescription of something, but the idea of medication worries me. I might go back as I really don't want L to pick up on it.

With the pram, it's in part because it's in the living room which feels 'safer' to me somehow, because she's close to me and because she is easier to get back to sleep. She doesn't really sleep any better in there!

I second this felix I never think of your posts as a pity party! If you can't vent on here, where on earth can you?

MrsG I get the feeling of not wanting to take medication. The way I think of things is this. If you had a headache, you'd take paracetamol wouldn't you? Why should this be anything different?

Parenting is a mess of anxiety, wonderment, panic, and crazy moments. If there's something you can take to make the less-fun moments better, then there's nothing wrong with taking them. I would! And do, with Coffee and Gin

So I said to F tonight when his dad came home "can you say - Dada hi?" While waving... And F waved and said " Hi Dada"! So cute!!!!

Am only 1,000,000% 1% annoyed it wasn't "hi mama".

...makes me slightly less worried about the sustained utter lack of walking :) (if I hear one more time how his cousin walked at eight months...)

Big non MN group hug all round?? Feb blues maybe...

mrsg that sounds really tough. Anxiety is all consuming and it must be difficult to have it triggered around something like nighttime which happens every day (I mean as opposed to eg flying which you could opt out of). Perhaps it's worth talking to someone about the alternatives to medication if you really aren't comfortable with it? I agree with million's sentiments though. Since having E I've had thyroid problems (that make me fat rather than thin dammit!) and I was really reluctant to take the tablets as they are basically synthetic hormones, until my aunt who is a nurse pointed out that my body just isn't making something and the tablets replace it. That's all. It's just righting something that is a bit off kilter right now.

felix I have never once felt like you were having a pity party so no apologies please. It must be difficult if S isn't sleeping well - I didn't realise how much the lack of sleep effected me until she started sleeping again. I thought it was perfectly normal to be able to start an argument in an empty room . It's been the school holidays here (the 6 weeks ones) so everything activity wise stops so we have been doing nothing, and it's made me just really lethargic towards everything. I may have mentioned I'm not keen about starting work again () but I'm hoping having some thing to do will give me a bit more motivation more generally, and a bit more lust for life. If you are similar, I think sticking with some of the groups etc until you find the right ones might help. And makes weekends more manageable if your DH has things on? Maybe even give baby sewing a go unless they have a rule about non moving babies? You and S can be trail blazers

angel according to any relatives I speak to emily is the only baby in the history of the world our family not to take first steps before her first birthday. According to any random person I meet in the street I should be grateful she doesn't walk because I'll never keep up with her. Sooooo much unwanted helpful advice out there.

I am going to take some of my own advice and do something. Anything
wanders off to clean the kitchen, living the dream....

Further random thought felix... Could we do a virtual sewing group?? I need something to stop me watching TV constantly and my sewing machine is gathering dust. I go out and buy materials, stick stuff on Pinterest and then stack them nicely in a drawer. Could do with the incentive to try something new?? Maybe pick something every month to make and compare photos and me ask you loads of questions when I get stuck??

Will go to the kitchen now and leave you all to sleep in peace

sunshine I know what you mean about needing to do something! When ds1 was Henry's age I quilted, not very well, but it was lovely. Just something for me. Sadly I think running is becoming my thing with Henry. I get at least 30-45 mins alone 3 times a week, outside work too. It's going well.

Which leads me to now. He's bloody awake and crying his I'm -still-tired-but-I'm-pissed-I'm-awake cry. Like it's my fault! I brought him into our bed where he kept laying his head on my chest to sleep, then crying. It isn't fun. I've put him back in his cot with white noise on, but he's remaining crying every couple of minutes. Not hard, or too loud, but just loud enough I can't go back to sleep! Which is really irritating

Thanks all, I might go back to the Doctor and see what he thinks is best :)

Aww, Angel that's so cute! I can't wait for L to start talking.

A virtual sewing group sounds fun, DH bought me a sewing machine for our anniversary last year (our cotton anniversary) and I only used it a handful of times.

L stayed in her own cot from 7-7 last night, woke twice for 10 minutes each! This has literally never happened before, about 4 times was the least she'd ever woken. She does have a bit of a cough, and tends to sleep better when ill, so I'm trying not to get my hopes up that it's a permanent change!

MrsGSR am up for a seeing club... Got a seeing machine for Christmas and have no idea how to use it!

Having geeky moment of joy which will only mean something to people born in the early 80s. I really wanted an A La Carte Kitchen in the mid 80s
(www.doyouremember.co.uk/memory/a-la-carte-kitchen) but never got one. Then... Saw one on eBay a couple of years ago and bought it. Just realised now we've bought the new house I can get it out and play with it with F!! SO excited!

Sorry sunshine, see the sewing group was your idea!! Would love to take part

Mrsg that sounds promising. I hope it continues, but I would have thought that having a cough would wake her more rather than less (being hopeful - that is the case for O anyway ). It is definitely worth going back and speaking to your GP. Even if you still aren't sure about taking medication, it's worth speaking to them as they may also have some alternatives to try. Do you think counselling would work? I've tried counselling before and it wasn't for me (my counsellor tried to get me to talk to an empty chair so I just felt like a dick!), but I did find hypnotherapy quite useful, so there maybe something like that you could try.

Urgh, I had pregnancy insomnia last night, and Dh was snoring really badly so I took myself off to the spare room. Only that then meant I was next to O's room so could hear her coughing all night . Absolutely knackered this morning.

I'm the same as sunshine, I go out to buy more wool and see some lovely fabric, buy it with all good intentions, and then it just sits in the box! I feel really bad as I still haven't made O anything (not even a small crochet hat or anything!) despite that fact I have usually made a blanket for all my friends babies.

So Dh is going to ask his mum to babysit for us on Monday, and is going to sort out somewhere for dinner. Really looking forward to it. Just hope his mum says yes

Oo nature best of luck!

Dh has made an appointment at the Dr to get a vasectomy. Hopefully they'll refer him to be done. Although I've just scared myself with reading about the possible complications. 10% of men are in a lot of pain after having it done. Crap. I cant be on hormones, I'm on a 2 week cycle! Which is getting in the way of sex. And I believe in life at conception so the coil is out, and I hate condoms. Basically, I'm beginning to panic

That must feel great mrsg - well done L and long may it continue! We found that going into her own cot in her own room made all the difference, I hope it is the same for you.

I'd be up for sewing club - I used to make clothes and curtains but haven't touched my sewing machine for just over a year (funny that...) I had grand plans to make Ps clothes, but as yet haven't managed anything.

million bear in mind that it is the men reporting that they are in a lot of pain. My DH is quite good at over-egging that, not sure if other men are the same but suspect they might be I'm sure he'll be fine. Now get him to talk to my DH!

He will get an appointment through the post within 3 weeks! Crazy fast

Wow million that is quick! Not much time to change his mind, but I guess they only let them do it if they are pretty adamant.

I don't know how Dh would feel about it. Might ask him just to find out! It's a good solution if you are certain that you don't want anymore kids. Less risk than a woman having her tubes tied.

Wow that is fast million! I'm sure everything will be fine.

MrsG so good to hear she slept well last night. When does your DH go away and for how long?

Nature hope she can babysit, dinner sounds fab sorry you didn't get much sleep last night. I do not envy you with the pregnancy insomnia!! Hopefully it won't last long. How long until you are due now?

Angel that's so cute S won't say mama either even though I constantly try and make her do it! She says dada all the time and is obsessed with him.

Sunshine that's a fab idea. Even if it's not everyone doing the same thing each month, we could maybe force each other to choose a project and kick arses if it's not finished by the end of the month. We have half term next week so no groups on at all. I am dreading it! Don't know how you cope with 6 weeks of it. I'm ignoring the fact we will have 6 weeks in summer and not even thinking about it. When does your new job start?

Thanks for the kind words re pity party. You know when you feel like you just moan all the time? I'm having one of those moments.

Sorry if I missed anyone! On the app and can't see everyone's posts.

Haha Felix I think we all moan! . Tis' the moaning that gets us through!

I am hoping the insomnia doesn't last. I don't think it will, I think it was just I was feeling quite down about something I saw on FB last night before I went to bed so was out of sorts.

I'm not due till mid July but I all ready look about 7 months pregnant. The bump is very big! Will post a pic on FB for you all to see

Just been for the MMR and it wasn't as bad as I expected. S cried for 5 minutes but is fine now and pulling all of the washing off the airer

Glad the MMR wasn't too bad for S Felix. waiting for the letter to come through here, can't say I'm particularly looking forward to it!

Another one here that is obsessed with saying Dad and not much in the way of Mum!

Things are a little tense in the Merry household. A is being massively clingy at the moment, and Dh being a SAHD is finding it really difficult. There aren't really any groups around us that have a mix of mums and dads so he is just home with him a lot which doesn't help. According to Wonder Weeks he is in a stormy period which is due to finish in 2 days, wishful thinking?! So now I feel guilty to A for being at work, and guilty to Dh that he is looking after him, even though he hasn't really said or done anything to make me feel guilty. It's just tough to see him struggling.

Oh well, home time in 2 minutes, let's see what carnage greets me when I get home!

Nature I think I'd rather counselling, but we're only here for another 9-12 months and apparently some areas have 6 month waiting lists. I'm going to look into it though.

Felix He's away for a few days the weekend after next, but I'm going to stay with a cousin for another cousin's engagement party. He's away for the first week, maybe two, of March, and he's hoping to get on another course in the next few months.

I'd love to sew some clothes for L, I've made a few little tutus with some spare organza I had and I'd love to make some dresses. And maybe some curtains and cushions too.

Hopefully she will be ok sleep-wise when he's away. Definitely see your gp though if you can. And get sewing

Angel when DP came in tonight I remembered what you said and told S to say 'hello daddy' and she did twice!! I couldn't believe it, so thank you

Merry hope things weren't too bad when you got home. It's a shame your DH feels like there's not many groups he can go to. I understand if he feels awkward with a load of mums though! I know my DP wouldn't go to any if the roles were reversed here.

It would still be worth going on a waiting list for the counselling if that's what you'd prefer mrsg, once they are seeing you I'm sure you could be transferred when you move.

OMFG, P just woke up crying and wouldn't settle for DH. I went in to see her, and as I picked her up she was sick all over me. Poor thing I don't know whether she just upset herself so much that she was sick, or whether she's actually ill. She's had a bath and gone to sleep in her cot, but I'm quite worried about leaving her there in case she's sick again. She just seemed really tired and not especially poorly though. If it is soft play norovirus again I'm going to send in a fumigation team to sort it out. Plague pit