October 2006

[Bronze]

Am I the first one here or have I completely missed the thread? If this is the only thread please come and join me
Bron

my LO won't take a dummy - we've tried several times and he just spits it out.

totally - try what I did this morning, it worked really well - feed your LO, then wait about an hour. Then express. When you can't get any more put your LO on one boob till you get a letdown reflex, then continue expressing. I would be really wary of using formula. You need to stimulate your boobs to produce more milk not less, and by substituting a feed with formula you will reduce your supply. Post on the breast and bottle feeding forum for advice as there are loads of BFing counsellors lurking there and they are good with this kind of thing.

also - having LO in bed with me in the latter part of the night seems to really help my supply - woke up this morning with really really full boobs even though he'd fed during the night, as did going to bed early (8pm!) and making sure I ate LOADS yesterday. Anyone else found similar?
And on that subject: I weighed myself yesterday. I am exactly the same as when I came out of hospital

Hear you loud and clear girlygale. My ds3 was being a real little sod yesterday evening. Said 'no' to everything! Wouldnt eat his dinner,wouldnt get in his bath,wouldnt even hand sweets out to the trick and treaters. Was a pain to settle into bed last night too which NEVER happens. Both dh and I realy try to involve him in everything. We even made some Bob The Builder cup cakes with him the other day which he took to nursery and was realy proud.Guess it will take a little while for him to adjust.
Yes sallyrosie Ive found having Edward in bed with me realy stimulates my supply in the morning! Trouble is he wont sleep in his moses basket now at all so thats the down side to it. I was thinking of getting a dummy too. None of my other boys had one though so Im a bit sceptical at the moment. Ill give it a bit longer to see if Edward gets into any sort of routine in the near future!

Morning All

Totally - know how you feel. Breastfeeding is very hard work.

I have been expressing my right boob as my nipple is very sore, it feels like a red hot poker is stabbing it when she latches on and burns for ages afterwards. Not so bad using rugby hold but still very sore. Read that you nbeed to let them suckle too as this sends the brain messages to produce more, whereas, just expressing doesn't. My HV is coming today and I am going to ask about giving her formula 1xdaily, as her weight gain is very slow and during the day she is starving. Had a big day out on Monday- shopping for footwear as my feet have gone up insize - my OH did suggest the joke shop or the circus wear shop!! Expressed left boob yesterday morning and only got 1oz, seemed to have less milk in generaol yesterday. Could it have been due to busy day previously and not eating drinking as much as was out?

Girlygale - my LO sucked her fingers furiously from 2 days old, first I thought she might have been teething (inexperience) apparently babies have sucking reflex, which they need to soothe themselves, I got her a dummy and she uses it when she needs to work off her sucking energy, then spits it out. I also let her suck her fingers if she wants to. It works really well to settle her.

Sallyrosie - I try to get to bed about 9 every night now and feed her whilst reading/relaxing. Rest really helps me and her! I am constantly starving too - and same weight as after delivery - too heavy, however will worry about it later - too starving to care now - need energy to survive!!

Sorry for giant post!!

sally and rumpel, I'm also the same weight as post delivery, but tum is finally going in (a bit).

Doing the cindy crawford postnatal workout (have only managed the 10 minute one so far).

Darius is now firmly on the unmentionable routine, so goes to bed at 7pm and sleeps till 10.30 (feed), then feed at 2.30 or 3, then feed at 7 am, so slowly starting to feel sane as I can rely on 6 hours sleep, albeit broken up. DH went back to Kazakhstan yesterday which was a wrench, but he may be coming back for a short visit at the end of the month, then we'll all go back there together after Christmas..

hope it's not raining over there; here in Belgium it's p+ssing it down!

I don't know what I weighed post delivery but the size of my tummy still is really getting me down. With ds1 it pinged back really quickly but it looks horrible this time. The mw said it's fluid and is normal after a c section but it looks square and hangs down at the bottom. I think it;s going to be ages before I can fit into normal clothes again.

I'm also finding lack of sleep difficult, i get a bit panicky at about 8ish as i start to get really tired and long for a nights sleep!!

all the moaning aside though Toby is doing great.

hi all -

LO in no way in a routine, i just feel as thouh im bumbling through.

does any one else ever feel like f*ck it, just want to give up BF?

i was 14 stone the day before i gave birth, now i weigh 12 and a half... i want to be back to 9 stone...

emzickle as hard as BFing is in these first few weeks I keep in mind 3 things - 1) all the benefits of BFing and 2) the fact that night feeds consist of leaning out of bed and grabbing him from the cot before settling back down into bed - could I face the thought of going and boiling a kettle? no chance! and finally 3) no matter where I am, I always have enough food for him, and I can leave the house in a hurry without having to think about sterilisers and bottles.

Rumpel, I have definitely found that my milk supply is less on days when I have been busy, and I've also noticed that if I've not drunk much it is low. Which then leads to LO frantically feeding for hours...sore boobs...lots of wind in his tum...less sleep...vicious circle
After a chilled out day of me relaxing a bit more, eating a bit more and generally doing a bit less I had loads more milk and a calmer baby.

Can also recommend the unmentionable routine - the fact that LO goes to sleep in his own crib at 7 is just amazing to me - my DD used to be up all evening feeding away and getting crotchety and overtired, then because she was crying I'd assume she was hungry - offer her boob - more sucking on empty boob - swallow air...you can see where this is going...demand feeding is all very well, but babies don't say 'feed me' or 'change me' or 'I'm tired' they just cry, and it takes time before you can tell the difference.

LO slept from 10.30pm to 4.30am. At last a run of sleep. Then from 5.10am to 7.30am not bad.

Been trying for routine but it seems to go a bit wrong daily! Going to put LO in cot at the weekend, first going to introduce the moses basket into the cot.

On the weight issue I thought that I'd lost weight but now not so sure. I am going to wait for 6 week check before I really start to do anything about it. Keep missing out on dinner though, time just flies. Not sure on post delivery weight as always to scared to get on scales.

Oh how I long for a routine. Im a real stickler for it. I hate any kind of school holiday and have to madly arrange days out and activities etc or I crack up due to lack of routine. I hate the early weeks of baby hood because of this. But yes I do find if Ive been out and about my milk seems to be less but then while were out lo sleeps more so doesnt feed so often so it kind of works out in the end.
All you ladies trying to express milk why exactly are you doing it? I killed myself trying to express with ds3 and got so disheartened when I only ended up with a couple of ounces. Turned out my body wasnt producing milk anyway because I had appendicitis. The only reason I expressed was so dh could have a go at feeding lo but he wasnt bothered anyway.
No idea how much I weighed before I was preg, too much probably but alot of people have commented on how slim I look already. Thats another good reason to breast feed .

Well,gave her formula last night,well actually DH did while i was having a nap.I was so angry when i found out as had actually decided against it in the end.She did bring the whole lot back up though and i wont bother with it again.
I have managed to express 9 ounces over the last 18hrs though so feel like im getting somewhere,i might even manage to freeze some.We saw the cranial osteopath again today,i really think she has helped as after the first time we saw her,Lex started sleeping much longer through the night,she tends to do 5-7hrs now.This session she worked on the points that relate to the nerves in the gut which should help with the colic,although the infacol has been quite gd,she has much fewer ripples and actually burps after a feed.
Well im off to express again,have a gd evening all.

Haven't gone anywhere near a set of scales since I was weighed by the mw at 38w, so no idea how much I've lost (I assume I have lost some weight ). Do you geet weighed at the 6 wk check? If not, I may pop into Boots at some point (no scales in house).

Hello0, I was a december mum but DS was born by emergency C-section 11 days ago and is in the neo-natal unit, can I join you girls. And does anyone have any breast feeding tips or combining breast bottle and NG tube tips?

welcome bewilderbeast and congrats on your little one!

We're a friendly lot here on the Oct thread, so you'll feel at home..

BF: well it's going OK for me so far, owing to giving birth in Belgium and spending 5 days in the hospital having the midwives helping with breastfeeding practically at every feed; so I really had no excuse. My main tips would be stay relaxed, drink loads of water, make sure the baby has a wide mouth before going on, and let his head relax a bit into a good position for him. Also, give him long enough, they come off when ready.

having said that, Darius is now sucking his fists and grunting so might have to go and feed him!

Im a bad bad Mum. My ds3 has now learned to wee standing up. This is great as he usualy takes his pants and trousers off each time he goes for a wee and doesnt have to. Was feeding lo and he decided he wanted a wee. Took him while still feeding lo and helped him take down his clothes and his willy was a bit squashed to one side making him wee sideways and on to the floor. I went mad and screamed at him while trying to make his willy go straight and put lo down on the changing station. Anyway wiped him down and cleaned the floor and realised it wasnt that bad. Called ds3 back into the bathroom and gave him the biggest cuddle while crying my eyse out and kissing him loads feeling oh so guilty. Didnt help him keep saying'sorry Mummy' and Love you Mummy'. Oh God Im such a bad Mum. Poor little love. Gave him his bath tonight which dh usualy does and read him an extra story at bed time.Still feel dead guilty though. Hormones bloody hormones.
Sorry just had to share that. Off to bed now. xx

heartbreaking gingerme! dealing with my cat makes me feel guilty enough wnen i hit him for jumping on the changing table virtually on hope's face, i can imagine trying to cope with a toddler with these hormones would be so hard.
two blind children came to our door trick or treating on halloween. they were so polite and asked me if i could tell them what sweets they were touching in the bowl. had to go upstairs and have a hormonal sob afterwards.

hi bewilderbeast. breastfeeding in the nicu is really hard work but i do know people who suceeded and were able to keep it going when they came home. they've probably given you all the tips at the unit, but obviously as much skin to skin contact with lo as possible, and as gemitty said as much rest, food and drink as possible for you. there are some foods/drink that is meant to help with production-fennel tea, lots of carbohydrates and i think sihks prepare a special mix of raw cane sugar, pistachio nuts and other stuff which is meant to work well. other than that i think you have to keep trying them at the breast even if they havent got the suckling reflex going. good luck and remember you're doing your best you can.

re weight loss-i am definately not going near the scales yet, keep looking at them and resisting because it could be miserable.
plus, my tummy has puffed up again as have developed an infection in my uterus and am on antibiotics. of course this had me sobbing half of yesterday as feel am ruining all the good work with colostrum and lo's gut will be stripped of all friendly bacteria.
swizzler, that sounds fab you're getting 3 hr gaps, hope it's still continuing like this

Well, on the plus side W is going for longer betw feeds and is still asleep. On the minus, he's started to wake up properly at about 3am and takes ages to settle back down again 0- by which time DH and I are completely awake and v grumpy!

I am surprised at how quickly he's changing - he can now hold his head up for a brief time, focuses much better, is awake for longer and has discovered some new sounds! It seems like something new is happening every day - so exciting

Welcome Bewilderbeast - hope your LO is doing well. No advice re the nicu bfing, but I know it is really beneficial for prem babies so anything you can do will be great.

Marthahm: sorry to hear you're having a hard time. Make sure you're looking after yourself. And bfing has so many benefits that aren't reduced by antibiotics so don't feel guilty

W just woken up so better go!

DS2 is 2.5 weeks and I am still breastfeeding - although not sure I will ever manage to feed in public - I drown the poor boy with my right boob - it just comes squirting out like a fountain - may make a meet up very interesting!

Midwife discharged me on Monday and weighed ds2 - he is now 9lb 1oz, which I am pleased at. I had forgotten how hard winding is (sorry if I have said this already), but must get better at using the infacol. Also may try a dummy, ds1 had one (don't like them but they do the trick), and part of me would rather he use a dummy than his thumb as you can take a dummy away at some point... but this is only after I have been through it will ds1.

Still no structure to the day/night, had a bad couple of nights, so going to try and stretch feeds to every 3 hours today and see what happens. Although not really sure how I am going to do that!

My parents have just left, been here since Monday, but they are a joy to have staying and ds1 adores them. In laws arrive on Sunday til Wednesday, so we shall see if I am saying the same thing next week! They are lovely, but not the same as your own parents are they. DS1 cried this morning when he realised that our childminder was picking him up from nursery today, rather than me, but i am knackered and want to try and keep to some sort of routine for him.

Not really co-sleeping, but sometimes at night one of us will put ds2 on our chests and sleep sort of sitting up - ds2 loves it and means we can all get some sleep! Would not have done this at all with ds1 - fear of rolling over, plus fear of him getting used to it - think (hope) they are too little at the mo to get into really bad habits. He also seems to really dislike sleeping on his back and we sort of prop him on his side.

Gingme: sympathies -it is so hard isn't it. You know that he will have forgotten all about it and you will be more bothered then him by this.

Whiffy: thanks for info.

Hi All -

I cannot get my LO into a routine at all - it's impossible! Been up since 2.30am this morning. She just fights sleep. Anyone else having the same problem? She cries and cries, when she is sleepy (apart fron night time)and then when she does doze off she cries out in her sleep for a while!

Poor wee soul is STILL not up to her birthweight - only 6lb15oz (BW 7LB) despite being a month old now! Long chat with the HV yesterday and decided to give her 1 formula feed at night. Thought she might sleep for longer last night but it was worse than normal.
There is no rhyme or reason to it in our case!
I am demand feeding as wew need to get her weight up.

Managed to freeze some breast milk now - lucky all of you whose milk squirts and pours out.

GINGEME - expressing to produce more and also so DH can give her bottle at night to let me have a bath/shower/sleep in peace as howling not conducive to relaxation. Also means if I need babysitter there is food available.

Welcome belwilderbeast and congrats - hope your wee one is home soon.

Hello bewilderbeast - I like your name, can deffo relate to it! Hope your LO is OK, would you like to tell us about him?

Biggest tip I can give re bfing (and I've found it tough going getting started with each of mine) is rest and drink. You cannot begin to imagine just how important your rest is. You can drink while doing other things, but not rest while doing anything else. I find a huge difference in my supply after a nap, and if I'm busy and don't rest it's obvious that ds2 is less satisfied by his feeds. So schedule yourself a rest whenever you can - it's more important than any other chore!

Ds2 is feeding at roughly 3h intervals atm, shorter if he doesn't get a good sleep in between. He also has a couple of lomnger gaps - unfortunately they're not during the night!

Can I gatecrash your postnatal thread please? DD (really odd putting DD and not DS!) was born on 26th November. I have a DS who is 3 this month. I lurked on the ante-natal thread a couple of times, but then it just got so long!

DD is lovely, even though she seems to go through 5 hour periods every day of not really knowing what she wants to do (or is it that that she knows what she wants to do but I don't?) So far these periods have started at 12pm, 6pm or my favourite, 12am. Anyway, I am hoping that this is just new born unpredictability and that with a few hints she will work out that not much goes on in our house after about 10pm.

Anyway, I am looking for a bit of advice really. DD is a really sleepy feeder - 5 minutes then snoring. DS was a sleepy feeder too, but I don't think I realised it - I just thought he needed to be fed little and often. I think my bottom was glued to the sofa for weeks. However, with a toddler to look after this isn't really an option with DD - any advice on keeping her awake long enough to get a decent feed? The only thing that I have found makes any difference is changing her or putting her down somewhere not too cosy. Any other top tips?

Message withdrawn

Whiffy here. Am very bored sitting on my bum all day with veeeeeeeeerrrrrrrryyyyyyy slow feeder so decided to add some excitement in my life by changing my nickname to one infinately more appropriate at the moment. hope the name change has ticked through as this is my first post under new name. It is a sad sad life when that is my only excitement.

Actually I will have excitement tomorrow as I haven't done the prep I'm supposed to have completed for a seminar and the tutor is a ballbreaker of a woman. aaarggghhh. Long story but somewhere in the midst of pregnancy I came up with clever idea of getting started on a masters whilst on Maternity leave, so have been going to lectures twice a week for last three weeks. Like duh!, really clever.

Especially as have no clothes that fit thanks to deflated space-hopper where my waist used to be.

And that's before even going to that dark dark place where I acknowledge that I'm older than the lecturers...

Oh and I am reading everyones threads, honest, even if I cant keep up with the posting. I have some rather bizarre advice re sticky eyes - apparantly in Oz the done thing is to put a drop of breast milk in babys eye. may be an old wives tale and sounds v dodgy to me but if anyone else wants to give it a go let me know if it works!

Gingeme & Martha, really empathise on the hormonal thing (though the halloween kids would have had me crying even without being hormonal). Gingeme, I was just as bad the other night. DS didn't want to go to bed and threw a tantrum when I sat him on the toilet.. he refused to do a pee and then walked straight from toilet to his bed and weed all over it, and the carpet, and himself in protest. I came, ooooo, > < this close to smacking him, something I have never done. Had to leave him to cry for a couple of minutes whilst I went downstairs and slugged a mouthful a chardonnay (which somehow seemed to have poured itself, in preparation of post-bedtime r&r). Felt awful afterwards (about the closeness to losing it, not about the chardonnay, obviously..)

Heavens. Longest thread for ages. Is it the end of the beginning?

Or perhaps I'm just losing it. Wipe me down with a cold pasty and call me Shirley. No, really.

whiffy, your post made me laugh (and god knows I could do with a laugh), especially the pelvic doors and deflated spacehopper..

don't know how all you 2nd or 3rd time mums cope and I really take my hat off to you: I can barely cope with this one!

Had a bad day today as littly just slept and wouldn't eat, so wondered if he was ill.. it's also hard now without DH who is back in Central Asia, even though his dad and dad's wife are being very supportive, I feel like a single mum! It's funny how you live from minute to minute with a small baby; you think 'oh, that was a good half hour, he seemed really happy!' and odd things like that.

right, time for the simpsons (my crazy luxury).

Will we ever do the following again?

1.Use shampoo AND conditioner (2 in 1 doesn't count)

1. read a book
2. go to a party or evening out (just imagine)
3. be able to talk on the phone and actually listen to the person at the other end
4. not lie in the dark trying to hear the baby breathing

right, this is all too depressing, time to sign off (and stop whinging, think how lucky I am etc etc)

Completely sympathise with the joys of having a toddler and a baby. My DD has got over being mean to me and wanting her daddy all the time, but she is still so demanding and I just can't give her as much attention as she would like. Had a bloody awful day today - started well with taking DD and LO to toddler group, but then he just wouldn't settle, hungry all the time...and she has just started saying 'pleeeeeease mummy...and she also does that apologising when I've been mean and grouchy to her' Feel like horrid mum.

LO seems more settled now though - after about 30mins of twisting in his cot and me and DH going up and down the stairs settling him he finally unleashed a massive explosion of wind followed by a big satisfied sigh and fell asleep. I am longing for the day when he isn't woken by his inability to burp and every time he farts.

Welcome to both newbies. Hope all going well for you both. We are very friendly here, although (me anyway) prone to whinging and moaning. Keep telling myself just how lucky I am to have two fantastic children.

Pelvicdoors (love the name) can sympathise with the masters - I signed myself up to do a three day teaching course in 2 weeks time and have loads to prepare...haven't even made a start. That is also why I am expressing - MIL (bless her) is coming to stay to look after the children as DH is away at a conference. Taking on a masters whilst on mat leave though - wow!

Fingers crossed that everyone has a quiet night!