November 2012 - The birthdays are coming thick and fast

[StuntedFrankenNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1884788-November-2012-Babies-going-trick-or-treating

chasing I missed first lots of things for both mine. Please don't let it get to you you are doing a great job x

Chasing Jonas is one of the oldest (if smallest!) on the thread and he's only stood independently twice for a matter of seconds a fortnight or so ago and has shown no interest in repeating the stunt - he's still very much pulling himself up and cruising rather than standing or walking independently anytime soon. My family has all walked late - my sisters two were both 16 months (though her daughter would have been 13 months adjusted), so I'm not expecting him to walk this side of Christmas.

I'm feeling quite pleased with myself. I find handling both girls together pretty hard, and going out with both of them on my own has been limited to essential trips, like the doctor or pharmacy or baker or whatever. Because DD1 was so awful when I tried it. Seems she has matured a little as today I took them to the park and then the supermarket early evening and they were brilliant. It was the first time lo had been in the trolley I think!

We're hardly standing here too and though nursery consider her hand holding walking to be walking I don't. I don't expect anything like that for weeks yet.

Oscar doesn't even cruise. He just crawls and that's it. I worry I don't develop him enough.

Due to sickness I missed 3 antidepressants this week and I think it is really starting to show. I am moody, irritable and very short tempered. Plus, I don't actually want O to come home tomorrow. I recognise this as the old me, the depressed me. I hate that I am so reliant on drugs. And a tiny bit worried to be honest.

Don't worry. Really don't. He will get there in his own good time there is no need to encourage or do anything really. If he's not doing it he is not ready, pure and simple. There's nothing you can do, if he is free space wise to crawl he is free to walk, or cruise, or however he does it.

I got so much BS when DD1 was 'late' walking (she wasn't, she walked at somewhere between 14 and 15 months) and then late talking (yep, she is late but not worryingly so) but you just have to bat your self doubt and others' off. If there was an issue it would have already been picked up on, and the fact he is crawling means everything is in place to walk.

He'll probably get up and walk when he sees something tempting just out of reach. Like dishwasher tablets or a set of knives, just to keep you on your toes.

Dispatches quiche fish to Chasing you are doing everything incredibly wonderfully. Whether they walk or talk or anything before others is nothing to do with the parenting, unless you leave him strapped in his pushchair in front of the TV 24/7. Yes XP,saw the first stand, but I BET you get the first 'I love you'.

Chasing, you are in good company. I have not even collected my meds from the Doctor and cannot get them until Monday as I was busy dealing with sickness and shit of all varieties. I too feel pretty crap without my drugs. Make sure you start taking them again and try to get into a routine to ensure you do not miss them again (hypocritical much)

And it was your sickness that prevented you, not you forgetting, sorry. Missed that bit (shoots self)

Can you call just friends guy and have some warm fuzzies?

I wish. I'm still waiting for him to text me back from my last text 48 hours ago I could do with nothing more than a great big hug from him right now but I'm not chasing him.

Thank you for all the birthday wishes. I've just come home from day 3 of my birthday celebrations, which involved lots of eating, friends and family a bit of hip hop karaoke and watching Wicked today with dh. Happy birthday to all the birthdays I've missed and hugs to those that need it. Chasing H doesn't stand independently. He cruises a slight slight bit across the bath but that's about it. He'll get there when he's ready.

chasing I know lady whose first baby didn't walk until almost 2. He was completely verbal and when encouraged to walk he would say "no. I don't want to" with a sort of bored voice. Then one day he just got up and walked. No toddling just walked. They do things in their own good time. I tell myself this when I worry that p isn't doing stuff like stacking cups or putting shapes in holes and so on. It all happens in the end.

And don't feel worried about needing your meds. You need meds because your brain isn't producing the right amount of chemicals so the meds do that job. No different to needing a cast for a broken leg. I hope that doesn't sound twee or simplistic but I really don't think you should beat yourself up. I imagine that once you are back on track with them after your illness you will feel much better about them.

GT every day you manage is another success. Like pp said you have shown real courage in even trying and to have got this far has shown proper determination.

I am speechless isles. What an astonishing display of wankerdome. Good job you had the pocket rocket to entertain you.

Sounds great pr. Slowly but surely things seem to be falling into place. At least with the girls.

det hope O is better soon.

evil he isn't being the perfect dad, he's treating you badly still. My DH would tuck me up in bed and look after the sick DC even if it made him ill too. That's it even especially nice but a standard response to one parent being ill. Don't settle for slightly nicer- it's still way short if what it should be.

pumpkin/flouncy nice to hear the joking in your posts.

VQ interesting about violence at age 2 DD is pretty good with S but when he pulls her hair and she appeals to me I have to remind her that she isn't always nice to him!

chasing I missed DD's first steps. Was working FT after 6 months, it was always likely. Don't beat yourself up. There will be other firsts you will get. And the firsts matter not at all compared with the day in day out care, love and attention you give O. Tru-fac.

So we've had an interesting day chez FamilyGazelle. While S was napping DD managed to bump her face on the bath as I showered. Top teeth through bottom lip. Massive wail and blood everywhere. Cuddles and it subsides a bit. Lip swells so fast. As I am usually negligent relaxed I rang NHS direct. They said go to A&E. So we did. In and out in 20 mins. I felt like such a munchausens by proxy mum. The staff were fab though. And DD bloody loves the hospital, so she thoroughly enjoyed it.

Then to my astonishment, S walked 4 steps this eve. Sorry if the timing of my news is crap chasing but actually I wanted to echo what PR and YW said - they go at their own pace. DD was just a day or 2 before 15 months before she walked. But she did other stuff way earlier than S has. S has been later than DD was with rolling, sitting, but earlier with some stuff. It's totally unpredictable and the variation of what is normal is huge. Plus it's another thing that seems all important now but in 15 years time when we are worrying about GCSE results, who walked when will be irrelevant.

Well we rather stupidly decided that our conservatory/pushchair&shoe dumping ground would be better as a conservatory/playroom, achievable by emptying cupboard under stairs of all the shit and putting into loft. Why is this stupid? Because we embarked on this project 20 mins before bath time, the day before S's little party, and we already have a million things to do in anticipation this evening. I am earning my tonight!

I'm actually fairly satisfied all round really. Even with the work situation believe it or not. The thing that drags me down is the non stop cleaning of the sodding muddy floor, but at least I have the time to do it during the week.

Happy birthday chick!

Nice day at crisp acres today. Lovely lie in courtesy of the mini one followed by a daunder into town for some shopping and lunch. She only slept half an hour this morning and had no afternoon nap so she was completely shattered tonight. So no idea if it was that or if she really is learning to self-settle but I popped her in her cot at 6:40, she lifted her head to watch me walk out and not a peep since! I really want it cracked for my birthday / DH's viva weekend in December. We will be leaving p with MIL and FIL and I think it's unfair to have her needing cuddled to sleep by MIL who is in her 70s with weak wrists.

My eyelid eczema has come back. Fuck sticks. My right eyelid is all cracked and sore. Poop

That was in answer to pass comment about things falling into place btw

I have and all the crap stuff has gone fuzzy good job i only bought a 1 glass sized bottle

Well earned then zamboni. And the lip crash sounds horrid.

Weirdly when I was working late the other night DH was putting p to bed. He said that she was bouncing about then suddenly gasped then started to wail. He could see nothing wrong but cuddled her in and she went to sleep. First thing I saw in the morning is she has essentially a black eye. She had a sharp cut next to a horrid black bruise. I reckon she must have stabbed her eye with her finger when bouncing. Looks horrid (you can actually see it on the poang pic I uploaded on FB) but doesn't seem to bother her at all.

And yy to 'slightly nicer' not being good enough evil. I am sorry if this sounds harsh but he really sounds damaging to everyone's well being.

pp thank heavens for bottle-sized glasses, eh!

Thanks for your comments, your right. I had to ask for N to be looked after. I'm so messed up arn't I? I'm just so confused and lost.

I never thought it would be so difficult, everyday I just want to run and keep running. But I know I can't, I feel chained, trapped. I've found out he's been lying about the money side too, hoarding it mainly

I need to make that appointment with the GP. The benefits check has been postponed for another week as the lady is ill. I don't think I can survive without them.

I'm off to work tomorrow, yes I'm snotty, and coughing. But it will take my mind off stuff.

I hope all the poorly babies are better, chasing, PR. det I hope your work is treating you ok. I'm sorry if I've missed anyone.
Evil

Evil, I now live solely on benefits but I never had an appointment to speak to anyone. I used entitledto.com (I think) to check what I was entitled to and then applied. Which benefits are you thinking of applying for?

I know your situation is different to mine as you work but the benefits I guess you are looking at are:

Child benefit (make sure this is in your name)

Tax Credits - Working and/or Child

Possibly Housing & Council Tax benefit, which you should be able to contact your council about directly.

And then I receive Income Support too.

If you break it down into each benefit you can check with each what you would be entitled to.

Thanks chasing for the website. People seem to think I'm a victim of domestic abuse, so there is a lady who wants to talk to me. I guess to see if I can get extra help.

Evil