December 2012 Babies Half a year already and still kind of sane.

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Oh stacks!

We did well here - T slept from her dream feed at 10.30 til 4.30. I didn't think there was much chance of resettling at that time and was worried that with the heat she might be thirsty so I fed her. She settled briefly but was up at 5.30.
Unfortunately dd2 seemed to be dreaming again and I had to go in 3 x around 12.30 to settle her.

I think I need to start ignoring his nighttime shouting. I can hear its mostly temper rather than distress, though I'm not sure he'll stop crying for anything except breast, so it may end up more like CIO/CC :(
I get do angry with him through the night though, he cant really be that hungry? I just want to set a reasonable timescale like feeding him once its past 2/3/4 hrs. Problem is I get embarrassed having the windows open and worry that everyone in the street can hear him crying and it'll disturb them all. We're in a row of terraced houses and at this time of year pretty much everyone will have their windows open.
There's also DH who has this sort of whining grunty sound he makes when he's tired, then he sits up and checks the time on his phone before throwing himself over in bed to turn his back to us. Makes me even more pissed off, but also more likely to feed T so I don't have to listen to DH all tomorrow morning/evening talk about how tired he is.

How old are your LOs IsThat and ISpy?

Sounds like a good night WL.

That must be really tough Stacks. I know exactly what you mean about thinking they can't possibly be hungry again. N is a bit like that - he gets to a point where he won't settle for anything but boob, which makes it tricky for me to go out for even the shortest time in the evening (despite him being perfectly happy to drink ebm from a cup in the day ). At the moment I'm just trying to ride it out, but it cannot carry on indefinitely.

N turned 6 months on 1st June so is one of the older babies on the thread. I think he is quite early in getting on the move- I'm sure I had a longer stretch with a baby who would stay put with DS1.

Stacks - tricky night! I hope you don't feel too bad today.

Real progress with nights here - dream feed at 10.15pm, feed at 6am, up at 7.15am. Longest stretch for about 3 months! Here's hoping it lasts.

Utopian - not sure I can help as the focus of our training has been self-settling. Prior, C always needed lots of help to fall asleep - rocking, swaddle, feed or dummy. She never fell asleep on her own in the cot. I think working on this skill ha helped with nighttime, as she can wake up and then settle herself without crying (and making me think she's hungry). I figure if she doesn't settle and calls for me she needs something else, which is probably food. After her amazing 7+ hour stretch she really cried out - it was clear she was super hungry!

utopian you can certainly start at bedtime and then if you feed in the night perhaps try not to let them suckle on for too long so they're not too deeply asleep when you out them down so can repeat the training. IMO dd2 and T were mostly using me as a human dummy for some time but it took me a while to realise it as whilst dummying they were still drinking some milk.

Thanks for the advice. We're just worried he's getting very focused on me, which doesn't help generally, and while I want him to be happy and feel secure it's better for him to be able to self settle and entertain to at least some extent..
Off to Bodrum later today! Excited about the holiday and the wedding of a friend while we're there, but hoping the flight is okay, what with the tooth as well!

Utopian, if it helps I didn't notice any increase in unhappiness or change in C's feeling of security while sleep training. If anything she has been a happier girl as she gets much more sleep than she used to. Case in point - morning nap is now approaching 2 hours. Unheard of. She wakes cooing and playing much more frequently - she used to wake after 40 minutes crying and grumbling.

Have a great holiday!

Ds won't stop bloody screaming and dd has picked her face until it's bled. I haven't hoovered for ages my house is actually disgusting because I never get the chance to clean it let alone tidy it

I've heard it suggested that at around 6 months babies get more hungry so wake lots for food in the night (and feed lots through the day) until weaning is established. Does this sound right to those of you with older babies? And everyone else with slightly younger babies too...

I'm trying to get T eating more foods, he just doesn't seem too interested though. He likes self feeding and chews away on carrot sticks, broccoli, green beans, bread, banana, tomato and now strawberry. However he doesn't really eat much of it, just gags and spits it out.
So we tried purée, but he was seriously unimpressed. Wouldn't open his mouth for the spoon, then spat out everything I put in while grimacing. We tried puréed carrot, and some organic Plum brand stuff - sweet potato and squash, and a strawberry and banana one. Both he just spat out :( I can't force him to eat, but really want him eating more. Anyone have any suggestions or had similar problems?

That's all a bit mememe. I just really want a bit more sleep. Last night was actually a good night for us, I'm just getting more frustrated and angry with it, and T, day and night :(

Glad you had a good night mama. I hate the idea of sleep training, but am desperate for the reward. It's good C seems happier now, I do wonder how much of T's 'bad' behaviour is down to being tired after poor sleep.

I'm very impressed at the moving round ISpy. I think I need to start leaving T to his own devices more. He's not frustrated at being unable to move because I'm carrying him around so much! I'm going to try and express some milk over the next few days and get DH to try feeding it to him. I bought him a sippy cup yesterday specially

WL I'm trying to restrict T's suckling. It works better at night than during the day. Even last night I got him to settle himself after feeding. However as we're bed sharing still he has me to snuggle up against. So I'm not sure it counts as self settling?

Enjoy the holiday and wedding utopian.

T's just woken from his morning nap, so I'm out of time for posting.

Stacks i know what your saying about DP but is there anyway you can make him sleep on the couch for abit. or you pretend to be asleep so he has to get up to see to T Or if your thinking about sleep traininh could you start it at the weekend so the worst few nights are while your husbands off. Then you won't have to deal with his huffing about tiredness.

Also i've found that distracting H at the end of 2 hours helped her go longer between feeds. Shes now upto between 4-5 hours between feeds. I did it really slowly and only to her daytime feeds and i still have to distract her alot of the time. I find getting on the floor with her and playing with toys helps alot, or throwing her in her pram and going for a walk.

Utopian, have a good holiday.

Spotty hope DS has stopped crying and don't worry to much about housework. Theres plenty of time for that when their older.

I don't worry about it but I actually can't even remember the last time I hoovered it's that bad. Plus three year olds make a lot of mess.

Ds still feeds two hourly in the day. If he misses a feed he makes up for it by only going an hour next time

I really feel for you stacks, you sound like you've had enough. I knew it was time for sleep training when I started to feel the irritation build up. IMO (this is in no way supposed to sound judgey) it is more damaging to a child to have an angry parent (understandable through exhaustion) than to have a loving parent who allows some controlled crying to facilitate self settling and a non-dead parent! As hales said, is there any way you and T can be apart from dp while you make a start? I found it really helpful to put Tabs and I in a different room while I got started so I didn't worry about anyone else. I also warned my neighbours!
Can you give yourself an hour in the bath to have a think about a plan?

stacks wr to food, have you tried just baby rice made runny with lots of bm so it's just a slight change in taste and texture, and then when he's ok with that add a bit more rice to slightly change the texture, then a small amount of veg etc?

spotty we could have a dirtiest house contest! I'd give you a good run for your money!

Stacks I get angry too and frequently mutter ffs ds be quiet WL makes sense actually. However dp had no cc crying at night because it's not fair on him or dd

The whole place needs a major deep clean but as I can't even keep up with day to day stuff I can't see it happening any time soon!

Ditto!

I can't remember who asked but DS was 6mo on 8th June. My 2 big dcs didn't crawl until 9 mo ish but ds2 is very determined.

Had a decent night except that as we started bedtime at 6.30pm by 5am he was wide awake!

T actually goes quite a long time without a feed during the day, particularly if we're out and I don't have to feed him to sleep.
He seems to associate feeding with sleeping, as when he's tired in the day he'll keep turning himself into me asking for breast. When he self settles at night too it's generally after turning into me with his nose against my side and sucking his lip to fall asleep. I'm trying to break the association during the day by walking him to sleep in his pram, but he has a tendency of waking up as soon as we stop so his 2hr afternoon nap is either me walking round non stop, or me sitting on the sofa watching tv while being a human dummy. The more tired I get the more often I end up on the sofa with him.

I'm going to try leaving him cry more on Friday night and over the weekend. I'm not sure if its too many changes at once to also get him in his cot? DH can stay in with us or sleep in the other room, it's his choice but won't stop him complaining how tired he is, how heavy DS is, how tired and sore his arms are from holding him etc etc.

Spotty, I say that under my breath to DS most night feeds, and a few times through the day.

Given T can go 4 hours without a feed during the day I'm going to try and get a break this weekend. DH has to learn to have solo responsibility for him at some point and can't always keep me at hand. Just an hour or two doing something I want to do, when I want to do it, without being shouted at would be bliss! Maybe I'll get my hair cut and a massage.

I'm thinking of getting a cleaner for a while to deal with the tip that is our house. I don't even have another DC to blame the mess on. It's mostly just me not putting things away after myself. As soon as T starts crawling I'm going to need clean floors. No idea how that'll happen just now.

Stacks I'm glad it's not just me it's just never ending the constant demanding of attention.

He's actually slept loads today. Two hours this morning and ninety minutes at lunch.

Operation three hours between feeds has begun.

Hello Ladies!
We've been away on holiday in France for two weeks. It was wonderful! We stayed at my Mum's and it was soooo nice to have an extra pair of hands to help with DS!

I'm sorry I have no hope of reading back over the tread to see what I've missed but I hope you're all well.
DS is 5.5 months and working hard on doing a bit of crawling... I'm sure he'll be on the move pretty quick. On holiday he figured out rolling over tummy to back. So now he can travel by rolling ... He loves a bit of mischief!

I'm also here to beg for your help! I see sleep training and self- settling being discussed which is exactly the help I need!
Stacks I totally feel your pain! I am worn out! DS's longest sleep is about 3-4 hours and after that its pretty much 2 hourly wake ups.
Although since we've got home I notice that he is falling asleep at night on the boob - how do I change this?
His bedtime routine is around 7pm we change him ready for bed, take him into the bedroom and feed and cuddle. Then I used to put him into his bed and get him to sleep with a combo of singing, shushing and then leaving him to it and going back to him if he started to whine and I would shush him a bit more.

This week it seems to run - feed a little bit, fall asleep, mummy tickling his back and swapping sides to keep him awake. Give up on feed, put in bed asleep, wake up about ten minutes later and then needs the usual singing etc to get to sleep. Then first feed is between 11pm and 1 am I'm worn out! I don't think I've slept longer than two hours solidly for a while...

He used to sleep until around 3-4 am but that disappeared some time ago...

DP is willing to help because he knows I'm tired. My mum's solution is always "give him some baby rice" but at most of his night feeds the last couple of nights he just seems to want boob to go back to sleep... I'm fairly certain he is waking for comfort more than hunger.
Strategies please! And if people don't mind, I'd be happy to have your tips via pm.
X

Okey dokey, will pm you nutella

Stacks - it would be great if you could get a bit of a break this weekend. Even a couple of hours to treat yourself to something nice will make such a difference. You're right, DH will need to cope on his own; it's simply not fair for you to bear the burden all the time.

I think I could join in with the messy house contest It's so hard, with DS1 leaving a trail of mess in his wake so just keeping it at a level that is safe for N is a battle in itself, never mind any other cleaning. The problem is I just cannot leave N for a second now. He'll do 5 mins max in his chair before complaining, and the majority of his naps are still in my arms or while we are out and about.

DM has offered to come round for a couple of hours in the morning to occupy the boys while I try and make a bit of headway with it. It's really kind of her, and I know she loves being with them, but for some reason I just feel a bit like I'm taking advantage and that I should be able to sort my own house out (literally!)

Meeting with work went well - it still needs to be approved by the other partners, but it's looking like I'll be able to spread my hours over three days so I'll be able to take DS1 to and from pre-school. Really pleased about it, but also bit scary thinking about going back to work and N settling in at nursery.

I'm trying to get ds to sleep and out numpty next door neighbour is mowing the bloody public bits of grass (you know the bits by the path that the council do) he's obsessed! That and washing his car which they do every week....

Stacks, I agree completely with ISpy - your DH needs some time on his own with your little one, and you need some time on your own! Any chance of getting a cleaner? It's a godsend in our house, and rescues my sanity. I get driven mad by my hair which is STILL falling out by the handful and is all over the house. I am unutterably happy when someone comes every week to get rid of it.

ISpy - accept your mum's offer! Don't cut off your nose to spite your face.

Nutella - 2 week French holiday sounds great! I will also PM you about sleep stuff.

Speaking of sleep, baby C napped almost 2 hour this morning, then an hour at lunch - and nothing since then. We went for a long walk to see if it would help but she just chatted and sucked on things. I guess she didn't need it? She hasn't been grumpy.