November 2011 - early birds, just in time and late to the party, all welcome!!

[TwoJackRussellsandapumpkin]

Hi all,

just starting up a post natal thread for all the due in November peeps on the antenatal forum and anyone else who would like to join in too, hoping to see my arrival by the end of the week, so officially an early bird I hope :)

Well I'll have to mark my place though probably a good 4 weeks away from joining you here. I wouldn't want to miss all the tips from the new November mum's (in October).

marking place, although hoping this isn't going to tempt fate. Bubs has to stay in situ until after ds's op. fx fx fx

Marking my place, but still have a while to go yet :)

ditto!!! See you all here soon! x

Marking my place too!

Well, I'll start the PN waffle then.

DD2 - so far so good. She's gained weight and has another weigh in today. Nighttimes are not too bad. DD1 gives me more bother actually.

So yes, exhausted but can't really blame the newborn.

See - just waffle!

Having our bambino this thurs by planned cs so a November mummy (1st timer!)

Hey Kelly,

Good to hear that DD2 is gaining weight, I think J is to be weighed tomorrow, so will see whether he is getting bigger or not, I hope so, would make me feel happier about not managing to breastfeed.

Hi to everyone else, old and new :)

Boink!

Hey folks,

i'm just about beginning to venture back online in wee guy's nap times. He seems to have day and night reversed entirely. have to wake him to feed during day and going every 2 hours at night time, then to hourly at one point. got a boost in that HV weighed him yesterday and he has put on weight he lost and a little bit more too. Makes it worthwhile.

i'm struggling to leave the house, anyone else? I got out today for a walk, bob round supermarket for nothing in particular and a juice at local cafe and that felt like a feat. I still haven't driven with him in the car yet- i'm too scared. Not sure what's happening to me!

hope you are all doing well, x

Hey Folic,

good to hear from you, J is not too bad with the sleeping but am having to express for him, so plenty of time to surf the net whilst doing that!! Good to hear that your boy has put his weight on and then some :)

I've been trying to get out the house to go for a walk once a day, had a section so not getting behind the wheel for some time I'm afraid, am going to go mad with boredom I think!!

How are you getting on Cali?

We're doing so much better, just some reflux and bloated tummy ache now - but that's signs of a fed baby!

Apart from her 4am feed she sleeps through - such a difference to 8 hour screaming stints! We're still co-sleeping though - DP and I find she settles so much better in our bed... And we settle better, too.

Hello, we're home so just checking in. Only on day 3 but feeding is ramping up. Just trying to drink in every gorgeous minute as this is my last baby...

Eddie finally came home from the hospital last weekend after 13 very long days and nights on the special care baby unit. He just wouldn't feed properly at all, just too tired, and lost a whole pound, putting him down to 5lb at his lowest, so needed a lot of his feeds down a nose tube to build his strength up. After being home for a week, he's doing a lot better, and the HV has weighed him today, and he's now 6lb1, so back past his birth weight at last

Re: going out and about, I'm struggling a bit as well, having had a section I can't drive either, but I do live walking distance fro town, so ought to manage. I just find it really hard to get up and ready in the morning. Eddie only goes 2 or 3 hours between feeds, so I'm not getting a lot of sleep, and I'm dreading my husband going back to work on Monday, and leaving me on my own to handle all the visitors. Anyone else feel like they have something to prove to visitors? I can't help thinking everyone is looking at me to see how I'm coping with the difficult birth/ early arrival. Probably all in my head, but I feel a bit judged for moving on to formula already as well. I was expressing because Eddie couldn't manage to suck hard enough for breast feeding, but that soon became too much once we were home, there just aren't enough hours in a day to be plugged into the milking machine. Also, my boobs are killing me. Badly. Hope the milk dries up soon

Sorry for the stream of consciousness post, anyone else just feel to tired to do anything? I love Eddie to bits, but it does sometimes feel like motherhood is a bit too much. Probably just hormones, because I don't always feel like this, and I absolutely love my cuddles.

Lizzy We spent 4 days in NICU with Abi - she lost 1lb too, and midwives kept saying I was doing fine with my bf - obviously not!
Don't feel guilty about bottles - I was surprised at how many of my friends admitted to not coping with bf after I failed. You have to do what is right for you and Eddie - if that's formula, that's that.
I was lucky that Abi came back to bf for comfort - but I'm never going to stop formula feeding to reassure myself that she's getting what she needs!

Oh well, the steriliser just finished for her mid-night bottle!

Lizzy,

I'm mixed feeding too. although totally agree with your comment re not enough hours, feeling miserable sat in front of the tv with the pump whilst DH and J are asleep upstairs :( I thought my family would really judge me but they have been really supportive and if my friends say anything then they can't be too great as friends, that's the theory anyway...

Cali glad to hear things are looking up for you and Abi :)

Oh Lizzy you are describing my experiences with DS so closely so I am in a position to tell you with absolute certainty that it'll get easier soon. But for now absolutely do not underestimate the trauma you have been through with difficult birth & time in NICU etc - I am sure you will realise in a few months that you spent the first few weeks basically in shock. Please lower your expectations of yourself, you are doing a fab job. In the 1st few weeks the only thing that matters really is that you & Eddie both get fed & both get some rest - I barely left the house for the 1st 2-3 weeks I was home with DS (prob until he was 6 weeks old) - I wasn't depressed it just wasn't a priority for me (I'm not someone who gets cabin fever at all, I'm quite happy just to potter around my house) - if I got dressed it was an achievement! I fed my boy when he needed feeding (a mix of formula & breast milk but looking back I should have stopped expressing sooner) and tried to nap when he did. I had visitors but focussed on the ones who I didn't need to impress (saved those for the weekends when DH was around). I found motherhood a big adjustment so it took me a while to find my groove ;-)

All that said, I am happy that I didn't have PND I was just adjusting & getting to know my firstborn at my own pace. If you suspect you might have PND then speak with MW / HV etc as there is some great help you can get. CI'm not suggesting I think you do from your post, just we should all look out for signs if you see what I mean as it is quite common.

Use the weekend to really rest up - let DH take over during the day & sleep, sleep, sleep

Cali glad to here you're getting on really well now

Thanks everyone, I think I am just adjusting as Ali says. I don't think I have post natal depression, I feel a lot better after a sleep. Eddie is up to 3 hourly feeds now, which feels a lot more manageable than the 2 hours he has been on all week. Is anyone sending any thankyou gifts to the hospital where they gave birth? I was thinking of sending a magazine subscription for the expressing room on the neonatal unit, because all their magazines are really out of date. I want to do something nice for the nurses as well, but I don't really know what, there were so many who looked after Eddie. I'm going to take the weekend to chill, and not bother getting dressed today, and I'll see how I'm doing when Monday comes around. I think I'm probably imagining the judging about not breast feeding, its just so forced as the best for baby, that its hard to remember that it really isn't best for MY baby. I think I'll feel better when the boobs hurt less, I heard Sudafed helps dry it up, anyone heard any other old wives tales or used any methods in the past?

I'm just checking in for the post natal thread! I was an early arrival too, end of October.

Lizzy the only tip I have been given, by several midwives and by a more experienced older sister, for making the boobs hurt less is cabbage leaves in your bra. No idea how it works, but apparently it does......Mine haven't been too bad this time, a bit achey but nothing major, but I do remember them being rock hard and agony after DD was born and I gave up bf her.

I feel I am doing well, I'm not weepy or anything, don't think I am showing signs of PND or anything, but I do have a wee sad feeling deep down, and I think its because this is my second child and I know I won't have another (combination of two difficult pregnancies, two really difficult births, and the fact that DH is adamant that he doesn't want more. Hell, to start with he didn't want either of the ones we have, although he is besotted with them now!) so every monent that he is this tiny just seems so precious, because I know I won't have them again. But its stupid to think like this, because focussing on that just takes the joy out of everything....

Evening all,

Snoozle, I too was feeling sad about not being pregnant anymore, which is daft cos it was a bit of an effort by the end, but I wonder whether it's the hormones?

The midwife came round this morning and found me in tears over J's poo explosion that he had just had, so she is coming out again next week rather than signing me off to the health visitor - I doubt I have pnd but I am so tired, it's been hard not to burst into tears all day over really stupid things, but had family visiting so am hoping when it's just our little family again I'll feel better about things.

DH has been lovely and has made dinner and is going to take the feeds tonight so that I can sleep so lets hope I feel more like myself tomorrow :)

I'll be controversial and say I don't miss being pregnant. I love having my body back, love fitting into jeans and the swollen, painful limbs being back to normal.

I'm also loving having my Sprout with me, instead of inside me.

Cali I don't think that is controversial at all, and I will shamelessly admit that I was delighted to pour a decent sized glass of wine on my first night home from hospital and enjoy every mouthful, thinking to myself 'my body is my own again'! Because, as TwoJack was saying, it definitely was a struggle in the end. I really don't understand why I'm having these feelings, as I really am enjoying my son's company a lot more on the outside than when he was in there, but yet I feel wistful.....as TwoJack said, must be the hormones....

I don't miss being pregnant either - I haven't enjoyed any of my pregnancies really, more seen them as a means to a rather fantastic end

I am loving having a newborn again (though less so between 11pm & 3am when he won't settle!) but still feeling worried about how I'm going to cope with 3 LOs... But then scar still achy so still hard to imagine being back to normal! BF is going better - right side fine, left side a struggle just don't seem to be able to get him to latch on without it hurting especially in the middle of the night.

Evening all, Ali have you tried nipple shields? I could be talking rubbish as J didn't once show any interest in latching on at all and therefore am expressing and topping up with formula, but thought I would mention it to see if that might help, my twopenniesworth if you like :o

I am so pleased, went to the doctor yesterday and she has agreed that I can get back to driving, so no more stuck in the house :) Although I have a horrible overhanging belly so can't walk too fast anywhere as it starts to wobble and feels really really horrible, but still can get out of the village if and when i want to without relying on anyone else :o

Alicat have you tried 'conning' DS into thinking the left side is the right? If you normally hold DS in the cradle hold then if you put them in rugby ball they think they're on the other nipple? I've heard great things about nipple shields for premmies, and I think they're more accepted for other babies too now - they're made of a much lighter material than they used to. They do risk slightly reducing your supply temporarily because baby has less contact with you, but they can help as a training aid, and then once it's all plain sailing you can ditch them. But babies tend to get so much better at latching and things once they have a few weeks grace from the trauma (and head ache) of being born, and such things like jaundice which really interfere with feeding cues. Very jealous of those on wine. I had a glass way back when when I was just pumping milk, now I'm back to being teetotal again. I don't think I've been nicely drunk since 2008. Sigh.
We're going great guns here, I only have to medicate Willow twice a day now, down from 10, and we were allowed to ditch the formula top ups so its just me and her! Of course I have slightly mixed feelings about that come 1 and 4am... and particularly when she's still up at 5am and I know Jacob will be up by 7... but hey ho. Wish us luck for her big weight in tomorrow. I'm hoping she's still sticking to her line somewhere between the 2nd and 9th centile!

Marking my place!