July 2010: the "a ffffew more birthdays, a ffffew more walking but are they all sleeping? Are they ffffeck!" one

[CakeandRoses]

tsc thinking of you both, hope F gets his lungs back. He looks happy enough in the pics, I suppose they don't know what's going on. Fingers crossed for you! Glad you had a lovely night out!

mlic you're 'allowed' as many cs as you want/need but they recommend a check after 3 to see what the scar/damage is and sometimes they reckon you shouldn't have any more. Plenty of women do have more but if I'm told to stop, I'll probably take their advice :)

dylthan that's so sad, I'm so sorry that the choice has been taken from you. Don't ever feel bad about writing about how you feel, even if every post is about you it doesn't matter, that's what we're here for (see below).

I've spent all day feeling well and truly pg and wondering why the frick I wanted to do this again. Rough as a badger's arse, haven't thrown up but feel permanently sick like I'm about to. When I stand up I get dizzy and have to lie down again, spent 5 mins lying on the bathroom floor this morning almost fainting It's going to be so.much.fun when DH is away on this course and I've got to actually do something with the children. Off to bed now to try and be ok for tomorrow.

man, i'm whacked. all went really well today, better than i hoped. A was in her element. i didn't get a chance to take many pics but i'll chuck a link to my july album on fb if you fancy a look.

tsc thinking of you guys and keeping everything crossed that your poor little boy makes it to the church in the morning (which sounds a bit wrong)

trudy sounds like a great party and nice one for putting that women in her place. pic of cake needed please

chul that you feel crappy. it'll soon be a memory hopefully. i hated the ms period and yet i can barely remember feeling like it now F & A are here.

memph are you and your maffis- spot-- gonna go to the docs again?

trudyla I second wanting to see pics of the cake! I would have been angry about the cake woman, I remember when L was about 5 months old sil tried feeding him jam on toast, I wasnt there but my mum leapt into action saying no memphis wouldnt allow it, she said yes but hes staring at me and it has no bits in the jam some people are weird, everyone now knows to ask me first, as he came out in a rash early on with dairy as far as most are told he is allergic dh's family and thats why they cant feed him chocolate behind my back! saves people thinking its PFB syndrome, my family just know I would pull their heads off if they feed him rubbish!
cakes will see how I am Monday and they go docs if im still ill, DH has been like a child all night as its getting to him that im ill and not myself, I told him he should have had time off work but the reason I didnt tell hiim is he would have took L out all day having a nice jolly when he should be off looking after L, house and me, he doesnt get it. I was resting earlier and he was in kitchen cleaning, L was emptying cupboards, dog was causing mayhem, dh was freaking out, I told him I have to deal with that everyday, I swear he thinks I just go for nice walks and watch Jeremy Kyle

Hope F is better today tsc. And you have mil arriving too . Or is she already here?

dylthan that's so odd in a really nasty way...why on earth would she say that?! Sounds like a right piece of work. Hope you have a lovely day regardless of gf turning up.

cake glad everything went well!

Back later, DH is in a strop and needs to be rescued

dylth that's incredible , you poor D I'm assuming it's more in character for her to be an utter bitch than for your cousin to make things up. She must have maffis issues - normal people would never do something so disgusting.

if i were you i'd look forward to her coming today to rip her head off if she steps a cm out of line.

chul what's up with dh?

and Happpy Birthday B! Hope you all have a great day!

Happy birthday B!

Im off to my mums today and DH is hopefully taking D to his dads so I can sort through the wedding photos and get a book together with the nicest ones.

Does anyone else DH/Ps look at things like Nuts? Im having to use DHs laptop as my power lead has broken and went to type 'mumsnet' but put NU by mistake and it came up with all the listings he'd been on on Nuts website, Ive nosily had a look and some are the usual things like Megan Fox in the bath which is laughable so not worried about that but theres other things like pics and vids of actual real girls (or so it says) and its actually made me feel a bit sick. I dont know if Im overreacting, he was next to me on the sofa when I saw it and when I asked him why he just kind of laughed and said 'i dont know'

We were up at 5am, S has been whinging all day, DH has to go back to work tomorrow and he's prepping for this course...what's not up with DH?
I'm going to shove all 3 children in the car and go to a fish farm I think, at least today I can stand up without falling over so might as well make the most of it!

dh my DH doesn't look at that stuff, call me un-mumsnetty or whatever but I'd consider it a betrayal like I'm not good enough for him or something. I really wouldn't stand for it but thankfully DH isn't interested. Just my opinion though!

Dh my dh doesn't but I'd be about 99% sure he did when he was your dh's age. Not sure if that knowledge is any use to you!

Though I don't think you're overreacting, I wouldn't be massively happy about my dh looking at stuff like that - once you're married with kids it's not really on (I think).

dh When I first met DH I saw he had looked at stuff like thid but now we have been together a while and got L I would flip a lid, real girls is porn and I dont get why DH would want to see anything like that when he has me, if he wanted to watch porn he could but he wouldnt be with me, I agree with chulita, I consider it a betrayal.
dylthan she sounds like a bitch!

ffI'll post some cake and party pics as soon as I have them on the laptop. fI'm rubbish at taking photos but I think DP took a few.

The woman was a neighbour who can be quite overbearing, so I suppose it was best that I stood up ffor myself. I just don't like confrontation much and I hate it when people sulk. Oh well, I'm just not gonna acknowledge it and hopefully she'll geft over it.

I don't know either what it is with old people feeding oru babies crap. I don't force them to eat an apple when they are having biscuits.

tsc How is it goingf? Thinking of you all.

dylthan Happy Birthday B. Don't be sad. Try and enjoy the day. Hopefully bf will behave. I agree, it's probably best to be extra nice to her, even though it might be hard.

chulita I'm glad you're feeling a bit better today. I'm sure you've tried it all, but those accupressure travel sickness bands helped me as well as ginger tea with lemon and honey.

cake Glad the beer party went well. Are the other kids gone now? How did it go? Finally someone who says they are not great with guests either. I'm a bit like that. I get nervous about the mess and I worry constantly whether everybody is having a nice time.

fHad a very chilled morning. M just took present after present and played with it for a bit while we chilled with coffee and bacon butties. Unusual and awesome!

fIt's still raining like crazy here so can't do much other than go to a caf later.

Enjoy your Sundays.

dythlan happy birthday M. Bf is a complete bitch I wouldn't want her in my house.

dh dp has had some stupid things on his phone sent from work colleagues which the immature idiots think are funny rather than sexy iyswim. Ask him about it. I would probably be more annoyed he wasn't open about it.

tsc how's F? Thinking of you.

memphis think a trip back to the docs is needed for you. Did the in-laws descend for a visit?

chulita you just reminded me how much I hate early pg, if I could skip that and have the babies I would. How's the house?

cakes pics are fab. How were the house guests?

trudy good on you standing up to her. Everyone checks with me before giving R things. Unfortunately R loves all food. And tends to chase people for things

Had a lovely night with dp. Now he is doing housework, love that man

dylth i had tears in my eyes reading about bf hitting her dd. she sounds like a fucking horrific piece of work. tbh, i wouldn't be able to tolerate having someone like that in my life and around my children so would happily speak my mind because the only drama she'd get from it is me closing the door in her face. i get that's it's not easy when you want a relationship with dbro and dn but you shouldn't have to put up with you and your children being treated like that.

we barely have a relationship with dh's older sister and her family now as she's riddled with issues which i'm not at all interested in being involved in. she's learnt that she'll get no reward for behaving like a dick to us so has finally stopped, sadly (for my dh and her children) that's meant she's pretty much stopped contacting or seeing us as she has very little range outside of being a dick.

dh i agree with wss, it might be an age thing with your dh. I wouldn't be at all surprised if my dh looked at things like that when he was younger but i'm pretty certain he doesn't now. I wouldn't tolerate it and i don't think it's something he'd want to do anyway as that would make him a different person with different values to who i think he is.

Also, I feel even more uneasy about the objectification of women now i have a dd - i want her to grow up in a world where men aren't thinking about her like she's a brainless 'tits on legs' plaything.

mlic your dh needs to do more to help round the house if he feels embarrassed about it tbh! weren't you annoyed about him saying that?

trudy really pleased to hear how happy M is . birthdays obv suit her!

it's one of my worst traits the way i get anxious about guest and mess and also like you, i worry tons about whether everyone is ok and enjoying themselves. i actually love having people over for dinner but would much rather they go home at the end of the night -and take their mess and weird habits with them--.

but no, the visit did not go well dh's sister (who is not the one i mentioned above) behaved despicably to her lovely step-dds - it explained a lot as to why she wanted to dump them here in the first place. she had a row with her dp (who is lovely and a great father) in the restaurant about her jealousy of s-dd1 'taking over' and 'acting like her ds's mother' . they eventually ended up going outside the restaurant to row whilst the girls cried their eyes out with my MIL trying to console them.

in the end, her dp insisted his girls went back to the hotel with them for the night, completely understandable as they were distraught and he didn't want to leave them. it was ironic that for all my moaning about them staying, i actually really wanted them to come back with us that night as i didn't want them near my SIL or having to have an uncomfortable night trying to squeeze into one room.

just awful and yet another visit from dh's family where we're left feeling utterly shell-shocked on the sunday.

have no idea how my solid-as-a-rock dh ended up so issue-free coming from such a fucked-up family.

sorry for the waffle - have written that post in about 5 chunks over the morning!

tsc really hope F is ok

cakes your sil sounds as bad as dythlans, she shouldn't be with a man who. Has kid. Being a step parent isn't easy but all the kids have to be treated equally. Hope she didn't ruin your evening though. Is her ds the girls brother?

and this is the 'nice' SIL memph

yes, her and dp have a ds the same age as my A. SIL's got loads of insecurities and is jealous of her s-dds and their mother and yet they really are two of the nicest, politest girls i've ever met and are amazing with their baby brother. show no jealousy towards him and are really helpful. just before it all kicked off, i actually said i could do with a s-dd1 around myself!

it didn;t spoil the evening but only because it happened at the end of it.

thank you stac pleased you had a great night and are having a break from the housework

and yy, i know it's not easy having step-children and i agree you shouldn't be in the relationship if you can't behave well towards any children involved.

stac we're not living at the house, back in our work house now. We still need to paint a couple of rooms/stick some loose tiles on/cement a huge hole in the utility room so I'll most likely go up next week with the dc while DH is away. My parents can keep me company so I'm not lonely! We don't want to let it out now we've stayed in it though, proper fallen in love with it and its 18 inch thick walls.

cake what a horrible end to the night. Strangely enough I was watching 'Ever After' last night...being horrible to step-children is sadly not a new thing (not that think Cinderella is historical btw).

I've done loads today with wandering around etc, we'll have to see if I'm bed-bound tomorrow. With L I used to have a good 'active' day then at least one 'feeling like crap and stuck in bed' day, hopefully this won't be the same, I don't have the luxury of staying in bed all day like I did then!

thanks for the replies ladies, i think you're right its an age thing but it still gets to me and if he's going to carry on doing it rather than it being a one off 'nosy' than i will certainly put a stop to it. I agree it makes me feel like he's looking at girls who are 'better' than me, even tho i think they're degrading themselves massively for taking part. Ill admit that DH and i usedto watch porn togetjer before D was around but that's different because we both agreed to it and we were both involved.

Dylthan that sounds horrible what she's like around D, id hate that too she sounds like a really nasty person.

sounds like tsc managed to get F out of hospital in time this morning!

chulita, hope you haven't overdone it and that you'll be OK tomorrow.

Cake, your photos of A's party are great! Looks like you all had a brilliant time.

So our party is over too. The baptism went well this morning, and then we've had a lovely picnic in the park with all our family and friends. It's the first time since J's birth that both our families have got together. We made just the right amount of food. The sun shone, J got lots of lovely presents, ate lots of cake and generally a lovely time was had by all. I didn't get a chance to take many photos but hopefully other people will have some nice ones.

So, back to work in the morning after 13 months off! A whole new era begins.