December 2008: because i unwittingly finished the old thread

[waitinggirl]

oops. sorry. didn't realise i was post 1000. hope people find this...

Hello ladies,

Loving all the Christmas chat. I'm on my phone at the mo but when I get home tonight I will dig out my gingerbread house recipe and see if I can upload a photo of last year's house onto my profile.

I wanted to ask how those of you with DC's whose birthdays are not long before Christmas plan the overlap. DD2's birthday is 18 Dec. I had thought I would always delay Christmas decos until the 19th so the excitement of Christmas doesn't swamp her bday. But is that needlessly mean on the excitement of Christmas?

SL - sorry you are down. Having two very little ones IS hard. And this time of year IS hard. So it's not surprising you feel like it's all an effort. Can you plan v structured days so that you always get out and see at least one other adult. And if yr MiL is coming to stay why not use her as a free babysitter and get out with your DH? A bit of adult time might help you see eye to eye.

Jolly - I can imagine you are anxious about your kidneys. I know you have a complicated medical history but if it's any comfort my kidneys don't cope well with pregnancy and the doctors said it was relatively common. In my first pregnancy I had protein in my urine from 25 weeks and it eventually turned into mild pre-eclampsia. In my second pregnancy I had protein from 12 weeks but I never got other symptoms. It made me feel a bit rubbish but the good news is they went back to full function straight after birth. Good luck with the tests.

PD - your fainting episode sounds frightening. Was it to do with the sight if the needle or the pressure change as they took the blood? I once fainted after giving blood but was fine the next time. I am really annoyed I can never give blood again as I had transfusions after DD1's birth.

Lady - brilliant news on the moving date. I am v excited for you.

Rubes - no more bullets please. They aren't half as fun to read. I hope your DS feels better today. And good on him for understanding abt being quiet when yr DD is asleep. Clever boy.

I hope your hangover lifts Urbane. It sounds like you need to pick up a large bacon sarnie and strong coffee at your work canteen. Drop me a work email soon, I'd love to meet for a coffee.

For Christmas recipies, we often use the Jamie Oliver ones. His gravy is outstanding and he does a great stuffing.

SL I feel your pain Winter sucks. I find the best thing to do is just to get out. As long as everyone is well wrapped up a good tramp round the fields or a play in the park does wonders. Or you could always just take to the vodka. It also works a treat.

DS2 is poorly and quite miserable after a full 6nights of 7.30 -6.30 with no night wakings. Which as you all know is a miracle he woke last night. I heard him cry then he seemed to self settle then an hr later he wandered into us wide awake. He eventually settled at 5.15 then DH alarm went off at 5.45 [tired]

Loads I want to chat about but have not even got in the shower yet so wil be back later.

Oh and AVO DS2 is 17th Dec. We are having a small family party for him the weekend before his birthday. Not sure what will happen re decs this yr last yr we put them up before his bday but the traditional rules are 12days before then 12 days after so I think that lands on the 13th? So may do it then.

Right shower.

Oh dear Urbs. That's no good, was it worth it, did you have a good time.

PD I meant to say, I'm not sure why it happened, but its quite common. My mum & brother can't give blood because they both pass out either while it being taken or shortly after. I think its up to you if you want to give blood, you just need to maybe lay on the bed thing for a little longer after the blood is taken, and well put up with the possibility of fainting. Generally I'd advise against it.

So tired, DS2 slept ok but I went to bed too late, and I've got the beginnings of a cold. However, it is surprisingly sunny here and I took the boys for a walk in the forest yesterday and it was so nice and really brightened me up so we might go again today.

Oh and Avo my birthday is the 7th and we traditionally put our tree up on the 1st. I never felt it took away from my birthday. We will still put everything up on the 1st and are having dinner at the Pirate family restaurant.

Oh SL - I so feel your pain. You poor poor love. There is no more lonely feeling than when you can't communicate with DH regarding nippers and you just feel so tired. My DH actually heard me talking to myself a couple of days ago, saying "I just wish I wasn't so tired all the time". It is so very very dull. And wearing. I love my littles, and I do think they're relatively easy, but I find myself absolutely knackered constantly. And when I reprimanded DD1 the other day, DH had the audacity (good word - I've been trying to remember it for days!) to question my parenting. Hmmm. Not on.

I second the suggestion of using your MIL as a babysitter. Great for you and DH to get out and also for you to avoid her for a while.

Does your DS go to nursery at all? So you get a bit of time out? My DD1 goes twice a week, and I must say, it is a total treat. I get the whole day with DD2 and lots of time off because she has 3 sleeps a day! And I do very little on these days. Apart from some nice long afternoon walks. Although today am meeting up with some friends for lunch. Nice. I even have make up on. Oh yes.

DH has gone to Ireland with work for a couple of days. Will miss him. In spooky haunted house. WOOOO! Heating and hot water back on - whoop whoop!

Any tips on when to put littles into their own beds? I'm thinking it might be time for DD1 to go into a bed, but am nervous of it because she's so crap at going to sleep at night and because our single bed is quite high off the ground, so if she gets out, she won't be able to get back in unless I put her in it!!

x

I haven't got time to post as I would like at the moment, DP is off today and we are off to the house again. I hope to post later or tomorrow, but I did want to say to SL, huge huge sympathy. DD1 doesn't physically hurt DD2 and is quite sweet with her but acts up terribly with jealousy and is very attention seeking at the mo. DD2 was goign every three hours or so between feeds but she slipped back to every two or two and a half last night and it's hard. I just feel constantly harassed and like I have no time. Part of that is because we are busy with the house but this chasing my tail makes me feel stressed. Anyway, you didn't want to hear my woes but I am so with you about it being hard. Even though I love them to pieces. As to your DH...what aspects of parenting does he not agree with you over? Is it the treatment of DS? I know rowing is stressful but stick to your guns I say. Is there any way you could have a calm chat with him about it all? It's no use thrashing these disagreements out during a row as both sides will become more intransigent. But whilst your MIL is here, at least try to get out, just the two of you. And ignore her barbed remarks. I do feel your pain though.

Sybs, I hope you are feeling more chipper today, darling.

Rubes, are DS's eyes better? Loads more to say but have to dash now, apologies.

Vag-jojo, when would you be passing through Oxford? Assuming we are in the house you would all be hugely welcome for coffee/lunch/whatever you like.

Poison I meant to add, I know all about the Vasovagal thing - get it quite regularly remember - it's just what happens when you are going to faint. Were you lying down for it? If not, it might not happen if you lay down beforehand. Sometimes you can avoid it by having a sports drink like lucozade right before going in. Depends what brought it on though. is it a phobia type thing or had you just not eaten etc?

Beans ds went in a bed at 17 months but there is no way I could've put him in one he can't get back into as he gets out routinely every night for his protest ritual then shuts his door and goes back in. he'a in a very low 2'6 single and seems to love it.
Glad you have heat and water again.

Sybs are you ok?

Jam I did chuckle when you said "I haven't even made it to the shower yet" at 9am! That's normal round here if I don't have to be out the door! (but perhaps you have to be out the door?)

Urbs hows the head. Hair of the dog I say, works a treat.

You know interestingly you all say you don't like my bullet points, however you all reply to my posts more when I don't ramble!

DS still mucky eyed and tired. Up at 530 this morning due to a totally overflowing wet nappy, and no he didn't knock
he's knackered so will be napping shortly. Won't eat much, just generally miserable.

Summer hope you are feeling better - damn this weather. Oh and that wasn't rambling by any stretch!

Right, Tablecloths (sorry still on the table linen here) Would a berry red table cloth be weird under a chocolate table runner? Or ditch the runner and get the led one

crossed with you lady - hope you have a productive day. Wish we couldve done more up there to help, but dh has been FLAT OUT its crazy around here. We'd have helped you move boxes too but that weekend is ds's birthday so having a bit of a family do.
Yeah ds still not too well, and nose running too now as is mine, but will keep you posted about Thursday.

I think that would look quite nice, Rubes. However, get the LED one anyway.

Lady we are hoping to visit some friends in Oxford while er are over, not sure of dates though so will get back to you. If you want we could dip into any little bits you need done on the house. DH loves manual labour, I think he feels he is a DIY legend in an IT geeks body. Also what is that website that estimates what a property is worth.

Well finally the owner has gotten back to us with a price which is 5k less than her asking. Our agent seems quite happy about this, and is increasing our offer to 6k more than our starting offer. It seems that because she said that much less, she eventually may be willing to go fairly low. So he is going to say our final offer (when he eventually gets to it after a bit of tooing and froing) is about 5k less than our original max offer is...if that makes sense. Basically it seems by her counter offer that she may be getting quite desperate to sell.

I had a giggle about Jams shower too. I dont actually shower anymore I just jump in the bath before the boys do. I've trained them to enjoy hot baths.

SL I must say, I'm a little concerned that you are either going to explode at your MIL or implode trying not to, I think I prefer the former scenario.

Hi feeling a bit more cheerful today - ds is in nursery on Tuesdays, hurrah! That is mean I know. lady I am sure it is all attention focused here too, we have had some boring days recently as DS has been under the weather and it was such crap weather that I didn't think it was fair to him to take him outside to play or fair to others to go to others houses/playgroups and so I think he is currently associating being with just mummy as boring. Which it is probably! He is a little monkey though as well as another trick of his is to always want to be carried when I have DD. He stands at the top of the stairs and wails "CARRY CARRY" until I carry him down. But he is perfectly capable of going down the stairs by himself. Also eating, he won't feed himself except sandwiches any more, when a couple of months ago, I wasn't allowed to feed him! Not that he eats much anyway!!
Re the arguments, we do talk about it and they are not that massive arguments but it still makes me miserable. We just don't agree. He takes any misbehaviour on the part of DS to be a massive worry and stresses about how to stop it. Whereas I will tell him off/possibly give him time out and then forget about it. He is a toddler he's bound to do it (though I am a little worried about how horrific he was yesterday) We also clash massively about food. We had a big talk about it ages ago re the stuff that LadyT's paedeatrician (sp?) said and I thought we had agreed, but he says he thinks we should give him no fruit or yoghurt if he won't eat his main course and basically starve him until he eats. Which makes me very angry! And he just totally ignores the whole "don't praise them for eating, or nag them for not", if DS eats something that he doesn't normally DH just goes on and on about how good he is and I find it massively irritating. He still doesn't eat. Savoury food he will eat only cereal, sandwiches (with cream cheese or houmous), cheese and pesto pasta. And things like rice cakes and breadsticks. There are other things he will eat from time to time but that's it reliably.
Part of my issue with DH and the parenting differences is that it just doesn't seem like him. He's usually so fun and chilled with DS and I don't like to see him getting wound up. And the whole super-strict parenting ideas he have come from MIL and thus make my DH remind me of her ...NOT GOOD. Plus DH acts all different while she is around and tries to "impress" her with his strict parenting style telling DS off more than he would otherwise, etc. Massively irritating.

Oh sadly there is no chance of MIL babysitting! Possibly a bit mean to leave her on her own when she is only here for a couple of nights anyway. But DH and I had a night out last week and will try and do again soon as it was nice. And DH says I should get away and do something on my own this weekend while MIL is here. The problem I have with this is MIL will take this as an opportunity to have a "heart to heart" with DH, which inevitably either means a guilt fest (saying we don't see her enough) or a direct assault on our parenting techniques (rather than the barbed comments when I am around) and will mean DH will be miserable. Also DD will take formula from a bottle now so in that respect I am freeeeeee if I want to be (I cannot be arsed expressing any more)

Avo / jam we do get out loads, and you are right it keeps you sane!!

RIght I was going to respond to people and not be so rude as to talk just about myself but DD is crying so shall post.

Rubes I think red and choc would look nice but the chocolate table runner may make it look less festive than it would on its own. Get the LED one or one with reindeers on or summat!

Right, must cuddle DD!

Ooooh like that bath idea Vagooli, but I'd have to have quite a deep bath and smelly's in it which wouldn't be great for the no tears in eyes thing. I have finally got ds over his fear of bubbles
Exciting about the house! Hope I get to see you when you're here?

DS was so tired and sorry for himself. i just asked him if he wants to go and lay down and he did his really slow Iggle piggle yes nod and headed to the stairs Now sound asleep poor little fella

xed with you vagola. good news on house. souns like you should be able to get it at a good price.

awww your ds sounds so cute rubes. sorry he is ill though.

I keep xposting! Glad you are feeling cup a bit SL -
Re the food thing I think you have to asses the situation (well that it what I do) for eg if ds won't eat his dinner and I know he is poorly or teething then I give him yogurt or fruit but if he's happy as larry and just being stubborn then I'm exactly the same as your dh. MIL however will give him what he likes always unless I say no but I tend to think he knows it's just G'ma being the soft one.
Recently however he is really weird about his dinner (tea) I've been putting it down to his conjunctivitis as it started the same time ish but he flatly refuses hot dinners - even the things I know he loves. it's weird as he'll eat his cereal in the morn or hot porridge from dh's bowl but just gets really worked up about dinner with his cutlery which he used to love and not let me near him as he had to do it himself! He's very big on Fish fingers but has just gone right off the messy stuff and I'm hoping it's not that he's sensed me seeing him spill it all over then trying to help him and wondering if maybe he feels not confident in eating it himself. I'll keep trying though as I'm going to make Shepherds pie later which is (was) one of his favourites.
DS LOVES sandwiches too. Espcially Ham and cream cheese. he also really loves wraps so i make the same thing but like a quesadilla.

feeling cup?

oh and i haven't had shower either!!

i took ds to nursery on the bike with dd in trailer (it is a double trailer but they both can't go in together as ds beats up dd) so i thought i would wait until i was back!

Oh on a plus point with the world dd is lovely at the mo. all smiley and gurgly. she tries to roll over which is cute too. awwwww.

rubes he wouldn't care most of the time if he had no tea. Several nights a week he has no savoury tea. Last night he had nothing at all, I didn't give him fruit or yoghurt even as he was trowing his spaghetti round and it annoyed me. he didn't care and slept fine. I don't think not feeding him would help but he'd just lose weight. And fruit is about the only good thing he eats so I kind of want him to have some.

oh rubes thanks for tip on fb re free sainsbury's delivery mid-week if over 100 quid, am going to order for this weekend!

Oh meant tell you guys, this morning got DS dressed and downstairs, and went to get DD from upstairs. When I went back down DS smelled like a brewery. He had drunk the dregs of my beer that I had left on the table (fortunately only dregs, what do you think I am a lightweight, I don't leave beer) and spilt it all down his front. I had to change his top, don't want nursery to know I am feeding him beer!!

Oh I've been having a giggle about the cup feeling. Of course I'm thinking bra cups. Silly I know but made me giggle.

Rubes what a sweetie your DS is, poor little man feeling so crappy. Rubes if he liking FFers, might he go for long finger food type stuff. I make the boys chicken strips by dipping in flour egg and bread crumbs, but I.only do that because I can't get those waitrose chicken goujons. You could do them with home made chips to keep the finger food theme going.

SL your MIL is driving me mental already, she is so immature. It seems your DH has subconsciously chosen a partner who is completely opposite to his mum. I think its good of you to protect DH but you need a break. You & DH know she thinks those things does it make any difference if she voices them. Just give him lots of cuddles get him to thicken his skin ready for the onslaught and tell him to repeat the mantra, this too shall pass. Then off you go, you'll be amazed how much easier your 2 are to handle after a break. I've been getting out for the occasional cup of coffee with friends sans kids and I am noticeably more settled and happy after those breaks. I think that is why DH is keen to send me off.

Vagooli, weirdly he still wants to eat fish fingers with his fork but yeah I might buy make some chicken strips that's a great idea he would def go for them.
dh will be home earlyish (well 5 ish I hope tonight so we should all get to eat together. He's been back really late (9pm last night on call) so I think it doesn't help when we don't eat tog.
SL yeah best give him the fruit if he's not getting too much Veg.
yes Sainsbo's is a good deal if delivered Tues-Thurs LadyT put me onto that I must do another order too.

Yuk smelly dd..... must change nappy.

Omg that's hilarious Lightening

That IS hilarious SL!!!!!

Oh and also, Vag while I've got ya. I;ve had this lump in my groin area for about 3 weeks now. dh reckons its a lymph node up but it's been up a long time and I have no cuts or anything - should I be worried. feel I should go to the GP really but not dragging these two. have lookd up online and apparently they can take weeks to go down after the infection is gone, if infact that's what it is [eek]

Oh and if anyone's into cleaning products, can I just say Cilit Bang have a toilet cleaner and its BRILLIANT it really is Bang and the job is done

As you can see I'm rambling again.

Lol at too much veg rubes. Unless you count basil in pesto as veg he gets none! Well he did eat half a parsnip he other day. And occasionally a nibble of raw carrot.
Rigth sainsbos order

LOL SL I meant to write "if he's not getting enough!"

Yeah i knew that's what you meant it's just he eats NO veg. No meat either to speak of.

I was worried I wouldn't spend 100 quid on this sainsbos order 70 quid on wine beer ice-cream and nappies so far! Not started on the food yet.