December 2008: because i unwittingly finished the old thread

[waitinggirl]

oops. sorry. didn't realise i was post 1000. hope people find this...

Does wake to sleep work with toddlers this age, Kiwi? If so, might be worth bracing yourself for short term pain in favour of potential long term gain?
Or maybe try cutting back her lunchtime nap by 10 mins each day but still putting her to bed at the same time each night? I have no answers as every time T goes through this phase it just disappears of its own accord, but those are the two proactive things I could think of.

Your DH gets some serious brownie points, Rubes. I need coffee now. My sinuses are still playing merry hell but cough seems to have cleared up. DP is worse today but luckily T in nursery so we can do more house clearing on the last day of our HOLIDAY.

Little bit rattled as my bump has already dropped a fair bit and my SIL measured it yesterday and she said I was measuring quite small for my dates, implying that the head might be engaged already. I seem to have been coughing this one down too. Just need it to stay in for another 6 weeks!

Sounds like you had a lovely week, ZJ, that's v nice to hear about .

Oh, and I found a lovely surprise package for me yesterday - Sybs had sent me a cheer-up present. . It did the trick and reminded me how wonderful our thread is and how you lot are certainly more than 'virtual friends' as my DP calls you.

Morning all just sitting in the car waiting for DS1 to finish school. We hve just been to see 2 houses for a 2ns viewing. We really like both so are going to offer on the cheaper option. It is quite a good location and is right on the corner of the street where DS1's school is located. We didn't get to chat to our real estate dude because DH had a conference call booked in so we had to go.

Anyhoo. Kiwi I have been experimenting with DS2's sleeps. If he has no sleep he won't make it to tea time. If he has a full sleep, it's like putting a chimpanzee on a sugar rush to bed. but if I limited his sleep its just about right. I tend to wake him up after 45mins sometimes an hour if I want another coffee.

Thinking of you DB are they putting stuff in place at home, how is your mum, she must be exhausted. I know this is really sad for you but can I just say when my time comes I hope I have a family like yours around me. Your grandad is very blessed in that sense.

WG how is your DH, I'm still saddened by how insensitive people are on mn. And all my best to your friend. As sad as things are for her now it must be nice to have her around.

veggie How exciting about the house! Keep us posted.

Yes, they are delivering a bed, ripple mattress and some other stuff to the house next week for Grandad. My mum is worn out! She was booked to go to Centre Parcs with Dad and some other friends this weekend. We are making her go, she needs a break and will be no good to anyone exhausted. So I'm on nanna baby-sitting duty tomorrow. She has just got an appointment through for the 1st week of December to have her stoma-reversal op. She's adamant she's having it done too.

kiwi Yesterday DS had no sleep, still went to bed at 7pm (very grumpy though), and still woke at 5.30am. He usually wakes anywhere between 5-6ish. But I do seem to remember DD doing the same and then suddenly seemed to sleep till 7 again

On the old eating topic, I think DS just isn't very hungry anymore. Last night hardly ate any dinner. Refused brekkie. Is sat now with a sandwich and is fussing with it...well either that or he hates my cooking. He's not poorly either as he has been running around like a loon most of the morning.

wg Did you talk to your dad? How's DH?

Oh and beans how are you feeling, a bit brighter I hope.

Yeah he's good like that Spot (dh) he wakes for work about the same time ds does and takes him downstairs while he's getting ready for work, then deposits him back upstairs and shuts gate at top of stairs when he leaves for work and brings me coffee (most days) ds usually kicks off at that point as he knows dh is leaving and he watches from the window and screams, so I'm pretty well awake then and coffee is much appreciated!
That was nice of Sybs
Oh hope baby holds on for you but hopefully that means he won't go over due!

Kiwi - yes Chelsea is closest for me as it's really close to Clapham Junction Station where I can get to really easily on the train. I might be going with a friend next week so I'll let you know or you could always come too that place caught my eye because it has wine dodgem cars which I thought ds would love to go on with dh.

Just back from toddler group - ds had loads of fun but got pushed by a boy at the end. Not sure if the mother saw and didn't do much or didn't see etc. ds was ok, just a bit shocked as he did nothing to the little boy.
he was very good though as we drove since it was raining and he held my hand all the way from the car (lucky he didn't kick off as I had dd in carseat which isn't great for the shoulder as it is)

Rubs I've seen a friend 2 days in a row now who has a bitey DS. He bit DS2 yesterday and while it seemed to hurt him he got more distressed by the fact that it awakened the memory of Emily the Rat/hamster biting.him. He was walking around in tears showing anyone who would look his Emily bitten finger not the finger which the little boy had bitten and crying "Emily bites"

Awww poor ds2 Vag.

Yeah ds was pretty shocked as he was just sitting on the little bench seat and got shoved and he fell off backwards landing on his head. I tried to pick him up but he pushed me away and got angry - I think he didn't feel cool

I'm having a massive clear up. I'm tired of things not in their place and the dining table getting things dumped on it. I'm filing stuff and everything We are rearranging our furniture a little to make the dining table more user friendly now that we are making an effort to use it and eat together!

I love organisation

going to shampoo the rugs too but worried about them never drying...

I know what you mean Rubs half our table is unusable as it is a storage unit. The eating together thing is great though, we are managing it most nights of the week.

Aaargh DD is sooo tired and just won't go to sleep. One of those days. I think she knew I wanted her to sleep loads so she wouldn't be a complete grump at the bonfire party we're going to later (that will be 2 of us then).

Rubes/Veggie we have a whole room just full of stuff we need to get round to. And it's not like we have spare rooms). Sigh just can't bring myself to do anything. Watched 2 episodes of desperate housewives instead of doing any chores while DS was at nursery

Anyone else really loving this day of no news? There should be more of it...

Wg I couldn't find your original message about your DH and therapist so don't know what it was in particular he was looking for but I found these people really good. And you pay what you can afford. You have to give it a couple of sessions to really feel your way though. Otherwise I saw a psychotherapist that I thought was great that I could recommend - he's not at lcap any more.

Kiwi thinking of you and your DD's test.

Our DD's still really turning her leg in when she walks and I chased the hospital and they don't have an appointment until next April

Hmm. Suspiciously quiet - better go and check what they're up to. Hope you have lovely friday evenings.

No news Urbane?

Ouch no sleep, not sure if that will be much fun at least no one will hear her screams over the fireworks.

Misjudged DS2's sleep again let him have 45 mins but by 6pm just before tea he started melting down. To be fair he'd been brilliant all afternoon as he had to sit in on DS1's group violin class and then dragged around the shops and he was so well behaved even though it was late. But as soon as we got home he hit screaming demon mode.

ds has been in the best mood the past week. I think it's all because his teeth are pretty much all through (for now) I hope he's the same for me at swimming tomorrow as he was for dh last week!
He's been kissing us, hugging us, eating all his dinner, just generally really pleasant

Have done some major organising today but loads more to do.

I have also cut ds's hair so expecting mil to meltdown when she see's the curls have gone. Had to be done - he looked ridiculous!

Hope ds calms down Vag.

Have nice weekends all.

Hello Ladies

I have been woken up in the cutest way on the last two mornings and I just hd to share. Basically DD2 has woken up at about 7.15am on both days and has been mumbling to herself. DD1 has responded to the mumbling by creeping into DD2's room and climbing over the bars into DD2's got. There they have both laid next to each other for about 30 mins singing songs and giggling while DH and I lie in out bed listening. I just LOVE the way they are with each other nowadays. I was an only child and always wanted a companion. I feel my DDs are real supports for one another.

Urbane - Good luck on the job experiment. In your post before last you mentioned your DH was involved in the license fee settlement. I would be fascinated to know what he thought of the process. I was involved in the scrutiny of the last process and the Tories were jumping up and down shouting that the then Gov had conducted the whole process behind closed doors, without proper consultation etc. Now they are in charge and not only did they negotiated behind closed doors, but they did it so quickly and secretly that we did not even know the doors existed. did your DH feel that? And what is wrong with N's leg. Is it very noticable? I hope you get to see someone soon.

Zoe - Fab news on the job share offer. How many days do you think you will ask for?

Diedre - I am glad to hear that all the provisions are being put in place to bring your grandfather home and keep him comfortable. Good luck with this weekend.

WG - How is your DH feeling now? Could he get one-to-one therapy at the Tavistock? I posted on your other thread. I would not take too much offense at the first poster. She was posting at 5am so I suspect she was sleep deprived herself.

Girls I need your thoughts on having a DC3. I am obsessing about it. As you know DH and I have always thought we might go for 3. He has always been very keen and I have vacillated back and forth mainly because I found the jump from one to two so hard. Recently mild feelings of broodyness have returned. I think because DD2 has become immeasurably easier in the last 6 months. But I have dismissed those feelings because it having a baby the minute your family life starts to feel really manageable and enjoyable is not rational. The manageablity and enjoyment may disappear the moment the morning sickness hits and could not reappear for years if I find the jump to three hard (or, God forbid, anything is wrong with DC3). So basically I thought I would leave it and reconsider in a year.

However, yesterday something happened to make me question my timetable. I am very close to a group of 6 local mums. We met when our DC1s were first born. We really enjoyed spending our first 9 months of parenthood together. Our DHs became friends. They still hang out loads. Then we all went back to work but met up regularly in the evening and at weekends. We all happened to have our DC2s at around the same time so shared another period of maternity leave. We became even closer. I have holidayed with several of them. Our kids are best mates etc etc etc. Yesterday we were all hanging out with the kids and one of the women announced she was pregnant with DC3. This prompted two others (the two I am closest to) to say they were stopping contraception this month. The other two said they were never going for DC3.

I know having another baby is a huge and personal decision and it sounds mad to say I might be influenced by friends, but that conversation has really got me thinking. I would love another maternity leave surrounded by, and supported by, local friends. To me that is incredibly important. And I would love my DC3 to have family friends with kids the same age. Written down it sounds stupid but I am really wondering whether to TTC in the new year. Am I being crazy????

Avo we got started on making DS2 when we found out friends where pregnant. I think it helps to have friends pregnant at the same time for support. But I think.you need to look at everything, you've just bought the new house will it work financially? Career wise would it be better sooner rather than later? Personally I think its a good time. Yes the hard bits are getting easier but its not like your going into it completely naive..

Another bad night with DS1 he woke at 3.30 am wanting "mook mook", which I refused so he cried on & off for the next 2.5 hours. I finally fed him his morning feed when he'd been quite a reasonable amount of time, as I don't want him to think I'm feeding him because he's screaming. Part of me thinks the only way I'm going to stop this is to stop him feeding completely. I just wish he would give up on that wee hours feed. If he would just wait until 6 am all would be fine. Poor little fella.

Then DH got up with him at 6.30 so I could have a sleep in and I had 3 terrible dreams. I would have been better off getting up.

Avo: those sound pretty good reasons to me. And I am a firm believer in there never being a perfect time to have a baby - if you and DH are agreed then go for it. I'm sure your family will happily expand to fit in another :). Bearing in mind that it might take a while, is there any concrete reason not to start TTC now? Or do you want the house move out of the way first (how's that going?).

Veggie: another bad night for you :(. Do you think putting DS2 in his own room (or sharing with DS1) would help? When the boys wake up we have a chance they will entertain each other, though they quickly make their way into our room for a cuddle then an early morning fight over who gets which part of the bed.

I loved your story about the DDs Avo. I suspect if DS1 climbed into DS2's cot he would nick any toy he could see and make a quick exit.

Avo, if you and dh are certain you want a 3rd for sure, then I'd say why wait if you have all that support around you in your friends, as I agree with Effie that there is never a perfect time to have a baby, however, you don't sound completely convinced you want dc3 yet - that would be the only concern I'd have maybe?
Cute story about the girls!

Yeah Effie I know we should but we have tried putting him in with DS1 and he got so excited he went mental and the only other option is the downstairs room which is a bit dodgy ventilation wise (that's the reason we all moved upstairs). We had planned to move them in together when we move to the new house as the boys room will hopefully be bigger than the little room that DS1 is in.

DS1 was like this when he was much younger whereas DS2 was an excellent sleeper when he was younger. With DS1 we removed me from the equation for a few days. So we might try that again. I can sleep downstairs (the dodgy ventilation is ok for me for a bit). And he won't smell me. I'm quite happy with the three set feeds a day but I think he may be holding out for demand feeding, several times a day! We'll see.

Oh I've had a bright idea. I could put DS2 to sleep in DS1's bed either before DS1 so he doesn't get excited by his presence or DS1 could sleep in with us, he sleeps in a kind of feotal position anyway and DS2s bed is fairly big. DS1 only went out of it about 6 months ago so he should still fit in it. DS1's bed is huge for him so we had planned for now to put them in the same bed and then eventually DS2 in his own bed. I know it probably sounds strange but my brother did it with his daughters and they all loved it while they were small. Je had 4 girls and actually built them a big castle for a bed and bought a huge mattress and they all slept in it.

Veggie that's a lovely story - I love the thought of 4little girls in a castle bed . and avo that's v funny that you were involved in last time. I was but went on mat leave before we finally fixed. Dh works for the b b c T r u s t so was in the thick of it. In fact at times it sounded a bit like the thick of it...
Sounds like you should go for dc3 to be honest. But then I'm highly influenced by my own broodiness at the moment. I really thought I was pg the other day which on reflection is probably displacement from not really knowing what to do with life.
Have had afternoon on my own having haircut and doing some Christmas shopping. In moment of lunacy I have bought myself a tapestry kit. WTF? When do I think I'm going to have time to do that? Brain slightly divorced from wallet so am slightly concerned have made some odd present choices too.

dd's leg is noticeable - she turns it in when she runs. Am sure it will probably be ok in the end but she'll probably need to wear boots for a bit. But luckily too young to care
veggie I hope you have a better night. Sounds like a good idea to go downstairs.

DH & I had an a-haaaa moment last night. DS2 woke at 3 and we braced ourselves for our usual screamathon session (its been as much at each other as from DS2 these last couple of nights). I had bought some calpol up and decided to give him a dose just in case he had sore teeth. He layed back down snuggled into me, whimpered a couple of times and next thing I knew it was 6.30! So after several nights bad sleep which we were putting down to behaviour and wanting milk, it turns out it was flipping teeth again. Poor little guy, he was obviously wanting to feed as it helps the pain. I know some people aren't really into homeopathy but this latest bad sleep bout has been since we ran out of pulsatilla, which we used to give him before bed or occasionally top up during the night. I think his pain is niggly rather than excruciating which also explains why he's been a bit easy to anger during the day too. Like hrs constantly got PMT.

am posting something just to make sure MN isn't broken. can't quite believe the silence on here...

I'm here WG. Haven't been posting as have been at panty old work. Very dull. How is your DH doing? I second getting a recommendation from the Tavistock. Bound to be helpful and not £300.

Glad you have got to the bottom of DS's wakings Vag. Hope his teeth settle soon.

Am just about to put a wash on but wanted to ask Avo about the therapy. I think you are very brave to get it sorted and it can only be a good thing to be able to cope with it. Good on you darling. By the way, I think you should definitely have another baby. You are young, you have a lovely family and a new baby would only enhance that. I suppose I would say that, but 3 children is just a delight. No more work than 2, apart from on the laundry stakes.

Right, wine. I'll be back on tomorrow for a proper gossip. Love to you all.

Crikey has there been some sort of national internet breakdown?

Super busy here had my lovely friend down who has been struggling a bit. Really great to see her looking and sounding alot happier. Am so very releaved that she is feeling a bit better about the whole motherhood thing.

Back tom X factor time.