Jan 2009, baby D0Gs and bumps galore.. lets make room for many more...

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here we are. am going to start a bet on who is next to get broody!

Moose Glad concert was good, sad things surrounding concert frustrating & rubbish to hear of bullying resulting in unproductive days! :( Hope teacher is understand and constructive when you see her.

neighbour rushed to hosp last night so ended up having their 6 yr old to stay the night bless him.

Off for girls dinner tonight leaving DH in charge for first time in a LONG time!

Teacher was occupied with another child's Mum this afternoon, so we slunk off without seeing her. Apparently there was no physical bullying today, but a fair amount of name calling. Have had a chat and its not happening in the classroom this year, due to stricter teachers and their placing the bully's seat on the opposite side of the class to ds's. So there has been some improvement at least.

I just knew the little bully was going to start up again this week. I saw him in the playground on Tuesday morning and he had a really lonely and sad look about him.

I think his bullying coincides with problems at home and of course he's just been at home for a week and two days. I do feel for the bully as well, he is the product of his upbringing, which by all accounts is not good at all. He used to be in my guided reading group when I helped out in class in Year 1 and he was such a sweetie, he had the potential to be such a lovely boy, but something changed for him at the end of Year 2 and he seems to have picked out my ds as his easiest victim. It may also have something to do with him being quite fond of me when I used to help out, so being jealous of my relationship with ds1. I think his Mum is no longer on the scene and Dad has 5 children under 10 to look after and his twin is having lots of intervention for problem behaviour (he used to be ds's main bully until the current one took up the mantel) so it can't be easy.

Hi Ray, hope your neighbour is ok. You sound like a lovely neighbour to live next to. I couldn't ask any of mine.

Enjoy your girls night out.

I need to lose a stack of weight, by fully intend sending dh on a chocolate run when he gets home. Its purely medicinal - chocolate is a well known treatment for cramps - isn't it.

Oh Moose always the way with these bully's. The ones who bullied me all had difficult home lifes and I was an easy target Really hope things are resolved soon. Must be such a worry for you.

I tried my DS in the the bottom bunk tonight with lovely nee nah (car) bedding. He calls all cars nee nahs He seemed very agitated about it, so after a few minutes I put him in his cot. He doesn't cope well with new things, so I guess it'll be a gradual introduction to the bed. Maybe I'll wait a few months. He's very different from DD.

Spent this afternoon at Ikea Wembley, I only went for a cheap shelf. DD went into the creche and seemed to have a nice time. DS came with me in his buggy and my stbxh came along too. It's very nice, haven't been there in yonks and it only took 25 mins from mine by car to get there. We even sneaked in a coffee, was most bizarre only having one child and not two with me whilst there. I did feel odd about leaving DD somewhere new but she didn't mind at all.

Sorry about the grammar and typos

I wish we had an Ikea on the island, but no, must make the $150 return trip on the ferry to Vancouver. Sucks. And because we live on the island, there's a $120 charge for deliveries, so not really that much different than going yourself.

Moose Sorry to hear about the bullying again. Man, what to do with these parents of these kids, eh? I blame them, but its hard to explain that to a child that is bullied that perhaps that child has a parent/sibling that bullies them. Hope the school gets it sorted. Sounds like the lunch lady wasn't interested in getting involved.

Ray That is so very neighbourly of you. Not many people would do that these days. I know my uncle would have some excuse why he couldn't.

Speaking of which, the noise has dropped, but when UG went hunting last week, girlfriend was up to her old self. She is so fucking miserable right now. Probably because she is realizing what a fuckwad my uncle really is. He won't even let her put up any of her photos or personal stuff about the house. What the fuck is up with that? She's moved into the spare bedroom too, so, I don't think it'll be long before it all comes to head. She's off for a 'discover yourself' week long therapy workshop thing.

I find it so bizarre that Europe changes their clocks back/forward a week before N. America. What would be the reason? Actually, there's been talk the last couple of years to stop it as is causes more problems than what its worth and farmers don't need more daylight hours farming because they have lights on equipment.

Yesterday was a bad day. So sick and depressed. I cried most of the day and DD kept coming over and rubbing away my tears and hugging me, saying 'Ah Mommy bear'. Too cute and brought on more tears. Glad she is compassionate. DH came home right after service last night, made me eat and have a tea and then put me back to bed and slept on the couch so I could get some sleep. I still kept waking though. Awful pain in my knee started too. Not sure what that is; joint aches for being pregnant I guess. Seems a bit early.

Well, sounds like DD has drifted off to nap land, so I go too. Ciao ciao

Evening

Mm shame u didn't get 2 c teacher today
Glad there hv been improvements in classroom

Dd1 is so tired @ the mo

Tea I luv ikea
Went recently bought loads!

Kritter bed 4 dd2 not in it yet being organised
Mattress, duvet covers, pillow cases, sheets,duvet,
Pillow, swivel chair for dd1 is in her room luvs it
3 white toy boxes, side table etc

Have read, must go and talk to DH, been internet shopping browsing (honest ) all evening. At least the christmas shopping is all but done.

Thanks for compliments on the Halloween decorations Tea, we had a ball. Would love to post pics on fb of us all dressed up but not one without someone else's child on it and don't like to put them up.

I love ikea too. We had a anti ikea phase in our mid twenties when we got rid of all our flat packed ikea stuff and replaced with proper wooden furniture. Then the kids arrived and suddenly ikea rocks again. It definitely seems to be a cyclical obsession here.

My lovely DD is begging to co-sleep. Argh. When will it end, she's nearly 4 FFS! Oh well, better go and resettle her. Harumph.

Hello from down under! Have caught up a little bit with the thread but very busy and very jet-lagged. N just doesn't seem to get the idea of sleeping when it's dark! But we are having suh fun.

He was a total star on the flight, slept for about 10 of the 13 hours to Singapore, and then another 2 to Brisbane, and the rest of the time made friends and ran up and down the plane. I didn't get much sleep though, and have been absolutely shattered since arriving here. Our apartment is lovely with a view of the ocean and the sound of crashing surf, and a really nice pool with a huge shallow end. But it's raining atm! End of the rainy season I think (we are just in the tropics) so hopefully will stop soon.

Started work almost straight away. Jungle is very cool and unbelievably beautiful, like a very very posh garden with huge ferns and endlessly tall trees - always thought it looked a bit of a set up on tv, but it really is the rainforest. Will be very busy I think - only 4 days off in the next 4 weeks.

Nice to be back at work and catch up with lots of friends, but tough on limited sleep. Keep forgetting I am pg until I see people checking out my tummy and trying to decide whether to risk asking - am dying to answer, 'no, why, do you think I've put on weight?'

Have to run now, sorry for self-centered post but just wanted to bookmark and say hello really. Waves to all!

Hi all.

Missj Good to hear from you. Go Nye with the amazing flying. I'm going to fly out to Texas, 10 hours, on my own with Esme next summer. I'm dreading it as its just me, i have no idea how it'll go, but its one of my best friends and i'll stay for 2+ weeks so hopefully the possibly dreadful flight will be more than worth it.

Lenni How very organised of you with christmas shopping. I have made a list of what i need to get for all, just not actually done any yet!

Chef Sorry to hear of emotional day yesterday. Hope you feel a bit brighter today.

Tea Haven't even considered turning DD's cot into cot bed, isn't trying to climb out, so will leave her be for the time being. Apparently i went into cot about 3, so she may be there a while!

Dinner was nice last night, 11 of us, even though i only knew the birthday girl & one other.

Sister on way over, its her birthday next week & got mobile spa coming over to do her a facial and manicure for present. Total surprise for her. Hope she likes!

Waves to rest of you xx

Oh Ray mobile spa sounds lush. My DD climbed out of her cot and hit her head so that was when I moved her into a bed, so she wouldn't injure herself. I just thought DS might enjoy being below his sister in the bunk now. But obviously not They do share a room though.

Miss J - Lovin' the update, not self centred at all, it all sounds fab x

morning

miss j - great to hear from you
take carexx
wet here today 2!!

hi rray - pressy sounds good

i have just bought a mamas and papas pipi was reduced in argos
other buggy driving me nuts

chef - sorry for feeling down!!

off to legolamnd tom all day and to see fireworks

Hello

Chef, sorry to hear you are feeling low. Do you think its hormonal perhaps? Can you batten down the hatches, schnuggle down and give yourself a bit of tlc for a couple of days?

Hi MissJ, strange to think of you MN from waaaay over there. Am very impressed at N being so good on the flights. I can't bear to even think what my three would be like.

Ray, glad you enjoyed your night out. Mobile spa sounds like a great idea. I'm sure your sister will love it.

Tink, enjoy Legoland. We are taking the boys there for their birthday treats this year in lieu of a party. We're going to make it a big even and stay for the weekend at a nice hotel. They are hotel mad for some reason and will probably enjoy that more than the rids at Legoland.

Ds1 had his other teacher yesterday and she wrote in his feelings diary that she was very pleased wit him as he was attentive, focussed and really worked hard all day. I'm starting to think the problem might be the other teacher. She's very autocratic in style and not used to handling children with ASD, so they could well be locking horns. No bullying yesterday - although a bit of name calling, which he managed to ignore.

We have the school fireworks display tonight and the boys want to go down there for 6.00 when they light the bonfire so they can watch the winning guy go up in smoke. The fireworks won't start until an hour after that, but there's nothing to do while you wait, unless you eat meat and can go and get a hotdog off the barbeque or want to spend £££ on crap glowing/light-up toys that will be broken or have run out of batteries by tomorrow morning. To cap it all, we are predicted lots of rain, but that won't put them off. I am so not looking forward to it, not least of all because I am firework phobic, but have to hide it from the dcs.

Then its the dreaded photo-shoot for Granny's birthday tomorrow afternoon. I've just had to order ds1 a new shirt, trousers and shoes from my Next Directory in a panic, as he has grown out of what I thought he could wear. Fortunately, I managed to get a couple of outfits off ebay for dd either of which will do. One is the most beautiful embroidered smock blouse from Monsoon which was BNWT and I had quite a bidding war on my hands to get, but I think its going to be too big for her. The other is a corded velvet dress, with little puffed sleeves. I've ordered a pair of shoes to match the dress from Next as well, so am keeping everything crossed that they deliver it all in time before we have to go out.

I worked at Legoland for 4 years when it first opened when I was 17. Good times, enjoy the fireworks tomorrow.

I'm wrapping the DCs in all in one waterproofs for tonight. I'm quite looking forward to it though It's light rain forecast here though and minimum of 7 degrees.

Mobile spa... ahh, lush. I would love a spa day... god knows I need some waxing done. lol A few weeks ago my girlfriend posted that there was a yearling bear over on Millstream, which is a shopping area, and quite scary really that the bear was there because it means it traveled through suburbia to get there, but I laughed and said, "No that was me. I told you I needed a good waxer." lol I crack myself up sometimes.

OK... bitch post.

Ah yes. Hormones. Well, I chalk up my emotional mess being exacerbated by them, but a lot of my grievances started before. I told DH that I simply cannot go on like this anymore. He leaves for work at 9am and gets home well after midnight. Sunday is a right off because he sleeps or we have an engagement to go to and Mondays, I work, or at least try to because I too am completely knackered. I know that the monetary thing is unfair to say, but he doesn't make the money to be working these hours. My 'job' is not mommy. I am the mother portion in a family. Having a family is not a 'job' but a lifestyle. I know there are plenty of women and men who love to stay at home and thats there thing, but I need to work, and I have sacrificed so much coming back to Canada, and he hasn't at all. He tells me he doesn't socialize at work but on Facebook, people keep posting pictures and tagging Peter, his friend and boss, and so the pictures come up on my news feed so I know he is socializing at work because he doesn't have his Chef whites on most times. He stays late to do cleaning! I told him as Head Chef, that is not his fucking job. That's why you hired all those bloody kitchen lackies. He doesn't seem to truly understand that I do not have anyone to confab with about art here. He is at work, working at a job he loves, working with like minded people and having a rolling good time. I'm spending my days where my routine surrounds finding activities for DD and getting dinners/bath/bed stuff. I admit, I wasn't prepared for the tedious nature of motherhood. He actually had the audacity to razz me about not picking up oatmeal yesterday. "You had a list!" he says. So fucking what! I forgot the damn oats. There's hoards of other breakfasty things DD can eat. FFS. The only night out we've had alone was at his brother's hick wedding, where her family fucked off inside the house after dinner and locked all the doors. WTF! And it wasn't much of a spending time together evening anyhow... not even remotely. I told him he needs to have at least one day a week that he doesn't need to go in to work until at least noon and he said ok, which leads me to believe that it is easy for him too, he would just rather be at work then at home with his family. He wants the 'family' but I feel like he just takes it for granted that we are here when he gets home. He's slept on the couch the last two nights because I've been unwell and not sleeping. Between DD waking a few times a night and his snoring, I'm just not getting sleep. And to top it all off, I've been to the gym a total of 3 times since coming back from Ontario because of his work schedule. He tells me I could go a 6 and be home in time for him to go to work... HELLO!!! I'm hardly sleeping and you want me to get up at 6am to go to the gym because you have some twisted sense of work obligation that overrides your family. WTF! I don't think what I am asking for is selfish. Perhaps if he was making 6-7 figures like Gordon Ramsey or Jamie Oliver, but he isn't. I'm tired of living in my fucking uncle's basement, paying his fucking mortgage, listening to them, and am dying to have a studio and work myself and nurturing me and providing for my family and not seeing pictures of my husband sipping champagne on Facebook pictures while I'm at home crying my fucking eyes out because I am not getting the support I need to get what I need to do, done. And with his massive pay cut he took for this job, there is no way in hell we can afford daycare now. Ok... bitch about husband done.

Then I spoke to MIL yesterday to have her tell me things like, "Sleep when DD sleeps and get to bed early" and I said, trust me, I am. I told her I just needed to get work done though and she says "Don't worry about the dishes or anything. It'll be there later when you have a moment." I told her I meant my artwork and she says "Oh, well, that definitely can wait till later. It'll still be there when the kids are off to school." Ya. The art will be... but the agents won't. That would be a career bullet to the head having my agents in East London dump me. FFS, I'm not some shite little watercolourist making seascapes for the Moss Street Paint In... (a real hack of art show in Victoria with about a hundred 'abstract' and seascape artists and tonnes of Emily Carr and Group of Seven wannabees... no wonder the Canadian art scene is fucking laughable in the art world. Only my relatives on my dad's side understand the seriousness of being an artist. The rest seem to think its a hobby or something. Christ! My work sells for thousands of pounds! If I could sell three works, we'd have a downpayment for a house. Why wouldn't my family want to support that, particularly my husband? Go figure. I'm at my wits end. Ok... MIL bitch over.

Its burning day here and its stop raining enough to get out and burn garden rubbish... maybe burning stuff will make me feel better. Ciao for now. Thanks for reading.
X

Wow MissJ you are in Aus! Where abouts? I was near Brsbane for about 5 months in 2000 Gload you are happy with accomodation, hope work proves good too.

Moose, well done on gathering all the evidence. Sounds like truly hard work. And well done ds for not being too upset by the name calling, maybe they will lay off a little if they get less reaction? Who knows really.
Bet your hair is lovely, it sounds t. Must get mine coloured at some point. It's very very very dull and dark at the moment.

DD2 appears very happy and settled in bottom bunk in dd1's room the girls room. Still can't believe I have children, girls, in a room, in my house. I'm not grown up enough!

Tea - hope you had a good eve, and you too Tink. Hello to Lenni, Pat, 120 and Books. Hope all is well.

No bonfire here, we had a few retro fireworks in the yard. DD2 was terrified, but clapped, dd1 was terrified, and hid. SHe looked at a few though.

Off to read Chefs post.

Chef - Hope your H takes on board your concerns and tries to support you more and come home sooner if he's finished ((hugs)) I cannot blame you at all for feeling how you do. I'd feel the same. I'm trying to find the right words to say but all I can think of is "Amen Sister" Must be so frustrating for you.

Your MIL sounded great to begin with with the kindness but pretty daft about the Art comments. Your Art is amazing, hope she starts to realise it's a career and a big deal having a gallery selling your work.

Off to bed here in a mo as I'm exhausted. Fireworks were great, DS didn't enjoy the bangs much but DD loved it until near the end when the rain picked up. Very very wet, even their all in ones leaked a bit by the zip as the weather was so bad. Glad we all went though. Managed to sneak in a pint of Guinness too whilst waiting for the fireworks to begin, which STBXH bought for us both and Monster Munch for the children - felt almost chav like

Oh Chef. I'm really at what your mil sadi about your work.

I totally agree with all your points of view. And I can hardly ever say that about anything, because being libra means I have to turn inside out to see all points of view. However in the situation you describe, I'd say you need to stop the rot and start reminding people of who you are and why it was they fell in love with you. If anyone wants a housekeeper, there are agencies to supply them. You have other stuff to do.

about the oats thing too. Being taken for granted was not in the nuptial vows last time I read them.

Hello Ray, I never typed your name Thought of you though, was at an NSPCC fair today, and saw some Miss Gracie hair bows. Thought of you and your business, hope it's going well.
Apologoes for spelling etc, have the odd typing delay back again

Very jealous Tree that your DD has transferred to the bottom bunk, when my little man won't yet I wanted to get rid of the cot and free up some room in there. The 2 bed flat I live in, is fairly spacious being built in the 40's but a lot of their toys are in crates in the lounge, be so nice to get a storage solution in their room instead and for them to have more floor space to play in with no cot iyswim.

Chef - I could have written your rant. You want to know what I think? Well, even if you don't here it is... I think you should get a couple of days a week daycare for V, rent a studio somewhere and go back to your art. And when the new baby comes you'll manage working round him/her for a few months while they are in the sleepy phase but hopefully by then your career will have had enough of an injection to idle a little again while the new baby gets awkward.

MissJ - ahhhhhh, sounds totally fabulous. Am so pleased for you all, such a great opportunity. Look after yourself and that little girl though, don't work too hard. We'll be missing you!

Moose - sounds stressful to say least. Hope you didn't all get soaked.

Tink - have a fab time, am very jealous.

Tree - any ucas news?

Have great weekends all.

Ray - mobile spa? Wow! That is great, we need one of those here.

Tea - your fireworks night sounded like ours - wet.

Dog - how's that puppy of yours? Hope he's getting easier.

Your flat sounds lovely Tea, I have a really set idea of what it looks like for some reason.
Try again in a month, maybe he'll leap in then. Have your tried putting him in a grobag or some other method of making the bed 'cot like'. Tbh, I think a combination of the safe rail thingy, and the enclosed nature of bunk beds means dd2 hasn't really noticed the change so much.

We notice though. I'm in bed on laptop with the light on and we also notice when she appears downstairs at 11pm with a cheery 'Ey-yow' [hello] and half a toy shop in tow.

Must get cot and changing table down. Am bit sad though. They sat in our old house garage for 4.5 years waiting for number 2. They will probably go to charity shop this time

HI Lenni - awaiting the reference. It's been 2 weeks and still not been added to the website form It's a bummer, and making us nervous. Hull want the forms in

Dog was on FB saying all the dcs enjoyed the fireworks. I saw an update. Hope little man is more settled too Dog.

okay, again, not checking in often enough to catch up - but chef, the riot act, at the very least, for dh! kind of think you should hand dd over one 8am and go off for the day, preferably looking for a work space. she is his kid too, and i don't imagine you signed up to letting go of who you are and what you do. remind him, maybe, that you make art, and he's just a cook...? (okay, that might push the riot act a bit far, but...) hope the burning has helped.

girls in bunk beds, eh, tree? i see c turning into a child, rather than a baby, in front of my eyes, it's kind of shocking. i can assure you that you are not old enough for girls, i am not even old enough, and i'm an antique...

tea, i'm sure the small boy will adjust to the bunk bed soon.

missj, respect. flying with a toddler and a pregnancy to australia: not surprised you are tired...

no fireworks here, obv, apart from the kind on the radio: economic collapse is quite repetitive as well as depressing, it seems. i've been watching david attenborough and trying to take the long view

so here, all's quiet - we are bracing ourselves for the budget (tax hikes, pay cuts, god know what). we are also thinking about trying for a sibling for c, despite my advanced age: i'm off to the doctor for some basic fertility tests over the next couple of weeks to see if there's any point to pursuing it. so that's both interesting and nerve wracking - but we were away with some friends last week and they have a nearly three year old, and she had such a good time with him... she is turning out to be a shy child, in general - anybody else got a shy one? we were thinking it was just a developmental thing, but now we've met a few children of her exact age, and it seems more a personality thing.

i shall stop wittering on now - hi to moose, lenni, tink, dog and everybody

We have a shy one, DD not DS, he is anything but. Good luck with sibling thoughts, you have a donor
in mind?

Economic situation sounds pretty horrendous, is your DP's job safe? Hope so. Good to hear from you.

Tree - one word, CHASE!! People always delay on references. I'd email breezily that it needs to be online by Monday evening or a couple of days short of deadline and explain how wonderfully grateful you are and ask if they need any information to help. Don't trust them to remember.