November 09 - Autumnal times are drawing near, soon our babes will be one year!

[MsInterpret]

Hello ladies, hope no one minds me taking the liberty of creating a new thread and approves of the name choice. We've been moving a bit slower than antenatal so though we'd most certainly have some year-olds by the time we finished this one!

DWB oh dear never mind! that is just the sort of thing I would do!

On the shoe thing H is 4 G ds1 was bigger and ds2 smaller and I must say it seems to have made a pattern in how they've grown, ds1 is tall for his age and now a size 1H at 7 ds2 is still only a 71/2 f and is quite small for a 4 year old height wise. Maybe H will be mr average!
We paid £11 for H's cruisers but there were some for £6 just not in our size, I guess it's luck on the day.
We had another terrible night last night with H, I'm putting it down to his jabs who knows??!

Ds1 is stood in front of me playing (ish) his new electric guitar whilst ds3 is turn the amp volume up and on and off, my poor neighbours!

Yay on another boy DWB, I saw you gave the game away on facebook but to be fair it would be almost impossible to keep a secret for another 20 weeks! At least your dh has time to get used to having another boy.

Not sure what size feet Millie has but I think they are quite small for her age. She is still in size 6-12 month pedipeds! I think her feet are quite narrow, she's a skinny little thing with chicken legs, she looks so funny when she walks, like her legs shouldn't be able to support her! Bless her!

Her sleeping is still awful, I think the combination of jet lag and teething are really getting to her. The other night she just wouldn't go to sleep, despite lots of breastfeeding and cuddling so I just left her to cry (although kept going in to check on her) After an hour I couldn't take it any more and went back to feeding and cuddling, eventually she fell asleep at gone 2am and then ds woke 4 times! I am beyond exhausted!

Congrats ursi!! Starting to get broody over here.

DWB hehe that was fast. Oh well! Congrats on DS2!

SirB Congrats on having your own place. Hope to hear more about it but I'm sure you're busy settling in x

tigger yay for musical babies :)

My LO is with Millie on the shoe issue, helips - I just started to put her in 6-12 mo Pedipeds and they're still quite large on her. My sympathies on the jetlag, poor babies never know what hit them!

I met a children's speech pathologist at the airport during our xmas travels. She had a 6 mo old son and we got chatting while our DHs dealt with the luggage. She said the same thing as your friend, MsI - parents who anticipate their child's every need will find that the child has little use for speech. In any case tho, it's still very early for all that, right?

Helips I hope you get some sleep tonight and that dd is not coming down with anything.

Thanks, she actually slept through last night so fingers crossed for tonight, i'm still tired though! It doesn't matter how much sleep I get I always want more!

Happy New Year everyone!! I am here, been lurking but not posting.

ursi YAY congratulations, i hope you have a smooth and calm pregnancy!

DWB congratulations on the boy news!

katster enjoy your ML, that has gone so fast! what is your due date again?

sirboob glad to hear the new pad is working well for you, it must be heaven living on your own with Bryn?

Shoes - i have been considering getting DS feet measured, just so we can have him move around outside a bit more, but tbh he is unlikely to keep them on! he won't keep socks on, we put him in tights !! I am happy with him being without shoes for as long as possible, DD didn't wear them for a very long time, but she was summer walking so spent a lot of time walking on the beach/grass in the sun, our November babies are not so lucky! I guess I have to get him one pair!

Talking/development - he is saying the odd word, must mostly pointing and going 'uh uh uh' seems sufficient, i think baby signing is great for this age actually, can't remember who asked, but they will not be talking words/sentences for a long time yet, even if they are saying lots of words, and baby sign is a fab way of them being able to communicate with us, i have heard lots of people say it improves their speech long term too. We are doing a bit, but probably not enough [lazy mummy emoticon].

Hi all

Been lurking here too..

On the talking front, Ioan is doing quite well and now has a fair few words in his repertoire, and will attempt any words said to him. However, he still doesn't crawl or stand or walk! He did stand briefly yesterday so I think it's on the vague horizon, but a way away.

I say this as I want to reiterate that all babies do things in different orders, so nobody worries at all about their precious bundle. Think of it as a list of things they have to get done by the time they're say 18 months - some start at the top of the list, some at the bottom and some jump around all over the place. The one thing that is certain is that when all our little darlings are around 2.5, they will all be able to do pretty much the same things as each other

As for sleep.. let's not even go there - awake from 3:30 - 5:30 last night, sigh, then DS1 woke us up at 7..zzzz..
Today he has eaten 3 meals for the first time in about a month (illness has been awful here) so I'm praying this might be the turning point. Once I know he's eating again properly then I can sort out the night milk feeds and hopefully get some more shut eye!

scarlotti ah yes. Sleep. Or rather. Lack Of. Indeed. It continues here. We are working on it, it is a working progress, one step forward two steps back, or is it two steps forward one step back? I do not know any more! We put him back in his own room last night, he is no longer fed after midnight, for the last week this has been the case, but that 3-4 day window? wrong! he still wakes up wanting it. So into his room he went. And a reasonable night it was too. And today, he ate like a trojan. Ate and ate and ate and ate and ate and down by 6:59pm. Result we thought. Badabing. wrong. he woke at 7:45pm, DH announced it was a milk request after 2 mins. And now he is awake again and proper crying. Really really upset, and now he can make sounds rather than just crying it is heartbreaking to hear. And he can also point. So he has been in DH's arms, crying his little heart out and pointing at the door. He wants his bedroom back . And DH won't let me in there I know it Will Be Worth It.

Pav that's very interesting as I am sitting here with my copy of toddler taming, which has reliably informed me that he does not need feeding during the night at all (I suspected as much naturally) and that I should shut the cafe between dusk and dawn.
So, now I need to decide what to do about the dream feed around 10:30 and then the early morning bottle anytime from 4am onwards. I know he doesn't need them, and that he would then take milk when he wakes up around 6:30/7, but how to stop? Cold turkey or gently does it?

I think the answer is probably cold turkey as you have done, and I suspect then he will eat properly during the day.

Another lurker here...

DWB, oops, ah well, not much you can do. I don't think I could have lasted even this long.

Scarlotti, Pavlov - Lucy seems to have gone back from not eating at night to being on the boob a lot. Sigh. I give up trying to enforce anything. She wakes up around 2.30am, comes in with us and falls asleep on the boob. Means sleep for us, too. And I am convinced she helps herself when mama is sleeping, too! She has suddenly sprouted teeth everywhere, so perhaps it is that phase...

Actually she has become more and more forceful about breastfeeding. She is only fed evening/night, but last night after bath she had a proper go at trying to get into my top, resisting my efforts to wrestle her into her pjs.

Scarlotti, thank you for your words about babies developing at different paces - I have been reading the posts thinking, she doesn't even say one proper word, no sign of walking, not even thinking about shoes yet! Oh, she is very talkative, in her own gobbledygook way ('tis very sweet :)), and makes a lot of sounds that actually sound like stories, but nothing recognisable yet. I'll stop comparing and enjoy the way she is.

skorpion, isn't Lucy one of the youngest ones of this thread anyway? They develop so much these days that 4 weeks really make a difference. And everybody it just talking about the big things like walking and talking but there are so many other things. You might not even realise that many other babies of her age aren't yet able to do things that she is doing since weeks. Like one of Paula's friends who is a month younger is sorting the bricks of her sorting box correctly since a month while Paula has no clue what to do with them.

Are you actually talking Polish or English to Lucy? Bilingual children usually need a bit more time to start to talk but then all of a sudden they know more words than others.

sleeping, due to Paula's cold we ended up waking and feeding more often again, and after a week without my husband she even starts screaming when he tries to get her back to sleep. That is a completly new thing and really horrible for me. But I guess, she just needs another week to get over her cold and being back to London again. I hope at least..... It really is two steps forward and one back.

Ursi - yes she is one of the youngest, I know this has a big role to play here, too. It is Polish I speak to her. How are you going about the whole bilingual thing?

Sorry to hear Paula's sleep (and yours!) is suffering again. DH is away for the whole week next week (a first since Lucy was born) so am curious how we'll get on just the two of us and how she'll react when he's back.

skorpion, as we are both German, Paula is more or less monolingual only. She does react to bye-bye though, so it is the first english word she understands. But she uses her normal "German" word to answer and doesn't try to copy bye-bye. She hears English from lots of other people but I would like to have a proper English babysitter as I'm only planning nursery for her when she is 3. Which would be a bit sad for her English, especially as I do not know how much longer we will stay in England. We will go back to Austria before she starts primary school, that's for sure and it would be nice if she could take advantage of her early years in England.

I'm hoping your week without your DH will be easy. Paula had already a couple of times without daddy and this time it was quite obvious that she missed him. We tried to talk on skype every morning which was cute. She has a couple of pictures of her family and she kept carrying the one with daddy around and pointing at him. It took her a while to recognise him at the airport though. But then she was soooo happy to see him. not as happy as when she was finally back home with all her toys though

Ursi that's so sweet!

Well, last night I decided not to wake him for the dream feed and then not to feed until morning. He woke at 11:15 and then didn't need to eat again until morning, when he barely took any milk. It has confirmed that he does not need the milk and so the mission begins.
Sadly he didn't settle so spent the night in with me and so I was aware of every wake and groan as I was wondering if he would wake up for milk!

Hopefully tonight will improve - am determined to crack this - at 14 months he should be sleeping through and in his own bed. I'd like a good night's sleep!!

On a plus though - he stood yesterday for the first time and also crawled forward once today!

scarlotti here, take this, we shall do it together yes? and to whoever else needs it through the night. I have been promised that it will get better, but last night, Roo woke at 3am and screamed the place down for 1.5 hours. Then fell asleep holding onto a crinkly book, woke at 6:15am, fed, then slept til 7:30am. He had milk at 11pm then nothing til 6:15am. And like Ioan he did not feed much at 6:15am, and also slept through his normal breakfast time of 7am. Although when he did wake up he crawled straight into the kitchen going 'eeeeeeet' .

He has had no milk at night now for, well today is the 9th day, and he still wakes demanding it, although does not always insist on having it for more than 10 mins, just wakes several times anyway now. He now knows he is not getting it, just fussing now. Already woken once tonight. AND he had his jabs today, so not a chance of a good night but on the plus side he is a very happy little boy despite his sleep issues!

uris and *skorpion - my BIL is american and SIL is chinese, their now 4 year old boy is bilingual, but spoken to mostly in chinese for the first 3 years. His speech development was quite slow, but now, he speaks in both languages well. His sister also developed slowly for the same reason (although for first two years spoke almost exclusively in chinese with a smattering of english) and now she speaks completely fluently in both languages with no accent in either language, aged 8, and has done for a few years now. She interchanges languages simultaneously sometimes without realising she is doing it, switches instantly depending who she is talking to.

Sorry to hear some of you are suffering with sleep issues. I know how it feels . Sleep is really bad again. C woke at 10pm and didn't go back to sleep until 1am. 3 hrs on/off tears/screaming, DH and I trying to soothe and using controlled crying. Ended up feeding him twice and rocking him to sleep and putting him back in his cot. He then woke at 4am and more tears. Came to bed with us and took 1hr to fall back to sleep. We then overslept and nearly late for school. This seems to be happening most nights. Day naps are bad too as the nights are stopping any normal routine. He survived on 40 minutes this morning and awake until bedtime. I think its the teething and he's not eating much either, so I think he is hungry at night. I'm trying to wean him off BF but that's been a non starter and not a good time to change things. I have managed to get him to take cows milk but in a bottle. I'm off to get some sleep before the nightmare night begins - again! scarlotti Brilliant news with I trying to crawl. C doesn't bother crawling anymore, he is a super speedy bum shuffler. He has started trying to stand on his own today with a big smile on his face. Nice to see you back Pav

scarlotti you are not doing anything wrong. Every child is different, you said so yourself, I is an individual strong willed little boy who will grow up to be an individual strong willed adult who will use it to do great things. He knows what he wants and is not going to give it up easily!

If we all hold one hand, there will always be a hand free for someone to hold on to through the long nights. I will see you in the wee hours scarlotti - cup of tea at say 3am? sugar? lets hope it goes very very cold.

fruit I am so sorry to hear what rotten nights you are having, how absolutely awful for you , Roo was hungry up to very recently I am certain of it. I only feel sure now that he does not need^ it, but even 1 month ago I was not convinced, regardless of what the 'books' say. Our children are not books, or robots, or the same, so it is entirely possible that while most babies stop needing food by 6 months, that does not apply to all. I am realising more and more with DD and DS that books are not always right and our instincts are often right.

Good luck with sleep ladies. And good to be back thanks fruit

I'm still feeding Millie in the night when she wakes, just because it is the quickest way to get her back to sleep. I know I've probably made a rod for my own back but with ds to look after as well I need all the sleep I can get so always choose the quick fix, but not the best fix! Oh well, it won't last forever eh? They all sleep eventually....don't they???

helips that is what i think, or at least tell myself. I remind myself that in 10 or so years we struggle to get our kids out of bed . If I was not working, and able to nap with him in the day I would be less intent on forcing this now and just go with it, but i am so tired it cannot go on.

Well, he slept 7:15pm - 11:15pm, only took a bit of milk before going to sleep at 7:15pm, only took 15 mins to settle, normally takes at least 30 mins, usually 45. And again at 11:15pm, took 15 mins. He then woke at 3am ish and stayed awake crying and fussing til 4am, always 3-4am, always was last time he was in his room too. He tried it on with getting milk, but in the end he was just upset i think because he was tired and not asleep and could not/would not lie down. Once he finally had enough he lay down crying and I shh'd him to sleep while he lay there. He then woke at 5:15am and that was him for the morning, he fed on both sides, and then woke for good at 6am.

I have noticed that he is more thirsty now in the day? I have always offered him water and he has never really been too bothered, drinks a bit but nothing significant. However over the last few days he has been guzzling it down more, and actually asking for it. I wonder if he has been waking so much due to thirst and boob quenching it, so not drinking at night/vicious circle? {hmm]

Fruit I'm always quite amazed at how similar C and I are when you tell us what's going on! I is most definitely a bum shuffler, whilst he goes onto all fours and looks to crawl, I can see that he thinks it's rubbish as he can't use his hands. His preferred state is shuffling around with a car in his hand going 'brrrmmm'!!
Teething was definitely an issue here last week with the resulting lack of sleep and eating. Am hoping that's sorted at least for now.
Last night he ended up waking at 12 and so I gave him a bottle. He drank a fair bit then settled back to sleep until 5 when he woke and I just took him in with me. I just don't have the energy to start a big 'cuddle back to your own bed' thing.
Tonight they are with their dad and so I will get a full night's sleep. Am hoping this recharges me enough that I can be a bit more determined with the sleep training tomorrow.
H and I have relate again on Thursday and we will be discussing making the temporary split permanent. Whilst I'm sure it's a mutual decision, he seems to be adamant in making it my decision - he has always been very fixated in what others think, and so I think he wants it to be that I have ended it and so he's not left his children and wife. To be honest, whilst it grates a little I am just trying to hold on to the bigger picture and think who cares what people think. Most of my friends and family know what the reality of the situation is, which is what matters.

Pav x-posts, have you tried offering water when he wakes at night? It may be thirst and so that would quench it, and also it creates the situation of something happening immediately when he wakes - this gives him something to a)choose not to wake for and b) the message that there is nothing to hang out for. I've heard it's successful and will be trying it myself - also has the added advantage that you can limit intake, and reduce the amount gradually over a few nights if you want.
Just a thought.

Our boys do seem very similar Scarlotti. Just to let you know. We attended a physio appt for C a few weeks ago. The consultant was happy with him but not discharged him just yet. C has low muscle tone in his legs, this is due to him not weight bearing for so long. He seems to be getting stronger each day. Also, one leg is very slightly longer than the other, again nothing to worry about. He's taking steps side to side when cruising and seems to be progressing fast. My SIL had hip issues as a child so the consultant is being cautious and keeping an eye on him for now. After a rubbish day yesterday, C done much better on the nap front so I'm hoping we're making a breakthrough and getting back to a little normality. We had a very bad night again. I'm not letting him cry it out anymore. He has started to stand at the end of his cot, crying and waiting for me to rescue him. He hasn't worked out how to get back down in to sleep position so he?s stuck unless DH or I help him.

Those of you who have or still bf, did your nipples feel bruised when the teeth started to come through? Mine are so tender at the moment.

Good luck with relate scarlotti. I have been meaning to ask you how you were getting on. How are you finding things?

helips sorry you?re in a similar situation with sleep. It will get better that?s what I keep telling myself. There will be plenty of pay back and enjoyment when I can kick C out of the bed when he?s 14 and make him fetch me a newspaper!!

scarlotti yes I have offered him water and he has gone at me and continued to fight. But only in the first few nights, i stopped due to his severely adverse reaction to it! Like I had offered him a cup of something horrid! It has been 9 days since he has had a night feed after midnight (normally 11pm ish) and I have for the most part not fed him before 5am, although once I fed him at 4:30am due to his several hour marathon. Today is the 10th day. So not sure what that says about it all. Other than that he is stubborn!

I am sorry that your relationship is about to end formally but you have come a long way. And what is right is right, even though it is hard. You are a strong woman, who i respect a lot. Remember that you have tried your damndest to make this work and to save your relationship and he is the one who has not given the input required to give it a chance. But you know that.