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Original poster

Allowing a 14-year-old daughter to stay at her boyfriend’s house

159 replies

Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 17:17

Where do people stand on allowing their 14 year old daughter to stay overnight at a boyfriend’s house?

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LejlaKapovic · 22/08/2026 20:08

Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 17:17

Where do people stand on allowing their 14 year old daughter to stay overnight at a boyfriend’s house?

My standing is, why is a 14 year old in a relationship to begin with? No way I'd allow that. And even more no way to 14 year olds of the opposite sex spending the night together at each other's houses.14 year olds aren't supposed to behave like adults, or be encouraged by parents and society to play House.

Original poster
Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 20:10

LimpRat · 22/08/2026 20:07

She may hate you for standing firm and saying NO now, but when she's an adult and maybe with her own child, she will be very grateful that you protected her with safety and boundaries in mind.

When I was that age I was "allowed" to have a bf stay overnight, and stay at his (he was in his twenties....🫪) and it fucked me up, long term, having no parent willing to look out for me and actually put rules in place to show their love. It's taken a lifetime to heal from the damage. Yours doesn't have the age gap, but the same fact remains- she is a child. And needs telling what is acceptable and what isn't, legally and emotionally.

Thank you for this!! This is exactly my thoughts, I have to be patient with these things and stand firm! I remember thinking not being allowed out after a certain time was the end of the world and I don’t hold anything against my parents for that! Also they would of NEVER allowed me to do that!

OP posts:
MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:12

Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 19:59

I’m not sure what you mean by "Pretty baby vibes" if honest and not being funny just genuinely don’t understand lol! I’ve said no I think it’s a joke. She’s already "ran away" to DGM but I have "find my" on her phone

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14 year olds Families General parenting
CoolestDogInTheWorld · 22/08/2026 20:18

Not sure this is real. Why has OP volunteered when her daughter started her periods. No one asked. Why has OP said daughter was 14, now 13. 🧐 Not everyone is what they seem.

MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:19

LimpRat · 22/08/2026 20:07

She may hate you for standing firm and saying NO now, but when she's an adult and maybe with her own child, she will be very grateful that you protected her with safety and boundaries in mind.

When I was that age I was "allowed" to have a bf stay overnight, and stay at his (he was in his twenties....🫪) and it fucked me up, long term, having no parent willing to look out for me and actually put rules in place to show their love. It's taken a lifetime to heal from the damage. Yours doesn't have the age gap, but the same fact remains- she is a child. And needs telling what is acceptable and what isn't, legally and emotionally.

This and absolutely this! We see on MN so many grown women in abusive relationships, wanting to leave in their late 30s, 40s. A life time of abuse and dysfunction. And we also see positive, successful relationships for our DC.

They are children. Let them be children. They need boundaries. We parents set those boundaries.

MDDR · 22/08/2026 20:36

Absolutely not.

Original poster
Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 20:36

CoolestDogInTheWorld · 22/08/2026 20:18

Not sure this is real. Why has OP volunteered when her daughter started her periods. No one asked. Why has OP said daughter was 14, now 13. 🧐 Not everyone is what they seem.

Clearly not reading the whole thread and context! When asked about having conversations with her about sex and her understanding, usually this is when conversations like this happen, when puberty and periods start!! She’s 13 14 in mid September stated numerous times in the thread. Get all the facts before making unhelpful and unnecessary comments

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CoolestDogInTheWorld · 22/08/2026 20:37

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Original poster
Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 20:40

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Please explain what might happen because of this. What is it I’m being careful of exactly?

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CosyCushion · 22/08/2026 20:42

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MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:43

This is not a “who’s done it”. This is real life!

Soontobe60 · 22/08/2026 20:44

Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 17:23

Apparently I should be more trusting according to my own mother and sister! Which is besides the point. I thought I was going crazy! So thank you all for the support!!

Trusting in what way? That they’ll be shagging???

Original poster
Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 20:46

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THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHO MY DD IS!! SOUNDS LIKE YOURE THE WIERDO LOOKING AT THE THESE TYPES OF WEBSITES. FREAK 🙄

OP posts:
MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:46

MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:43

This is not a “who’s done it”. This is real life!

@CoolestDogInTheWorld, what are you trying to do?

Teainapinkcup · 22/08/2026 20:46

Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 17:17

Where do people stand on allowing their 14 year old daughter to stay overnight at a boyfriend’s house?

NO CHANCE

Original poster
Tlt5 · 22/08/2026 20:47

Soontobe60 · 22/08/2026 20:44

Trusting in what way? That they’ll be shagging???

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That they won’t be I guess….god knows tbh!!

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MovesInHerOwnWay · 22/08/2026 21:08

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MovesInHerOwnWay · 22/08/2026 21:10

MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 20:43

This is not a “who’s done it”. This is real life!

It’s not though. It’s just the same old perv with the same story as last time hoping for shared stories of teens having sex.

MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 21:12

MovesInHerOwnWay · 22/08/2026 21:10

It’s not though. It’s just the same old perv with the same story as last time hoping for shared stories of teens having sex.

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Really?

maxslice · 22/08/2026 21:12

That’s a hard NO from me.

MovesInHerOwnWay · 22/08/2026 21:18

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MovesInHerOwnWay · 22/08/2026 21:39

Yes, delete me for pointing out a perv trying to get people to talk about their teens having sex but leave the thread up. 🙄

MNLurker1345 · 22/08/2026 21:53

LejlaKapovic · 22/08/2026 20:08

My standing is, why is a 14 year old in a relationship to begin with? No way I'd allow that. And even more no way to 14 year olds of the opposite sex spending the night together at each other's houses.14 year olds aren't supposed to behave like adults, or be encouraged by parents and society to play House.

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@LejlaKapovic , I am not into these young relationships but I have seen on MN that they do happen.

We will be told on MN that we have to get real, that we are not living in the real world, but as I said earlier one person’s normal is not everyone else’s and vice versa.

In my DGDs school in year 7, they all shacked up, a relationship lasting all of two weeks. Now going into year 11, there are only 3 girls in relationships. It is a small independent mixed school. Who am I to know? I speak to my DGD and she has a good relationship with her parents also.

This is such a difficult time for them, education is what is important. Relationships become derailing. Not everyone is academic, but they do need to get through school.

GoodnessGraciousMeh · 22/08/2026 22:00

Absolutely not , and I wouldn't be encouraging her to have a boyfriend at 13 either, she's far too young.

WatchingShadowsPassingBy · 22/08/2026 22:13

It’s not though. It’s just the same old perv with the same story as last time hoping for shared stories of teens having sex.

⬆️ ⬆️ ⬆️

🤮