Can school stop this?

[CherryCherri]

My son collects my daughter from school whilst I wait outside with my other child. My son is 12 and my daughter is 7. The school were fine with this as I was waiting just outside and they are aware of this, never been a problem for 2 years. However a new headteacher started last year and suddenly it’s now a problem. Now siblings have to be 16 to collect. I explained my situation and why my son is collecting and that I’m waiting right outside and at no point is he ever expected to bring her home alone, they were ok with this until recently and now it’s a problem again. I’ve repeated again I am just right outside, members of staff can see me and I can see my son the whole time he is in the playground but nope they have refused and said he isn’t allowed to collect her and bring her to me. Now I hear time and time again on here that schools can’t dictate this but can they? They refused to allow my daughter to go with my son the other day so seems the school do have the final say. I’m asking if I insist he collects her can they stop it and I’m guessing all they could do is refer to ss, how would ss view this situation?

That’s so much better for your 12 year old too…

Wouldn't that solution work just as well at the usual collection time? This will impact everyone in both DC's classes.

Social Services would take into account the circumstances.

The 12yo is responsible for walking the 7 yo across a playground.

The school is being completely ridiculous.

Looks that way - the school obviously know op’s situation so you’d think they would be the best place to start rather than drip feeding on MN and leaving people guessing!

They would allow that because they are both safe inside the school building. It’s leaving the school grounds that is the problem.
How you are physically able to collect them 15 minutes early from the school building, but not just pick them up at normal pick up time and save all this fuss is puzzling though.

Op isn’t willing to discuss their situation so we will never know

She's said numerous times that she has a reason but does not want to share it. Nobody needs to know what her reasons are. Her question is whether the school can enforce it or not.

Yes but then how are people supposed to help???? Op has just updated and said she’s sorted it with school now and she wasnt willing to give anyone any information for them to be able to help so just don’t see the point in her post

Except that in law you cannot create a contract where there was non. You cannot charge an amount after the fact for services not asked for and without pre-agreement of payment.

Also the child mother is there, they are detaining the child.

I'm glad you have a solution, OP.

Well done, I'm glad you got it sorted to your satisfaction.

She must have spoken to the school - as getting kids out early can be a nightmare even with permission.

Plus next year 7 old will be 8 and may be allowed to walk out by herself to car or round to reception where Op can meet her or Op can talk to school and make a new plan.

“She must have spoken to the school”

Mmm. Yes. I guess she must have done.

I’ve only read a few pages so apologies if this has already been said. SS would not be concerned by this, in fact if a referral was made, they would probably question why it has taken the school so long and why they’d agreed it in the first place to then suddenly be concerned.

Possibly illegally stopped and having the engine running??

I get you. As you can be seen by the teacher and they know your reason, your school is being unreasonable.

What's more, many seven year olds walk home by themselves or with others if their school is very local.

If they dig their heels in, go to the governors. I understand their rule as a general safety guideline but there are always exceptional circumstances and it is her brother picking her up, not a stranger - with you in sight!

I'm appalled.

Good luck.

It's a perfectly reasonable question - why can't you collect her if you're just outside?

I wouldn't allow one of our Y3 children to leave with a Y7 sibling.

this. I think you are a bit lazy OP

Even if the parent was standing at the school gate waiting for them?

im not sure why people feel they NEED to know what the issue is.

It's due to disability. so either the OP or her other child cannot access the school at pick up time for whatever reason, be it physical or sensory (autism) related reasons, and her other child cannot be left with the 12yo.

Glad you got it sorted OP.

I’m glad it works out better for you, but it’s certainly not for the better of your children having to be the odd ones out leaving early every day 😔 sorry the school wouldn’t work with you on a solution. Again, I presume because in this case you are now going to come and get them at reception, it proves that you are able to, so they will be reluctant to agree make an exception for your 16 year old to collect at the usual time.

I really struggle to see how this is the right solution.

Given op has never done a drop off/pick up I suspect an issue with dad or another parent/school worker. Why else be so cautious about revealing why. They can go to school but can’t enter the grounds? No
contact with any other school parents? Bizarre. If it’s for a disability for any of them a reasonable adjustment would be made. OP won’t be back as ‘apparently’ it’s all sorted within hours after months of refusal and potential SS involvement.

tell me you didn't read the thread without telling me you didn't read the thread.

She's said she is a lone parent.

It hasn't been 'months' of refusal, policy was changed in march, agreement was given for differentiating it for OP, which has now recently been denied randomly again. OP was simply asking if the school could do that, and what would happen if they reached impasse and school called SS over it.

So you spoke to the school and have come up with a solution that works better for you…