To hate the phrase "No Thank you"

[Wishingplenty]

I really hate the phrase "No Thank you" often said to a very young child, usually in a high pitched condescending tone, often when said child just wants to interact in a friendly manner with whoever is saying it's child.
Case in point, my 10 month old baby who has just started crawling, crawled up to a child about 3 and wanted to look at her boots. Mother of said child says loudly in a really high pitched condescending to tone oh "No Thank you" to my baby son.
Why say this to a baby? and why are you teaching your toddler to be totally unpleasant to a much younger child?
I have encountered this a few times to varying degrees with other children and just find it so utterly rude and nasty and most of all completely unnecessary!

This. It was said in the same way as "You're Welcome" is usually said. In that really sarcastic nasty way. Teaching her child how to be a future mean girl at school.

No no, I think you'll find it's full of venomous contempt .

So no thank you = venomous contempt 😂

erm, okay op.
maybe you’re the one who needs to stay at home if this one small interaction has tipped you over the edge.

😂😂

Oh for god's sake is there nothing an op can ask on here that doesn't get these kinds of answers?!
A baby crawling up to a slightly older child does not warrant a "NO THANK YOU"
op there are too many people in the world with a stick up their arse! Children interacting with each other shouldn't create such drama.
Talking about respecting boundaries and "maybe you should be supervising your baby" 🙄🙄🙄
I never came across this rubbish when my children with babies and toddlers thank bloody god.

ROFL it definitely does not amount to bullying a baby 😂. One of the more ridiculous things I've read on here. Nobody was unkind to your baby - if your baby had been mine (and yes, I've got children), I'd have been picking him up, apologising to the 3yo and telling my baby "oh, no, we don't touch other people's things."

The same attitude being taught to the 3 year old. As if life works that way that you can just announce "no thank you" whenever you please.

Erm you can? Obviously there might be consequences, for example if someone is paying you to do something, but you can always say no thank you to anything.

@ClarasSisters

Your child does need to learn to respect others' personal space.

She's a baby.

I hate Mumsnet so much I love it. The responses on threads like this are so fucking ridiculous.

👆
Really simple, isn't it?

In the nicest possible way, OP, no-one cares about your baby. The people at the groups care about their own children. They don’t want to entertain yours and they certainly don’t want yours crawling up to them and touching their things.

Bitchy and unnecessary. And clearly not what the op means.

You sound deranged tbh

Real life doesn't work like that. You can't "no thank you" your way out of anything like a diva and call it "boundaries"

People actually have to navigate the world with other human beings.

I know a mum who does this "no thank you" shite with her daughter as well. Her daughter also parrots "respect my body" when other children so much as breathe near her. The girl is now 4 and already a haughty little Madame with no friends.

Let's have the whole story then, OP.

10 month old babies explore by putting things in their months. If they can touch it, they try and put it in their mouth.

Which part of the child's shoe was your baby trying to put in its mouth?

Bet you’ve got a dog who loves jumping up at people and you think we all love it

Social grace!! You have no idea what the mother could have been trying to prevent. The OP would be the first to complain if her baby had ended up being kicked, no doubt. The mother of the other child could have had perfectly good reasons for trying to keep the baby from touching her child's shoes. I have no idea why the OP would want her baby touching peoples shoes anyway, but hey. So glad for you that you live in a perfect area, with perfect people.

Another example of why I'm glad I live where I do and encounter the people I do.

Mumsnet is like an alternate universe. Sounds sad and lonely.

Sorry you’re getting a hard time on here. She sounds passive aggressive and annoying and I would never react to a 10 month old baby that way

Completely agree - haven't read much past page 1 but surprised at the snarky replies. People are weird sometimes.

OP I'm with you completely on the condescending tone. Makes me cringe.

The 3 year old was not actively bullying your baby! Slight over reaction and to use words like ‘venomous contempt’ in this situation is just ridiculous. Do you know the 3 year old? The mum does and maybe she knows her DC might not react well to a baby or anyone touching their boots or mum could of been avoiding your DS being stood on.

It's OK, he's friendly 🤣

OP has to be on the wind up

I disagree with your premise that because they were at a toddler group they should have interacted with any other baby or toddler who approached them. Maybe they just wanted to get out of the house, maybe they enjoy playing with the toys or doing some of the activities that are there.

I agree with this- most of the time these groups cover a wide range of ages and there’s an unspoken expectation that the babies do one thing and toddlers do another for some of the time and parents help by keeping their kids to appropriate areas etc- if toddlers just had to stay mute or pretend to be doting on annoying little babies slobbering over their favourite shoes I suspect the groups wouldn’t fare well.

Others like monkey music deliberately segregate walkers/ toddlers from babies but unless the 3 yr old was well outside the advertised boundaries of the group she was totally entitled be there AND have her mum say “no thank you.”

@LadyKenya

So glad for you that you live in a perfect area, with perfect people.

I live where people are kind to each other and baby and toddler groups are for children to mingle and parents to talk to each other. Not to passive aggressively send message to other parents via their children like ventriloquist dummies.

If there was some incredibly exceptional reason this child's diamond-soled shoes can't be interesting to a 10 month old baby, the mother is a fully grown adult with a wide vocabulary at hand who could talk to the other mum and explain.

Venomous contempt?