Lost school jumper....told no pocket money

[crystalmazelab]

I guess I'm just after a bit of reassurance here...or to be told otherwise maybe! Eldest is 9...had brand new school jumper 3 days....£30. Lost at school. I've said it will now have to be paid for out of their pocket money.
Have I been too harsh? I can't afford to just find the money for a new one - had a set of twins start school last week too and the uniform bill has been horrendous! Divorced and no offer of help financially from their dad towards extra cost of uniforms this month (pays basic CMS)

I just feel a bit guilty ....I think part of it is I feel a bit triggered by her lack of respect/care because her dad was like that. Blase attitude because good old Crystal would just replace it when things broke/needed fixing/got lost as I was the main earner in the marriage and pretty much paid for everything.

I think that docking pocket money for genuine accidents is a bit harsh. Perhaps they should be docked a token amount like £2 if they are not quick to learn their lessons.

I would be buying a non branded replacement and refer the school to GOV school uniform guidance if they speak to you about it.

Print out the school logo on paper and stick it on with Sellotape if they keep pushing.

I feel your pain and has for the harshness I think this depends on how many have been lost.

My middle son tends to lose at least 2 jumpers a year, just from being careless and not thinking, he is 14. He is now on next one you pay for.

And in my experience labelling means nothing! I've always labelled and only had one returned.

I'd probably insist on us both retracing her steps and take her to the office at school to report it lost. She didn't lose it on purpose but she has to make an effort to find it. How that went would determine if there were other sanctions. but then I am old.

It’s not your child’s fault that you wanted more children, which you laterally find unaffordable. Very harsh on the child, who unless they purposefully threw the jumper in the bin, hasn’t done anything worse than be forgetful (common in kids). Was the item labelled, as per school rules, if not that’s 100% on you.

You’re letting your feelings about your ex impact on how you deal with your daughter. It’s not fair to her. Yes she needs to learn to take care of her belongings but it's unreasonable to expect a nine-year-old to forgo her pocket money for so long, or have reduced Christmas presents, because of a moment's carelessness. She acted childishly. That’s because she’s a child. (And you don’t even know it was her fault. She might have been nowhere near her bag when she took the jumper off, and unable to go to it, put the jumper down temporarily and another child might have accidentally taken it.)

This

Far too harsh to make a 9 year old pay that amount. Children lose things. They go on losing things right into their teens. It's part of being young and scatty.
To leave her with no pocket money for ten weeks is savage. It will seem an eternity to her.
I can see why you are upset but another child might have picked up your daughter's by mistake. The jumper could be down the back of a chair and been overlooked. It isn' t necessarily your child's fault that this has happened.

@80smonster

Very judgy and rude

Conceiving Twins was a surprise like they variably usually are 😳

And when I fell pregnant with the twins we were a two income family with two working adults money was not an issue

Anyway it has hasn't reappeared today - she admits she didn't use the boxes by year/class the school put out at break time specifically to put jumpers/cardigans in etc when they get taken off. I have checked with other parents on the parent group if anyone has accidentally gone home with it. So I would think it's a repeat of last time when she slung it on the fence and it went over into next door

@80smonster and if you actually read the whole thread you would know I labelled it!

I don’t know. Kids don’t tend to lose things on purpose. What’s the point of your message? Also is it labelled?

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT - 📢

IT WAS BLOODY LABELLED!!!!

Oh dear 😅 this happens and sometimes it’s another kid who has picked up the jumper / dress / cardigan by mistake and it shows up .
it is a ridiculous price for a school jumper though so I’m not surprised you’re annoyed but try not to let that show to your child .
My oldest daughter came back in someone else’s school dress which was very very short 😂 on her .
Turns out that another much smaller girl had picked up her dress after PE .
so it was the only dress left as my daughter had been slower to leave the PE class ( was helping the teacher )
No class WhatsApp groups back then so I just washed and dried the “ wrong “ dress and met the mum to swap .

@Packetofcrispsplease
Luckily PE days now they go in all day in PE kit so no more missing shoes socks shirts etc

@InandOutlander
😂

@Newsenmum
I know she didn't lose it on purpose. My point is her attitude to the situation and lack of care. If it was accident fair enough - like she put in in the playground storage bins and it wasn't there when she went back because someone else picked it up

Perhaps you could make the point in a different way, e.g. "I was hoping we would all be able to go to the cinema/ out to McDonald’s today but we can’t afford it now because we have to buy you a new jumper." A nine-year-old is old enough to understand budgeting and a need to live within your means, but I think making her pay the full cost of a new jumper is too harsh.

Not too harsh. Age 9 is old enough to be responsible for her belongings. Especially if she's already becoming a wasteful shopping addict.

So annoying when school uniform gets lost or taken! My daughter ( only child ) has just turned 8 just started year 3. I always make sure her stuff is all labelled and make sure I check she has everything like cardigan, water bottle, and anything else in her bag before we leave the school now! Been many of times from nursery right up to year 2 where things were lost or taken like her cardigans. Even having names in cardigans or jumpers still doesn't matter though, as someone had taken her cardigans a few times with her name in. And missing items will never turn up in lost property! You'll find parents will cross the names out, and just keep for their kids! Happens a lot in my school, pain in the neck though so expensive!

Wow at £30. What colour is it

Purple ? Yellow ?

A friend has this colour and hard to buy unless from school shop but sure it's still Around £12/15.

Def not £30 !!!

Supermarkets stock the usual blue red green jumpers

Our school has a logo but doesn't have to have on cardi. Mini blondes likes a logo. Course she does lol

But new are £12 with logo or around £6 without from sains Asda etx

We have a great second hand uniform run by pta and we can email them if need something and they look

For logo Cardis it's £3. So I can buy 4 for the price of 1 new

I would def complain about the uniform. It's wrong to have a colour that can't be bought at sains /Asda

Just seen this is few weeks old. Sorry came up in recent

Did cardi appear

@Blondeshavemorefun

Hi it's a specific 2 colours which can't be bought at supermarkets etc unfortunately

Still not turned up but I've calmed down about it now and she is doing extra jobs to work it off

Thanks for update. Sorry jumper still hasn’t turned up

bloody annoying

This^ . Can you complain to the school governors?