Lost school jumper....told no pocket money

[crystalmazelab]

I guess I'm just after a bit of reassurance here...or to be told otherwise maybe! Eldest is 9...had brand new school jumper 3 days....£30. Lost at school. I've said it will now have to be paid for out of their pocket money.
Have I been too harsh? I can't afford to just find the money for a new one - had a set of twins start school last week too and the uniform bill has been horrendous! Divorced and no offer of help financially from their dad towards extra cost of uniforms this month (pays basic CMS)

I just feel a bit guilty ....I think part of it is I feel a bit triggered by her lack of respect/care because her dad was like that. Blase attitude because good old Crystal would just replace it when things broke/needed fixing/got lost as I was the main earner in the marriage and pretty much paid for everything.

Check with the school office see if its been handed in?? The school might have a second hand clothes sale on?? Annoying though when school uniform cost sooo much

Has she checked lost property?
Any option for second hand?
Not unreasonable for some kind of sanction. But 10 weeks of no pocket money is a bit steep.

Was the jumper labelled and when was it lost? If it's labelled and lost on Friday surely it might turn up after the weekend?

My eldest has lost cardigans all the time (leaves them on the school field when playing) but they usually make their way back to her classroom or she finds them the next school day.

Not too harsh. A good lesson. Did it have a name label in?

Too harsh.
Assuming it was labelled, get him to ask the teacher, look around the classroom, check lost property. If it can’t be found then he can buy ansecond hand or non branded one.

It's labelled and she is going to check lost property but I've said the sanction stands if it's not there.

She just has a really blase attitude to money - was badgering me about ordering some bit of tat from an American website earlier (which I said no to anyway) but only seems happy if money is being spent on her and never seems to say thankyou without being prompted and I'm not sure where I've gone wrong as I'm not like that at all and thought I'd raised her the same

It's branded 😩 and the second hand sales only happen during school time which as a working parent means I can never go

Hmm. It could be harsh. How did it get lost? We've had issues with people going home with the wrong coat or sports bag. When the owner goes to collect their stuff it is no longer there. You can't blame the kid for that. Leaving it in the playground carelessly would be different I guess, but lost property seems inevitable when you have 30+ kids in a room all wearing the same thing.

Her consquences is she gets to wear a none branded one.

I would stop your 9 year old going on random tat websites.

Can you go for unbranded?

If second hand sales are only in school time, can you request a specific item via the office? Fortunately our school holds the sales on a Saturday morning.

How many previous school jumpers have been lost? If this is something that happened a couple of times last year for example, then I don't think it's too harsh.
If this is the first item of uniform she's ever lost, maybe a bit too harsh.

And I'd just buy unbranded stuff from now on - not as a consequence but just because it makes no sense to buy the more expensive stuff unnecessarily. That's all I buy anyway.

@Changeiscomingthisyear

You can't wear an unbranded one - it's a very specific cardigan colour with a detail on it - the school doesn't exactly follow the rules the government bought out at keeping the cost of uniform down (they get round it by holding second hand sales)

@eurochick

Took it off in the playground at break time and forgot about it apparently

Yes, that’s harsh.
Go into school to look for it. Replace with an unbranded one if need be. It’s also possible that someone else picked it up so it might not be her fault.

@DancingPhantomsOnTheTerrace

No option for unbranded unfortunately. The cardigan has a very specific colour detail on it which means you have to have the school one and not one from Sainsbury

same for the twins - a very specific shirt with logo which is only applicable to pre school so will only wear it for a year - and they don't do iron on/sew on badges - the and shirts are £8.95 EACH

This is just a normal primary school by the way

It may still get handed in.

My DD had her sports kit pinched and hidden by someone who was jealous that DD had been picked for a school team and this girl hadn't. Because my DD didn't have the correct kit she got a (imo) harsh punishment from the HT, despite a protest from DH and me.

Hope it turns up, that's a lot of money (why do they cost so much!!)

Would you be able to ring the school office on you lunch brake? When I've done this they've always either found it in the lost property box or offered to send one from the school spares home (our school has a free second hand uniform rail & DS gets school transport, so I'm almost never there I'm person)

Took it off in the playground at break time and forgot about it apparently
It's easily done. Oh dear.

My son has lost three lovely coats in a similar fashion. I've told him if he loses his coat this year it will be paid for by him! Something has to teach them the value of money and things.

I use to write with thick permanent marker on inside hem of my DS jumper and on inside of his trousers pockets as he often lost his items, including shoes and trainers.

I use to write with thick permanent marker on inside hem of my DS jumper and on inside of his trousers pockets as he often lost his items, including shoes and trainers.

I think it’s harsh. Too harsh.
But I’d insist she checks with the lost property etc… it very likely will be there!

I also doubt she is been blasé about money. She will have no idea about how tight things are just now for you. As it should be.
Just say NO and be comfortable with it rather than expect her to never ask for anything.

@Sandyankles

Yeah I might try that. To be honest I rang about something once before and they never got back to me. I find the school ....disorganised at best.

My 8 year old doesn’t give a flying fuck about anything getting lost so I told her if she loses her brand new school fleece, I won’t replace it & she can wear my old brown corduroy one!

If her name is in it, it will most likely be at school.

had a set of twins start school last week too and the uniform bill has been horrendous! Divorced and no offer of help financially from their dad towards extra cost of uniforms this month (pays basic CMS)

This is/should be completely irrelevant to the sanction imposed on your 9 year old.