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Sons dad fractured 3 of my sons ribs

483 replies

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 13:57

Looking for advice,

Long one, on Wednesday morning I noticed my baby was unsettled and had a cut on his ear, he was grunting and I noticed a bruise on his hand, I took him to GP and she called social services, we where referred to hospital for suspected child abuse, I really thought some sort of freak accident happened, I never suspected my then partner ( sons dad ) at the time at all, however scans revealed 3 fractured ribs, on Saturday my sons dad told me he thinks he's done this out of a moment of frustration as he couldn't settle our son... he squeezed him, we told the police, the police arrested him yesterday morning, he is out and waiting to give another statement and charges

However social services have informed me today I am not aloud to be around my 2 children unsupervised, they will stay with my mum, I can't take them home or anything I am devestated as I haven't done this and told the police when my sons dad told me,

I am also struggling to come to terms with this as my sons dad is not an aggressive person and really never suspected this, anyone know what will happen with social services will I get to take my children home eventually

OP posts:
lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 13:59

My son is 11 weeks old

OP posts:
MaryKateDanaher · 27/03/2023 14:00

I don't have experience of this but I can tell you now, if you don't leave your partner they will almost certainly take your children from you. Your partner is an abuser. He could've killed your baby, very easily.

Codlingmoths · 27/03/2023 14:00

I don’t know what steps you should take to see your children op, hopefully others can help. But you need to fully acknowledge that your partner has broken three of your babies ribs and cannot be around your baby unsupervised for a long time if ever, and fully work with social services to make sure arrangements are set up to ensure he won’t be able to see baby unsupervised. I can’t see how you can get your dc back in your own home without this in place. Sending hugs as it must all be a shock and so hard to deal with anything while missing your baby. But your poor baby 😢. One of the 2 adults supposed to love him more than anything has broken his little bones instead. You need to protect your baby.

MeFernBradyMeFernBrady · 27/03/2023 14:01

If your partner is still in your house with you then no, you won't be allowed to see your son.
He must have been 'squeezed' very hard indeed to break his ribs, bruise his hand and cut his ear. Poor little boy. I hope he heals quickly.

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 14:01

@MaryKateDanaher
I will leave my partner, I have told him I don't trust him around them and it he doesn't get arrested and wants to see them it must be supervised but I'm presuming social work will decide that

OP posts:
Codlingmoths · 27/03/2023 14:01

11 weeks 😭

Bunce1 · 27/03/2023 14:02

You MUST leave your partner.

it is either that or lose your children.

your poor baby.

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 14:04

@MeFernBradyMeFernBrady
He isn't in our house, he was arrested yesterday morning and was released on bail back to his mums house, he had house keys which I asked police to collect and bring to me which they have done, police have said he isn't aloud in our house or around kids or he will get arrested

OP posts:
Wishiwasatailor · 27/03/2023 14:04

How did the baby get a cut on the ear?
OP social services are protecting your children whilst they carry out an investigation they are working in the best interest of your children.
Im sure your little one is being investigated medically for any medical reasons why his bones may have broken such as osteogenesis however if there turns out not to be medical reason you need to show you are also capable of protecting your children by ensuring your partner is not able to cause any more harm.

rubyslippers · 27/03/2023 14:04

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MulletAndMustache · 27/03/2023 14:04

Clearly he is an aggressive person. Fucking hell, this is so distressing to read. Honestly, I’d want to kill that bastard, yet you’re talking about supervised access. Is this real? Ffs.

Thesearmsofmine · 27/03/2023 14:04

Your poor baby. Work with social services, make it very obvious that this man is and will remain your ex partner now, move his stuff out etc.
Has he ever hurt you OP?

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 27/03/2023 14:05

That poor little baby. 3 fractured ribs, a cut ear, bruised little hand, from his own dad. How he must have suffered and how scared he must have been. It is imperative that you never ever go back to this man. Please don't make excuses for him "He's not an aggressive man" He "squeezed" him. He didn't squeeze him a bit too hard this was not an accident.

Atteloiv · 27/03/2023 14:06

Three fractured ribs AND a cut ear AND a bruised hand? This was not a simple ‘squeeze’ - your abusive ex has lied to you about the way in which he attacked a helpless baby.

You are going to have to choose: lose your children forever or completely end this relationship with the ‘dad’. Ask social services for help in how to get away from him. Make it clear you never want to see him again, and stick to it. If they think you are taking him back they may decide the children would be better off adopted.

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 14:06

@MeFernBradyMeFernBrady
well this is what medical team saying it must have been with some force I am in complete shock can't believe this, sons dad told me this incident happened on Tuesday we have been in hospital since Wednesday baby did seem in pain but yesterday he seemed s little bit better and again today he seems better so I am hoping this is his ribs starting to recover, absolutely horrible for him I'm just glad he won't remember this

OP posts:
Treeabovethefire · 27/03/2023 14:06

How were all the other injuries caused? Have you ever noticed any other bruising? I suspect this abuse has been going on a while :/

MeinKraft · 27/03/2023 14:07

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TrainersAltonTowersWontKill · 27/03/2023 14:08

Hope this isn't real. You're excusing him.

What do you mean he won't remember it? It'll affect him for the rest of his life in a variety of ways. How old is his sibling? It'll affect them too.

I'd be fighting tooth and nail to make sure he wasn't anywhere near them ever again. You're communicating with him and planning access to them for him! Jesus Christ. Those poor kids.

Not aggressive?! He's evil.

neilyoungismyhero · 27/03/2023 14:08

11 weeks old and he has these appalling injuries..dear God in heaven. You've been living with a monster. Clearly you're doing the right thing in leaving him. I hope you keep your resolve to leave him strong. You did the right thing in reporting him.

BritishDesiGirl · 27/03/2023 14:09

No excuse. He's a fucking monster.

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 14:09

@rubyslippers
Sorry I think there has been a misunderstanding,
My sons dad said the incident happened on Tuesday ( he never told me this until Saturday) I noticed my son was unsettled on Wednesday morning and took him straight to GP I really never suspected broken ribs though, he has reflux and on omeprazol for it so I thought it maybe reflux causing him to be unsettled but I just felt he was more unsettled so took him to GP
As for cut on his ear I noticed this on Wednesday morning too , sons dad said he doesn't know what happened to ear... I am hopping the police will be able to get the full story and I will know the truth of what has happened

OP posts:
Nopinnogin · 27/03/2023 14:09

You have to put the needs of the baby first. Understand that while this is being investigated you wil be under suspicion. I understand the fear, heartbreak and pain of not being around your beloved kids, not to mention the destruction of your marriage and life. I am sorry that this has happened. The way to move forward with this is to comply with them, sort out how you are going to live or where and take time to heal from this bombshell.

Ss are not going to let your husband be around your kids. If you try to have a relationship with him, you will lose the kids. It’s not an easy situation and you have all my sympathy.

Tomkirkman · 27/03/2023 14:10

And what about the bruise on the hand? Where did that come from?

Caledoniablue · 27/03/2023 14:10

This actually hurts to read. A tiny defenseless 11 week old and his father who should love and protect him has broken his ribs. Given he has a bruise on his hand and cut on his ear I wouldn't believe he 'squeezed' him. That's horrific enough but clearly not the whole story.

You need to get him the fuck away from you and your baby OP if you want your child back. You need to show social services that you absolutely do not condone this abhorrent behaviour.
Don't even bother thinking about contact now (or ever) if anyone hurt my child like this they wouldn't even get a glimpse of them ever again.

Beamur · 27/03/2023 14:11

lockdownmummax · 27/03/2023 14:01

@MaryKateDanaher
I will leave my partner, I have told him I don't trust him around them and it he doesn't get arrested and wants to see them it must be supervised but I'm presuming social work will decide that

What a distressing situation.
I guess you now know that actually your partner is a violent person and aggression towards a small baby is about as serious as it gets. He cannot be around this baby or any other children.
Work closely with social services if you want to have your baby back. Hope the baby is better soon. Your ex partner is not the man you thought he was.