have you pierced your daughters ears?

[Justposting]

Still awaiting baby girls arrival, probably far to early to be thinking about this. Have you pierced your daughters ears? if so at what age do you feel it is appropriate, my sister did her baby at just a few months old. I have a friend who thinks it’s not fair on the child unless they are old enough to ask for it themselves, I am currently in two minds,
What are your thoughts?

I don’t understand why people would want to piece their baby’s ears!! I think it’s looks terrible on babies. Why not wait until they are older and understand what’s going on.

When my kids ask for them they will get them done as a birthday or Christmas present depending on good behaviour. They have to be old enough to ask for them, know that they want them and demonstrate how much with good behaviour.

I would never ever pierce the ears of a child too young to give consent.

My daughter is in year 8 (age 12/13). Only 2 or 3 girls had their ears pierced prior to year 8 and that was in year 7. This seems to be the year that most have them done and my daughter had hers done last weekend. In my opinion it helps that they are old enough to clean them and understand why and how to look after them. Hopethat helps

You just don't know at such a young age if they are going to have sensitive skin or a bad reaction leading to infection. My eldest was 8yrs, had infections in both ears dispite bathing etc. She has had 10 yrs of wanting to wear earings but seems to be alergic to all sorts of metals. My youngest was 11, a year on and hers still haven't healed completely.
Why risk inflicting all that on a baby?
Its bad enough when they have to have injections, cry, get a fever and are unhappy!
At least when they are older they can tell you if they are in pain andmake informed decisions for themselves.

I had mine done when I was 9 after constant begging, then found out I was allergic to every metal so my ear was swollen for a good month after. A friend of mine is allergic to the antiseptic wipes they use to clean the piercing/skin around the ears.

Point of this is you never know what children are going to react to and if you can avoid it why wouldn't you?

No professional jeweller, tattoo studio etc will touch a babies ears and anyone under age 13 must have parental consent and parent with them.

I know some cultures do it very early but to me it's abuse at such a young age - I know of at least one case of a grandparent who took kid to get it done and the parent sued them for it as they didn't consent - as in they sued their own parent and jeweller successfully.

Our daughters 3 and won't do it until she fully understands danger, pain and cleaning routine.

(I have 4 piercings in each ear and 6 tattoos)

All of my DC (boys and girls) have to wait until 16 and then and only then will there be a discussion

My DD had hers done at 5 and half after about 18 months of asking she let me clean them daily and looked after them, she's now nearly 8 and doesn't have to take them out for PE but does have to remove them for swimming lessons every Friday but it doesn't bother her, a lot of the time we forget to put them back in until the Sunday and they don't heal over so it doesn't hurt her x

ds was 4. He asked and I had no objections. His gran took them out about 3 months later when he was staying over with her (now that was outrageous, ds was upset and i was fuming at the fucking nerve of her). Ds (Adult now) doesnt wear an earring now and you cant even see a hole on his ear not that he or anyone else cares about it. This whole imaginary drama about holes being left in ears, you'd think people were punching 2 inch plugs into babies ears. I had to get mines done as a teen and wish id had then done as a baby.

I had mine done aged 20. A couple of friends talked me into it getting themselves pierced elsewhere. They thought it was odd I hadn’t had it done. My mum had said when I was 16, but by that age I’d decided not to bother as thought it would hurt. It flipping well did!! And the aftercare was a faff too. With this in mind I’ve put my kids off. 8 year old asked when she was younger. She cries when I brush her hair. There’s no way she’d manage the piercing pain or the aftercare healing pain. I talked to her about it hurting, even pinched her ear tight and said it would hurt more than that and she soon changed her mind. Youngest who is 5 has mentioned it but not obsessively like with other things. She’s less sensitive to pain. I may consider after y6 if they understsnd the pain and can manage caring and taking them in and out. Most schools ask for them to taken out for PE and they have to be able to do it themselves as teachers aren’t allowed to help. Used to be able to put plasters over them for PE but not advised these days.

I witnessed hospital staff insert a cannula into my tiny premature DS's hand. Horrible. I've sat through the innoculations of both DC and comforted them. There's no way I would subject to something this painful that's non essential.

A previous PP mentioned a video of a 4 month getting her ears pierced. In the one I saw, the mum (who was laughing) tries to shove a dummy into her baby's mouth after the piercing. The poor bairn was inconsolable. And before the piercing happened, so happily oblivious to what was to come. Awful.

I'm afraid I do judge the arse off parents of babies with pierced ears. It's cruel, it's unnecessary and it is so chavvy. Are they not beautiful enough for you? I really don't get it. And the cultural argument doesn't wash with me. In many cultures women are seen as second class citizens, objects that exist only to be coveted and possessed by men. Are we saying we're ok with that??

Nope. Firstly I wouldn’t want to put my baby through that pain and secondly it looks chavvy!

Aside from the fact that I wouldn't do something to my baby that I knew would be uncomfortable, just so they looked "cute"... I would worry about the studs on tiny babies pressing into my arm when breastfeeding and being uncomfortable for me too.

I haven't read the whole thread, so apologies if I am repeating or have missed something. My DDs pestered me about ear piercing, I said when they were 16(as I did). I have holes which I have been trying to close for 13years, to no avail! They both use magnetic earrings if they want, but because they regularly do sport and wouldn't be allowed earrings, they are not fussed o getting them done ,as they would be taken out as much as they were in!

Btw, it suggesting this for a baby! Just that there are ways around piecing.

Aaaagh ,NOT suggesting.....

At 8/9 if DDs wanted to then yes I'd probably let them.

Younger? No.

I had mine done at 13/14 which I thought was correct of my parents.

DD had her ears pierced for her 9th birthday last year, as I felt she was old enough for it to be her own decision and not ours.

As a mother who sat for three weeks with a newborn baby in PICU and watched C lines, pacers and cannulas be inserted to them all the while with my little baby's chest still opened up I cannot comprehend why someone would think it's anything but reprehensible to have someone stab their own child in both ears for the simple reason to embellish or decorate them.

I find it disgusting really.

I personally categorise infant ear piercing and circumcision for anything other than medical reasons as assault.

Vile.

Who do you think would benefit from this OP? Because for sure it won't be the baby. I'm interested to know why you'd consider causing pain and mutilating the skin of a beautiful baby
How about waiting till she's old enough to make her own choices. Even as a baby, it's her body not yours. Get a few piercings yourself if you feel the need, but allow your daughter the courtesy of making her own decisions about her own body.

I have a 13 month old dd. Piercing are used to enhance beauty and babies are beautiful anyway. Even if the pain is only for a moment, I wouldn’t voluntarily hurt her unnecessarily. The piercings are not for the baby but rather the parent. I’m in the no camp

I had mine done when I was 13/14 - my choice, I wasn't bothered before that. Dds will have theirs done when they ask enough I know that they mean it and when they are old enough to understand how to keep them clean and not pull at them. About ten I'm thinking.

Babies grab at their ears, often madly rub at them when teething or ill. Earings on a baby just seems like a way to make a baby miserable.

Babies with pierced ears do not look cute.

About 12 or 13 seems a reasonable age. DD is 10, she is still too young at present. Your DC's skin really shouldn't be yours to cut up for vanity.( yes I judge)

Piercing baby girls' ears is an expression of cultural heritage around here, in the Hispanic community.

I think people should be aware that there are cultures where this is done routinely and shouldn't be so free with their criticism.

Not everyone has the same aesthetic sensibility and it does not do harm (yes, I know the tissue gets pierced but as these things go it really is benign).

I let any DD of mine who wanted hers done get them done for First Communion (7ish). One DD got hers done at 10. DS never asked.

I would not have done it earlier because of worries that a younger child would fiddle with a stud, pull one out by accident, or fail to take proper care of a new piercing.