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Should I tell my daughter she has a half sister? (title edited by MNHQ)

999 replies

tedrekasta · 05/02/2017 12:00

I have an English daughter aged 32. She has 2 children.

Shamefully, I had an affair 6 years ago with a Polish woman who I met abroad whilst working which (accidentally) resulted in another daughter. She lives in Poland with her mother (and elder Polish half sister).

I have never told my English daughter about her half sister in Poland.

Historically, my English daughter always yearned for a sister and my wife and I regret not having any more children. We are in our 60's. I am 68.

I have to tell terrible lies to both my wife and my English daughter in order to go and visit my daughter in Poland. Which I do about every 2 months.

I miss my Polish daughter, now 5, very much. But I love my English daughter so much and don't want to hurt her. And I love my wife very much and don't want to hurt her.

I just don't know what to do.

Should I tell my English daughter that she has a very young half sister living in Poland?

I am deeply upset and ashamed of myself. But want the best for my wife, my English daughter and my Polish daughter.

I would love any advice. Especially from anyone who has been through such a situation or similar situation.

Thank you for any help.

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 05/02/2017 13:42

MummyofLittledragon - I take your point and I;m s so sorry you have been through that experience, and pleased that you have been able to reconcile with your DH and move on.

I think the OP's situation is not just about the one off sexual encounter (which we only have his word for - and he is a self confessed liar) but the fact that he has kept a secret involving visits and contact for 5 years. So it is an ongoing thing and long term deception, rather than an instantly regretted drunken mistake. IME it is the lies that hurt so much rather than the actual sex.

itsmine · 05/02/2017 13:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

joystir59 · 05/02/2017 13:56

You have been trying to justify not telling your wife the truth by clinging to an off the cuff remark she made ages abo about a neighbour's affair. All through your posts it comes across that you are trying to decide what would be best for your wife and first daughter- but don't you think they have the right to decide what is best? I agree with previous poster who said you need to tell your wife first and let her come to terms about what you have done, before you think of telling your daughter. I also agree with previous posters that you really need to come clean to your wife about your relationship with your ex Polish lover and your 2nd daughter. You will not know a grain of true peace until and unless you do. You are going to cause your wife and 1st daughter pain- you cannot avoid doing so. You caused it when you had the affair.

Interested in this thread?

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ShoutOutToMyEx · 05/02/2017 13:58

OP, if you come back, just one bit of advice for you and your situation.

I know that the thought of telling your wife and daughter seems insurmountable, and that the pain will be unbearable. But isn't this pain unbearable too?

You say you are desperately unhappy. You are also imprisoned by all the lies that you've told and have to keep up.

If you tell the truth, you will probably still me unhappy, but you will be free. Life is simpler without keeping up a lie. Consider that.

Peanutbutterfingers · 05/02/2017 14:00

I found out about my dads secret children when one of them contacted me on social media when I was 14. This will come out. I no longer have any contact with my dad, mainly because he has kept lying and lying and now expects me AND my young son to keep his secrets from his youngest child. He is a coward who wants us to sort it out when he's dead and I despise him for that and will have no hand in it.

Your poor wife, your poor children. You need to come clean, they will find out and will be worse if it's from someone else.

notyetpastit · 05/02/2017 14:02

'I have rewritten my will to include my Polish daughter.'

There is no question here. You simply have to tell your wife and daughter about your Polish child. Heaven knows how they will feel to discover this after your death.

Please just tell them the truth NOW, whatever the fallout, it has to be better than leaving it.

BoomBoomsCousin · 05/02/2017 14:03

My father had a child by another woman when I was 34. Other woman was younger than me, which was disturbing. I was not impressed by my father's behaviour, but I was glad to know. I've only seen my half brother a handful of times (another country too, but much further away than Poland). But I write to him occasionally and I expect when he's older he may want to come visit (if only as a way to travel cheaply). I still see and speak to my father too, though admittedly he is so,what diminished in my eyes. It would have been devastating to only find out after my father died though, I would have despised him if did that.

Shizzy · 05/02/2017 14:06

Whilst I don't condone your historical actions, you've had more than enough of a bashing on here so Flowers from me.

I hope you find some resolution.

Cakingbad · 05/02/2017 14:12

Tell everyone the truth.
There is no other option.
There will be fallout but it may not be what you expect.
Do the right thing.
Good luck!

Littleballerina · 05/02/2017 14:16

You need to tell your wife and let her decide what happens next.

FabulouslyGlamourousFerret · 05/02/2017 14:17

I too think you are catastrophizing - bite the bullet, tell them and deal with the consequences.

If you were my dad (I am a similar age to your daughter) I would forgive you providing you were a decent bloke and this is genuinely just one big fuck up and you hadn't got 'from' for these type of things!

Your wife may or may not leave you, but I imagine its better than the turmoil you are going through now.

GloriaGaynor · 05/02/2017 14:18

I've a horrible feeling that the consequence of telling all will be that I shall never see any of them ever again - wife, daughter, Polish daughter.

Because I presume my wife would want a divorce... My daughter is a very strong and independent minded feminist.

This is crux of the matter, not the stuff you put in the OP. And you're right you may lose all of them. I'd think it's quite likely that your wife may want to split.

However, your daughter may be pissed off for while, but I doubt that she would cut you off forever. I wouldn't. I'd be disappointed, but it wouldn't the insurmountable. And I'd want to see my sister.

If the Polish mother has tolerated you thus far, I don't see why she would stop now. If she's a decent person she will want her daughter to have contact with her father, and she probably also needs the child support.
Not saying you wouldn't pay it if you couldn't see DD, but she might not want to risk that.

I'm not going to berate you as others have done, suffice to say that the best way to redeem yourself is to tell the truth and behave honourably from now on.

Ellapaella · 05/02/2017 14:19

You have to tell your wife and daughter. It will come out in the wash - these things always do, does your wife not question where the money you are paying in child support is going? And if it's in your will then of course your family will find out - how awful it would be if they found this out after you died and never got the chance to ask you about it. I'm not being judgemental or trying to give you a hard time but it is so selfish to keep this to yourself. You won't be the first man to do this nor the last - everyone will come to terms with it eventually. If I was your wife and put in this position I would obviously be devastated but I would want to know and not want your other daughter excluded from my daughters life. You really do just need to face up to this and take ownership of what's happened - the longer you keep it quiet the worse the fall out will be.

P1nkP0ppy · 05/02/2017 14:23

Is the affair ongoing? Are you financially supporting your young daughter?
I can't believe you're travelling to Poland every couple of months and your wife is unsuspecting.
I think you need to own up pdq, you're still cheating on your wife and she deserves to know just who she's married to - a deceitful, cheating and lying OH ☹️

seven201 · 05/02/2017 14:27

Sorry not read the whole thread but if you include your polish daughter in your will (you should) then it would be much worse if it all came out after you were dead. Tell your wife then tell your English daughter.

Ferrisday · 05/02/2017 14:30

If you died and they found out, they would never be able to believe anything you said.
Never believe that you loved them and would always wonder exactly how much was lies.

Please tell them

ememem84 · 05/02/2017 14:40

I'm not sure I would want my dad to tell me I had another sister. I think I'd resent him for it.

Having said that I don't think I'd want to find out after he died either. Knowing he kept that a secret from me would ruin the relationship.

QODRestYeMerryGentlemen · 05/02/2017 14:42

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EyeSaidTheFly · 05/02/2017 14:45

Something similar to this happened in my family.

I want you to know that am not here to judge you.

In this case my uncle had a daughter and he didn't all the rest of his family about her. we are a close family and some of us knew about her and some of us didn't.

it was painful for all of us. the ones of us who knew were being forced to keep secrets from the those who didn't. we all worried about their reactions when they eventually found out and whether they'd be angry with us even though we were only children who had been told to keep our other cousin a secret.

eventually the cousins who didn't know found out - one of the cousins who did know told them a couple of years ago. The cousins who didn't know were hurt with us, even though they loved us and didn't understand why they had never been told. it was actually all their family unit who were not told ie their parents too and my uncle's sibling, who he typically got on with very well. they were all understandably distressed and bewildered.

I have no advice for you, OP. I think you are in a very difficult position and I have a lot of sympathy for you. I think that other posters are being unkind to you but that the situation is much more nuanced than they like to admit. just giving you a massive kicking is so unhelpful - and so much the easy option.

I know exactly what keeping a secret like this is like - as I was forced to keep my uncle's secret for so long. it makes one terribly anxious.

I don't hate my uncle at all even though he was the one who put us through this. I have spoken to him about it and, if i'm honest, he hasn't really acknowledged what it cost us (the anxiety and the lying, and the fear of losing our cousins' love) or could have cost us (by which I mean my own close relationship with the cousins who didn't know, if they had chosen to be angry with us for keeping the secret too). He would say he had no choice, even though he obviously did. i don't think he particularly feels guilty and sometimes that makes me feel quite angry with him!

What I acknowledge about my uncle is this: that he really got himself into a pickle and the longer he left it, the more impossible it became to tell the other cousins. the reason he didn't tell them, I think, is because our cousin was illegitimate and the uncle he didn't tell had mh problems. He was worried that the uncle was too vulnerable to be able to keep the secret from our granny and then she'd find out and she'd be devastated. but when she died he just didn't tell my uncle and it kept dragging on. I still really love him though, and of all the uncles he is my favourite. But we have always enjoyed a good relationship and I was the only cousin to confront him after the news came out. his brother never did - they have to my knowledge never discussed it (mind boggling) and that sort of makes me think that maybe not telling him while granny was alive wasn't the wrong thing.

My uncle wasn't married to anyone, so didn't cheat like you did. he was in a much less complicated position than you. he always acknowledged his daughter and paid maintenance for her and was a signficant part of her life. they have a good relationship. he had no other children so much less complicated than you.

From my cousin's point of view i don't think it was great for her to grow up knowing she had cousins who didn't know about her. it was damaging to her, although she is a wonderful person and was a fantastic child. both she and the cousins she didn't know have missed out hugely knowing each other and that is something which can't be replaced. they love each other now but aren't particularly close because they all have their own lives and they were adults when they met.

fortunately my own anxiety about what woudl happen to my cousins relationship with me was misplaced and we are still as close as ever. they also still love the uncle who kept the secret from them, although they are saddened and puzzled by it. it's something that we all talk about together now, and I mean all of us including the cousin who was not known.

from my point of view I am less concerned about your wife, although obviously I don't envy her. Like you, i'd be so worried about both your daughters not knowing each other. I have no advice because I feel that the arguments are actually very powerful both ways. If you continue to keep the secret whilst you are alive, then yes both your wife and your daughter will really struggle with your death - it will be so much the worse for them. they'll never get the chance to process it with you, which is what they deserve. and, most importantly to me, your daughters may never get to know each other in a meaningful way. but if you tell them and you really feel that there is a risk that they may simply not wish to know the little girl, then what is the point? it sounds like your marriage is not emotionally intimate, and again I make no judgement, because there are loads out there which are relationships of convenience and suit each party just fine. i too am struck by your wife saying that she'd rather not know if you were having an affair - that, for me at least, is very telling.

For one, I have been impressed with your replies so far - because it strikes me that you are not trying to shirk your responsibility but face up to it and do the right thing, whatever that is. that's certainly more than my uncle was capable of. this can only bode well if you do chose to tell them.

I do not think that you are a coward because it takes real strength to carry on as you have done with this dreadful secret (albeit of your own making) and I think that you are genuinely worried about hurting your wife and daughter and want to protect them for that.

If you do chose not to tell them (and I'm inclined to think I wouldn't) I'd leave a letter for them with your will explaining your reasoning. It's not fair and it's not really good enough, but I don't think it's ok just to leave them with the will and no explanation.

the only thing I do feel strongly about is that under no circumstances should you cut your little daughter off. she may have some hard questions for you in the future but she needs to know that her daddy loves her and it sounds like she loves and values you too. My cousin and my uncle have benefited hugely from having each other in their lives. I think your younger daughter needs to know that you are not ashamed of her and that she is valued by her daddy.

Like your older daughter, I am also a feminist.

Fanciedachange17 · 05/02/2017 14:49

Mumofdragon I agree my post was coldly dispassionate and I'm probably wrong.

Breezy1985 · 05/02/2017 15:23

My dad had secret children, they're now 10 and 12, I'm 31. I have a relationship with my younger half siblings, they live an hour away though so slightly easier and they are more or less the same age as my DCs, I have nothing to do with my dad, I just have no respect for him.

NotMyPenguin · 05/02/2017 17:20

I would tell the truth and let the chips fall as they will. You sound as if this has really been weighing on you heavily. Wouldn't it be a relief to be honest?

Your little daughter stands to gain the rest of her family (your side) and a dad who is openly proud of her.

Your adult daughter may be upset (although I am her age and wouldn't be upset if my dad told me this -- however, I would be terribly upset to find after his death that he had kept it a secret from me) but ultimately may admire you for telling the truth even though it's difficult.

Your wife is likely to be devastated. If your marriage is a deal-breaker, this may be the only good reason not to say anything. But ultimately the longer you keep this secret, the more secret damage exists at the heart of your relationship with your wife anyway. By getting it out in the open you would at least be able to tackle it openly and try to get past it.

In your heart of hearts, do you want to stay in your marriage?

SparklyUnicornPoo · 05/02/2017 17:39

I agree that you owe your wife and your english daughter the truth but I think you've also missed out what you owe your Polish daughter. I have an older half brother (same Dad, different Mums) who didn't know about me and my other siblings til I was 13, and we didn't know about him, I would have loved to have grown up knowing him. We are close now and he hasn't spoken to my Dad in 15 years because he resents the lies too. So I think you owe it to your Polish daughter to come clean as well.

PollytheDolly · 05/02/2017 17:43

If you don't tell the truth now it will be a whole lot harder 10, 20, 30 yrs time for all concerned. Your involved with your polish daughter who is 5. When she gets older you will have no control of what she decides in regards to you, her half sister, etc.

Bite the bullet.

tedrekasta · 05/02/2017 18:55

Thank you everyone. It's kind of you to take the time to help me.

Though I feel confused. Some of you suggest telling my wife and daughter. And some suggest not telling them and living with the terrible guilt.

One of you asked why the Polish lady is so angry with me. It's embarrassing for me to tell you the truth. She thinks I am a total wimp. And she hates it. When I go to visit my daughter in Poland her mother will often be furious with me for trivial reasons. But she explained recently that she expected me to come back at her and then the whole thing would be over and done with in a few moments.

Instead of which, when she is angry with me I just get miserable and in her words 'sulky'. I just cannot cope with angry people.

She (the mother) says I am not a man in her eyes and she finds it infuriating. She believes a real man would have the courage to up sticks and move to Poland to be near to my daughter. And even to try and form a relationship with her (the mother).

I am not that person. All my life I have been called weak. Even by my wife on several occasions. And certainly by my father.

So, perhaps that explains one aspect of this horrendous problem I have caused. My weakness probably was a big part of me not saying 'no' to going into her hotel room. I was rather terrified as well as being flattered.

A lifetime of not being seen as attractive and of being seen as a nobody has worn down any sense of worth in me.

One of you asked why I didn't have a condom. Really? Me? An ugly old man who women never notice. Why on earth would I carry a condom around with me. I am not that delusional!

Anyway. Some of you gave me 'tough love' and some of you showed kindness and understanding.

I still have no idea what to do. But you have given me a lot to think about.

Thank you again

OP posts:
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