explaining gay sex

[BelleateSebastian]

My nearly 10 year old ds has just asked me how 2 men can have sex bloody Coronation street I explained the sex thing to him a couple of years ago, I subtly cowardly changed the subject, but I could see he was pondering the 'mechanics' he then seemed to have a 'light bulb' moment and hit the nail on the head, I confirmed he was correct, he didn't seem particularly perturbed and has gone to bed to finish Gangsta Granny!

Has anyone else had this question at such a young age? I feel like the very basics of sex is enough at 10 but it seems like everything is happening younger nowadays

Now I am confused Eat Because I thought it had been decided that gay men went for 8 year old boys in the loos in Carnaby Street.

EatShitDerek - that is offensive and outrageous if that is what Nigella was suggesting (and might well be given the later posts).

I read it as - blokes sometimes have sex with eachother in public toilets, that is a grim thing for a kid to come across when going for a wee, hence wouldn't let a young kid use public loos on their own particularly in certain places.

Not anything to do with paedophiles.

But maybe I got the wrong impression...

Yes, your usual MO, Nigella, is to come out with ill-informed, offensive bollocks then play the "oh golly, I'm so sorry but don't be mean to me" card.
Get a life.

I don't think that's what Nigella meant, actually. I think she meant that she'd already explained the mechanics of buggery (which happens to be how [some] gay men have sex) because she was worried about paedophiles attacking her son in a public loo. NOT that gay men are paedophiles who would attack her son.

I don't think we should keep deleting threads when something offensive has been said. I think it's good that we can see those views are challenged.

How some people have sex, JacPeacock. Not exclusively homosexual men.

And I found it an offensive comment, but I don't think we should censor everything

No, not exclusively gay men. I didn't say it was, I don't think.

I think you have all massively over reacted here

Nigella explained to her son that se didn't want to send him into public toilets because some men like to have interfere with little boys, that is not the same as saying all gay men are peadophiles.

Fwiw I know plenty of gay men who have had sordid sex in public toilets although none that have done do with minors.

Also I'm gay and not offended but u would like to point out that many lesbians enjoy anal sex too

herrena no she didn't. She used it as a way to explain men have sex in toilets.

Also I'm gay and not offended but u would like to point out that many lesbians enjoy anal sex too

Oh well thanks for that. It's nice to know, although not really relevant HH.

I would feel very uncomfortable with this thread being deleted for the reasons cited by Mintyy. The homophobia - which it is - is quite awful and should be challenged.

Most child abuse (inc. sexual) takes place within the family/close friends setting. FACT. I understand the fear of stranger danger given media treatment of such cases, but I hate the distortion of reality that this brings.

Anyhow There is plenty of anal sex in straight relationships too. And plenty of gay men (as someone said) don't have anal sex. Think I would probably say something along the lines that "sex" is much more than "intercourse". Shame more men were not brought up to understand that .

My experience is that kids just want a truthful answer and then move on...no less innocent for the honesty btw. In an age appropriate way of course...

He knows about same sex relationships and always has, I think it all of a sudden just popped in his head 'how' do they do it? so, yes he would be traumatised by finding 2 men shagging in the Carnaby street (!) toilets, he would be equally shocked at finding a man and a woman shagging!

no that was not really what i meant - we know plenty of normal gay men as friends.

Nigella en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cottaging

Defending Nigella (a bit)
Lots of cases where children are abused in toilets. Both male and female ones. In men's toilets more likely to be attacked by a man - so a paedophile but one who prefers boys rather than girls - which makes him a homosexual paedophile...not all homosexuals are paedophiles - not all paedophiles are homosexual... without bringing in male homosexuality how do you explain it to an 8 yo?
Like Herrena says - the other thing that would worry me is not being attacked but by witnesses/hearing something I would rather an 8 yo didn't. There is even a term for it - cottaging -and the reason for lots of public loos (in quieter locations) are being closed after dark etc.
(And I also used to know a gay bloke who was fond of stranger sex in public toilets ....)

Okay, there's no desire here to sweep things under the carpet, so we will leave it, with the assumption that the discussion will remain civil etc etc etc.

As much as I usually like nigella i think you're grasping at straws a bit there unlucky