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Original poster

rang child protection services about ds

309 replies

beansontoast · 24/05/2006 14:46

....social worker just rang me back...thinks there are grounds to investigate further.

im in proper full on shock...not as bad as last night,but still shaking abit and i feel like its happening to someone else...a bit detached...functioning but not with it....

my ds...three this sept...was creepily sexually expilicit last night .i wont sya what he said cos im feeling cautious.

something about the context ,manner...his choice of words...his choice of verb...immediately waved a red flag for me.oh god i feel so so sick.

OP posts:
Original poster
beansontoast · 24/05/2006 15:57

......there has always been a little speck of doubt in my mind...but because i tended to be a bit protective when ds was [even]younger,i made an effort to 'put things in perspective'...ie think that most people dont do those things....

infact i even turned it into a positive that there was more than one adult caring for the children...

OP posts:
Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 24/05/2006 16:03

Sorry to read this beansontoast Sad How awful for you.

EvesMama · 24/05/2006 16:04

sorry if this has already been said, or if you dont want to go into it..but has it happend at nursery or somewhere?

Spagblog · 24/05/2006 16:04

Poor you, this must be terrifying. I would expect that at this age he will have no memories of the event at all.
So positive that "it" has been caught now. But so Sad that it may have happened at all.

pegasus · 24/05/2006 16:08

Keep posting - it will help you so that you can be strong for him. Thinking of you.

happybebe · 24/05/2006 16:11

beans Sad i hope it turns out to be nothing xx

Original poster
beansontoast · 24/05/2006 16:18

im only doing details of what is in my head im afraid...im feeling a bit vulnerable...and also i dont want to taint anyones opinion of teh kind of service where i think it happened....all ill say ..oh wise wise me...is trust your gut gut gut instinct no matter how faint...Sad

i really want to cry...fully sob ...but the feeling sort of comes tehn goes before i get a chance to really sob...its like when i cry my head/body syas 'but this isnt really happening' so i stop

OP posts:
EvesMama · 24/05/2006 16:26

i think i can get from what youve said some of the circumstances..are ss investigating them now?, have they spoken to them?

JackieNo · 24/05/2006 16:28

Beansontoast, thinking of you Sad.

Lact8 · 24/05/2006 16:28

Oh beansontoast, this is an horrendous situation for you, don't really know what to say...

You sound like you're holding it together for your ds at the moment, you're being really brave

This is awful for you both Sad

Piffle · 24/05/2006 16:33

Have you got soneone close you can lean on for some support beans?

peasinapod · 24/05/2006 16:34

Hello beanson toast I am really really sorry to hear what you are going through I think this is every parents nightmare . I hope you get the answers you are looking for so you know what you are dealing with . Keep strong and I pray you get the support you deserve .

Original poster
beansontoast · 24/05/2006 16:38

gosh thanks again everyone....

yes,piffle i have dp,two parents and a sis...all pulling the right faces and maikng the right noises....thankfully.

its so good to post while im waiting for teh soc worker to call me back though.

OP posts:
dublindee · 24/05/2006 16:43

beans - just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and your little ds, can't imagine what you're going thru (and being selfish about my ds - don't ever want to have to). Hope you find answers and everything works out for you both. {hug}

spacedonkey · 24/05/2006 16:57

Very, very sorry to hear this beans Sad

I hope social services are able to offer you, ds and your family lots of support. Also as others have suggested, there are other sources of support which might be helpful while you're waiting the seeming eternity that it takes soc services to provide support - the NSPCC has a free helpline with trained counsellors, I expect Childline could offer similar help.

Good luck x

alexsmum · 24/05/2006 17:25

what a nightmare ! thinking of you beansSadx

glassofwine · 24/05/2006 17:32

Beansontoast, like everyone else I'm thinking of you, have DS slightly older and just can't imagine how you are feeling. Sounds like you are doing the right thing and whilst I'm in no way sympathetic towards whatever has happened at least he's v. little and you've made sure it'll never happen again. Good luck

Elibean · 24/05/2006 17:49

Oh Beans....what an utter nightmare. I'm so sorry, my dd is 2.5 and I can't begin to imagine what you're going through. FWIW, you are definitely doing all the right things possible...and (if this does turn out to be as bad as you fear, though god I hope it doesn't) that will count for an enormous amount in the long run. Thinking of you.

pegasus · 24/05/2006 18:03

Could there be other children involved?

stitch · 24/05/2006 18:09

Shock and Sad
lots of positive vibes for you and yours.

Alipiggie · 24/05/2006 18:13

Just seen this. My heart goes out to you. for you an ds

Ledodgyherring · 24/05/2006 18:17

Oh God, what a truly awful situation for you and your ds. I really don't know what to say apart from hoping it isn't what you think. Sad

blueteddy · 24/05/2006 18:18

Oh, how awful for you, beans.Sad My heart goes out to you.xxxx

kama · 24/05/2006 18:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

earthtomummy · 24/05/2006 18:21

Oh Beansontoast, what a nightmare situation to be in. I hope that your DS and you and DP get lots of support to get through this. Thinking of you.