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Original poster

My kids got baby-bell wax all over my mother in laws new sofa.

438 replies

jennan · 29/12/2023 23:00

Hey,
I'm not really sure how to use this website so apologies if wrong.
So I'm at my mother in laws house for Xmas and she had just brought herself this VERY expensive sofa for herself as a self gift.
she has just had it delivered today and its a brand new white sofa, as I have two boys (6 and 7) I told them not to go on it but my mother in law INSISTED they could go on it.
they had just finished watching TV and were getting ready for bed when my husband alerted me to the fact that someone had obviously eaten a baby-bell and than somehow sat on the wax, there is now a VERY noticeable red patch on the sofa.
I have removed the excess wax but there is still a stain.
my boys and mother in law are in bed now but I dont know how to remove it.
me and my husband dont have the money to replace this sofa and my mother in law doesn't really like me as it is.
Does anyone know how to remove cheese wax from a sofa?
Thanks.

OP posts:
icallitasplodge · 30/12/2023 15:42

It’s too late now but I work in a furniture shop.

when she bought the sofa there will be a warranty, this may be 2 years if the place she bought it from is generous.

they will send someone out, she can either pretend it was like it (naughty) and they will fix it for a charge (not massive amount probably, £100?)

if she has paid for guardsman insurance then it’ll be covered.

however. IF you fuck about with it and make it worse with an iron, you have invalidated all of the above and are liable for the lot.

icallitasplodge · 30/12/2023 15:43

Apologies

they will send someone out, she can either pretend it was like it (naughty) and they will fix for free - or they’ll call it accidental damage and fix it for a charge (not massive amount probably, £100?)

gnarlynarwhal · 30/12/2023 16:12

I’ve just seen a video on YouTube where a guy removes it from a cream coloured carpet. He uses a piece of folded tissue paper and an iron. You have to do it quite a few times to get the wax off. There was a slight red stain left afterwards and he said to use carpet cleaner to get the remaining stain off. Can you try that OP.

She refused to go to your wedding? She sounds like a bit of a cow then to be honest so I would just remove what you can and then just feign all knowledge of it.

Original poster
jennan · 30/12/2023 16:12

OrlandointheWilderness · 30/12/2023 12:56

How it gone OP?!

This is going to be long 😬.
We managed to get all of the wax of the sofa but there was still a red stain.
Mil had woke up before us and noticed the stain so I was greeted with a VERY angry mil telling me of for bringing baby bells and saying I should have just brought crips or biscuits (I brought my own snacks for the boys as she mainly has ingredients with the exception of some biscuits and chocolates but I didn't just want them eating biscuits and sweet stuff the whole time)
I offered to pay for a cleaner or a new cover but she just got even more annoyed saying that it was a massive inconvenience for her and that if I were to order a new cover it wouldn't come quickly enough for this evening (Later this evening my sister and brother in law were coming with there partners and children for a mini-reunion as we didn't get to see them on Christmas as they were both busy.)
My MIL told me the argument that I was no longer invited to the reunion but my husband and sons were still invited but I wasn't????
I told her that if I was not going then neither were my boys, my MIL got quite pissy saying that it would be unfair to my nephews as they were looking forward to seeing my sons.
My DH went out quite early to meet some of his childhood friends as he grew up here and because of that he missed our argument.
I've just got home with my boys and I've just received a text from my dh telling me that his mum explained the whole situation to him and that me not letting the boys go was very immature.
I have to pick him up on Monday and apparently, my mil is very upset about her grandsons not being there and wants to talk to me before we leave.
Was I in the wrong?

OP posts:
Heyhoherewegoagain · 30/12/2023 16:17

I think come Monday I’d be delivering his clothes etc to his mum’s house

uclpp · 30/12/2023 16:18

on what planet does a husband allow his wife to be ejected like this? What a prick

DontPutTheKidsThroughIt · 30/12/2023 16:20

Of course you’re not in the wrong. Your mother in law is insane. White fabric sofas and kids don’t mix. Which you knew. And she told them to sit on it anyway. Kids, sofas and snacks are always dicey. She told them to stand up next to the sofa and eat. Anyone with primary aged kids would consider that a trap and not a helpful rule. The kids stained the sofa. And she’s blaming you for buying them healthy snacks?
Your husband should have left in solidarity with you.

SmileyClare · 30/12/2023 16:21

Of course you weren’t wrong. You offered a solution.

Your dh is a coward for sneaking off before anyone got up (?) and he’s an arsehole for taking his mums side, going to this reunion without you and not backing you up.

I would not be going back to pick him up on Monday.

Unexpecteddrivinginstructor · 30/12/2023 16:21

Why is dh not shouldering equal responsibility for his dc behaviour? Why are the dc who actually put the babybell there not accountable? I would be highlighting this to dh and MIL.

clara778 · 30/12/2023 16:21

Yes you were wrong, you will always be wrong!!

Pack the car, including the boys and leave him to it.
Switch off your phone.

But I agree with PP, laughing about it was pretty shitty.

KissTheRains · 30/12/2023 16:23

jennan · 30/12/2023 16:12

This is going to be long 😬.
We managed to get all of the wax of the sofa but there was still a red stain.
Mil had woke up before us and noticed the stain so I was greeted with a VERY angry mil telling me of for bringing baby bells and saying I should have just brought crips or biscuits (I brought my own snacks for the boys as she mainly has ingredients with the exception of some biscuits and chocolates but I didn't just want them eating biscuits and sweet stuff the whole time)
I offered to pay for a cleaner or a new cover but she just got even more annoyed saying that it was a massive inconvenience for her and that if I were to order a new cover it wouldn't come quickly enough for this evening (Later this evening my sister and brother in law were coming with there partners and children for a mini-reunion as we didn't get to see them on Christmas as they were both busy.)
My MIL told me the argument that I was no longer invited to the reunion but my husband and sons were still invited but I wasn't????
I told her that if I was not going then neither were my boys, my MIL got quite pissy saying that it would be unfair to my nephews as they were looking forward to seeing my sons.
My DH went out quite early to meet some of his childhood friends as he grew up here and because of that he missed our argument.
I've just got home with my boys and I've just received a text from my dh telling me that his mum explained the whole situation to him and that me not letting the boys go was very immature.
I have to pick him up on Monday and apparently, my mil is very upset about her grandsons not being there and wants to talk to me before we leave.
Was I in the wrong?

Show quote history

Holy crap....

Just in this one post, there's enough here for me to go Fuck That Shit.. id be dumping OH in about 5 seconds.
Pissing off out - strike one.
Not telling MIL himself - strike two
Not standing up for you - strike 3
Not telling MIL he is as much to blame as anyone for not watching HIS kids - strike 4
Having a go at you - Strike E ..

Thats like.. several strikes..

HES OUT OF THERE..

Disclaimer: I have zero tolerance for shit like this. If my partner doesn't have MY back, they don't get my anything.

MrsMiddleMother · 30/12/2023 16:24

Hope you and your sons have a great weekend! Do something fun just the 3 of you. Your MIL and dh are dicks and she can bring him home on Monday. It was an accident, it happens and both you and your dh are responsible for your children so just you getting the blame is disgusting. And no way is it immature leaving your own children in a house that you yourself isn't welcome in.

AngelaAnacondaHeyHello · 30/12/2023 16:24

Heyhoherewegoagain · 30/12/2023 16:17

I think come Monday I’d be delivering his clothes etc to his mum’s house

And dumping the lot on the sofa.

Growlybear83 · 30/12/2023 16:26

I'm afraid I think you were in the wrong from the outset. You and your husband should have supervised your children and made sure they did not eat on the new sofa, as your mother in law instructed. And having let them eat snacks that you had taken with you, the very least you could have done is made sure that they didn't sit on the wax wrapper and stain the sofa, but instead you seem to have found it amusing from your use of emojis in your earlier posts. If you had that attitude when you saw your mother in law this morning, it's not surprising that she was really angry. I agree with your husband that it was very immature to say your sons could not stay for the reunion without you, and you're punishing them for your lack of supervision and respect for your mother in law's property. I also think it's dreadful that your husband didn't have the decency to speak to his mother about the damage before he went out. I can't help feeling that there must be quite a backstory that you haven't disclosed that has led to such a bad relationship with your mother in law.

ChangeNameLikeIChangeSocks · 30/12/2023 16:27

Your husband says YOU'RE childish?

Wow.

AtrociousCircumstance · 30/12/2023 16:27

She sounds like a nightmare and your H is being lilylivered - but you should have been watching those kids.

thebestinterest · 30/12/2023 16:28

Your MIL is an idiot, OP.

EVERYONE knows that if you care about a piece of furniture you should protect it, SPECIALLY with kids around! 😭 she’s a mum… she knows this???

I’ve a really nice cream couch in my house I haven’t actually gotten to enjoy because I have cats and a baby, so it has ALWAYS been covered 😭

SmileyClare · 30/12/2023 16:28

I wonder if her other grandchildren arriving tonight will fair any better with the white sofa. 😬

Or the adults for that matter.

I once leaked blood sitting on my friend’s white chairs. It was mortifying but she was lovely about it and reassured me later that she’d cleaned it and these things happen.

I must admit it’s a weird turnaround for your dh. Last night helping you get the stain out, even driving to Morrisons at midnight. Today he doesn’t want to know and agrees with banning you from the house?

I would find that hard to forgive.

SecondUsername4me · 30/12/2023 16:30

Why is your MIL laying all the blame for the mess on you and not the kids other parent too?

Oh, that's right, because she hates you.

Your dh needs to back you up here.

gnarlynarwhal · 30/12/2023 16:30

So she’s had her chance to have her say and your DH has just taken her word for it and not stuck up for you. She sounds horrible and your DH sounds like he can’t stand up to his mother.

TripleDaisySummer · 30/12/2023 16:32

I've just got home with my boys and I've just received a text from my dh telling me that his mum explained the whole situation to him and that me not letting the boys go was very immature.

I'd text back -you clearly have no idea what you mother said to me at all - UNFORGIVABLE - I will not be ferry you round Monday - frankly I'm done with your mother behavior and frankly your on short notice as well.

Then if he rings get angry very angry at him.

MIL only pulling stuns like exclusion because he's not had your back for years by the sounds of it - I refused early to be exclude and DH backed that - I didn't get initially the backing I always wanted but he'd never have allowed this - mind you I'd have put my foot firmly down about letting them on the white sofa in first place and if I'd been overruled thrown that back at her and DH - this was an avoidable problem - and not foreseeing baby bell food staining wasn't the obvious prevention step - not having kids on there was.

TooOldForThisNonsense · 30/12/2023 16:32

Of course you were in the wrong letting kids eat Babybels without taking the wax off them on what you knew was a new and expensive couch. When you have small kids yourself you do get used to them trashing everything but you stop getting used to it once they get bigger. We used to give our kids babybels but the was was always getting everywhere so we took them out the wrappers first.

I think your MIL is being ridiculous about the gathering mind you but of course letting them eat Babybel on the sofas without proper supervision was a stupid thing to do.

if you had been the person whose sofa was spoiled in this way the kids would have been getting called all the feral brats under the sun on here.

Goldbar31 · 30/12/2023 16:32

Firstly, who in their right mind purchases a white sofa when they intend on hosting their grandchildren.

Secondly, ditch the husband. This is your life to live. You don’t get discarded when something isn’t to MIL’s taste.

TooOldForThisNonsense · 30/12/2023 16:35

Sorry so yes you were in the wrong about the original incident but your husband and his mum are also arseholes.

TripleDaisySummer · 30/12/2023 16:36

alerted me to the fact that someone had obviously eaten a baby-bell and than somehow sat on the wax,

That doesn't sound like OP let the kids eat baby bell on the sofa - sounds like she was unaware and frankly not the only parent or adult who should have been supervising - (and kids who didn't follow the instructions given as well).