This is a VERY sensitive subject, I know, but I am curious to know just how big a problem this is

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

How many people on here have been assaulted/raped and have either reported or not reported it?

I found out that the conviction rate rapes was just 6% . 6% of reported rapes. There are many many many more that go unreported. I want to know roughly what kind of figure we are looking at. Please change your name if need be, but do post.....

I'll start..

Me - unreported.

3 instances I didn't report - for a variety of reasons.

One prolonged one I did, and it led to years of hell for me and my family. Had to cut myself off from a lot of my life (and friends) as a result. Not sure I'd recommend reporting it. I am a strong person and had a lot of support, but dealing with the aftermath of reporting has had potentially greater negative longer term effects on me than the incidents themselves.

I was assulted on a bus when I was about 17 and I didn't report it, infact I never told anyone.

I wasn't going to post on this thread, as I didn't think I had.

I've had some near misses where I've had to get very firm with blokes and threaten to scream, or have managed to get away before any thing happened.

But then when I thought about it, I was regularly assaulted by my boss in my early 20's.(Although I did slap him once, it didn't put him off - but I didn't loose my job either.)

I'm going to take a risk now and say he is a well known figure, who is currently being investigated for sexual assualt, so he obviously hasn't changed his ways.

I didn't report them.

Dubious experience with a male gp - don't want to go into detail.

Dislocated some-one's finger who tried to touch me up.

My grandmother born as a result of rape & other family members have experienced rape.

My father went to see an young employee who was in hospital after an assault, thinking he had just been beaten up. He had been kidnapped with a friend, held for 2 days and horrifically sexually assaulted & tortured by an Eastern European gang.

What this thread has shown me is how prevalent it is. I thought the few examples that touched my life, were just that, a few. Am vowing to teach my son & daughter the techniques I know and plan to send them to kick-ass self-defence classes.

Unreported. I was 15.

Name-changed for this one.

My ex-bf sexually assualted me on various occasions (hassling me for sex when I was asleep etc - calling me frigid when we dated as I wouldn't jump into bed with him) and yesterday he carried on against my will after I asked him to stop "just a few more pumps" and he insulted me on holiday last week by wanting to have a 3-some with a prostitute when I said I'd had enough and was leaving him.

I won't report though (the not-stopping sex/rape) as it'll be his word against mine. Absolutely no point.

I did go outside and scream he was a rapist after he pushed me out of the door though (he thought I'd banged it on purpose after a row and I hadnt) - not entirely proud of that but it's done now.

.

attempted abduction by 2 men, reported, both charged, never went to court.

yes - raped when I was 11 - not reported to police.

unreported
many times
ex husband

Me - never my mum unreported had my sister!

Margehasbluehair what a C**t do not takle him back!

I was touched up by a male doctor when I was on work experience as a 16 yo in a local hospital. I was supposed to be shadowing him and he took me to his flat to 'pick up the post' and he offered to teach me how to listen to my own heart with a stethoscope. He insisted I needed to take my top off and then he had a good root around in my bra, whilst 'showing' me what to do. I was too embarrassed to say no in case I'd got the wrong end of the stick and his motives were entirely innocent

I happen to know that he's now a Consultant Obstetrician and Gynaecologist

and for all of you. I am another 'lucky' one who has never been assulted. I just really can't believe that so many have experienced it.

Stay strong. x

Me --unreported ,I was 17 and it was with an ex who I had let stay over .

I only ever told one person about it and he turned it all round onto me so I don't think or talk about it much now .

Me - unreported. Work colleague with the help of some rohypnol or similar.
Have told a few people but not worth the judgy-ness.

raped many many times by ex partner and never reported them.

i have sat on jury service for a rape trial some years back and i would never ever report a rape unless it was a stranger attack and he left "evedence"

what that woman went through was barbaric and in my mind probably worse than the actual rape itself.

but on the other hand women who cry rape and make flase accusations are teh ones i hate most. they make it harder for ever real victim to be heard nd believed. they should spend many years in prison if it is found to be a false accusation.

oh christ have just remembered being assaulted by our family doctor who forced me to be examined for breast lumps and a smear test. I had gone in for a sore throat and cough. I just froze and did what he asked as he was very clever at how he did it. Only after did I realise what was going on.
Also a friend told me about a guy she knew who was learning massage and asked if I wanted a free back massage at his hairdressers. He felt me up and pulled the towel over my bottom and my knickers way down and started to masturbate through his trousers. I got the hell out if there. Later the friend said he did the same to her way before. Thanks for telling me and leading me to him.

never. It seems I am one of the lucky ones

me - unreported (for obvious reasons). Groomed and fondled as a child by a (female) second-cousin whom I loved dearly and idolised. I later discovered that she had been abused by her own father and so I think she was trying to work though what had happened to her. I do look at other cousins and wonder whether she did the same to them or if I just attract that sort.

me- unreported. In an abusive relationship. He was the only person I told about my second cousin - I think it gave him ideas - he would often throw it back in my face and get excited by it. (I will never ever tell anybody else) His worst was when I tried to physically fight back.

me - reported (but only a year later when his stalking started to scare the hell out of me). My ex-best-friend's husband at a drunken party groped and tried to snog me. I was horrified because I hadn't seen it coming and realised I had opened myself up to it because I was having a tough time and spent a lot of time crying on his and her shoulder etc... Felt v v stupid because I should have learnt my lesson by then!

Sister - unreported (to the police, but family now know). Gang raped at 13 by her boyfriend and his mates when she refused to have an adult relationship with him. It took her five years, a drug addiction, and two suicide attempts to tell us what had happened.

seeing it all written there is horrible. I shall be changing my name now (I thought I was strong enough not to need to name-change)

I have namechanged- I was assaulted quite badly by a doctor at a maries stopes clinic in southeast. I was getting a termination, so felt I deserved it. He knew that no women going for a termination would ever complain.
A disgusting breach of trust working for that organisation.

marypoppins < hugs >

don't name-change, what happened is not your fault

nor are any of the other terribly sad and often horrific stories told here

tooprivate, the same goes for you (and everybody)