Getting bored with MumsNetters who ...

[Mulanmum]

Leave their 2 or 3 or 4 or 5 kids to cuddle each other and play harmoniously whilst they come onto this topic to tell us that only children are:

spoiled/spoilt
likely to prefer their chaotic household to the sad and lonely bleakhouse inhabited by an only child
will be lost and lonely without the comradeship of sibs when parents die

and that they have never met an adult who enjoyed being an only child

and on and on and on!

It isn't helpful for those who, unlike me, would have liked to have more children.

I don't go sticking my nose into the Larger Families topics posting tactless and unhelpful comments about children I know who LOATHE being one of TOO many or adults who DETEST their brothers/sisters.

Supportive and constructive posts are welcome from multi-kid mums but if you can't manage that then please get back to your kids and stop little Jasper hammering on little Jocasta's head.

Thank you

Righty-ho

You are a tetchy mummy aren't you? What kind of supportive/constructive posts do you want? And do you think that being so combative is the correct way to inspire support?

I think this topic is proving to be quite divisive.

I'm an only child. I hated it. I've met plenty though who say they loved it. So basically I'm going to sit on the fence for this one!

mulanmum - what exactly are you hoping to achieve by starting a separate thread about this? The way a lot of threads on here have developed has been a problem - I really don't think that this is going to be the solution.

WHere are these comments? Couldn't you comment on them at the time? The tone of your op is only going to cause a fight.

Never seen them myself, on here or in RL.

This topic just seems to be encouraging people to be huffy.

Surely everyone was the parent of only one child at some point (barring those who had multiple births).

But then I don't see the necessity of this topic anyway - especially with all the stroppiness it's causing.

(and yes I have only one child myself).

I would think an OP like that is more likely to get people's backs up. Why not just address any comments you feel are unsupportive as and when they occur on whichever thread you are on?

gosh

what an odd way to request "supportive and constructive posts".
And why are the children called Jasper and Jocasta - what is that dig all about?

i loved being an only child. i love a certain solitude that i think only only children know about - its a nice thing your own company

i am not sure what the ops problem is - i think the op is pissed off becuase they can't have more kids - so betting a bit bitter about those mums who do

am i right?

right now i have three kids and not one of them is called fucking jocasta or jasper , so stop infering we are all an mc stereotype for a start - mrs pot and kettle

and another thing

what the shit in shit reason on gods interweb, is this fucking topic in aid of?

i can see very very very few problems that onlies get uniquely

lets have one for
boys

no
another
girls

and

gender neutral

i don't see the point of this topic either

there arn't that many things that are different, they are still children

whats with the massive ad at the top of the page

or is that just my computer

Nice

I'll just give Jocasta a shout and tell her to twat Jasper back. Not sure it would work though as no-one living her is called that.

Oooh, is Mulanmummy at it again?

Run along now, there's a love

lurker see here re advert

custardo - you're completely wrong . I adopted my DD, never wanted to give birth, don't want any more and have no reason to be bitter.

What I don't understand and perhaps Armidillo and Lurker and Custardo and NotDoing could enlighten me is: if you don't think there is a need for this topic - why are you reading it and posting on it?

I think you are right mulanmum - in fact Im going to give 2 of my 3 away right now. The remaining one should be ok, shouldn't he??

Do you know what has surprised me most about the "contentiousness" of this topic?
It's that I really thought Mumsnet was different......I'm about to lose the anonymity I enjoy here on MN but to hell with it....I'm a moderator on the Only Children board of Babycentre...and for all the slagging off of Babycentre that I read on here, day in day out.....we have never not once, had the kind of bile spewed at us that I've read recently on these only child threads.

A very good friend of mine is a moderator on the Parents of 3, 4 or more board.....I don't go and snipe at her choices, I don't read her fucking board, it's got sod all to do with me......

It also makes me laugh, if a little wryly, that some of the names cropping up over and over on the let's-go-and-bash-the-onlies threads are the very people who are usually the ones to wear their highly polished NonJudgyPants badges with pride.

MulanMum and others.....there's a safe haven over in TickerTown if you ever feel like popping in.......

And Custardo- how utterly vile of you if it had been the case that MulanMum desperately wanted more children and couldn't have any.
Shame on you.

To be fair, I have never met an adult who was happy being an only child but then that only applies to my Dad and my DH. We have 2 kids because DH was adamant DD wouldn't be an only child (obv wouldn't be without DS now). Although I was quite happy only having one child.

"Supportive and constructive posts are welcome from multi-kid mums but if you can't manage that then please get back to your kids and stop little Jasper hammering on little Jocasta's head."

If this is the kind of attitude you have with regard to "multi-kid mums" then maybe you are better off sitting in this topic alone, as I for one do not find this statement "supportive or "constructive". Furthermore, I do not see why you think you have the right to dictate who posts where on a public forum, in the same way that us "multi kid mums" wouldn't tell you you can't post on any other topic involving more than one child.

And for the record, neither one of my kids is called Jasper or Jocasta.

She said that I presume because every bloody thread that has been started since this topic was introduced has been sabotaged by judgemental fvckwits.

Bucharest, the op was being particularly vile about those with more than one child, if she was bitter because she was unable to have more children, she should have thought of how her words might have been taken before she posted such vitriolic shite.

She isn't bitter...and most of the mothers of onlies that I know who cannot have any more children aren't bitter either...just very very sad......Seems to me the only people round here are bitter are those who are judging other people's choices.

And even those of us who have onlies by choice probably have it going through our minds at least 10 times a day if we are doing the right thing......

I have just one child, by choice, and have no regrets but then I also don't really care what hysterical types on the interweb think about my choices in life