Omg what do I do now?

[chocolatemuffin75]

I’ve been chatting to someone online for the past week, we have arranged to meet tomorrow, he’s just informed me he’s uploaded another photo of himself, as his others were not very clear and quite far away, my god he’s awful, I know looks aren’t everything but I just can’t meet him, Why couldn’t he have posted this one in the first place! He just looks so scruffy with a stubbly beard which I hate, his other photos are obviously older. How do I tell him I don’t wish to meet now? I feel a right cow but I just can’t meet him.

You owe him nothing.

Just make an excuse not to meet and then block and delete.

Glad I made you laugh 😀
Well I could meet him but I think he will still have his stubby beard as he’s just grown it, and he’s not going to take his earring out as he obviously likes it, and I wouldn’t want him to anyway as that’s who he is.

I would be honest. Say beards and ear rings on men are just not your thing. Sorry. (Just hope he doesn’t offer to shave).

Is he actually a pirate?

I don't think it's odd - that was my first reaction too.

We all have preferences don’t we?

He might be who knows 🤷‍♀️

We all want to know how he told you a lemon has more sugar than an orange 💀

Tell him, "Oh no,you look like my ex/brother/cousin/dad I'm sorry I can't do this"

Well we're never going to find out if you don't go on this date?

Or has he suggested you meet on a big boat or a parrot sanctuary?

Of course - and some preferences are more shallow than others.

Writing someone off as a potential partner because they wear an earring or their beard looks a certain way is more shallow than writing someone off because they are selfish or lazy for example.

Cancel and say you’ve met someone else
if you invent an illness you’ll have to invent a way to get out of a rescheduled date too

Don't meet him. Say that you've decided to take it further with another date, you've contacted your ex again, you don't like being untruthful, ghost him etc.

This.
It’s honest but polite. You are allowed to like different things to each other .

Would YOU meet someone you don't fancy?

Id probably be honest that beards and an earing arnt really your thing. Wish him best of luck and stop messaging

You're allowed to be shallow with dating - nobody wants to be with someone who doesn't fancy them because of their weird walk/scruffy hair/long toes but dated them.anyway so as not to appear shallow!

However, I'd feel rotten doing it right after he's given you the only clear photo of himself , poor guy! You'll have to go with something like "That new pic is a nice photo of you, you should send that one early on as you can't really see you properly in the others! have to admit though, the stubble and earring is really not my vibe and makes me think we probably aren't as compatible as I'd hoped. Wishing you all the best in your search."

If you are just meeting for coffee then go, you never know, and looks aren’t everything, just look at all those ugly old millionaires who keep finding stunning young women who love them dearly!

If the arrangement was for anything longer than a latte I think I might have an overnight attack of something either catching or terminal.

A male friend of mine who is 47 and newly single showed me his dating profile recently. He's used photographs from 6-7 years ago and he looks a lot older now. I encouraged him to use some newer photos but he got quite offended and said he still looked exactly the same just a bit more Gray hair. Sadly lots of people are deluded about how old they actually look.

Perhaps PPs haven't used online dating? It is shallow. You're basing your understanding of a stranger on superficial attributes they add to their profile.

I wouldn't meet him, OP. It's a waste of both your times. He should have uploaded a proper photo of himself from the beginning.

😂nothing ventured and all that...it'll get you out of the house for half an hour @chocolatemuffin75 😂

Shallow or not I wouldn’t meet someone who misrepresented himself. He knew what he was doing picking old photos.

Just tell him that now it's come down to it - it's hit you that you're simply not in the right head space to date ATM.