Omg what do I do now?

[chocolatemuffin75]

I’ve been chatting to someone online for the past week, we have arranged to meet tomorrow, he’s just informed me he’s uploaded another photo of himself, as his others were not very clear and quite far away, my god he’s awful, I know looks aren’t everything but I just can’t meet him, Why couldn’t he have posted this one in the first place! He just looks so scruffy with a stubbly beard which I hate, his other photos are obviously older. How do I tell him I don’t wish to meet now? I feel a right cow but I just can’t meet him.

Ah really awkward but you're right not to waste your or his time. Maybe text tomorrow with an excuse!

I actually met my husband on Tinder 10 years ago. The night before our first date, I was nervous (and drunk) and asked if we could exchange stupid selfies to feel less stressed. We sent each other horribly unflattering photos taken at that angle which gives you 25 chins. I was a bit taken aback at his 🤣 I wasn't expecting him to have a scrufy beard! Thought I'd see how I felt in real life, met up with him and he'd had a shave. Even if he hadn't, his is the loveliest face I've ever met!

Some people take shit pictures even if unintentional, might be worth a punt anyway 😊

This

don’t make an excuse up and protect his silly
ego

say what happened - you’ve uploaded a new picture and it’s so very different so I won’t be meeting you

I don’t understand why you’d arrange to meet someone initially on the back of blurry long-distance pictures? Did you like chatting to him? What was the trigger of wanting to meet him initially? I don’t think I’d want to meet someone I could only see fuzzy pictures of?

If you don’t want to meet him, be honest. It’s online so it’s the perfect opportunity to tell the truth. Just say, that on closer reflection the recent photos have put you off, and you’re not attracted to him so it would be a waste of everyone’s time to meet. That way he’s got some good feedback and hopefully will send clearer pictures in the future. No need to feel bad about it.

This. I'd do one. Might get a pleasant couple of hours and then say there was no spark. Photos don't reflect real life.

Setting aside his looks for a moment - why on earth did you agree to meet him if your conversations weren’t great?!

Yes I shouldn’t have agreed really, but I can’t get past the hoop earring and his awful stubbly beard, if it wasn’t for these I might have met him.

I know men get a bad rep but he's probably insecure, id give him a chance at least. People become attractive to me when I know them, so besides him being an actual ogre I think it's a bit harsh.

If it's just a stubbly beard, I bet he'll shave it

Then tomorrow you can come on here and say "I really like him but how do I persuade him to get rid of his earring?" 😂😂

Meet him anyway. He might be better in real life.

The ick has hit.

Honestly because he was the only one closest to me, lives in my town.

He said he had just grown it.
yes I probably will 😂

I think you should still meet him, then if you're really not feeling it, let him know that after.

But he’s really not my type, and we would just be wasting each other’s time, and I know I shouldn’t feel bad about telling him, but I know I will.

Because I thought if I met him in person it may be different, I know some people don’t like constant messaging.

Ok then don't meet him. I mean it's only an hour of your life to meet for a cuppa. I just think you'll only know for sure once you actually meet and talk with him. But if you don't want to give it a go, then don't.

You could tell the truth, if you had known that he wasn't clean shaven and wore an earring you wouldn't have been talking to him and there is no point in meeting.
Or make up a story to get out of the date, then be unavailable for chatting 99% of the time.

I tend not to worry about looks too much so arranged a date with someone not conventionally good looking (let’s say to be polite) - he was so much better in person!

Do it for us. We want to know what happens and how he compares in real life.

Or just say 'eek, I didn't realise you had a beard and I have a phobia of piercings so sorry I'm calling it off'

Just say you’ve decided to get back with an ex

Just tell him you’ve changed your mind, wish him well and crack on with the rest of your life. I can guarantee men don’t agonise about these kind of situations as much as women do.

I think this is what I will have to do.

I could say that 😂

Just tell him the truth, tell him you prefer clean shaven men and not beards. No
point in going if your not feeling it