What is supposed to be romantic, but just bloody isn’t?

[SmidgenofaPigeon]

A Semisonic song just came on the radio and brought me back to when I was 18, and the slightly-hippy lovely guy I was seeing at the time used to play this on his guitar and sing to me. The whole song, then another song after it. Sometimes another one after that. I’d sort of sit on the bed or hover in front of him while he played his little concert just for me and smile along, but I found it excruciating. If he didn’t want to kiss me he wanted to be singing to me. It was so boring and I never knew how I was supposed to be reacting.

I couldn’t hack it so we didn’t last, and my friend was horrified and said what a lovely romantic thing that was that he did and how awful I was for ending it 😂

Has anyone got any ‘romantic’ things to add that were just a bit boring/awkward?

Sharing a bath.

I was just about to say sharing a bath! Unless you have a massive tub, its just cramped and uncomfortable

Sharing a bath - fuck right off.

Ha - popular opinion!

Oh gosh, that would have made me cringe, even as a teenager.

Flowers. I mean, I like flowers and sometimes it’s nice to have fresh flowers in the house but I have just never really associated them with romance or anything vaguely emotional. I would always appreciate being given some flowers but wouldn’t find it ‘romantic’.

I had an ex that used to write poetry. It was every bit as cringy as you'd expect.

Paris

@Pleasedontputthatthere

Sharing a bath - fuck right off.

Don't hold back there I'm not much of a fan of holding hands.

I obviously used to attract them because at 20 I had a guy from my Drama class recite a sonnet to me on the Park and Ride.

Sharing a bath!! God no.

Haha this is so me that my friends send me pictures of men playing guitars to troll me. I had several boyfriends of this type and was always painfully wondering how many I'd have to listen to before we could have sex. If you move too early you let slip how utterly uninterested you are in their "music" and too late and you are just too bored to get your knickers off. Bane of my 20s

Massage. It can be quite nice, but doesn't do anything to get me in the mood as it were. Luckily DH agrees!

SmidgenofaPigeon

I was also going to say: sharing a bath. Unless you have a jacuzzi, it's going to be awkward.

You always end up with a foot up the bum.
An elbow with inevitably be crushed between a rib and the bath side
And boobs will be squished.

Then the god awful "Let's me wash your hair". Shampoo ends up in the eyes, resulting in temporary blindness.

Sharing a bath. Like sharing a bath with a baby hippo with my husband.

Oysters. Like swallowing semen.

An ex used to serenade me too. Nothing is more awkward than looking in to the eyes of someone who is playing a guitar and singing to you. I get the same feeling from looking a dog in the eyes when it’s doing a poo.

@MedusasBadHairDay

I had an ex that used to write poetry. It was every bit as cringy as you'd expect.

Oh god, me too. I came on here to write that. It was the worst.

Sex in the sand. I can barely lie down on a beach towel without feeling uncomfortable. Sand sticks everywhere just ugh.

Sex that's completely focused on my experience and my pleasure. Like a full body massage followed by oral for hours. If I just wanted to relax and have an orgasm, I would just take a bath and masturbate.

Oh the ‘let me wash your hair’ thing! I can’t bear the thought, unless I’d been in a terrible accident and couldn’t do it myself and I had really skanky hair. I think it’s a really odd thing to do for an able-bodied adult!

I'll second Paris, dog mess everywhere we went and oh the joy of sitting on the Metro and watching a well dressed gent picking his nose and wiping it on the window

A new boyfriend in my twenties once said he wanted me to fall asleep in his arms so he could carry me up to bed and watch me sleep all night. Cringy and creepy.

@ShirleyPhallus

Sharing a bath. Like sharing a bath with a baby hippo with my husband.

Oysters. Like swallowing semen.

An ex used to serenade me too. Nothing is more awkward than looking in to the eyes of someone who is playing a guitar and singing to you. I get the same feeling from looking a dog in the eyes when it’s doing a poo.

🤣

One of my first boyfriends took me to watch the sunset... around a fishing lodge, there was an old fisherman coughing up a lung, all the benches were knackered, dog shit everywhere and a view of the main road with the bus stop and pub which had a couple of blokes stood outside smoking and drinking their pints.

Agree on sharing a bath. Also add sex in the shower.

Feathery stroking. No !

Showering together, there's no bloody room. Who gets to stand under the water and who stands there freezing? If theres a shower door you bang into it, if it's curtain it sticks you.
And it's slippy.

I'll third Paris. Don't get it at all

Gazing into each others eyes - it's not romantic, it's awkward and weird.