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Fil reluctant to serve niether myself nor dh nice champagne?

999 replies

KnittedJimmychoos · 24/04/2021 22:07

Fudged details in case the eye of sauron gets hold...

But Mil and fil had been entertaining their friends, say Peter and Jane... Dh and I came in after their meal... And fil opened a really nice bottle of champagne.. Dh and I sat down chatting and fil served his friend but not me?
I made eyes at dh so he got a glass and went to serve me a glass, dh was driving and also doesn't like it.. Fil suddenly looked panicked and asked who was driving, and as dh poured he tried to make sure it was a half glass even though dh said he was ie empty excuse ? Meanwhile he then took the bottle and topped up his fiend chatting happily!
Dh then took bottle to fill me up and again fil seemed panicky!!
I did say I only fancied one glass.. And he sort of sucked in his breath and looked at me like a five year old and said "this is a really good bottle".

For context there is no way on earth my df would ever serve one person like this and not another!
Maybe he got out this bottle and hadn't reckoned on us coming back but isn't this the height of rudeness?? The mother of his only grandchildren??

Pils live in house worth a few million, not London, are very well off.. Have a wine cupboard.. They also treat dh like this.. On other stuff... Ie this wasn't a treasured special bottle saved for anniversary they can't replace..
I'm not keen anyway but I felt this was so unpleasant! Your not good enough for me to give nice champagne too!
Can't say the make because its fudged details.

Or.. Is it understandable to only want to serve this to his pal who it was intended for? I often feel like we are treated like second class citizens!!

OP posts:
DungeonKeeper · 24/04/2021 22:28

I caught dh eye and "made eyes" to the bottle as no moves had been made to get me or indeed dh a drink..

Yeah I would never do that.

Bluntness100 · 24/04/2021 22:28

If he really wanted ro see the family friend he should have set up something to see them, you know, made his own arrangements like an adult

How old are you both? I’m guessing really young?

BramStoker · 24/04/2021 22:28

It was rude to ‘drop in’ when you clearly weren’t invited

If you and DH really want to catch up with Peter and Jane then invite them over to your house and supply the champagne yourself!

UhtredRagnarson · 24/04/2021 22:28

He didn’t invite them to stay

That’s exactly what he did when he let them through the door.

Pebbledashery · 24/04/2021 22:29

Have you downed a bottle whilst writing your latest update? 🤔

Skyliner001 · 24/04/2021 22:29

All your updates just make you sound more and more grabby 😂😂

BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand · 24/04/2021 22:30

@UhtredRagnarson

And for the PPs criticising the FIL’s hosting... he wasn’t actually hosting OP on this occasion!

Once he let them through the door he was hosting them.

This is bollocks. Letting someone in briefly is not the same as inviting and hosting someone.
Bluntness100 · 24/04/2021 22:30

@UhtredRagnarson

He didn’t invite them to stay

That’s exactly what he did when he let them through the door.

Really? So anyone steps foot in your home is automatically invited to stay as long as they wish.

Well ok then. Not in my or anyone else’s house who is posting.

UhtredRagnarson · 24/04/2021 22:30

And Fwiw OP and her DH were very rude too! They shouldn’t have turned up like that and when they weren’t offered the champagne they should have taken the hint and left. But FIL was also rude.

MrsRockAndRoll · 24/04/2021 22:30
Biscuit
Bluntness100 · 24/04/2021 22:30

This is bollocks. Letting someone in briefly is not the same as inviting and hosting someone

Exactly.

BakedTattie · 24/04/2021 22:30

Dear god I hope I never had a daughter in law like you. Even if you are ‘the mother of their only grandchildren’

What an absolute rocket

GappyValley · 24/04/2021 22:30

@UhtredRagnarson

And for the PPs criticising the FIL’s hosting... he wasn’t actually hosting OP on this occasion!

Once he let them through the door he was hosting them.

No, that’s not how hosting works

Or I would be footing an enormous booze bill for my builders right now.

Uninvited and unwanted guests do not suddenly become invited and wanted because they cross a threshold

UhtredRagnarson · 24/04/2021 22:30

Really? So anyone steps foot in your home is automatically invited to stay as long as they wish.

Confused not at all what I said. I said he was hosting them. You’re not usually daft like this @Bluntness100

lunar1 · 24/04/2021 22:31

I can't imagine why you weren't invited!

daisypond · 24/04/2021 22:31

We don’t know that FIL let them in. It could be MIL. The first FIL might know of their arrival was when they plonked themselves down just as he was pouring out the champagne for his friends.

Pebbledashery · 24/04/2021 22:31

If someone turned up to my house uninvited whilst I was hosting... They'd be out the back door as quick as they came through the front door 😆.. I don't have an open house policy at my house.. You're invited when you're invited.

JackieWeaverFever · 24/04/2021 22:31

What in God's name is wrong with people on here? It's like upside down land sometimes.

It is insanely rude. Your FIL is insanely rude
No one in the real world would shrug and think this is okay or normal. It's weird and petty.

Your FIL sounds somewhat unpleasant and presumably has some kind of issue with your husband (and maybe you?).

UhtredRagnarson · 24/04/2021 22:31

Letting someone in briefly is not the same as inviting and hosting someone.

I didn’t say I inviting.

Bluntness100 · 24/04/2021 22:32

@lunar1

I can't imagine why you weren't invited!
And to just ignore their wishes and turn up, and then when irs clear they don’t want you to,stay start making eyes to the bottle so you can join in against their wishes.
DungeonKeeper · 24/04/2021 22:32

The mother of his only grandchildren??

Slightly dramatic.

category12 · 24/04/2021 22:32

You turned up uninvited and they obviously didn't want you there or expect you there, and you just turn up and want champagne. You're the rude ones.

AgentJohnson · 24/04/2021 22:33

When you host them do they also turn up unannounced? The cheek of you making eyes at your H so he would give you their alcohol, there’s brazen and then there’s this behaviour.

Verdict: Congratulations, you and your H are one pair of CF’s.

UhtredRagnarson · 24/04/2021 22:33

@Pebbledashery

If someone turned up to my house uninvited whilst I was hosting... They'd be out the back door as quick as they came through the front door 😆.. I don't have an open house policy at my house.. You're invited when you're invited.
Wouldn’t you just not let them in the front door? “Hi Jane, what a surprise. We actually have visitors with us this evening, can I give you a ring tomorrow?”
DartmoorChef · 24/04/2021 22:34

You were both rude and cheeky.

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