Guess what I've been sent...

[Kumquatsquash]

Ordered some stock for my shop from Alibaba. As soon as I opened the box I suspected something was wrong as the wraps are bigger than expected. Can you guess what's in them?

@GoudaGirl

Of course possibly to use to meditate whilst on you very own yoni electric steam throne (not recommended by the way) whilst wearing a beguiling yoni steam cape. www.etsy.com/uk/listing/848066853/deluxe-electric-steam-throne There's a veritable catalogue of items to curate for a theme based shop in etsy to be had. I never knew there was so much pampering to be done..

The 3rd review on that says "came fast"! 🤣🤣🤣

This is amazing!!!

Well that was unexpected 😂😂😂😂

@Anne1958

I absolutely love lapis lazuli but that one kind of looks like the model has a wicked case of labial lichen sclerosus

I’m hoping that was a lucky guess and we haven’t actually met in real life.

😂😂😂

Yoni Eggs are carved from crystals into the shape of eggs. They are inserted into the vagina for up to 12 hours per day for the purpose of strengthening the vaginal muscles, connecting with your Sacred femininity, and toning the pelvic floor.

But what if your pelvic floor isn’t up to it? Do you end up laying an egg in the middle of Sainsbury’s?

Well this thread has brightened up my afternoon

Well, there's obviously been a cock up!

Ooh lovely! Hand carved vulvas £19.99 and rose quartz wands £30.43 for sale on Etsy.
Who knew!
You are going to be quids in OP.

Just read your whole thread OP, of all the things I guessed Crystal Vaginas was not one of them! Bloody brilliant! Please stock them

Awesome! I would market them as "Goddess Meditation Stones" and talk about holding them while getting in touch with the Divine Feminine Power nods sagely whilst taking a bong hit

Brings a whole new meaning to crack!

Gross.

Whoever processed your order clearly made a cunt of it.

I love this!!

Those who have suggested fanny paperweights..👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🤣

@TooTrueToBeGood

Whoever processed your order clearly made a cunt of it.

😂

@Kumquatsquash that’s brilliant. Never ceases to amaze me what’s out there to buy if you just go looking.

Perhaps you could package yours with some fudge vulvas for Valentine’s Day
www.fudgeina.com/

We will now know who’s a mumsnetter when we see a crystal cunt in a mates display cabinet

semolina

OMFG that's made my day

My friend in the US has a business making vulva-based items and she would love these! I am not joking... she’s Californian. Obviously

I would like the rose quartz one for my home office...... you will need to let us know when they are on sale and how you descibe the item so we can google them. Who knew i wanted a quartz vag.

Are you Gwyneth Paltrow?

@Lindylindyloo

semolina

I don't know why, but after the rest of the thread this made me snort out loud.

RTFT @Lindylindyloo

I held it together until @Blueraccon's laying an egg in Sainsburys comment

some bloke in Hull is wondering where his order has gone.

Cooee - Brian!!