Which sentence did you say today that you'd never have said a month ago?

[Bluewavescrashing]

Me- 'Wash your hands, you've just touched the post!'

I thoight for your birthday treat we could turn the spare room into a home gym. (Me to about to turn 16 DS)

No you cannot go to school and see your friends.
Yesterday morning to my eldest DC.

'I thought it was Easter this Sunday! Does it matter though, who is going to know the difference'?

I'll hold the box, you pull it out, then I'll throw the box away and wash my hands.

If you touch that I'll have to bleach it again.

After reading one too many Coronavirus threads here on MN, I now ask people IRL 'what's the source of that ' when they tell me something about the virus and get annoyed if their source is facebook

You want a bath -now ? Ok let's go.

Said to my youngest this morning at 10am

“Does anyone want any stamps?” My mundane trip to the only post office in our city that is open is now of interest to everyone in our cul de sac who put in orders for their stamps for me to buy. Weird!

OMG they've got toilet paper!!!!

'Do you think I should wear latex gloves to carry in the shopping'

‘We’ve lost the equivalent of your monthly income’ Followed up with ‘I’m scared’ after totting up how much losing my job and dh being on 80% has cost us.

‘Yes, I’d love to play Pokemon’.

'You said you were hungry, that was your last favourite pizza and your wasting it - who know when we'll be able to get that again!'

The cucumber is on the doorstep.

(Neighbours asked if I could grab one on our weekly shop)

Iceland have got a slot at 3pm tomorrow!

"I just had to tell a stupid man off for standing in my area, it's bloody ridiculous in Spar!"
😂

Following large food shop and my daughter and husband overly excited about all the nice food 'try to average out the nice food to last us'

‘If this continues for another 6 months I really think we ought to get one of those 1kg+ tins of confit de canard.’

My DH didn’t agree with me that it’s a long-term-lockdown essential...

I miss the office!

Fuck it, let's open the corn beef.

*corned beef

Also never thought I'd correct a typo related to said corned beef

I've got scales in my webbings - describing the state of my hands to my sisters after what feels like months of hand washing and alcohol gel....

Hooray, I’m being furloughed!

Doorbell rang. I yelled to the DC, "Don't open it! Someone might be there!".

I can't pick the baby up right now as I've just touched the door handle outside

"So, can you tell me 2 types of igneous rock?"